I'll fist your cuffs

Furry hard

[notajerusalemcricket-deactivate]

Absolutely not a new observation but i love that the toki pona word for animal, "soweli," is written like this

fuck man that sure is

[notajerusalemcricket-deactivate]

I have less than 200 followers and this got ~80 notes in the span of hours

Bitches love Animal

[witchblade]

[catcryptid]

[edwad]

now that everyone from twitter has joined tumblr overnight, it's time to lay a couple ground rules:

1. it's not called a "retweet", it's called a "reblog", but if you're REALLY cool, you refer to it as a "rebagel"

2. if someone has fewer followers than you, it is totally fair to call them "irrelevant", but it is actually more stinging to call them "irrelephant"

3. if you see someone irl that you think might have a tumblr, you're supposed to say "i like your shoe laces". the correct response, which any true tumblrite would know by heart, is "thanks, i stole them from the president"

4. there is a particular phenomenon that happens after 12am EST called "nightblogging", and everything after this point is the fault of the australians

5. tumbeasts

[fistlycuffs]

Dare I make a new art tumblr and rebrand on here

[yallive-deactivated20260426]

new friend incoming

[yallive-deactivated20260426]

fuck this

[corvidcharlie]

the tags killed me

[crappycheese]

I like to imagine angels viewing us as littol creetures

[ursulaklegun-deactivated2024122]

People who love cold weather are fucking weird. You like to freeze? You like to shiver?? You like when you take a step outside and the air stings your skin???

[peacemode]

[darksteel-relic]

[asingularcanadian]

[prodigalstranger]

[zippityzap]

The lettuce is now throwing a party

[catcrumb]

[mercuryfountain-deactivated2024]

Oh but if I tried to open a PUSSY’S sporting goods how would that play out? 🤨

[campyvillain]

ohhhhum i don’t know…. sorry *puts my hands in my pocket* *walks away glumly *walks into a parking lot*seagull attack

[memewhore]

[spleenyz]

[fallout-lou-begas]

[hornetstabber]

[horse-is-a-horse-of-course]

PTSD? You got pussy taste speldiferous disorder???

i don’t even know what to say here.

[horse-is-a-horse-of-course]

you know what. yes. i do got pussy taste splendiferous disorder.

[humblegrub]

triops are one of my all-time fave little guys

[steveinaspeedo]

[hungwy]

*watches my only beloved son slide down this and crinkle up like a crushed soda can*

[piss-bong]

A weighted blanket isn’t enough I need to be vacuum sealed

[piss-bong]

Someone do this to me

[teaboot]

As a sex shop worker I have what could be either excellent or upsetting news

[tiptapricot]

A companion piece to this 💖

(ID in ALT)

[whisperdal-deactivated20230131]

Wow, this reminds me of that one episode of Hannah Montana where--[I am taken by the Fungus.]

[wagamaggot]