Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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Misplaced Lens Cap
if i look back, i am lost
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
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JBB: An Artblog!
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Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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@boxofcards
It's always "how would this fat character be strong and athletic"
And not "how would this dehydrated skinny character even survive with the amount of physical exertion they go through"
My bf was yelling about how slow people were walking yesterday, and I said, "it's because they're so skinny. They don't have the extra energy to be walking fast." He about died laughing, but I stand by it.
Funny growing up in the late 2000s and seeing constant "don't text and drive" warnings, PSAs telling us to put our phones down behind the wheel, wait until you're home to send that text, a phone-distracted driver is a deadly driver etc etc
Only for modern car manufacturers to be like "we made the car a phone :) now you have to text and drive to change the radio station :)"
No, fr, because I have a rental this week, and I have to use the tablet in the middle of my windshield to change my heater temp and fan speed. There are 4 notifications that I have to clear when I turn the car on. Shifting isn't intuitive because it's a dial that I have to look at. The cruise control controls work funamentally differently than any other car I've ever driven. Occasionally, it'll switch between Bluetooth and the Android carplay or whatever it's called without notice, and I have to navigate the giant tablet to turn my music back on. The backup camera is poor quality and disorienting. My company gets me rentals all the time. I drive friends' vehicles frequently. This is definitely the worst offender, but besides Toyotas (they do have the tablets, but they're smaller, and the standard controls are all still buttons), I have had similar issues with every rental I've had this year. I actually have been having issues driving safely because of these "features".
The thing is, my brother has a vehicle in a similar category, same brand, just 10 years older. None of these things are problems in his truck.
My group has one female player and one female character.
friends, if I can give you one piece of advice for those of you who are new to work, or are about to enter the workforce, especially if you have any sort of office job:
Do not work on your days off.
"But--"
DO NOT WORK ON YOUR DAYS OFF.
Do not work on your breaks
Do not “answer a few emails” on your vacation
Do not work off the clock
Doing this doesn’t reward you with more money or whatever. It rewards you with more work.
Additionally: TAKE YOUR BREAKS P L E A S E
If you work extra you allow employers to pretend that the work can be done by one person, and that their hiring is reasonable. Ensure you are paid for all the work you do. Ensure enough people are hired to do all the work.
Overwork is not a virtue.
I've worked my ass off, worked overtime, worked insane jobs, and every time the rate wasn't specified, I made a huge stink about it. I refused to even pack my bags until I was given a number and an appropriate arrangement. When they got my checks wrong, I made a huge issue of it. Sometimes, I would remind them that I could and would go home "TODAY" if they didn't get me my money. One time, I did. That company loved me anyway.
If they're trying to get you to do free labor, they're testing your limits. Even a shitty company won't give up a good worker just because they won't do free labor. Answering emails off the clock is free labor. If you like your job, work hard on the clock, ask clarifying questions, and absolutely refuse to do free labor.
Hell, if they're asking you to give up hours to do a different job, make them pay you for the lost work.
Also, if you want something, ask for it. I've said, "can you get me to Utah once every two weeks?" And they said, "we can't get anyone to go to the stores on the way to Utah. That would be amazing!" I said, "I want to go to Arizona," and they said, "we'll pay you $2,000 just to make that drive." I spent the first 2 years in that company stressing that everything I asked for was too much, but when I asked, I was always ready to make a deal. I knew what I wanted and what didn't matter to me, and because I was willing to make trades to make shit happen, and I knew what I could and could not do from the jump, they loved me.
happy pride month to religious queer people, who feel like they’re contradictions, or told that they’re contradictions, but stay true to these important parts of themselves anyway. happy pride to the queer religious people who have to explain their identities, and who have to defend their faith or their queerness in either circle.
i love you, i am one of you, thank you for being in this community with me.
hey! you shouldnt make jokes calling cis people eggs, especially when they are real living breathing human beings with intelligent thought and critical thinking. if you do, you're weird and i think you should consider the effect your words more often, because as someone who was a very public facing cis person who had a lot of Egg jokes made about me before transitioning, it still makes me fucking sick to think about. it fucked me up so bad that i refused to transition until i quit my job and wasnt under the eyes of people making bets on my psychology. how dare you fucking speak down to me regarding my own identity. how dare you fucking claim to know me better than i know myself.
it is not the privilege of trans people to have their stated gender identity believed, nor is it a sin of cis people to acknowledge their option to transition and still remain cis. make egg jokes about fictional characters, fine. but accusing a stranger of not being the gender they claim to be is not something you get to reclaim when you're trans.
and no, i don't feel better about these jokes now that im out. you dont get to say "i knew it". that is the same exact thing, just played out retroactively.
very good tags
as a scientist i think that the debate around "does white people hair actually turn blond in the sun" should be put to a rigorous test where we control for all variables...like all these adults are going off confirmation bias and ingrained beliefs, so what we need to do is find a white person who has never been outside and put them in the sun for like, i dont know, 5 hours
intense scientific discourse happening in my inbox right now
Idk about just sun, but sun and chlorine for hours a day can definitely turn dark hair golden.
Okay, but like... they want the crumbs, and also, their own souls weren't big enough for the hate they have, so they hate you with both their entire souls and also the souls of the damned (which they have access to because of their deal with the devil), and they will do everything in their (shocking amount of) power to cause you pain and misery for at least the next 3-5 business days, given you don't have the misfortune of coming across them again in that time frame. The guy who makes statues out of molten metal and ant hills has the right idea. Send them back to hell, my guy.
The thing about reclaiming slurs is that once you've been affectionally called 'faggot' by friends, loved ones, and amiable fellows on the internet for long enough, you almost forget that it means something else to people who hate you.
Honestly at this point if a stranger on the street yelled "hey faggot!" after me, I'd probably turn around like "what?" like they'd just casually called me by name, and they were only trying to get my attention because they wanted to tell me something, before processing that they're being hostile.
The first time in my life that I ever really heard the word, "dyke," frequently was to refer to angle cutters. People have thrown fits over it being offensive in different companies, but tbh, it took all the sting out of the word for me.
It's the same concept as my coworkers, who had watched customers be sexist toward me, making sexist jokes on the daily. When it's primarily (and overwhelmingly) something you laugh about with people who love and respect you, it doesn't bite so bad when you hear it from people who don't, because your first instinct is to laugh and move on.
Hey kid you want a job?
Great get online and go to a job board. Indeed, Linkedin whatever. Now you're gonna search for a role that's in your city, fits your qualifications, and doesn't seem like a bad time.
See that easy apply button? Don't hit it they just throw those in the trash. Now you're gonna want to go to the company's website and check their careers page.
Oh? That job doesn't exist anymore. Cool go back to the job board and find another one.
Great you found another job, you're on the company's career page and the job exists!! So you're going to need to make an account on the career page website. They're using Workday, the same site as the last job you applied for? Who cares? You need to make another account for THIS job's workday page.
Now you're going to upload your resume. That'll autopopulate about 15 boxes with everything on your resume, except formatted wrong and with tons of errors. So just go through and painstakingly check the dates on all of that and rewrite everything you already laid out in an aesthetically pleasing format on your resume.
Ok time for the cover letter, explain why this specific job and company are deeply important to you. You love their mission statement and wouldn't even laugh if their ceo was gunned down in the street. You'll really want to reiterate the things you just spent the last 20 minutes filling out on the resume section
(Remember to include language from the job description, people who work in HR are lower than dogs and they need patterns or they get confused.) Write about a page, but hey don't sound too desperate or robotic this is where they judge your character!
Maybe add your portfolio site at the end here, who knows if that helps no one has ever clicked mine haha.
Anywayyy time to hit apply! Congrats! You'll see that confirmation email come in and you should be getting the rejection letter in about 2 weeks. Unfortunately your resume didn't have the right buzzwords and the AI auto rejected you :(
Time to start again and try not to kill yourself!
Listen to me
Listen very closely
The above is exactly why half of my friends come to me, and cry they're suffering, and I get to bestow my job hunting knowledge on them. I love this shit, it's a game.
For credentials my fastest job hunting time has been 1 week. I searched for 1 week, got an interview, and was hired within a week. My slowest was 1 month, while out of work, while telling ALL my interviewers that I quit my work without notice (I was testing my interviewers to see how shocked they'd get when I'd tell them why, anyone who wasn't shocked I would tell them at the end that I will keep them in mind (not)). My entire average is 2-3 weeks.
Firstly, what you're gunna do is pick a job sector. You're gunna pick a few of these by the end, but for now pick one. Maybe you wanna do bookkeeping, maybe you wanna do something in doggy daycare. Maybe you're a sous chef. Idk! Figure out what abouts you want first. Do not apply to anything yet. You're gunna look at the job description, I've picked out a few for bookkeepers below.
Now what you're gunna do is you're gunna look for "buzz words", or rather words that are gunna appear commonly and indicate the tone for that job. I've highlighted some, but not all in my examples below
Just look at that snout at how similar those descriptions are!
Now that you've got your buzzwords, you're gunna slap those babies into your resume! You see, since your resume is usually read by a computer first, you're gunna trick the computer into giving it to a person. Really what the computer is scanning for is how similar your resume is to the job description. Remember your bullet points, and to keep it short, try to only have 3 to 5 bullet points per job:
- Processed over 500 invoices a day in an efficient and accurate manner
- Curated reports for management review by utilizing available data
- Monitored and recorded over 100 submissions each day increasing accuracy by 50%
These are some great, made up examples I pulled from those buzz words. You might notice I added some numbers into there. That's something you'll wanna try and note for yourself, how much of something you can do, how accurate, how much efficiency you increased, these look GREAT when your resume gets past the computer and is moved in front of a real person.
Now you have your sector-based resume with lots of buzzwords. This is great! Now for the easy part. You're gunna channel your inner "IDGAF" And you're gunna send that to every listing you like on indeed. Filter for "Apply on Indeed" and spam that shit. Sometimes you gotta answer a few extra questions, but if they give me more than 5 quick questions I trash the submission and move on.
Don't waste your time jumping through hoops, streamline it for yourself and use the same methods companies are using. Push MASSIVE amounts of average quality resumes out. The more opportunities taken = the greater the chance of success. For every opportunity taken you've now pitched a chance of success, for every resume you cannot submit because you're piddling around on their stupid website or answering 50 interview questions online, you send out a 0% chance of success.
So go, try this, and see how it works for you.
Some additional things to consider:
- Add random shit in your resume, I added my "Board Game Club" (BDSM group) into my resume for hobbies and discussed how I got my start using sparklines there
- Never underestimate the flair of a little Clipart fleur-de-lis or something on your resume. Never put colored Clipart, but a little floral or swirl design located somewhere nice makes it stand out
- if you don't have a degree that doesn't mean they won't pick you, twice now I've come to a job without a bachelors and being honest that I was only getting an associates before I think of my next steps
- Embellish, do not lie. Jargoning your job description to make it sound cool and professional is GREAT. Do not give me a resume saying you can use CNC machinery when you've only used a 3D printer. Just tell me you know how to program and manage a 3d printer and want to learn CNC machinery.
- Keep. Your. Resume. To. Two. Or. Less. Pages. You don't need EVERY job, only the relevant ones, if your interviewer asks about the gap, tell them what job you had during that time (or if you wanna lie say you were taking college courses and were on a break, you dont need a degree to say you took courses) and that you only wanted to showcase the most relevant ones
- I'm serious on that last one I'll eat your fucking resume
HERE'S HOW TO WRITE A COVER LETTER FROM SOMEONE WHO HAS DONE IT PROFESSIONALY:
Look at the job description.
Identify what they want examples of like "ability to multitask" or "can work across teams to achieve success" or "can work on a budget".
Pick three.
Write this:
IF YOU CAN FIND THE NAME OF A HIRING PERSON: Dear [Name]
IF YOU CAN'T FIND THE NAME OF A HIRING PERSON: Fuck the usual salutation and just roll directly into "I was very excited when I saw this job application. I feel I am a great fit for this role."
Now, look at the three things you chose from their list of what they want. Write a paragraph like this.
I am an adept multitakser who routinely handles several projects/deadlines/needs (whatever). In my current position I [multitask example]. In my previous work, I [second example].
SECOND PARAGRAPH SAME AS THE FIRST DIFFERENT THING THEY WANT BUT NOT ANY WORSE:
In my current position, I work with multiple teams daily, including [name any team you have waved hello to in the hall] and through my work we have [list an accomplishment that required multiple teams].
THIRD PARAGRAPH HERE WE GO AGAIN:
Staying in budget is something I am very familiar with. When I worked on [team], my contributions [list] not only brought the project in on time but under budget by [number]. I have also brought in other projects under budget [examples].
AND NOW THE FINALE:
Thank you for your time in reviewing my cover letter and resume. I look forward to discussing my qualifications and interest in the role with you at length. I can reached at [phone number] and [email].
Sincerely,
[NAME]
And remember, any question that is looking for a negative story ("Tell me about a time you had a conflict with a co-worker") should ALWAYS be presented by you as "I do have a story for that, and I'm pleased with how I handled it." and then you focus on the all the positives in that situation. So, state what the problem was, and then how you fixed it, and then how fixing it improved your working experience. For example:
"Well, I worked with a man named Bob, and he never answered any emails he got after 3:00 PM, so if I had a question after 3, I'd start a draft email and just add to it if i had further questions. And then I'd schedule it to send at the top of his workday. He started earlier than me, and I'd usually come in to a reply from him with the answers I needed when I first sat down for the day. I actually had another co-worker who was having trouble getting Bob to answer questions, and I said, "Oh, are you sending them after 3?" and when she said yes, I shared my own process so it was easier for her to get information, too."
You see how you acknowledge there was an issue but put most of the focus in your answer on the fix? That's the sort of answer they're looking for. The "tell us about something bad at work" questions are about weeding out people who will take any moment to go into a full-on complaint about anything. Any questions that SOUND negative are about wanting to hear your POSTIVIE ability to manage conflict and difficulties.
I actually do feel like the "unemployed friend on a Tuesday" meme actually helps de-stigmatize unemployment because it frequently affirms that when you don't have a job you're more likely to be getting up to some weird shit rather than just lazing around. But I also feel like the unemployed friend is frequently up to some random shit because there's a whole pile of miscellaneous life tasks that full-time employment keeps people from. The unemployed friend is helping their cousin move, or babysitting, or checking in with a neighbor with mobility issues. The unemployed friend is a walking thesis on the inflexibility of our current labor landscape and just how much work exists outside of work.
I used to work a job that was non-stop for a few weeks, and then I'd take a week or two off at a time. For the off weeks, I'd altogether forget about work as a concept. The amount of times I was told, "No. I have WORK tomorrow," was ridiculous. Also, I was shocked and disappointed every single time. There were fun, interesting, and productive things to be doing every day.
Also, nobody warns you how much better life gets after 25. They warn you about the things that get worse, but like... there's so much to look forward to, guys.
got asked “why are you open on Easter Sunday?” by a very angry woman at work today…my literal sister in christ it’s because you are also here
if you think that god doesn’t want people to sell jeans today then ma’am perhaps you should not be buying jeans today
One thing the mormons did get right is that if you believe it's a sin to work on the sabbath, then it is also a sin for you to be the reason someone else has to work on the sabbath. I hold to that whole concept way stronger when it's about holidays.
I used to do cross country in high school, and there was this guy on the team that was wonderful. Great guy. But his advice to everyone that asked how to get good was to run 20k a day.
If you don't run, I'll just tell you, most people's bodies cannot take that kind of abuse. No matter how much you train, you will not be able to run 20k a day. It's like how you can't train to make your cuts heal faster. You recover as fast as you recover. So while a big part of what made this guy so succesful was the dedication and mental toughness needed to actually run 20k a day, an equally big part was that he healed like fucking Wolverine. And that's fine, but it would've been nice if he knew that and stopped telling new guys to commit suicide by jogging.
Different guy on the team ran like, 5-6k a day, which actually isn't all that much. His problem when he gave advice was that he didn't really get that 5-6k a day doesn't generally produce elite results for most people. He was lucky in the sense that he didn't have to work all that hard to get great results, and unlucky in the sense that if he pushed himself much further than that, he fell apart.
I think about those two whenever I get advice from succesful people. The very things that make them outliers also make their advice useless to most people. Worse, they're often outliers on totally separate ends of the same spectrum, so their advice will be contradictory.
One of my favorite authors talks about how in writing, any advice you get from a successful author is just what they did, not necessarily what worked. Very few people actually know why they're successful, but people generally want to help. So, when you ask successful people for advice, they'll tell you what they did. It's then your job to take that advice and figure out what works best for you.
if god is real then how come younger siblings can grow taller than older siblings
God must be a youngest child.
have you seen real snow?
yes.
no.
because apparently my friends said its insane I've never seen real snow. trying to prove a point.
please reblog to increase my sample size!!
reblog this rat until staff gets involved
