A digital painting of sorts of one of my ocs. The main part is one layer, the strings are on their own layer.
Had fun using various different brushes, and just eyeballing a lot of the colours. It's definitely not perfect, the lighting and anatomy are probably not accurate. But I had fun trying to just not care too much. 10/10 would recommend :)
It's a difficult thing, to realise you changed. That you've lost the traits that once was at the core of your identity. The things you were so proud to define yourself by.
To realise it's gone and you don't really know who you are anymore
I was thinking about my sonas, and how the way i picture myself, may not be how others view me. And it was rather upsetting to realise, just how different the me my friends get to see, is to the me I think of myself as. The me I still view myself as, and wish to believe I still am, or could be.
Chronic illness and disability can really mess with you in more ways than one. It can take more than just your physical ability. It can take your sense of self
Started a new DND campaign on Thursday, so let me introduce y'all to my character:
Sylvia Swiftclaw
But you can just call her Sylvie :)
She's a swiftstrider shifter (werecat adjacent) bard warlock.
She's an entertainer who has hit hard times. She's always been a little clumsy, and stupidly unlucky. Luckily she's always been very optimistic and good at just keeping on, keeping on. She enjoys making others smile and laugh. She really enjoys travelling, the beautiful sights, everything you can learn and experience, and the feeling of being free that comes with it.
She is a stupid lesbian, as in a lesbian that turns incredibly stupid around pretty people. Her critical judgement, or common sense turns off if a pretty person tells her something. Which is very unfortunate considering her type is "looks kinda mean" and "could ruin my life". her friends have had to pull her away from many unfortunate situations.
The past year and a half has been really difficult for her, she lost some family, and accidentally got "engaged" to a demon?? She's also been unable to find her old troupe
Speaking of, she used to be part of a trope of traveling entertainers of all sorts called "The Wayward Bards"
She was just a silly guy, a cutie pattotie with joy and whimsy in her eyes :D, before the horrors got to her
I am pretty happy with her design, I especially love giving characters small "imperfections" like beauty marks, scars with stupid stories,(the scar under her lip is from faceplanting when trying to do a trick) and her tooth gap! I love her pointy teeth with her tooth gap. Oh and also, she's got cheek fluff! cause I believe in cheek fluff for cat girls!!
Long expansive backstory under the cut for those interested (and so my bestie who's in the same campaign can skip out, even though I've already told him a lot, I see you there👁️🫵) (but uh, seriously, it's loooong)
Part 1. Childhood
Sylvie was born on a ship during a storm. Thankfully, everyone made it home safe, however her mother always viewed her as bad luck. When she turned one, there was yet another devastating storm. When she turned two, there was a famine sweeping the country. When she turned three, a plague broke out. When it was nearing her fourth birthday, her mother had planned to take her out into the woods, and leave her for dead. But when she had looked into her eyes, and saw the wonder, amazement, and joy in her daughter's eyes as they walked through the woods. She just couldn't bring herself to do it. Two weeks later when Sylvie turned four, her mother was detained. She never learned what for. And she never learned what happened to her.
Her father couldn't support her and her siblings on his own. Sylvia's two older siblings has already moved out, howee her and her younger siblings were still too young. luckily when a kind woman had heard of their situation on her travel through town, she offered to take Sylvie and her two younger siblings in.
The kind woman was an elf, named Liagella Mossheart. She was a strong woman with a kind heart. She had previously been a soldier, however after getting seriously injured in a battle where many of her closest friends were lost, she retired. However her want to help, and protect people never faltered. She had settled in a small settlement placed by the woods. Despite her injuries, she took up the role as a ranger, foraging in the woods, and hunting. She did her best to look out for both the people of the settlement and the forest, and was fairly well respected.
She had previously taken in another child, a half elf named Norah, who had been recently orphaned. So when she heard of the struggles of Sylvia's family, she took in her and her two younger siblings.
Sylvia grew up comfortably in the small settlement with her older sister, Norah, two younger siblings, fog and cinder(twins), and her mom, Liagella. They all got along well for the most part. It was a comfortable quiet town to grow up in. She was a curious, eager and joyful child, always curious what others were doing, and wanting to help out. She was rather clumsy, and tended to have almost comedically bad luck. but even when she'd fall flat on her face she'd bounce right back up with a "I'm okay" and keep smiling. She always kept going. She also found a lot of joy in trying to make others laugh. She'd practice jokes, tricks, and acrobatics(often landing flat on her face) and even managed to pull off some magic tricks.
She also learnt to play a lot of instruments. Fog wanted to be a musician, and was very talented. He happily taught Sylvie when she asked. Fog was often sick as a child, so he couldn't play out in the woods as much, so getting to play music together was great. Even when Fog's goals changed, they'd still play a lot together. They were very close.
She was also fairly close to Norah. Norah was always very caring and responsible, but she still enjoyed playing with Sylvie. Even though she'd get constant heart attacks from every time Sylvie ended up faceplanting into the ground.
Cinder never wanted to play. He didn't really want anything to do with anyone.
Part 1.5 the longing for something more
As Sylvia got older, she'd help her mom with her job as much as she could. She'd always see how her mom's injuries would act up when she'd push herself, and she was scared she'd push herself too hard and get seriously injured. And with how much she'd done for them in their upbringing she felt it was only right to help lighten the load for her mother as much as she could. However, over the years there was this though knawing at the back of her mind. A question if there's something more for her. A want to see what's out there. But she felt she had to stay and help her mom. Norah was leaving soon to become a knight. And Fog wanted to be a healer/priest. And Cinder...
Her mom figured Sylvie wouldn't be happy just helping her for all her life. She always knew Sylvie's path would lead her somewhere else. She'd encourage Sylvie to follow her heart, and insisted she'd be fine on her own.
Sylvie was torn. until one day on a trip to a nearby town, she heard of a group. A group of performers of all kinds, who travel the world putting on shows wherever they go. "The Wayward Bards" she couldn't stop thinking about it. And when she heard one day that they were coming to that very town!? She had to take the shot. At 17 She said goodbye to her family, with hugs, kisses, and well wishes, and set off to join "The Wayward Bards"
Part 2. Following the dream
Sylvie ends up meeting many talented performers, all with different specialities. As she traveled, She connected with many people, forming unbreakable bonds. One of which, to their surprise, turned out to be her older brother, Thunder! They got to fill each other in on how the rest of their family is doing. Their father has remarried, and had more kids. However their father doesn't really want much to do with his "old family". But that's not really important to them, they're just happy to have found each other again. Someone else she ends up connecting strongly with, is tresher(my besties oc! who he's not playing in this camping...) an extravagant merfolk. They end up practically inseparable.
For 6 years, they travel together. The best 6 years of Sylvie's life. She got to travel the world she'd been yearning to see. Travelling town to town, she was amazed by the different scenery. Seeing the beauty of new places and their animals was like seeing the beauty of the woods for the first time as a child again. She also got to see the different cultures, with their different clothes, buildings, technology, and food. She loved to try new food, even if she didn't always like it. It was about the experience! And she got to bring smiles to so many people with her stupid jokes and jests. She'd occasionally see some there, who was clearly not doing too well, and feeling down. Sometimes it was someone brought by their friends, trying to cheer them up. Some alone. But if she'd get them to smile, or chuckle, even for just a moment, it'd be the highlight of her day. Bringing a moment of joy to those who need it most. Even if it involves comedically tripping off the stage. But what was probably the best thing about it, was something she wasn't expected to find, or knew she needed. It was the community she found. This group of people with similar goals, filled with passion. All with different personalities, backgrounds, and histories. Everyone so different, Somehow brought together. It was amazing.
One time when they traveled by, she got to visit home. But for the most part, She'd send letters home whenever she had the chance. She'd tell about all the beautiful nature she'd seen, sending a leaf or something from every place they went. And assured Norah she was safe, and keeping out of trouble. She had both a best friend and older brother to look out for her. And she'd tell Fog about all the new instruments she's seen, and even got to try! And especially all the new songs she learned, and how she just couldn't wait to teach him them when she returns home!
But good things can't last forever
Her best friend tresher received a message, his master had died. He had to leave.
Part 3. The sun goes down
nearly a month later. On her 23rd birthday, Sylvie receives a letter from her home town.
Her younger brother Fog, had passed away. He'd been trying to help cure people of an illness that had been spreading. Unfortunately he caught it too, and despite the Hellers best effort, he didn't make it.
Sylvie said goodbye to the troupe, and returned home to grieve, and to help her family. When she got home, there was a memorial being held. Fog had helped a lot of people, so many did their best to show their support of their family through this difficult time. Sylvie got to reconnect with Norah and her mother, however she learned Cinder had run away, as he'd become a wanted criminal. It was a difficult time for them all. After two months, Norah had to return to her training. However, Sylvie stayed with her mother for a year. She just couldn't leave her all alone, not like this. And she was scared of what could happen if she left. When she left, she never thought it could be the last time she saw part of her family. She never considered they wouldn't be there waiting for her when she came back. She was supposed to have all the time in the world to tell Fog about their adventures, and play songs together. All of a sudden, she'd blinked, and her family, the future she'd imagined, was gone. She was scared to leave again. What if someone happened to her mother when she's not there.
Her mother couldn't stand seeing Sylvie give up on her dreams, especially after hearing how happy she was on her tour. She insisted she'd be fine, that she may not have her kids there, but she's still got her friends and community. So after being home for almost a year, Sylvie went out on her own, to live her life. Hoping to find her old troupe.
Part 4.
Sylvie traveled from town to town, hoping to hear about her old troupe, but mostly just trying to live her life. She performed at ins, and festivals. Meeting new people, some nice, some not as much. She'd travel with some for a while, but then they'd reach their destination and she'd have to go on without them. She'd often try and shoot her shot, looking for love. Sometimes she'd stay a long time in a town, other times she'd try her charms on the wrong person, and had to leave as fast and quiet as she could. She was doing ok. She got to perform, and travel. It was lonely at times, and scary, but she powered through. One thing she really enjoyed was the freedom she felt. She was free to go wherever she wanted for once. She was still hoping to hear from her old troupe, she missed them. But having the freedom to travel wherever she wanted, no worries about scheduling or deciding with a group was nice. She never knew how great freedom felt.
One day after getting to a new town, and having settled in at the in, she had just finished a performance, and had spotted this gorgeous thieflig lady. She was tall, elegant, had these BIG tits curved horns, beautiful hair, and orange glowing eyes that looked a little mean. Sylvie just HAD to shoot her shot. So she chugged down her drink and did her best. She doesn't even really remember what she said, it was something stupid like "are you a devil? Cause you have devilishly good looks, and I'd happily sell my soul for a chance with you~"
Anyway be careful who you tell your cheesy pickup lines to! Cause the answer was yes. And some might want to hold you to your words
What happened next was all a blur. First it seemed her pick-up line actually landed, and they're flirting. Then they ended up somewhere more private... And suddenly she wanted to form a contract, and wouldn't let her go...
Sylvie ended up "engaged" to a (very controlling) devil, and she's not handling it well... It feels like part of her newly discovered freedom has just been stripped from her. She feels stupid, pathetic, and lost. But that's just her luck.
(Start of campaign) She's trying to just truck on, and has taken up a job to help a professor from the university in the town she was in, on an expedition. She's hoping being on the road again will help get her mind off of things. As well as potentially learning of a way to break this contract.
Anyway I managed to break out of my art rut a little with the help of a new medium. And two of my favourite ocs. My dearest darling emo Veronica(purple), and her bestie, River.(Green)
They mean a lot to me <3 and I'm pretty proud of these pieces.
If you want to see me ramble there's some explanations under the cut
The right side of Veronicas face is scared, she's blind on that side, and I had a lot of fun with it. Depicting it as shattered. And how she's fine with it around River. How the heavy weight it carries with it is lifted.
The art process was a nice change of pace, and fit the characters pretty well actually. It went: water colour - inking - white posca pen - inking again. However River ended up not needing the inking, fey just came so naturally, and ended up well defined just with the watercolor. I thought the kinda natural ethereal look fit them well. Veronica on the other hand was an absolute mess at the watercolor stage (at least on the piece with river), it was just a vague guide. I had to kinda chisel her out with posca via her hair. But it's kinda fitting, she was an absolute mess who had to redefine herself, and her hair was a bit part in that :)
River is more able to "go with the flow" while Veronica goes against the grain to redefine herself
If I was a character in a show, there'd be one one of those episodes where the rest of the cast find out it's someone's birthday, but they never told anyone, and they decide to throw them a surprise birthday party. But it all goes to shit when they find out the reason no one knew their birthday was cause they hate their birthday. and they like, run out and cries or something.
"She's just a silly little guy :3" I say, about my deeply disturbed/traumatized and tragic character, prone to frequent disassociation (for good reason)
I mean, she started out as a funny silly concept in the shower.
But then came, the horrors
And now she's just my silly little guy :3 (I say, holding up my severely disassociating oc)
Turning the sides into women in my head. And I'm trying to think of good names for them that are still similar and have a similar vibe.
Janus is easy. It's just pronounced "Janice"
Patton I feel would be "Paddy"
For Roman I feel "Roma" could work?
Remus I'm unsure. I'm thinking either "Rema" or "Remula" maybe? Are those names?
Logan my gut says "Lola" cause the only other thing I can think of is "loga" which sounds too much like "Olga" and feels too old lady like?
Virgil i feel an easy name could be "veronica" however I can't use that cause I already have a (favourite) oc that's a purple emo named Veronica. However the only other name I can think of is "Virginia" and I just... Idk I don't want him named that??
I'm really bad at names, so If anyone has any better name suggestions please help me out 🙏
Have several versions of Virgil that i made for fun.
he is my muse, my canvas. A dress up doll, a ball of clay i can shape into whatever i want
Anyway, we have my normal ish interpretation, a bat, raccoon, cat, and spider version (the most common animal associations) of him, a femme outfit, and a girl version :)
Ok so, what I got from Thomas and the sides realising Virgil was around even before appearing to them, when looking back in WIDS. Is that a side that's either not fully formed or realised/recognised, isn't visible to Thomas (and possibly the other sides) in the moment, but they can still feel their influence. And that they're visible in retrospect.
So let me add on, imagine, looking back. Everyone dismissing Logan, and orange is just in the back yelling "are you seriously gonna let them treat you that way!!"
Ok so, what I got from Thomas and the sides realising Virgil was around even before appearing to them, when looking back in WIDS. Is that a side that's either not fully formed or realised/recognised, isn't visible to Thomas (and possibly the other sides) in the moment, but they can still feel their influence. And that they're visible in retrospect.
