How Peculeah

Human who enjoys going on adventures in her mind. Word Nerd, Story Adventurer, Feminist Fatale. All content is my own unless otherwise acknowledged. Burning desire to email to me?

[ruinedchildhood]

[howpeculeah]

Resting Bitch Face

I have resting bitch face. So do most women I know. And let me tell you I quite love this phrase, this reality, the way I can utilise this face to shut down conversations with, or the approaches from, strangers. It makes me feel in control, powerful and kind of protected when out and about alone. That’s a lot to put on a facial expression’s shoulders but it’s how it makes me feel.

But RBF has a darker side that makes me uncomfortable. Because RBF only applies to women and the reason behind that is some sexist bullshit, let me tell you. There is an expectation that women always look good (and to hide their efforts to this end so it is made to seem as natural as possible. But that’s a whole other blog post). This is in terms of clothing, make up, hair etc. But it also applies to facial expression. When a woman looks anything other than pleasant and smiling she looks like a bitch. Never mind that it is simply the natural state of the face, with muscles relaxed and no hostile intent. The default expression for women is not seen as good enough to be the default. Instead it is deemed hostile, angry, subpar. 

These things do not apply to men. Their resting face is seen as normal, often being completely overlooked because it is so accepted and mundane. If it is noticed it is common for it to be cast in the light of brooding, thoughtful or in some other way a desirable asset. 

All of these things give me ABF.

Active bitch face. 

[howpeculeah]

Hi 2017

2016 was a hard year both personally and globally. I do not know anyone who had a stellar year at all and, while it can feel like at the end of every year people proclaim it to have been hard and terrible, I think 2016 was objectively worse than most. But it is over now and I could not be more pleased to have it behind me. Time may be an arbitrary human invention but we construct our own reality in many ways and the idea of a fresh start is always nice.

So for 2017 I don’t have particular resolutions as such. I am more leaning towards an overall approach I would like to take for the next 12 months. I feel like 2016 was a year I survived, that I passively took on, and that I reacted to. That is not in and of itself necessarily negative and I am profoundly grateful to have many it through. But it is not what I want for the coming year. This year I want to be active.

In many ways, if not every one, I want to imbue my life with the essence of active. In the simplest sense I want to move my body more. I have never been particularly healthy but the last 18 months have seen me slip into a new level of unhealthy. I do not feel good for it. 

I’d like to not only be more open to taking opportunities but actually go and make them for myself. 

I want to find a job I like, helping to make the world a better place. I’d like to volunteer more. To engage in activist work in order to apply my beliefs to reality and back them up with actions. 

Essentially I want to be more the master of my fate than subservient to it. I’m working on how I want to make these things happen but overall I just want to approach everything this year with a proactive perspective.

So 2017, you’re finally here. I’m so happy to see you. Let’s be kind to each other, okay?

[dashisgone-blog]

Rape is the only crime I can think of that’s 100% inexcusable.  There’s absolutely no reason for it ever.  In any circumstance.  You can murder in self defence, you can steal to help your starving family.  Even doing illegal drugs can really help calm people down.

But rape doesn’t help anyone except the rapist.  And it just baffles me to this day the way people will excuse rape with, “Well he/she was drunk” or “What was she wearing?” or “He’s a guy though, he probably enjoyed it.”

it’s the one crime that everyone should find inexcusable and yet it’s the one that people try to justify the most often.

[howpeculeah]

Introduction to Feminism

I have always had feminist leanings and always aligned naturally with a feminist perspective but there were several reasons why I did not start calling myself a feminist earlier. Firstly, I was so naturally attuned to these ideas that to my young mind they did not seem to constitute a movement or particular set of beliefs - that was just how things were. Time, discussions with others and exposure to their differing opinions ended that. 

I also thought that feminism was a movement that had happened. Past tense; was done. Some ladies burnt their braziers and fixed all the problems. Oh how young and how naive I was. Further, I mistakenly thought that feminists were man-hating, bitter, lonely old women. (I told you, young and naive.) This was also tied to the third factor, which was that I had never personally experienced any severe negative consequences of gender inequality. I know how terribly small minded and selfish that makes me sounds - and I may have been - but I mean this more in the sense that nothing happened that made me truly consider feminism. 

Keep reading

[howpeculeah]

Rereading old posts and this one continues to strike a chord. Now I am at university pursuing my honours, and I am writing about women’s rights. I hope I never stop learning, and trying to make the world a better place for all genders. 

[howpeculeah]

The Thing I Hate to Love

Bed time is a bittersweet experience in my world. On the one hand I do really love to sleep. To drift off into oblivion; to rest and restore the mind and body. And nothing really matches the simple joy of waking up from a good night’s sleep feeling completely refreshed. Except perhaps the glorious moment when, after the longest day from which you are physically and mentally spent, you get to climb into a comfortable bed.

And with sleeping comes dreaming, a double edged sword in its own right. Most of my nights are spent either dreamless or at least without recollection of any dream I might have had. But sometimes I do remember them. And I have had some truly excellent dreams. My favourites are when I dream up entirely new episodes of my favourite TV shows. It is like getting to watch TV and sleep at the same time, which is pretty much my idea of heaven. 

On the other hand your brain is the one thing that knows you best and knows your deepest, darkest fears. And, being the big old jerk that it is, can use this information to give you the worst nightmares ever. I have definitely had some of those, a few which are so vivid they haunt me to this day. Of course these are just the extremes, with all sorts of weird and mundane night time wonderings in between.

But the main reason that bed time is such a grey area for me is the unholy fact that, the moment I climb into bed and settle down comfortably, is usually also the exact time when I am assaulted with the motivation and inspiration to do all the creative things I would love to do. And I use the term assaulted because it is quite accurate. My tired self is jolted into wakefulness with an idea for a story or a painting. My fingers itch to pick up a paintbrush or sketching pencil or to tap happily away at a keyboard. 

This is yet another dirty trick played by my unkind brain. Because of this jerk move I am then torn between the need for sleep and a manic desire to make things. The heavy weight of the responsible decision to get to bed at a reasonable hour and give my body the sleep it needs presses down on me, anchoring me to the mattress, while the manic creative energy thrashes against such restraint. 

Bedtime is great when it is simple affair. The combination of pyjamas and blankets and oblivion is perfect. But too often bedtime is a sick little joke played by my sadistic self.

[howpeculeah]

The other week I decided to do a little baking experiment and whip up a cake flavoured like one of my favourite teas. I didn’t follow a recipe or measure anything carefully. I just used what I had on hand and winged it. The cake turned out really well so I thought I would share the recipe with you, dear ol’ blog.

This is very rough so feel free to eyeball it, adapt it and basically do whatever you want. Without further ado I present to you…

French Earl Grey Tea Cake!

Ingredients 

Cake

2-2.5 cups of self raising flour

1-1.5 cups of sugar (I used a mix of raw and brown sugars just because)

60ish grams of melted butter (can substitute this with coconut oil)

1-1.5 cups of your favourite tea, strongly brewed

A splash of vanilla essence if that is your jam

Icing

A butt-tonne of icing sugar

Some more of the tea

A lil cheeky spoonful of butter

Method

Preheat oven to around 190 degrees celsius.

Combine all ingredients in a bowl.

Stir it up ‘til it has a nice consistency.

Taste a little to see how it is.

Adjust tea/sugar/flour levels accordingly.

Pour in a lined or well greased cake tin.

Bake for around 20-25 minutes.

Let cool.

Ice.

Eat.

Be happy.

[howpeculeah]

Dark & Recreation? Welcome to Pawnee?

Okay so I am not much one for fan fiction or fan conspiracies (not that I have a problem with either - I just usually don’t write any) but I was listening to Welcome to Night Vale the other night and I was struck by the parallels to Parks & Rec. 

Here are just a few points that sprang to mind:

Night Vale = Pawnee, Desert Bluffs = Eagleton 

Which would make Cecil Leslie & Carlos Ben (overly passionate community supporter and more reserved nerd? It works!) 

Librarians being demonised and the library being a scary, no good place? CHECK

And April as an intern in both worlds is something I have absolutely no trouble seeing at all.

Jerry’s bumbling nature definitely sounds like it could fit right in. JERRY GERGICHHHHH (a la Steve Carlsberg?)

Sweetums definitely has a Strexcorp kind of vibe to it.

What do you think? Is it all in my head or could this actually kind of work?

[howpeculeah]

Just a quick update on this little old neglected blog: I read quite a lot and fairly widely. But I am always seeking to expand my brain and introduce it to new things so with that in mind I compiled this mini reading challenge the other week. I already have a reading challenge for the year (which is to read at least 42 new books in 2015) but I thought this would broaden it a little. * the picture is from my list of categories and possible titles to read within them that I mocked up in my bullet journal.

[howpeculeah]

Daily Haiku

Sorkin’s words fill me with a patriotism  for a foreign land. 

(Today it is nice and wintery here so I am having a date with The West Wing)

[howpeculeah]

It is September 2015 and almost summer-y warm but I am embarking on yet another West Wing rewatch and I just finished the Let Bartlet Be Bartlet episode which reminded me of this long ago written haiku. Enjoy that long sentence.

[howpeculeah]

The Art Assignment - Embarrassing Object

And now, to double down on the embarrassment, a poem:

Oh function of body, my uterine foe.

The scarlet rivers of battle do flow.

For life is just a house of cards; ever bordering a tumble.

Made harder when you pay a visit but god forbid I grumble.

And to cope with your wounding ways,

I am granted meagre weapons as this sculpture displays.

Not only are these nappy pads inordinately expensive,

but their array of fluro colours is visually offensive.

Further, adding insult to injury,

they are marketed with ads that are a sight to see. 

They show a world of endless laughter and white linen

used by swimming, dancing, vaguely cultish white women.

The failure to acknowledge the harsh reality

of pain and daggy underwear is infuriating as can be.

On top of this list of gripes, which is far from complete,

you are a topic quite taboo: the cherry on this monthly treat.

Whether it is from fiery rage or embarrassment at your mention,

you are the cause of numerous blushes and bones of contention.

[thelandofmaps]

A long road trip: from Perth, WA to the nearest city with a population > 100,000 (Darwin, NT). The equiv. of driving from San Diego to Winnipeg! CLICK HERE FOR MORE MAPS! thelandofmaps.tumblr.com

[howpeculeah]

Ah yes. My town is rather far away from, well, everything.

[howpeculeah]

What can I say? It's been a very long day.

[howpeculeah]

I went to the beach and climbed on big rocks and collected pretty shells and sea glass. I felt about 5 years old again. It was great.

[howpeculeah]

My room in my new apartment has been feeling a little barren because most of my cosy/decorating efforts have been directed to the living area.

But I've been gradually making the bedroom a space I love too so here are a few pictures.

[howpeculeah]

I started a bullet journal about a fortnight ago. The flexibility & simplicity of the system appealed to me so I thought I would give it a go. So far I am really enjoying it but it is still early days yet. I am contemplating writing a few more detailed and specific posts about the particular things I have adopted into my version of this. We shall see. For now have a some pictures from my time spent with this gorgeous notebook this weekend.

[howpeculeah]

I went hiking today with my friends. We saw/climbed on a lot of rocks. It was pretty excellent.