Ciao

This blog is trash and I will spam your dash Just a 24 y/o gremlin who managed to leave the Tumblrscape due to a far too busy life but has inevitably come crawling back when it calmed down again

[stupidfuckingquestions]

[zebablah-deactivated20160105]

television history

[virginmarx]

i’ve been trying to explain this sketch to people for years

[real-faker]

there is literally no way to explain this sketch it’s just a thing you have to see and even then I’m not sure why it’s so funny

[identityarchitect]

there are like five rules to life and those rules are

1. eat 3 meals a day

2. always have a non alcoholic drink with you

3. never trust anything you think about your life after 8-9pm

4. do a little something for urself every day

5. interact with a Beast at least once a day (human, feline, canine, lizard, bird, etc)

and the secret 6th rule:

6. if you can't do all of those rules, just do the ones you can

[vicholas]

sometimes you feel like reblogging only like 5 posts through the whole day. other time you feel like reblogging like 50 posts in one hour. so is the turbulent and unpredictable life of a tumblr girl.

[oof-i-did-it-agaaiiin]

hell is freezing over for theatre people everywhere

[oof-i-did-it-agaaiiin]

[moringmark]

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

It’s kind of funny to me how little first aid experience many people have. My fifty-ish coworker who’s a mother of two boys and a parks employee of twenty years did not understand any kind of wound care beyond “slap a bandaid on it” so I had to stop her, sit her down, put on gloves, and gently clean and dress her wounded knee with antiseptic and real bandages while she watched in fascination and made jokes about me being her doctor. Ma’am this is first aid 101.

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

also the number of people who think that the point of adhesive bandaids is to stop bleeding rather than to protect a wound as it heals is shocking

[eponymous-rose]

Just saw someone on campus stop the person ahead of me to ask for directions and this poor man just looks at the student's phone and goes "I don't know how to tell you this... you're on the wrong campus. You're in the wrong city."

[ampervadasz]

Unmute !

[dr-falcon-fox-and-coyote]

Thought process of announcers: why don’t we get another ball…?

OR MayBE WE SHOULD GET A CHEERLEADER! THEY’RE USED TO GOING UP HIGH

OH LOOK, THE CHEERLEADER HAS DONE IT

[teaboot]

[lizzibennet]

wish we still lived in the timeline where tiktok was still called musical.ly and hated by 99% of the internet

[flimflix]

[tomokoshiretoko]

best of Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney

[naamahdarling]

I'm sorry I can't read that book you recommended. Yeah, no, it's just that beginning something new that I don't know if I'm in the mood for is to me what plastic bags are to horses and if you play 30 seconds of an unfamiliar audiobook I WILL spook and break two of my legs.

[naamahdarling]

I can't even bring myself to read books I WANT to read, what the fuck makes anyone think they have more power over me than the dopamine-sucking rat inside my own brain? You say a movie is super good and want me to watch it so we can talk about it? No. That's homework now. My brain selects what is Acceptable based on something between ornithomancy and letting a cat knock over some cups. Nobody understands it. I am ruled by it. Doctors refuse to adequately medicate me for it. I will watch the latest Pixar movie when and only when you prop my corpse in front of the television and the coins fall off my eyes.

Yes this is about ADHD.

[iguessweallcrazyithinktho]

[lumpsbumpsandwhumps]

[i-can-even-burn-salad]

[ID: A stock image with visible watermark, showing three cutely dressed girls. They’re sitting at a low couch table, with pens in hand, writing or drawing something in a book each. The image is labeled: Me and the besties, writing the most horrific trauma for a fictional character to endure. End ID.]

[halflifealyx]

What's the funniest channel they're airing the queen's funeral on? I'm torn between sky crime, sky comedy, and babenation

[brucebocchi]

[greyramblings]

If you read this post you are contractually obligated to say one (1) good thing about yourself. No self depreciation.