collection of thoughts and blobs

25 / queer / trying my best

[happylilsheep]

sometimes the words don’t come out

[happylilsheep]

Fault Lines

I used to trace the fault lines back to him—

The man who broke us.

A cheat, a ghost, a thief.

He left his mark in burnt spoons,

in hollowed-out promises.

An absence that sat at the table,

Heavy.

Then the cracks ran deeper.

Through her hands trembling on the bottle,

through cries that split the night.

My small chest on her shoulder,

as if my grip could keep her together.

I thought it was him—

the villain, the storm, the strike.

But it was her collapse,

the flood that followed.

I blamed his betrayal for the scars:

The child grown in pieces,

the nights spent listening for her breath,

the stillness stretched too long.

Yet the weight I carried was hers.

Her despair seeped into my bones,

her tears stained my hands.

Her body—too heavy to lift—

became the walls we lived in.

Pain pressed into the air.

It splintered in my teeth.

A love so thick,

sometimes I forget how to breathe.

She was my only parent,

the only love I knew.

Fierce, broken, consuming.

She taught me to survive the quakes,

but never how to stop the shaking.

[happylilsheep]

i’ve been so scared to cry again because i feel like this time it might not ever stop.

[happyheidi]

𝗑, 𝗑, 𝗑, 𝗑

[happylilsheep]

one step at a time

[happylilsheep]

i hope the world blesses you for as long as you roam its shores.

[happyheidi]

[swearphil]

HEARTSTOPPER | 2.06 TRUTH/DARE

[feral-ballad]

from Anthology of Armenian Poetry, ed. & tr. by Diana Der Hovanessian and Marzbed Margossian; "David of Sassoun"

[Text ID: "I do not feel part of the world."]

[fluffygif]

Lots of baby goats being born!

[catberryjam]

Oh to be a badger in the winter eating some crunchy yummies and then going back to sleep in your little cave

[neonlune]

フタリ (Futari), by Masaaki Sasamoto (Japanese, born in 1966)

[happylilsheep]

he’s back

[rosacarolina]

[happylilsheep]

僕のいるべき場所は、まさにここだ。人生は予測通りに進んでいる。まだ何か足りないと感じることもあるだろうが、人生は長いもの。今、この瞬間、僕は安全で、何も心配する必要はない。僕のいるべき場所は、まさにここなのだ。

「You are exactly where you are supposed to be. Your life is going as planned. Even if you feel incomplete, life is long. And right now, in this moment, you are safe and have nothing to worry about. You are exactly where you are supposed to be.」

[happylilsheep]

allowing myself to feel even when it’s painful.

[happylilsheep]

some random photos from my old phone