Do you ever wonder why we're here?

** Paige | ♎️ | 26 | Canada | she/her | demi **

[fashionsensexoxo]

do ur boobs ever just like not match your outfit like does that make sense to anyone else

[pukicho]

I'm glad electricity is a viable defense weapon here on Earth

[pukicho]

You've all forgotten about tasers

[whitepeopletwitter]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[tiktokarchive]

[ohrganizedkhaos]

[saucybrtt]

Shouto in a beanie

[joestar101]

aaaaaaaaaAAAAAA̸̛͚̰̪͚̲̙̲͈̹̠͍̳̐͂ͩͤ̐ͨ́Ą͇̭̞̬̞͉̦͍͍̘̲ͭ͌̔͊̉ͬͧ̎ͭ͒͗̊̓͑̌̉͂̚͜͜Ą̶͈͎̤̰͔͖̥̘̖̤͎͙͔͈̣͔̦͚̽ͣ́͌̕A̶̤͙̺̪͈͚͍̱͈͙̳̰̬͑͆͆͋̐̅͆̌̾̐̈́ͬͣͦͧ͐͘͝͝͠A̶̧̨͈̥͕̗̖͙̽ͧͩ̒͝͝ͅĄ̭̪̟͚̫̺̫̳͈͔̬͇̭͕͍̯̪̜͕̈́̎͗ͦ̇ͮͭ͗̽̈ͥ̂ͤ̅͌͂ͥ͘Ã̴̊̔̿̒̈ͭ̉͆͌̿҉̧̡͇̗͓͉̘̕ͅA̗̖̙͔̞̞̗̬̲̙̜̫̼̖̒͗͋ͨ̑̾͜͢͠

[baruchobramowitz-deactivated201]

Behold the most disgustingly aggressive display of Americanness

[this-sharknado-loves-you-deacti]

I’m just picturing some dude sitting at the dinner table, his assault rifles propped up in the other chairs

“Can you pass the salad, Mom?” he asks the AK-47, but she doesn’t pass the salad

She never passes the salad

[bureaubaggins]

“Hey Mom, can you pass the salad?”

“You always do this to me, Mom.”

[rinsbian]

[osarumon]

Fixed

[andhumanslovedstories]

A cleric who is the Team Mom and only heals by kissing you on the forehead and buffs you by licking her thumb and rubbing away some schmutz on your face

someone’s like “you know that’s not actually required for your job” and she’s like “shhhhh my beautiful child, my healing my rules, I made you a potion, it’s chicken noodle mana” 

[andhumanslovedstories]

Their holy sigil is a macaroni necklace you made in second grade. You didn’t know them in second grade. You’re not sure how they got that macaroni necklace. You ask them about it, and they just slip you a twenty and tell you to get whatever you want at the food court. “What is a food court?” you cry, but it doesn’t matter because they summoned a hero’s feast and everything tastes wonderful, and at some point you crawl into their lap to cry about something you thought you were adult enough to handle. 

“This is you handling it,” they say. “You’re never too big to ask your mom for help.”

“You’re literally not my mother,” you sob.

“But metaphorically,” they say, and you’re like truuuuuuuuuu and sob a little more before they tuck you into a bedroll because you’ve got a big day tomorrow stopping an assassination at a royal palace

[jeza-red]

Plot Twist, the Cleric is a 7'2" Orc bursting with muscle, with a missing eye and a necklace made of bones. The remaining eye is the most beautiful shade of amber, though and the Orc’s hair smells of lavender. When they hug you it’s like being hugged by Terry Crews.

[dankmemeuniversity]

[lolotehe]

[epic-games-official]

That's valid

[supreme-leader-stoat]

[spencerthespacer-deactivated202]

[usagichanp]

[supreme-leader-stoat]

[silentbutlively]

This completely destroyed me I can’t stop laughing

[itsvondell-deactivated20180104]

i want a shirt that says “eat or die” because at first it sounds rebellious but its just a reminder

[kallielef]

Fenris 

[sistertaxon]

is there any temptation greater than being in the hardware store and seeing the place where they have all the little cards for the colours

[zagreus]

as someone who works in the paint department of a hardware store i just wanna say that you are absolutely allowed (and ENCOURAGED!) to grab as many cards off the rack as you want so long as you don’t take more than one or two of each colour (they are free for customers but the store only gets so many at a time so please don’t just walk off with our ENTIRE supply of SW 7587 Antique Red cards)

[madmanswords]

That’s too specific. Have people been stealing the SW 7587 Antique Red cards in droves lately?

[zagreus]

legally i am not allowed to comment

[recoil-operated-deactivated2021]

I’m too cheap to actually buy paint so I’ve been going to every hardware store in collecting all the SW 7587 antique red cards and gluing them to my walls

[zagreus]

YOU!!!!!! YOU ARE MY ENEMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[ayumiko]