I come seeking divination advice (kinda?):
I am pretty good at differentatiating between "what the cards(or other divination) are saying" and my "inner voice" when reading for other people. Its like my inner dialogue almost shuts off and and I can confidently interpret my divination when reading for others. Half the time, words are flowing from my mouth that I don't even register as my own until they're spoken.
But when it comes to reading for myself? Oh boy the self doubt is crazy. Especially since I've been working on developing my clairsenses for the past year or so.
Have you ever struggled with this? Any advice?
I get burnt out trying to commune with entities for myself because I am always double and triple checking my divination and struggle to trust myself. I always worry that "what if this is just what I want to hear rather than what's actually being said?"
Good morning! I have 2 suggestions.
Rubber duck it: Choose a little effigy, perhaps a rubber duck, and speak to it as if you are reading for it instead of yourself. Try to distance yourself from your reading and intentionally format it as if it is a reading for others.
I find this closes the gap for me by about 80-90%; it's not exactly like reading for someone else, but it's also not just me floundering. It does take a little practice but it's a quick hack if you can get it down.
Employ discernment later on: I think it is probably a huge mistake to try and figure out if spirit experiences and readings are 'real' the exact moment they happen, like you are sorting them into a permanent box of True or Untrue.
The spirits give you a patch, and you completely unravel it trying to prove it's part of whole cloth. Some information you will not have the context to verify until you accept it as true and integrate it, or months or years later when you get other pieces of the puzzle.
And then, if people do successfully put the experience in a box of True or Untrue, they may be tempted to switch off their critical thinking forevermore about that bit of knowledge. Which is Bad.
Third, it's my experience that refusing to trust what your spirits say, even if you blame yourself for the lack of trust, is deleterious to those relationships. There's only so many times you can say "I don't believe I had real communication with you" without there being 0 impact on your relationship.
Fourth, the more you get to know your spirits and your life is influenced by them, the more and more their real words will match your expectations. "Isn't this just what I think" fails to be a reasonable standard of discernment when you and your spirits are good friends who influence each other's lives and often share opinions and ideas. People often attract spirits with which they are compatible, thinking similarly to them isn't a red flag.
The solution, IMO, is to reframe spirit contact from "everything is false until I can prove it to be true" to "I choose to accept in good faith that it happened, and I'll wait to see if this pans out or not."
Ask yourself what the worst case scenario is for having false contact. Judge what you experience when you commune with spirits against reasonable real-world knowledge.
"I thought this was true and it ended up not being true" is not a mark of shame. It is a mark of someone ready to stop shredding patches, and instead start sewing quilts.
Your trusted spirits are assuring you that you can fly, that you can read minds, and that the police secretly work for you? It's safe for anyone to assume that they are not having legitimate contact.
Your trusted spirits are suggesting that an unusual spell ingredient would be helpful, that a line of study you've always been interested in would be fruitful, or that a strange ritual you've never heard of would be impactful? Well, what's the problem in just assuming these things are true, and going forward with them?
Just because spirits tell you true information through legitimate contact doesn't mean you have to do what they say. The part where you use discernment to decide how to integrate or adopt information into your life never ends. Therefore in many cases, it is beneficial to take a stance of good faith and trust, especially self-trust, in cases of spirit contact. Then, apply common sense and make your own choices about what to do.
Discernment is not best used as a stress test. Especially if you are testing a year-old sapling instead of a weathered oak. Trust and good faith are necessary nourishment; you cannot prune every time you sit under the tree. There would be no tree left. How would you know what to prune, if you never let it grow out enough to see which parts hinder growth?
I think if you took this approach, you may also find it makes spirit relationships less strained. At least, this was true of me. The spirits need space to take root in your life without hitting bedrock every time they try to speak.
Trust yourself to know what to do with information presented to you, whether it ends up being from true or false contact. Only then I think can you easily walk that trail long enough to figure it out. Guessing at the journey from the trailhead rarely yields fruitful results.
Try Consorting with Spirits by Jason Miller, it addresses my second point much more thoroughly, and I think the content in general might be very helpful to you.
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