if shen wants to be a man on estrogen good for him
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

@theartofmadeline
almost home

ellievsbear
icyghini twinkie
cherry valley forever
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

pixel skylines

bliss lane
RMH
Misplaced Lens Cap
Keni
Fai_Ryy
No title available
h
Cosimo Galluzzi

#extradirty
sheepfilms

No title available
KIROKAZE
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@ghostqueefs
if shen wants to be a man on estrogen good for him
i rlly do dislike when people downplay the feral hog problem in the US bc they are genuinely a massive pest in a lot of the south since early colonizers literally set them free on purpose when they got here so they would have a familiar source of food and so they could continue the european aristocratic practice of boar-hunting 😭
like you understand that this is a LOT of fucking pigs right?
and its getting worse not better!
Left is MY FIC, right is the ACTUAL BOOK QUOTE IT WAS INSPIRED BY
(Mask context: masquerade ball / cinderella au)
It has been doing numbers EVERYWHERE and I only found out from this lovely person who commented on Ao3:
So yeah I guess if anyone wants to read an 8 year old Song of Achilles fanfic written in a fever dream after watching Into The Woods, be my guest
I shit you not, one of my friends got engaged and used this for their caption yesterday 😭😭😭
Should I tell her 🤭
NOOOOOO OH MY GOD LMAO
That is a new level of containment breach
tch... so it's an alliance out of necessity, huh...?
I really don’t want to open this can of worms because Tumblr hath no fury like people called out on their political performativeness but it is literally driving me up the wall to watch people react to Serkis’ ‘keep Tolkien white’ commentary by insisting twice as hard that Tolkien would descend down to earth and dropkick the entire Republican party to hell or whatever, just because they want to ensure that a piece of media they enjoy isn’t seen as being morally impure. Case in point: I have seen at least five instances of Tolkien’s ‘I hate apartheid’ valedictorian address being used as a ‘counter’ to Serkis being racist, including by actual news outlets.
Except it’s only ever the ‘I hate apartheid’ line that’s shared, and not the actual quote in its full context. Because here it is:
If we consider what Merton College and what the Oxford School of English owes to the Antipodes, to the Southern Hemisphere, especially to scholars born in Australia and New Zealand, it may well be felt that it is only just that one of them should now ascend an Oxford chair of English. Indeed it may be thought that justice has been delayed since 1925. There are of course other lands under the Southern Cross. I was born in one; though I do not claim to be the most learned of those who have come hither from the far end of the Dark Continent. But I have the hatred of apartheid in my bones; and most of all I detest the segregation or separation of Language and Literature. I do not care which of them you think White.
Which is to say. This isn’t exactly the antiracist quote of the century, to say the least. This is a white South Africa born man and a white Australian shaking hands and going ‘omg we relate’ and expressing what is a very, very mild ‘segregation is not great’ opinion in order to convey his thoughts on an academic subject, ie the confluence of language and literature. Using race to make a point about his own subject of interest, in his own interest, which is, amusingly enough, what a lot of ostensibly well meaning progressive seem to be doing.
I also think that some of the general surprise around ‘what do you mean large swathes of the Tolkien fandom are incredibly conservative!?’ in lib/left Tolkien fandom is the result of a tendency in said parts of the fandom to transpose one’s own progressiveness onto Tolkien and turn a blind eye to things like, say, the Shire being a very specifically mid-century British racist construct that is very, very clear in its politics, often going so far as to insist it’s anarchist or an ideal society or whatever the fuck… and then getting really Pikachu-meme ‘but they’re misreading it’ every single time a conservative explains exactly what it is about the legendarium that they really love, and get surprised when someone uses the Shire being a racist construct to do more racism. It is 2026 let us do away with ‘I don’t see colour’ interpretations of media, I beg. Nobody is cancelling you for enjoying a book that is not kind to race. Most of the books I love are not kind to race.
friendly reminder that [the most cherrypicked interpretation of the text possible] <3
I wanna be the Rodney Dangerfield of trans woman dick jokes, I wanna stand up on stage and be like "I just get dicks respected."
Wearing the same bad suit and tugging my necktie down like "ah, my wife left me, y'know. Well they didn't leave me, they left their gender, we're still married I just don't got no wife anymore! I can't blame them though, can't blame em, after all, I'm not the man they married."
I think Rodney would appreciate transgender jokes.
"This gig, this gig such disrespect they pay peanuts they said they pay in exposure, I said that's indecent! All kinds a disrespect, I said fine I'll get paid in exposure and got a job as an adult dancer. Fired my first night, turns out they meant dance around the pole on stage not swing around the pole in my thong. I can't get any respect I tell ya."
"It's rough out there, the economy is rough. They say they only constants are death and taxes just to let you know what you got to look forward to, that's how rough it is. Just my luck, my name died and I still gotta pay taxes! No respect at all."
"They named me after my dad but he kept sayin I took after my mother. I called him up like hey dad, peer pressure really works! He was supportive though real supportive dad but even supportive y'know you get presents just like your parents' idea of what you want. I liked dinosaurs, got dinosaur underwear for a year. Now my dad sends me dinosaur stripper heels every birthday. He tries, the guy."
"I used to work at a bookstore, y'know, they got a self-help book for everything, find the right woman this, find yourself that. Look at me, I'm doing both at once. But listen, these guys all trying to sell ya self improvement. Buddy, I need self renovation. I found eight books on downstairs remodeling but lemme tell ya it wasn't what I hoped for. I can't catch a break. I got a ventriloquism book to throw my voice but it just came back. No help at all."
"My best friend grew up in Cockeysville, then he moved to Gelding Drive. I'm like buddy, you're over there livin my dream. Great pal, has a whole great polyamory thing goin y'know? He grew up and got a house with a yard and a dog and a white picket fence and a kid and two and a half wives. It's not easy bein polyamorous lemme tell ya. You go on dating sites they wanna know if you're lookin for long term short term, I'm like hey right now I'm lookin for anyone who can organize a day planner!"
"It's rough, this city is so rough you see the potholes out there? I cut a fart while I'm driving it sounds like a helicopter takin off. Even the mechanics can't help, the other day in the shop he was like hey for a grand this car could look and feel new! I asked yeah what about me and he said I don't do antiques. The doctor's no better, I went in the office like hey doc, how's it look down there. She said, gimme a minute, I never worked on one a these models before."
I'm too open, always talkin about sex and dicks, but I got no filter, see? The other day at a bar someone said "bottoms up!" so I climbed onto the pool table an asked where she wants me. That's okay, y'know, bein a slut is the best job ever. I get ta work lyin down and everyone calls me princess.
I'm clumsy too, you wouldn't believe it. I punched myself in the face tryin to open a jar of pickles. I almost died cutting myself with my own nails tryin to brush my teeth. I'm so clumsy OSHA put out a restraining order on me, I'm not allowed within 50 feet of heavy machinery. I'm so clumsy my doctors won't stop askin me if I feel safe at home.
cipher, i am literally begging you to put together a burlesque act where you strip out of your dangerfield layers while telling these jokes.
Okay so first, I have got my full Randy Dangerfield costume together already, I just need to practice a bit and try to figure out how the open mic stuff works because it's so confusing. Second, if we can afford it, my nonbinary wife wants to do burlesque lessons together. So.
"It's tough bein trans out there, real tough. We were so poor when we came out I hadda get a hand me down gender. My wife was like, I'm not using mine anyway, have it. You know, it's a little dinged up, needs a little polish and bondo, but it's a classic. So now my agender wife don't got a gender no more. Well, there's a gender on their drivers license, but they're non-practicing."
"Comin out is tough too. I was real nervous tellin my dad because he's kinda old, conservative. I was like dad I'm a woman and he goes Yeah that happens. Didn't even pause his dinner or nothing. I'm like gee dad I was worried I'd be a disappointment or something and he's like well I wish you were a lawyer but whatever makes you happy."
"Polyamory ain't all it's cracked up to be either, I tell ya, I got girlfriends in different time zones and enough money for half a bus pass. I tried to mail myself but the prices were still ridiculous. C'mon buddy, cut me a break, I thought you charged less for small packages."
"Bein a trans woman isn't easy, lemme tell ya there's stigma bein trans, everyone judges how I look. I can't catch a break with it, I complain to my partner, they're like, I thought you liked when I stigma cock in your mouth. Like, okay no I mean I'm stigmatized and my partner they go like okay I guess we can try it in the eyes too, if you want."
"I was never that well endowed, ya know, not on my best day, and you add a few years of HRT in lemme tell ya, it's like a retractable measuring tape down there. The other day I went to my doctor like Doc, I said, whaddaya think bottom surgery's gonna cost me. He looked down and he said lemme refer you to a dermatologist for pimple removal."
Sex workers are amazing, I tell ya, I tried it but I just wasn't organized enough. I asked a friend, they said "Have you tried spreadsheets?" Are you kidding, spread sheets is where the whole thing started. Then they said, no spreadsheets on a computer but how'm I supposed to use the webcam then? It's not for me, that's okay, I guess all my sex these days is between me, my partners, and the NSA.
I was talkin to my wife the other day I said, the only way I'm getting bottom surgery is under socialism. They said why, because of redistribution of wealth? I says no, because it's redistribution of penis. They said what're ya talkin about you're already redistributin your penis to half the trans community.
Polyamory's great though, it's wonderful to have other people to lean on. One time I went in a coma. My wife was going outta her mind til she could find one of my partners to make a "girlfriend in a coma" joke with. I love em all, they're great, all my partners, they take such good care of me, they do so much they unionized about it. Now anytime we fuck I get fined by the NLRB for union busting.
Dating still ain't easy though, lemme tell ya. I said I gotta great sense of humor, I get a message telling me that's good coz I look like a joke. But no, I do alright. I just got my name changed to Twenty Bucks, now I get passed around between every trans woman on the internet.
Something else I'll tell ya about polyamory, you work three times as hard at cooking, cuz everyone's got dietary needs and you wanna feed em right, ya know? I mean people allergic to potatoes, to wheat, to onions, all of it. Once I even dated someone lactose intolerant who didn't eat cheese.
Lemme tell ya, my wife and I been together now fifteen years and I love em so much. I love my wife, they're asexual, ya know, so don't let no one tell ya you can't have a long and loving relationship if you're ace okay? I'd tell ya more but I can't cuz of the non-disclothe her agreement.
Getting organized, it ain't easy, I'd lose my dick if it weren't attached, talk about a mixed blessing. Lemme tell ya, they say a new bottom surgery dropped, sure, right through the sewer grate. Now what.
But hey, you think I'm disorganized, guys out there, they go "whose dick do I gotta suck to getta table in this place, whose dick to I gotta suck to get a parking space, whose dick-" Buddy, lemme tell ya, if you don't already know, you ain't got a prayer. These guys, I tell ya. Not me, I got free parking everywhere because I know whose dick I gotta suck.
I mean, everywhere I go, girls, y'know we sometimes go to they bathroom together, girls like us. When I sit down in the stall, girls I don't even know roll up in the stall next door and ask if I wanna good parking space. I gotta start carrying a can opener everywhere for them metal bathroom stall walls. I tell ya.
My wife is so supportive, they're always lettin me try out new material. I started transition, no problem, they loved me trying out girlfriend material. No but seriously, we're a great match, I tell ya though, I think when the judge married us he was thinkin man and wife, not straight-man and wife!
Hey, I know what you're thinkin' - "Great, another transgender comic who transitioned for clout." It's not true, I swear! I only transed my gender to beat women at bowling!
Someone should make a disco elysium spiritual successor that takes place in a maze and follows a protagonist who has to eat all the dots in the maze whilst avoiding several ghosts
you can actually homebrew this in d&d 5e
SCROLL UP!!! THIS IS A PAINTING
Nobody calls each other “terminally online” anymore. I think that’s because everyone is terminally online now. Jobless too. And ugly as fuck. Stains all over our shirts. Stupid as well
It’s just me and my stupid clit against the fucking world
Pictures for Sad Children (2014)
123movies & putlocker provide more for the people of this country than the army has ever
At least the army doesn’t take the money creators could have made. And is also not stealing anyone’s content. ^^
they kill people
2014 average url: tumblring-in-the-tardis
2026 average url: weemp
Ok like. Imagine life without ads. You wake up, check your messages across a variety of apps, no ads. You get up and put on the tv while you prep your breakfast, no ads. Maybe you drive somewhere and switch on the radio, no ads. Maybe you drive a long distance, yet somehow, not a single billboard on your path. You pick up a newspaper or magazine to pass the time, no advertisements only articles. You turn on your game console, the home screen is just about your games, no ads to buy more. You open a streaming app, you don't pay extra for no ads, there's just no ads ever.
Think about how much of your time is spent looking at ads. "Download ublock" yeah I know, I have. But that doesn't change that the world is covered with endless advertising. Imagine never seeing that again. How much better our lives would be.
Christoph Steinbrenner/Rainer Dempf, "Delete!" (06.2005, Vienna)
Do you love the colour of the sky? I'm also in Ontario :')
NO ITS REALLY BAD!!!!!!!!!!!
the weather today is Creepy Orange
Text of tweet under the cut because it is loooong.
But... Stochastic Parrots.
This is the paper. It's excellent, highly recommend reading it.
I remember reading about Gebru's firing but I had no idea this was the paper she was fired over.