I am the Lame Bisexual ™

[thewannabeee]

Fun Facts About Honey

- Honey is mostly sugar (WoW!) it is 80% sugar and 20% water (double WoW!)

- There are over 20,000 species of bees, but only 4 make HONEY

-Honey is the ONLY food that contains all the substances you need to survive (Including WATER)

-Children under the age of 1 should not eat honey… why? because sometimes it contains bad stuff called botulism and can cause them to get botulism poisoning (that sucks, even infants should taste the deliciousness that is honey)

-Honey will crystallize under optimum temperatures (this has a lot to do with how you store it)

-Bees produce honey to eat during the winter when there are no flowers and no nectar for them.

-A honeybee would only need an ounce of honey to be able to fuel a flight around the world (this makes for a very cultural bee!)

-A typical beehive can make up to 400 pounds of honey a year! (Wowza!)

[raygender]

This reads like it was written by a bee and I’m 100% here for it

[thewannabeee]

This is singlehandedly THE BEST compliment I have ever received :)

[imaginesharrypotter]

Harry Potter + Breaking News

Insp. (⚡)

[aquaheartgirl]

GUYS I FIGURED IT OUT

Okay so you know how in Beauty in the Beast…

This lady can’t afford six eggs, which always struck me as a little odd but I figured maybe that was normal in a poor French village. I mean, look at all the little kids she has; she probably struggles to afford any kind of food that would feed all of them… Right?

But later we discover something interesting about Gaston:

Gaston eats five dozen eggs every day. That’s 60 eggs. SIXTY. Which adds up to 420 eggs per week. No wonder this poor village doesn’t have enough of them to go around!

Gaston, who is very well-respected and successful and probably makes good money from his fabulous hunting skills, is cornering the entire egg market. To feed his addiction, he probably has to constantly go around and buy out every farmer’s supply of eggs, which causes the price on any remaining eggs to skyrocket.

Gaston is singlehandedly destroying the town’s economy.

Way to go, Gaston. You may be popular, but I’m sure that at least the chicken farmers were relieved when you fell to your death.

[dretanya]

[podcake]

i made an incredibly specific bingo chart about early 2000’s girl media and how almost anyone who has watched it in the past is some degree of gay. fyi, i land on all of these squares but especially edgy bitch. ♡

[gracelessdork]

depressed thot hmu

[bitchycode]

[nezclaw]

#she only needs to move one square to threaten that bishop

[babyanimalgifs]

Animal snaps

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

I like how the only reason Harry is able to fight the imperious curse so easily is because it hits him and he’s like “Ah I feel calm and relaxed and happy…this is wrong.”

[hummingirls]

harry: serotonin? in this economy?

[starboyfinn]

tchalla hacks buckys phone location so he knows where he is if and when he wants to beat his ass

[jazz-deactivated20170624]

he just gets bored and he’s like hmmmmmm bucky’s only two miles away frm me time for pain buck boi

[wereopossum]

forget the tony and steve man pain, i want to just see scenes of Bucky standing in the self checkout line with a loaf of bread and TP then suddenly tchalla is there throwing a shopping cart at his ass and they start fighting. bucky in the bathroom washing his hands calmly before tchalla kicks the door open and they start fighting. tchalla having a sandwich in the park until he sees bucky coming then he throws it at his face and then they start fighting.

[upallnightogetloki]

Bucky’s about to dive in the pool, T'Challa runs up, drop kicks his ass and flips out of the splash zone.

[sashayed]

it’s very important to me that sometimes t’challa is in a high-level but very boring cabinet meeting about grain prices or smth and his secret Danger Phone goes off and he glances down at it and then grimly says, “i must go.” and everyone’s like, wow. our strong and brave prince. off to protect Wakanda in her hour of need again. meanwhile t’challa’s just hit bucky barnes with a SPECTACULAR flying clothesline outside a Home Depot in bed-stuy

[drinkyourfuckingmilk]

[queerdungeons]

Some excerpts from my deep research into the popeye wikia

[queerdungeons]

yeah im sure there’s a notorious troll out there hacking into the wiki of an absurd old cartoon to make it slightly more absurd in the hopes that someone on tumblrs gonna notice. Im sure

[cheaphalloweencostume]

“the popeye wiki has been hacked” is really the funniest possible thing to be adamant about

[memewhore]

[adoranion]

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[gracelessdork]

the worst thing about this is I did a snjört when I read this

i am in public. i may die

[thesymski]

jk rowling told me personally that hedwig was the duolingo owl the whole time. anytime she’s not actively delivering a message to harry, she’s threatening people everywhere to make sure they do their german lesson. this is never mentioned because it’s not relevant to harry’s journey

[anarchetypalarchive]

so i’m currently working at a law firm and the other day one of the attorneys was talking to me and he mentioned that he’s “not very confrontational” and i was like you are?? a lawyer???

and he said “yeah but in court there are rules. i can argue with some shmuck in a suit in front of a judge no problem, but when i leave the courthouse and go home i’m not gonna argue with my wife about dinner. there are no rules in our kitchen. i would die.”

[martymartinloki]

there are no rules in our kitchen.  i would die.

[draumboosky]

It’s only a matter of time until someone uses a drone to kidnap a child

[draumboosky]

High quality addition to this post

[gay-tm]

[treefrogsoup-deactivated2026042]

okay, as a straight guy I have a complaint

[gay-tm]

[sleepycrow07]

So what do you call a group of women?

[gay-tm]

Friends

[sleepycrow07]

Then why are a group of men a threat? A group of women can be a threat if they wanted to

[gay-tm]

The difference is that women have to want to be a threat to be one whereas men just be like that

[sleepycrow07]

Not all men are like that

[gay-tm]

And not all bacteria are pathogenic but we still wash our hands out of fear of the ones that are so what’s your point?

[crimeshetyped]

^^^THAT CLAPBACK WAS VISCIOUSSSS

[mimiceon]

This guy came for Jameela and she fucking wrecked him oh my god

[vyrkann]

some other dude tried to be smart and she fucking wrecked him too

[its-the-fluorescentsss]

So I recently found my old computer and discovered the time when I was in 7th grade and recreated Twilight using some of my pets. Here’s the result:

Edward when he first smells Bella’s blood:

Charlie:

Carlisle:

Esme:

Jasper:

Alice:

Emmett:

Rosalie:

Jacob:

[gracelessdork]

this is the only acceptable version of twilight