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CONTAINS TLOU2 SPOILERS! sideblog! requests CLOSED <3

[heartpascal]

masterlist. . .

important: help free palestine verified fundraising a blog for resources daily clicks

PALESTINE LINKS — via abbyshands

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collection of my writings! more to come… stay tuned

alternatively, read over on my ao3!

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JOEL MILLER

▹ late spring, f!reader — you and joel didn’t exactly see eye to eye, but things have started to change, at least for you. [2.2K words]

▹ the gold, f!reader — you don’t like the person joel’s become. [2.1K words]

▹ i’ll be brave, platonic!f!reader — an infected attack leaves you fragile, in more ways than one. [2.4K words]

▹ i am good, platonic!f!reader — joel finally sees the darkness in himself reflected in you. [2.4K words]

▹ the crooked kind, platonic!f!reader — you were sarah’s best friend, and you reunite with joel years after outbreak day. [2.5K words]

▹ the tunnel, platonic!f!reader — joel gets hurt, and in the face of losing the only person you have left, something inside of you breaks. [2.7K words]

▹ to an empty house, niece!reader — tommy hasn’t been your dad for a very long time. [3.0K words]

↳ something is rotten, niece!reader — part two, arriving in jackson brings painful feelings, and even worse conversations. [4.0K words]

▹ so far from it, platonic!f!reader — you get yourself into some trouble, luckily, you know who to call for help. [2.3K words]

▹ all my faith, platonic!f!reader — joel and tess raised you, in a moment of anger, he nearly loses you. [5.3K words]

▹ if the door wasnt shut, platonic!f!reader — months of travelling with joel and ellie come crashing down on you, the fear is suffocating. [5.1K words]

↳ i would let you in, platonic!f!reader — part two, after being abandoned in jackson, tommy and maria take care of you. joel and ellie’s return hurts far more than their departure. [7.5K words] ↳ lock it when you leave, platonic!f!reader — part three, tensions rise in jackson, leaving you scrambling to find your place. [6.9K words] ↳ check under the doormat, platonic!f!reader — part four, settling down fully in jackson means new friends and more patrols. what could go wrong? [9.7K words] ↳ you’ll find the key, platonic!f!reader — part five, after feeling hopeless, you decide it’s time to heal [10.5K words]

↳ please don’t lose it again, platonic!f!reader — a what if one shot, the aftermath, set in tlou part two [2.7K words]

▹ the world is brighter, platonic!f!reader — joel is trying to be someone he’s not. [13.0K words]

▹ weight too heavy to hold alone, platonic!reader — joel’s life in jackson is much more complicated than he thought it’d be [4.0K words]

↳ hoping there’s somewhere to go, platonic!reader — you try to navigate life after the rejection of the only family you’d ever had [3.9K words]

▹ break beneath the weight, platonic!reader — joel struggles to deal with someone who isn’t as emotionally constipated as he is [3.9K words]

▹ carved over the door, platonic!reader — you’ve been hiding something, and joel finally finds out what. his reaction is… not what you expected [2.1K words]

▹ forgive the sea, platonic!reader — after a trip to the outside world, you come back different [3.0K words]

▹ when the sun goes down, platonic!f!reader — joel doesn’t talk about you, until he does [3.6K words]

▹ the sun was collapsing, platonic!reader — joel thought you moving to a college halfway across the country would be the worst thing to happen to his family [6.6K words]

▹ fight the tide, platonic!reader — you face the consequences of going to seattle, set in tlou 2 [3.3K words]

▹ i was born waiting, daughter!reader — you’ve been looking for your dad for as long as you can remember, is this really him? [8.1K words]

▹ joel’s place, platonic!reader — you visit the cemetery [2.2K words]

▹ name your courage, platonic!reader — you don’t like the blood in your reflection, joel wipes it away. [1.4K words] DRAFT — Newest Work!

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TOMMY MILLER

Nothing here yet!

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SPIDERVERSE

▹ is it freedom?, platonic!reader — after losing everything, you struggle to accept the one thing you needed all along [8.0K words]

↳ or is it loneliness?, platonic!reader — you need closure, and information. two visits kind of give you that [9.2K words]

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. . .check out howl’s song association!

and my platonic joel miller recs!

[heartpascal]

i miss yall i miss writing i miss the old times

[heartpascal]

i have written approximately 1,431 words everybody clap

[heartpascal]

i feel like this is false advertising. i dont like what i have so far and idk if i will finish it BUT CAN WE APPRECIATE THE FACT THERES WORDS ON THE PAGE

[heartpascal]

i have written approximately 1,431 words everybody clap

[heartpascal]

somebody make me profoundly sad and give me back my ability to write please and thanks

[heartpascal]

Please post all of your drafts I'm starving </3

one is posted! it’s very short but it’s out there 😭 i do have some other drafts that are longer and slightly better, but they do genuinely need some kind of ending cuz they stop in a completely random place smh

soon! promise!

[heartpascal]

Is name your courage’s title inspired by a song??? I immediately thought of “the moon will sing” by the crane wives lmao

omg yes!!!! a lot of titles will be from songs, i wrote this one so long ago that i couldn’t remember what song 😭 so thank YOU ahahaha

[heartpascal]

name your courage

▹— joel miller x platonic!reader

▹— summary: you don’t like the blood in your reflection, joel wipes it away.

▹— a/n: this is like 1.4k words and it’s shit, sorry!!! barely any joel interaction but it’s the thought that counts? (from feb’23, posted june’25 so go easy lmao) this was supposed to be a lot longer i think

▹— warnings: extremely unfinished, creeps from silver lake, reader murders folk (off page), trauma, dissociation, BLOOD, canon typical violence

MASTERLIST

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Life in Jackson had been something of a miracle. A working, living society that fought back against the Infection that threatened to poison the whole world, and the humans who had taken advantage of it in the worst kind of way. It was a safe haven, a little pocket of life that you had never known before arriving alongside Ellie and Joel, close to a year ago.

But it didn’t change you.

It didn’t change anything about the world outside of the walls, either. The world was still infested with fungus, and full to the brim of immoral assholes who would love nothing more than to tear Jackson apart.

You couldn’t help but remain on edge, even as Ellie and Joel slowly began to relax into the life of somewhat normalcy. Every time you tried to just calm down and enjoy life, you felt overwhelmed with images of people destroying this place. You were sure it wouldn’t be able to last, nothing ever did.

It was the reason you were so eager to go on patrols, to be allowed the gun in your hands as your horse trotted along the routes that members of Jackson frequented.

So it was no surprise to you when you saw the smoke in the distance, coming from a supposedly abandoned cabin. You weren’t sure who would be in there, whether it’d be Jackson patrollers taking a pit stop, or someone more malicious.

You had been grateful, then, that being in Jackson hadn't made you soft. Your guard was still present, still strong, and you were thankful, especially as you got closer to the cabin. It had become increasingly clear that whoever these people were, they didn’t come from Jackson. The windows were unblocked, and you could see at least three men inside, their faces angled away from where you were staring in.

Nobody in Jackson would be that foolish, you were certain. It was standard procedure to block entrances to wherever you may be laying low, not wanting to risk Infected or hunters sneaking up on you. That open window would have anybody sneaking in with ease, which was why you knew you’d be getting answers.

You had tied up your horse, then, to a tree just out of reach, giving her a comforting pat against the side of her neck.

The next moments had been a blur, crawling through snow and bushes to keep out of sight, all the way until you had reached the open window, finally able to hear their voices carrying through the air. Your gun was gripped tightly in your hand, safety off, and you were ready to shoot first, answer later, before you caught wind of their words.

It had you freezing, eyebrows furrowed, and you recall the way misted breath had left you.

“They’ll all pay, Sid. That’s what we’re here for, ain’t it?” One of them had laughed, and you had heard the pat of him hitting presumably Sid on the shoulder.

“What? You think those assholes are gonna let us kill three of their own?”

“Hey, that stupid girl killed one of ours first. An eye for an eye.” The first voice responded, much angrier than his first comment had been, and you had realised then that this seemed… personal.

“They killed David, Sid. We ain’t about to let that slide!” A third voice spoke up, lower and much more vengeful when he uttered the name. Your mind had been racing, going through the likelihood that this was all a coincidence, and that they weren’t here for Ellie. For you. For Joel.

You were climbing through the window before you could think better of it, boots thumping harshly against the wooden floor and drawing all of their attention. You had grabbed the nearest guy before they could even make a move, your gun pressed to his head.

“Weapons on the floor.” You had hissed, pushing the metal harder against the man you held as they hesitated. “Now.”

“Alright, girl, jus’ calm down now!” One of the men, Sid, you figured, said, nodding towards his companion and dropping his pistol and rifle to the ground. You had jerked your chin, and kept your eyes sharp as they begrudgingly kicked away the weapons, out of reach.

Your hand had gripped the arm of the man in front of you as he held a knife, poised to strike you with it. “I wouldn’t.” The knife slipped to the floor as you twisted his wrist, and he cursed as you kicked it away, towards the window you had entered through. “What the fuck do you want? Why are you here?” Your voice had been dark, full of anger and a not so subtle threat.

“We just want the girl, okay? She killed one of ours.” Sid told you, his brows furrowed as he clearly tried to repress the anger in his expression.

“Where are you from?” You asked then, awaiting confirmation of your worst fears. You had repeated your question when they hesitated, pressing the gun harder against the head of the man below you, ignoring his wince.

“Silver Lake! It’s—it’s in Colorado!”

Your blood had felt like it was frozen, dragging through your veins at a speed so slow it physically hurt. You had swallowed, something in your eyes setting as you nodded, jaw clenched.

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The wind had numbed your limbs as soon as you stepped foot back outside, blood drying against your skin in the harsh weather.

Your horse was exactly where you’d left her, and she stayed quiet as you claimed back on the saddle, making your way back in the direction of Jackson with more supplies than you’d left with. The ride there was a complete blur, something inside of you just as numb, though not from the wind.

Concerned voices reached your ears when the gates opened, people reaching for you as you slipped off of the horse, patting her neck before someone took her back to the stables. “‘M fine.” You grumbled, stepping away from somebody as they reached hands towards you.

“Are you hurt?” They asked, hands stilled in the air, prepared to reach towards you again.

You shook your head, something fumbling from your lips about going home, and you set off before they could question you further. The journey blurred together, just the sound of your footsteps as you looked for the familiar road that was Rancher Street. You hadn’t fully registered the stares on you as you trekked through the heart of Jackson, finally reaching the house you were meant to call home.

“Joel?” You called, stepping into the house, the backpack and gear on your back being set down beside the door. When he didn’t answer, you frowned, knowing he wasn’t on any jobs this evening.

You made your way up the stairs, avoiding the fourth step that creaked when you step foot on it, and looked through the rooms, one by one. When you finally found the man, he was hunched over his woodwork desk, his mostly-deaf ear facing toward the doorway in which you stood.

“Joel,” You breathed, something of relief finding you as you saw he was fine, just working away in his own world. You were going to say something else, but were stopped by the way he looked over at you.

“Shit,” He said, standing immediately and making his way to you with quick steps. “Are you okay? What happened?” Joel asked, furrowing his brows when you didn’t answer him, rather stepping into his arms and gripping onto him like your life depended on it. He held on to the back of your head, holding you close, and couldn’t help but frown as you sagged in his arms.

He called your name, unable to do anything but be more confused and concerned by the second when you could only shake your head.

It takes him more than a few moments to realise that the blood staining you isn’t your own, and that brings along another realisation. Your despondency translates what happened for you, so you have no need to fill him in with words.

This is something Joel Miller knows all too well.

The disassociation afterwards is a powerful thing, but what comes after that stage isn’t any better. There are struggles ahead of you, he knows, and he knows those struggles well.

He holds you tighter, arms firm around you, and waits.

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▹—taglist: @rhymingtree @sleepygraves @wnstice (everything) @auggiesolovey @just-kaylaa @evyiione @fariylixie0915 @faceache111 @randomhoex @pedropascalsrealgf @star-wars-lover @soobsdior @sunflowersdrop @definitely-not-a-seagull-i-swear @miss-celestial-being (pedro) please let me know if you want removing or adding!

[heartpascal]

el oh el sorry guys my great uncle died like two weeks ago, i’ll start looking at my drafts again today and try get something out for yall soon

[heartpascal]

honestly i have 40+ drafts (maybe like 5 ish in the 1000s of words) and ive kinda been considering just posting some of them unfinished 😭

should i post drafts…

yes, as they are

yes, but with a messy kind of end

no, dont bother

no, unless you plan to finish them 😻

Voting ended onJun 8, 2025

(should be said. some of these are like. 2 years old)

also lmk if yall want me to put up titles / summaries of what the fics are!

[heartpascal]

itdws fans … how are we feeling about seeing the mug FOR REAL …

(tlou spoilers below!)

[heartpascal]

im doing okay!! trying to get through my own finals 🥀🥀🥀 ALSO HELLO???? your essay topic actually sounds so good…. forget a fic. drop your essay.

BUT ALSO I READ SOMEWHERE THST IT WAS UR BIRTHDAY??? many moons ago…. do forgive my belated happy birthday wishes….. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! 🎂🎊🥳🩵 but anyway i hope your essays and whatever other work you have are going well. we’re all behind you and rooting for you!!

omg how have finals been going?!?!? sorry i know i am (yet again) late!!!! hope all is well .. especially with the finals!!! keeping you in my thoughts fr. ALSO LMAO HAHAH can you imagine.. sorry yall, my blog is turning into an essay blog now, forget fics ❌ (kidding)

HAHAHA thank you!!!! you’re basically early now!! my bday is in august 🫡 the 11th to be PRECISE. but thank you thank you <3 i am sending yuou literally all my love rn. I ROOT FOR ALL OF U GUYS I SWEAR. love u all.

[heartpascal]

my suggestion is to turn one of ur essays into a fic [agreeable head nodding here]

ALSO HI!! ITS BEEN SO LONG ^_^ i hope you’ve been doing well and taking care of yourself!!

agreeable head nodding is noted!!!!

BUT HI!!!! it has been TOO long omg!!! i saw ur user in my inbox and went :O i’m doing good, writers block aside smh. HOW ARE YOU!!!

[brainstorming ways i can turn a masculinity in captain america essay into a joel miller fic 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️]

[heartpascal]

please can somebody give me some inspiration for a fic or SMTH. i have nothing

[heartpascal]

I was trying to do hw and was like “dam I miss heartpascal” LMAOOO. Anyways miss you 😞❤️ lack of motivation is so real because I am struggling to even study for finals. Hope you’re doing well !!!

-🦊

omg 🦊 anon!! that is very kind of you 😔 i miss you guys smmm i don’t think yall realise!!! i haven’t been writing for so long (other than essays), hopefully the new tlou content will inspire something and heartpascal will make a comeback!!!

hope you are well 🦊 anon <3 sm love for u.

[heartpascal]

hi, hope you're doing great! belated happy new year, all the best! i was wondering if you're going to continue writing tlou stories? i love ur work :) have a great daaay

hi, thank you!!! i would love to, but haven’t found the motivation!! hoping that when the next season is released i’ll be inspired 😭 we shall see! but thank you!!! happy belated new year to you too <3

[heartpascal]

i miss u :(

i miss u too :(