Welcome To Rage City

⭐️They/them ⭐️ ⭐️TAZ, Naddpod, D20 ⭐️the names Hollis ⭐️agender af

[gladehomies]

Freddie Wong.

If you’re reading this, we need to talk.

CW // abuse

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Glenn is an abusive dad. Maybe you never meant for things to shake out this way. Maybe you never even realized he was, but the truth is he’s abusive and you need to be careful when you tell the story coming up.

Now, I may not be a psychologist, but as a person who’s mom acts a lot like Glenn I feel I have at least some things to say.

Let’s start by talking about how Glenn is abusive.

1. Lets start with the basics. Nick should not have drugs in any capacity at all. This is obvious so I won’t really expand.

2. Parents who are only every their kids best friends are NOT good parents. Kids need rules. They need guidance. They need someone who puts them onto the right track and tells them what they need to do. Glenn doesn’t guide Nick at all unless it’s to “get tail” or how to smoke weed.

3. Glenn has treated Nick in such a way that Nick does not have his own personality. Nick has formed everything he knows and loves around Nick because that’s the only way he can get attention. He’s forced himself into a Glenn shaped hole. He’s not his own person at all.

4. This isn’t explicitly stated, but Glenn had made it a scary thing for Nick to talk to him about himself. The fact that he said everything was fine after being kidnapped. The fact that he smiled and said he was good with acid burning his skin. This kid is NOT OKAY!

5. Glenn can say he loves Nick as much as he wants but he never shows it. Not once in the whole series has he shown any care or love or compassion towards Nick. Not once.

Now this is all I can think of right now but there’s probably a lot me. Most of these just relate to my experiences so they come to mind easier.

As a person who deals with this sort of abuse every single day I will tell you this right now. The way that Glenn has not realized he’s abusive is harmful to me.

The amount of times I’ve seen fans say that “Glenn’s the best dad” or “Glenn’s such a good dad” and every time I question myself because you refuse to accept the reality you’ve created. You need to recognize how this is going to hurt people like me. You need to realize that you can’t fix this all in the span of three episodes. Hell this couldn’t be resolved in a matter of a thousand episodes. This is something Nick has to deal with for the rest of his life and if you treat it like it can be fixed with some magic fairy dust you are harming everyone who shared this experience.

Since I know this would be useless if I didn’t add this here we go. Some things you need to stay away from.

1. Do NOT have Glenn sacrifice himself or something he loves for his kid. Don’t even think about it. Not only would it not be true to the character you’ve created it would be playing into the idea that Nick has to love him because he “gave up something for him”.

2. Do not have Glenn apologize and then everything’s fine. This may never be fine again on Nicks side.

3. Don’t ignore the issue between Nick and Glenn. Nicks literally being abused.

The best think I can think of is:

1. Nick realizes he’s being abused

2. He confronts Glenn about it

3. Glenn registers it

4. (Depending on how you want to play Glenn) A) Glenn realizes the way he’s hurt and neglected his kid and commits to doing better B) Glenn puts a foot down and gets worse (really hoping you go with the first option)

5. (If you went with option A) Glenn talks to Nick and listens to him.

6. Glenn tries to patch things, but Nick reminds him that this will take far longer than just one apology.

7. Glenn actively tried to do better while acknowledging it will take time.

Now this may seem like a lot that you didn’t sign up for. Oh wait? You did. You made Glenn an abusive neglectful parent. Deal with these consequences and don’t fuck this up. Give this the same weight you would a Willy and Ron scene.

[gladehomies]

Sometimes you hand people a ladder so they can climb out of the hole they dug themselves into, but instead of taking it they decide to dig deeper to see what’s on the other side. Hope the dndads cast has fun digging!

[gladehomies]

Hope all of the people who replied to my neglectful Glenn post saying “just give them a chance! They’re obviously going to do it right!” Are really thinking about these past few episodes and how harmful they are.

[gladehomies]

Can I get a resounding fuck Dndadies Glenn Close? And from the back can I get a fuck Dndads too?? Because this newest episode really just showed how little they care about victims of abuse/ neglect and how little it takes for people to be won over. Freddie says one thing about “Glenn’s always loved Nick 🥺 and he only loves him because of Morgan 🥺” and you’re all ready to forgive him? Fuuuuuck this. I love knowing that dndads isn’t going to address the fact that they created a neglectful parent and then justified it by giving no evidence and pulling a J.K. style “but he’s been like this the whoolllee tiiimmmeee”. Where’s the evidence? Where’s the actual stuff showing that he cares about his kid?? You’re saying that Glenn choosing the win win of “oh I get to live AND I don’t have to deal with my kid anymore” excuses him?

[mspainttaz]

blup bloop

[i.d.: Three panel comic. First panel is Barry holding a bag saying, “Lup, love of my undead life, I have returned with the broccoli you wanted.” Second panel is Barry looking mournfully at a head of cauliflower in his hands and saying “But alas, sadly it has perished.” 

The third panel is Lup sitting curled up with her hands on her face, looking very conflicted. Behind her in red are her inner thoughts which read “He’s so dumb, how did I marry this man, it’s a cauliflower its a real actual cauliflower I asked for broccoli. He has to know right. this has to be a joke, right.” end i.d.] 

[foundthe8wing]

It sucks seeing people say the dndads cast hasn’t done anything wrong. It’s also frustrating, though, to see things to the effect of “yeah, there are some concerns, but you need to calm down/stop bringing it up/give them a break, because they’re clearly good people who are trying their best to improve.”

Because, sorry to be blunt, but: prove it. 

Show me the part where they indicated that they understand that this matters and are working to fix it. Show me what they’ve done with their discord server that reflects an effort to prioritize safety and accountability. (I’ve already explained why what they’ve done so far doesn’t cut it). Show me where they apologized for letting people sexualize middle schoolers (link 2) and discuss their own kinks in front of kids, and where they made it clear that that’s not gonna fly anymore. Show me where Anthony owned up to making light of sexual assault and tried to correct any damage done by that. 

I feel pretty comfortable dropping the assumption of good intent when the best they’ve offered over 2.5 months (and counting) is a couple of deck chairs on the Titanic adjustments, without any actual accountability or improvement.

And look, I get it. I really admired these guys. I get that having a canonically mlm character and acknowledging nonbinary people and simply having a party that’s not comprised entirely of cishet white men are things that make us feel safe trusting this group to care. I get that a lot of this stuff doesn’t line up with the image they sold us, and I get that as a (former) fan, it’s hard to come to terms with that. 

If you’re feeling more hopeful than I am that they’ll turn this around, and you want to keep vibing with their content in the meantime, I can’t say we’re on the same page, but I don’t have beef with you or whatever. Do your thing. But if you’re trying to use “they’re clearly trying” as an excuse to write off some very real problems or to attack the people calling them out? Fuck off. 

[staringatcandles]

when you fuck up, you have to actually say "i really fucked this up & it's on me" in order to be better. there's no room for projecting or acting like a victim. no room for excuses or acting like you don't care. you have to actually grow the fuck up & take responsibility for every consequence. there's no growth without accountability.

[faultlessfinish]

Hi, hello, I’m here to talk about people sexualizing Grant Wilson from Dungeons and Daddies and why it needs to stop. This post will include examples of people sexualizing a minor and mocking a gay kid’s sexuality, so heads up for that. 

He gets sexualized by people in the discord server, with no response from mods (unless you count “oof”). (Link goes to a compilation of stuff that includes, well, people sexualizing a minor.) 

He gets sexualized repeatedly in the show. (Link goes to a separate compilation of stuff that includes, again, people sexualizing a minor.)

And Grant’s sexuality,* when brought up, is often the butt of the joke (sources in same link as above).

There’s the stuff in a Talking Dad where Matt says that he found evidence of Grant watching gay porn on the computer, and that he’d “get into it - not like that” to “learn about what Grant likes,” laughing all the while. 

There’s the dad fact about how “Grant has never jerked off in that house” because Darryl cleans the bathroom so rigorously.

There’s the so-hilarious part where apparently Grant begged to get to watch 300 with his dad because of “the frickin hot dudes.”

* (I’m personally comfortable with “queer” but I know not everybody is, so I’ll go with “gender and sexual minority/GSM” for the rest of this post. You know who I mean. Folks who, y’know, know where the farmer’s market is.) Not only does Grant get more of this bullshit than the other sons, but he’s the only canonically GSM somewhat major character in DnDads (and likely the only one we’ll ever get), and that does extra bug me. Not that it would be okay for any of the sons, but it hits different, for me at least, when it’s Grant.  Time works different when you’re not the “default settings” for gender and sexuality. We fundamentally do not get to grow up on the same schedule of milestones – I think you could argue that nobody actually lives that Hollywood nonsense, but I know for a lot of us, it means being a lot older than most cis and/or allo and/or het teens when we first get the chance to be in a relationship, or it means it takes us longer to feel ready for that, or sometimes it means that we aren’t ever going to be “ready” because we’re just not into dating and relationships and that’s a valid way to be. It can mean that the person or people you are in a relationship with live really far away or maybe that there’s somebody very special to you and you can’t even mention that safely to your family. But then there’s this flip side of the coin where as soon as a kid is known to be GSM, some people (whether in the real world or in the stories they tell) act like that kid can’t be a kid anymore, like coming out is the same as announcing your intent to be sexual when sexual orientation and sexual identity are not about that.  We’re still haunted by all the years when the only visible GSM people on or offscreen were the ones who couldn’t hide it because their privacy had been invaded: the privacy of their bedrooms, and then the privacy of their deathbeds. So many writers still don’t know how to tell a story about a GSM person that isn’t about them being hypersexual, a victim, or both. I’m not saying healthy expressions of sexuality between consenting adults are wrong, and I’m not saying that harm doesn’t happen to our community, but we are so much more than that and we always have been. So for the minors that are listening to this show, so that you’ve heard somebody say it: if you’re a gay kid, you’re still a kid.  If you need to have a training-wheels crush on somebody of an inappropriate age, well, it happens, but it’s not something adults should laugh about or endorse. If somebody is getting undressed in front of you and you express that you’re uncomfortable with it, they should stop.  You don’t need to be interested in sex right now (or ever), and you don’t need to feel like you’re not “really” whatever orientation you are until you’ve engaged in sexual activity with somebody of the corresponding gender(s). The adults who love and support you do not assume that you choose your media based on whether it has people you’re sexually attracted to, and they don’t laugh behind your back about it. They don’t try to infer your preferred sex acts (through looking at your browser history or otherwise), and they don’t obsess about whether you’re masturbating or laugh about it.  Nobody should be talking about whether you’re “good, giving, and game” or whether you’re “into pain.” Nobody should be teaching you about BDSM and kinks when you’re 11-13 or however old Grant is right now.  I know a lot of the minors who listen to this show identify a lot with Grant. I want you all to know that you have all the time that you need to figure out who you are and what that means for you. Nobody gets to rush you, push you, mock you, make you uncomfortable, or invade your privacy.  I’ll be putting some resources in a follow-up post here, but I wanted to make sure that the above point had been said in this space. 

[faultlessfinish]

A few informational resources… The community at large:  - Lesbian, gay, and bisexual adults are at much higher risk of sexual assault, intimate partner violence, and stalking. (CDC) -  “As a community, LGBTQ people face higher rates of poverty, stigma, and marginalization, which put us at greater risk for sexual assault. We also face higher rates of hate-motivated violence, which can often take the form of sexual assault.” (The Human Rights Campaign) For GSM youth: - Depending on the source, GSM people are at 2-3 times higher risk of experiencing childhood sexual assault (a 2020 article from JAMA Pediatrics; a 2013 article from PLOS One).  - They also face additional challenges in reporting sexual abuse (all points below from the National Child Traumatic Stress Network’s fact sheet linked here).  • A lack of safe arenas in which they can discuss sexual orientation puts LGBTQ youth at increased risk for sexual exploitation and abuse. • Sexual education curricula often do not contain information about same-sex sexual activity. • Service providers often do not ask about same-sex attractions or activity, placing the burden on the youth to initiate this discussion. • Fear that disclosing sexual abuse (particularly same-sex abuse) will “out” their sexual orientation, LGBTQ youth often aren’t comfortable disclosing, or may delay disclosing the abuse longer than other youth. • LGBTQ youth who experience sexual abuse by someone of the same sex may feel shame or fear that their sexual orientation somehow caused the abuse. These youth may internalize negative feelings about their sexual orientation, causing them increased emotional struggle. • Youth who identify as heterosexual—or have not yet actively examined their sexual orientation—may think that being abused by someone of the same sex makes them gay, lesbian, or bisexual. • A youth of any orientation may not disclose abuse by a same-sex perpetrator for fear of being labeled gay, lesbian, or bisexual.

[faultlessfinish]

and most importantly, RESOURCES FOR SURVIVORS (mostly via the HRC) Let’s Talk About It: A Transgender Survivor’s Guide to Accessing Therapy National Sexual Assault Hotline – can also refer you to a local rape crisis center. 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) 24/7 or Online Counseling at https://ohl.rainn.org/online/ Love is Respect Hotline [phone] (24/7) The Anti-Violence Project– serves people who are LGBTQ Hotline [phone] Bilingual 24/7 LGBT National Help Center. National Hotline [phone]) or National Youth Talkline (1-800-246-7743), Online Peer Support Chat (https://www.glbthotline.org/peer-chat.html) or Weekly Youth Chatrooms (https://www.glbthotline.org/youthchatrooms.html) National Domestic Violence Hotline [phone] FORGE– serves transgender and gender nonconforming survivors of domestic and sexual violence; provides referrals to local counselors The Network La Red– serves LGBTQ, poly, and kink/BDSM survivors of abuse; bilingual. Hotline - 617-742-4911 Northwest Network– serves LGBT survivors of abuse; can provide local referrals. Hotline– 206-568-7777 And I’ll throw in the Trans Lifeline for nepotism purposes, but also they just kick ass. Never count them out, you’d be amazed at what they can make happen.  https://translifeline.org/  877-565-8860

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

TME means transmisogyny exempt, meaning you do not experience transmisogyny

tme people fucking reblog this i am tired of answering what this means over and over and over again

[lumchan]

got yelled at at work because my pants are ripped and my shoes are starting to break and it's unprofessional but i don't have the money to get new pants or shoes and my credit card is maxxed out cause my roommate and i had to use it for essentials for the house and we don't have enough money to pay it off 🙃💖 my half of the card is $295 and rent and utilities were due today and our sink broke. 🙃🙃🙃 i'm not trying to make this into a donation post or anything bc i'm too scared to just mostly ranting but if anyone wants to toss smth my way...payp*l

[sgrumby]

tall Lup short Barry end tweet

[anistarrose]

there was definitely one time in those 10 years where Barry impulse-bought a really expensive violin, because was so sure he knew someone who’d love it, even if he didn’t know who they were or even when he’d see them again. the next time he died, and found the violin he’d stashed in his cave weeks ago, he immediately experienced the lich equivalent of breaking down in tears.

[effable-as-f]

Tired: Rainer is a descendant of Blupjeans

Wired: Snippers is a descendant of the monster crab Jenkins summoned to kill them

[theheadcanonzone]

Barry HAS literally died to avoid confessing to Lup at least once.

–

submitted by Anonymous

[effable-as-f]

I woke up in a cold sweat thinking “Taako overhears Angus sadly talking about how he has no one to attend a parent teacher meeting at his new school, slow zoom in on his face as he cycles through several conflicting emotions and then smash cut to him trying to convince Kravitz that yes this is important enough to take a vacation day from his very important Raven Queen business”

So it spiraled and now I have an image of this scene in my mind where Taako and Kravitz are pretending to be Angus' parents and then Lup pulls Barry through the door like Hiiiiii, we're Angus' mom and dad, and then she's like ohh, crap, you guys were already doing that, weren't you, and then they manage to explain it away but then a few minutes later "Grandma Lucretia" shows up and then heyyy here comes Uncle Magnus and Uncle Merle, and by the end the teacher is just staring at her desk like How many parents does this child HAVE

[comradelup]

taako to the guy who likes his twin: *supports him, gives him advice, teaches him to swim*

lup to the guy who likes her twin: scORCHING RAY

[untitled55181]

It is midnight and I am bringing you the blessed image of Barry and Lup sitting in bed reading books while they hold hands

[lucretiaadventurezone]

*random faerun citizen after the day of story and song voice* HOLD ON HOLD ON HOLD ON...HIS SISTER WAS A LICH RIGHT? AND WHAT WAS HER HUSBAND? A LICH, THE LOVER BRO. YOU'RE GONNA LOOK AT ME AND YOU'RE GONNA TELL ME THAT I'M WRONG? AM I WRONG? SHE WORE A RED ROBE AND SHE CAME DOWN AS A REAPER, DOUG. GROW UP BRO, GROW UP.