@here-we-go-all-over-again - Tumblr Blog

whose dumb ass idiot fuck idea was it to make medicine cost money

go to triple hell

Resteraunt servers have the funniest and most surreal workplace stories of any profession. They have the job that mean nurses think they have. The entire world is working against them the entire shift. And then you feel terrible for laughing. It’s not funny that you tripped and spilled an entire ice tea all over a toddler and the kid started screaming at the top of his lungs. Nobody was having a good day, thank God it wasn’t a hot coffee. That’s not funny. I did laugh so hard tears started rolling down my face when you recounted this mortifying ordeal though.

byjove

whatever you’re going through, you’re not them

contemptible-scoundrel

free use? *smirks snartly* so naive. you know nothing in this damned society is really free...

angel-advise

can't look up what snartly means because i don't have a dictionary account

chaoticgouda

escuerzoresucitado

shopwitchvamp

We need to learn from this. It's time for Beijing bikini summer.

carry-on-my-wayward-butt

“i also choose this guy’s dead wife” was easily the #1 funniest thing to ever be written on the internet.

carry-on-my-wayward-butt

you can know the punchline but you can’t stop it from punching you.

mighty-meerkat

i do also feel the need to add that phil8248 really liked the joke. he said his wife had always had a dark sense of humour, even about her illness and death, and seeing the joke made him feel like he was laughing with her one last time.

moonlitstargazer

noah-wyles

she's the best of us

that-house

I had to mentally send myself a reaction image the other day. I ran up the stairs on all fours, said to myself “i’m such a locationpilled scampercel” and then perfectly envisioned this image

that-house

please i've already hurt so much

nohoperadio

It sucks that there's only 20 minutes in each day. If there was more than that I would get more stuff done I'm sure

tinyyellowflowers-blog

Went to the grocery store with my kindergartener. We weighed some bananas: 2 pounds even. We weighed a watermelon: 4 pounds even. We weighed some mangos: a little over 1 pound. We weighed the watermelon AND the bananas: 6 pounds even.

“That’s funny” said the child “because 2+4=6 and two pounds and four pounds is six pounds. It’s like the same as math!”

“What happens if you add 6+1?”

“SEVEN”

“What if we put one pound of mangos on the scale?” <mangos added>

“IT’S THE SAME!!”

“OK, what’s 7-4?”

“Three?”

“What if we take the four pound watermelon off the scale?” <watermelon removed>

“Mama! Are you telling me math works In Real Life? Think of all the things you could measure!!”