Hogs Head Inn

But with a free dose of headcannons and shitposts every time you look at the blog || send me asks!! Tell me what you want to see more!!

[hogsheadcannons]

Sirius: I’m into dark humour.

Remus, turning off the lights: wanna hear a joke?

Sirius: I really love you...

[hogsheadcannons]

Hermione: you’re standing on thin ice.

Ron: I’m standing on the floor...

Hermione: its an expression.

Ron: it’s a carpet...

[hogsheadcannons]

Harry: do you like me?

Draco: yeah...

Harry, pouting: really?

Draco: you really think I would keep up with all your bullshit if I didn’t love you?

Harry, blushing: you just said you love me!!

Draco: Harry, we’ve been dating for three years.

[hogsheadcannons]

Remus: I know you’re deflecting by telling everyone how hot you are.

Sirius: I’m not deflecting, I’m a complete snack!

[hogsheadcannons]

Harry: what are you doing?

Hermione, bent over potions homework, sobbing: my best

[wizards]

scorpius: dad, i can’t sleep. there’s a monster under my bed

draco: that’s silly, there’s no such thing as mo- OH GOD ITS TEARING MY ARM! just kidding, he only eats kids, goodnight.

[hogsheadcannons]

James: why are you standing on the table?

Lily: I CAN STAND WHEREVER I WANT THANKS VERY MUCH

James:

James: where’s the spider?

Lily: it went under the fridge....

[hogsheadcannons]

Hermione: I mean, small animals are way more vicious. It's because their anger has less space to be bottled up in.

Draco: that’s ridiculous. Give me one example of this.

Ron: bees.

Seamus: spiders.

Dean: terriers

Harry: malfoy

[hogsheadcannons]

Prof. Flitwick: don’t talk down to me.

Harry: well I can hardly talk up to you. You’re too short.

[myqueernessisaquivering]

Scorpius: Albus is delicate. Like a flower. Like a delicate, damaged flower who hates himself.

Scorpius: Don't tell him I said that.

[tooobiyo]

Look at my puggo his name is Gus and he likes cuddles. He has an instagram

[hogsheadcannons]

My puggo ❤️

[hogsheadcannons]

Remus: Sirius passed a note to me saying ‘your adorable’ and I wrote back ‘no, YOU’RE adorable’.

Lily: and?

Remus: we’re dating. So far we’ve been on six dates and all I had to do was correct a mistake but I like him so I’m not going to complain.

[hogsheadcannons]

Arthur: *walking around sulking after visiting the aquarium*

Molly: what did you think a Tiger-Shark was, Arthur?

[hogsheadcannons]

*Potions class*

*An explosion happens*

Seamus *swatting the smoke aggressively*: IF IT DOESNT SET OF THE FIRE ALARM THEN IT WASNT AN EXPLOSION!

[hogsheadcannons]

Snape: *walks into a room*

James: why is he here? No one likes him?

Lily: be nice.

James, louder: why are you here? No one likes you.

[mischiefhasbeenmanaged]

*Jily’s Wedding*

Remus: [turning to Sirius] Are you crying?

Sirius: [wiping his eyes] No, it’s just eyeball sweat

[fanonical]

mcgonagall doesn’t give out her address to students because they kept sending her owls with pictures of cats with ‘hey professor is this you’ written on the back