recipe for success: 5 ibuprofen 2 garlic

Eden. 28. white. she/they. I love my wife.

[honeyedsidhe]

🥺just remember when you get mad at me this is who you're getting mad at

[girlkaramazov]

just helped an old old man log into his outlook account and we succeeded and he said “young lady, go in peace. we have accomplished this mission.” what an electrifying way of speaking…

[mousenemy]

[susandsnell]

no bc like a lot of you consider misogyny a joke or a quirk and not the deadly oppressive global force that it is, we all need to stop with the heehees and the hahas and the oooh romanticizing/sexualizing misogyny to cope~ hehe I’m just a girl about it like are we serious. Are we for real.

[zoazoaa]

If you are attracted to a girl it's important to show her sinister artifacts and relics

[handsomeboymodelingschool]

[opiates]

cats will be like please i need you to watch me wiggle around on this carpet please hey look look please look at me i’m wiggling

[honeyedsidhe]

I just had the WORST experience of my entire life 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[honeyedsidhe]

HEUGH so I was taking a shower and I have to take my glasses off so I can't really see and I thought there was a clump of hair on my foot which is gross so I was like ew and went to pluck it off my foot and and when I held it up to my face it was a CENTIPEDE. NOT JUST THAT though it was HALF the centipede. The other half was still on my foot. And BOTH HALVES WERE STILL MOVING and the half on my foot would noooot come off 😭😭😭😭😭 I am never showering again ever ever ever

[honeyedsidhe]

I would rather die than go through that or anything like it ever again didn't even finish my damn shower im OUT

[honeyedsidhe]

I just had the WORST experience of my entire life 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[honeyedsidhe]

HEUGH so I was taking a shower and I have to take my glasses off so I can't really see and I thought there was a clump of hair on my foot which is gross so I was like ew and went to pluck it off my foot and and when I held it up to my face it was a CENTIPEDE. NOT JUST THAT though it was HALF the centipede. The other half was still on my foot. And BOTH HALVES WERE STILL MOVING and the half on my foot would noooot come off 😭😭😭😭😭 I am never showering again ever ever ever

[honeyedsidhe]

I just had the WORST experience of my entire life 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[weirdplutoprince]

Well, well, well. If it isn't the consequences of someone else's actions that I am directly impacted and severely affected by

[fruitsoftheape100]

Youre Delectible

Youre The Womman Of My Dreams

Youre My Popular Pork Soup

Now Rack The Pistol For Papa

Ha… Good Girl

[kosmogrl]

[papayajuan2019]

people keep following me on here but they don't mean it

[iamoutofideas]

notice how everyone has to wake up at 4am for work now?

[chestnuthorse]

[phantomrose96]

job interviewer: would you be willing to destroy and betray yourself for nothing?

[phantomrose96]

job interviewer: (reading the room) would you be willing to destroy and betray yourself for a pizza party?