imliterallybatman.

[iamlituhrallybatman]

DID YOU GUYS KNOW BROODING HEN WILL ACCEPT ALMOST ANY EGG TO HATCH?! THAT'S SO CUTE.

That's some Batman type shit. Bruce is brooding (hehe, get it?) on his gargoyle and sees a kid and goes "mine" and when he gets the kid, he forgets it isn't actually his. He doesn't care where the kids came from or if it's his, he is claiming it as his. Same applies to Damian, btw. Talia came and dropped him off and was like "This kid is yours." It doesn't matter that Damian looks more like Talia than him, Bruce frankly couldn't care less. Before he even confirmed Damian was his kid, he integrated him into his life. Now he has all these little birds (some could say Robins?) under his wings, and he is a content mother hen.

[iamlituhrallybatman]

Bruce needed a break.

He'd worked on one damn case for nearly a month, and he's drained. Gone are the days where he'd push through, insisting Gotham needed him. Why else would he form an army of children if not the give them the keys and let them have a field day.

Bruce owns a 2-story lakehouse on one of Metropolis' many islands. Did he originally buy it so that Luthor couldn't? Yes. But now, it seems like the perfect vacation spot to settle and unwind for a week or two. He asked Alfred to accompany him, to which the butler reminded him of the hell that would break loose if he did.

It was the perfect time, truly. The sun was no too hot but warm enough for a good tan. The lakehouse didn't need much of a cleanup, and there were plenty of books to entertain. What's more is that the water was almost clear this time of year, enticing in every aspect.

Bruce tugs on his swimming briefs and, after a quick sunbathing session, walks down the dock. He sits at its edge, dipping his toes in the cool water with a sigh. This was the life. If he didn't have to do Batman stuff, this is where he'd be, 365 days a year.

He had to give it to Metropolis, their weather was-- what was that? Bruce scrambles to look over the dock's edge but is met with his own reflection is the clear water. Bruce swears he felt something brush against his foot, something solid.

Maybe that's enough of the water for today. He'd come back tomorrow, maybe go for a swim. He'd just answer emails for the rest of the day.

As he walked back to the house, he failed to turn and spot the pair of sky blue eyes watching him, the being's fins trilling softly, stirring the water, captivated by him.

-

Kal had always been attracted to pretty things. It is in his nature. He has observed it in humans too. When he'd been in that terrible aquarium, tight cage and stale food, he'd always been the center of attention : Metropolis' biggest merman. He'd spent his earliest days being cared for by a couple, who raised him to be nice to humans, but he was only ever nice with them. His fierce protectiveness over Martha and Jonathan Kent had resulted in 2 employees being hurt. That was when they decided Kal was too big to continue caring for.

With no preparation or easing into, they released Kal into the wild, inviting hundreds to view the programme. Kal had been excited to explore the new waters, yes, but when he returned to where they'd released him, he was alone.

He roamed the waters, made friends with beings in water, even other merman and mermaids, but he never truly belonged. Even Atlantis, as welcoming as they'd been, had not been the right fit.

He found a lovely island to stay close to. It was secluded but the shore was sandy, no rocks to cut himself against. He could shuffle onto it and relax for a few hours before dipping back into the water. That's become his new life.

Until he heard noises one day, from the house a small distance from his favorite resting place. His sensitive ears picked up on footsteps and words similar to what Martha and Jonathan spoke. He'd not learned much of the language; just enough to entertain.

It took a few hours of waiting before the human finally emerged. A beautiful human. Kal gaped in awe as the man laid down on the sand, right where Kal always did. Skin as pale as the moon, hair black as stones yet shining in the sun, hands smaller than Kal's splayed out at his sides. Kal felt his tail wiggle in excitement under the water.

When the man got up to walk down the dock, Kal hid under it. He could only resist for so long, and when the man dipped his feet into the water, Kal reached out. The skin looked so soft, Kal yearned to feel it. The moment he did, the feet disappeared. Soon after, so did the man.

Kal didn't dare follow. He watched from where he could, waiting. He wanted this man, as his mate. He yearned. He would not give up so easily.

[iamlituhrallybatman]

why is animal hospital and it's fandom so insanely addicting?

[iamlituhrallybatman]

Damian likes animals. That's no secret, but he's been in a bit of a horse phase this season. His socials are flooded with horse videos and he's in love. He wants to see these beauties himself.

But he would rather die than go to a rigged horse race where bets are placed and horses are abused for some easy cash. He would never support that cause and is writing his science fair project on the impact of tranquilizers and steroids on a horse's body.

In the meantime, however, he finds a ranch in Smallville, Texas. Locally raised horses who race and live in paradise, taken care of well and treated right, loved by the entire town.

What else was Damian to do but paste posters and notes of this place all over the Manor for his father to find?

Enter Bruce Wayne, only 32 when he came to meet Damian (yes, younger Bruce Wayne, surprise surprise), and he's barely had the kid 2 years when this pops up. He would never say no to that face, but if he could, Damian's passion about it is more than enough to concede.

Suddenly, they're in Smallville for a week, seeing horses and waiting for the local derby to take place. At the Ranch, Damian meets Jon Kent, a boy around his age who helps in the stables and taking care of the horses. Immediate best friends, united by their shared love for animals.

Bruce sticks out like a sore thumb, in his pressed shirt and slacks. Yes, he wore sunglasses inside like a douchebag but he has eyebags for days, excuse him.

"And what do you do with the older horses?" Damian has his little notebook out, scribbling down everything Jon says. He glares at Bruce when he suggests just using his phone.

"Oh, well, those we send to the farms round here," Jon smiles, his upper canine missing. "We have bout 4 on our own farm."

"You have a farm?" Bruce asks, feeling proud of how Damian is so entranced in the topic and wanting to chip in himself.

"Sure do. It's a bit far from here but it's got acres for these horses to spend their days." Jon looks around, seemingly trying to spot someone. "My pa owns it ever since my Grandpa handed it over to him, he loves talking about it." Jon's eyes light up when looking over Bruce’s shoulder.

Bruce turns and locks eyes with a 6 foot 5, built like a brick house, tanned and slightly sweating man, greying at the temples and crows feet near his eyes. Holy... Cow?

The man walks over, offering a pleasant smile at Bruce - one you offer strangers you pass by. "Jon, there you are." He drops 2 hay bales beside the boy. "Take this over the the stables, will ya?"

"Pa, meet Damian, my new friend!" Jon points at Damian. "And his dad.. Er, Brick?"

"Bruce," Bruce smiles, holding out his hand.

Clark nods, "Pleasure to meet ya, Bruce. I'm Clark, Clark Kent."

Clark Kent, a fine man, and a contestant of the derby.

Oh, Lord, have mercy, this man looks exquisite on a horse. Sleeves rolled up, large hand petting the horse's mane as he whispers sweet words of encouragement in its ears as he guides it through the track. His sweet voice as he gently takes care of the older horses. The veins in his forearms as he lifts the smaller horses or treats the ones who are injured. His fierce protectiveness over his ranch.

It's really hot and Bruce is trying really hard not to act on his desires. Which is much easier when Clark finds out Bruce is billionaire Bruce Wayne and suddenly, he feels like Bruce is trying to win him over and buy his farm from him.

idea cam to me after reading this post by @superman-creampieing-batman but less horny (for now)...

[iamlituhrallybatman]

I would love a superbat that deep dives into Kryptonian culture.

Of course, we have the starter pack : Bruce learning Kryptonian (or Kryptonese for some people...), or even both of them learning it together.

The basic pack : Both of them dipping their toes into Kryptonian wear/clothing and artifacts. Think tunics, robes, chains. I also really love the idea of headpieces and body paint, maybe certain weapons as well. Not all the time, but they indulge in the Fortress.

The premium pack : Kryptonian behaviors. Like mating cycles, family acceptance, introductions to packs, bonding, acts of appreciation or acceptance or forgiveness. Courting mates or comforting children. Anything from touching foreheads together or prolonged contact to chases and cuddling. Maybe even couples dances. Picture it, the Fortress playing a video of Jor and Lara dancing together and Bruce sees how elegant it is and how much Clark treasures it and goes, "wanna do it?". Cue both of them laughing as they trip over their own feet trying to get it right. And when they finally do, Kryptonian music plays in the background as they stare into each other's eyes (AHAHAH)

I just love how a lot of Krypton's heritage and lifestyle was left up to interpretation and how much can be used in ships like superbat.

[iamlituhrallybatman]

I love scenarios of Bruce not ever trying to flirt, he's asking a genuine question, but he's so hot, it works.

Bruce is wearing a tight suit, taut across his chest and tapering down his waist. Clearly he's put on some weight, Duke however insists it's all muscle since he'd lost some over his 2 week long bed rest.

"Hey, Clark?"

"Yeah, bab-- holy cow."

Bruce winces, looking back down. "Is it too much? These were my measurements a couple months ago but I think I've put on some weig-"

*there goes my baby~* plays as Clark slides to his knees in front of Bruce, reaching for his thighs and nuzzling his hip.

"Please, I beg, never change."

"Clark, what on earth are you doing?"

"I'm just a man," Clark sniffs dramatically, turning on the puppy eyes and looking up at Bruce, his chin resting against Bruce's pelvis. "Begging his lover to never lose weight because he looks absolutely divine and said man is in awe of how he managed to score such a ethereal being as his partner."

Bruce stares at him and sighs. "OK, get on the bed," he says as he begins loosening his tie.

[iamlituhrallybatman]

Flew down the rabbit hole of OCD. And I'm a PE student. Ah, yes, my love for a fictional character - Bruce Wayne - has once again made me dig myself deeper into something that in no way concerns me. I love researching for fics.

[iamlituhrallybatman]

scenario for this post!

Bruce is on opiods. Big shocker there. His body is still adapting to throwing himself face first into every fight and Alfred doesn't shy away from a sterm scolding as he gives Bruce's painkillers and stitches him up.

Is it an addiction? No. But Bruce is heavily reliant in them. He keeps a few with him at all times.

Clark finds out. Bruce hasn't lined his suit of belt with elad yet, so Clark knows exactly who he is and what he's carrying. And he sees the opiods, always full, never low. He sees Bruce popping some when he's in pain or he's masking an injury. It's cute how he tries to pretend he isn't hurt amongst the League because they might think of him as weak. This is perfect.

Bruce is surprised when an emergency JL meeting is called and his request is demanded. He's nervous, that's for sure but he isn't going to go like a coward.

"Bruce," Diana's voice is firm, but her eyes are sharp, assessing. "Anything you want to admit before we start this session?" Bruce takes note of how her hand tightens around her lasso.

Bruce looks around. Everyone is glaring at him in... Disappointment? Did he do something wrong? Even Clark looks unsure.

"If I knew what this was about, maybe I could? But if you insist on keeping me in the dark, I'm not sure how I can help you out here."

"Don't play dumb, Bats. Doesn't look good on you." Hal says, standing up. "Are you on drugs?"

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me." Hal eyes him. "I get you have your injuries, and you need painkillers. But someone told us you've been dealing our drugs to younger members for their injuries."

"That's absurd, I would never--"

"Batman," Superman says softly. Bruce's eyes instinctively snap to his for reassurance. "It's OK. We'll investigate the claims. We just wanted your side of the story first."

Bruce insists that he is addicted to or dealing drugs to anyone. The League is skeptical.

"We'll search your quarters and locker if you don't mind," Diana says. "We can never be too sure."

Bruce wants to protest but he understands. He wants to protect his privacy, but if he found out his colleague was exploiting Dick's pain for a quick cash grab, he'd be rightfully furious too.

What he doesn't - and never could - expect was to come face to face with his locker full of opiods.

The case is filed, Bruce is suspended from the League, they're all pissed at him, and they don't contact him at all while they look into it. Bruce shouldn't be affected by this, but it weighs on his mind. He's not a pedaller.

So he's more than a little relieved when Clark shows up at door to lend a shoulder to cry on.

[iamlituhrallybatman]

While i personally believe bruce is a great cook, there are funny scenarios of when he can't.

bruce has a very fixed mindset. Careful of his calories, making sure his body get all the energy and nutrients it need to be at its peak level. He can't cook for crap thhough and has a diet fixed on survival and optimum output.

then he starts dating a clark kent, who snack on uranium and eats rocks for fun.

Clark : Wow, this tastes amazing! What'd you use to get that texture?

Bruce : ... 400 degrees for 2 hours...

Clark : It tastes great! You gotta give me the recipe. I'll ask Ma to make it and-

bruce : Clark, the smoke detector is blaring...and the sprinklers have gone off.

[guerrillatech]

[utah-mountain-drifter-deactivat]

[poorghost]

no one follows the trees warning

[rapidashrider]

You know the parable about how the foolish man built his house upon sand and the wise man built his house upon rock and it’s always about having a sturdy foundation well there is also the fact of location which is that the sand probably used to be rock except it’s been eroded to sediment because it’s a FUCKING FLOODPLAIN

[whereserpentswalk]

flood Plain perfec t size for put town in to b\uild! inside very Soft and Comfort town safe happy put town in Floodplain. Put Town In Floodplain. no problems ever in flloodplain because good Shape and Support for town roads weak of big town citizens. Afloodplain yes a place for a town put town in floodplain can trust floodplain for giveing good place for town. friend flood

[iamlituhrallybatman]

Nature was always built to be self sustainable, that's why we shouldn't change it. This is a great example of that. There's a reason things are the way they are, people. When humans try to alter the pattern, things aren't going to be fine and dandy.

[iamlituhrallybatman]

pissed me off when I saw no one talking about superbat for the Legendary Lovers trend.

are they not the epitome of Legendary Lovers? Two prominent faces of superheroes in general? Hope and Justice? Day and Night? Alien and Human? Rich and Poor? Golden Retriever and Black Cat?

They know each other better than anyone else, trusted each other more than anyone else. Yin and Yang. Literally called THE World's Finest. So understanding of each other and in every universe, in all time lines, they find each other. Even if it's platonic, they're soulmate.

Is that not the definition of Legendary Lovers? BRING BACK SUPER SUMMER 2025 WHEN EVERYONE MADE CORENSUPES AND BATTINSON EDITD TO COLORS AND ADD LEGENDARY LOVERS INSTEAD.

[iamlituhrallybatman]

Loving how most fanfics ignore Barry's death.

Me, reading : Barry? What're you doing here?

Barry : I've always been here.

Me : But--

Barry : Shhh. Just let it happen.

[iamlituhrallybatman]

Clark is obsessed with Batman.

Older Superman who sees this younger superhero running around Gotham. Inexperienced in vigilantism, desperate and naive, in need of support. The first time he saves the man, Batman glares at him, and tells him to stay out of Gotham.

Does Clark listen? Of course not. It becomes his nightly routine to tune into Gotham, keeping an ear out for crime. Trying to guess if Batman will stop it, or if the criminals will get away. He even conceals his identity and explores Gotham, hoping to be caught up in a crime that requires Batman.

After a year, Superman approaches Batman to invite him to the Justice League. He's rejected immediately. But if there's one thing journalism has taught him, it's that you have to appeal to people's weak spot, persuade them to give up their reluctance to satisfy their morals. All it took was one intergalactic conflict that affected Earth, including Gotham. With no choice but to protect his city, Batman joins force with the League. If Clark might've instigated the conflict, well, that's no one's business but his.

After that, Batman admits having the Justice League would be nothing short of an advantage. But he doesn't exactly know how to approach them. They're all older, experienced heroes, he's still a relatively new vigilante. He can't expect them to just accept him. Except, there's a certain Superman willing to help.

Maybe Clark creates situations to make Batman dependent on him. Maybe he starts a rumor. Maybe Batman's history get revealed. Maybe Bruce's identity is at risk. Maybe Batman's plans are being sabotaged. Maybe Batman needs to be voted into thee team, or needs his plan to be taken seriously. Clark uses his seniority and founding member status to help integrate Bruce. Maybe other heroes who aren't allowed into the League as easily hate Batman for pulling strings (strings he didn't even know existed). So many situations of Clark's own making that have Bruce turning to him for help.

The first time Bruce shows up at his apartment, drenched in rain, begging Clark to help him find Green Lantern because an unknown element in his plan was tampered with, and Hal in injured in an unknown location, Clark's heart goes wild and blood rushes through his body. The first time Bruce shows up to his quarters in the Watchtower with food to discuss a case, he smiles to himself. His plan was working.

-- Insert picture of Clark giggling while staring at his bulletin board of all his plans and pictures and sticky notes with random things he's learned about Bruce --

extra stuff on this, but I don't know if I should write longer entries...

[iamlituhrallybatman]

The rain was heavy that day. Jason remembers.

He remembers clinging to his father's soaking wet thrifted t-shirt, barely able to see past the hair in his eyes, and shivering down to his bones, his teeth clacking against each other.

There was a warrant out for the arrest of Willis Todd. Ever since Catherine OD'd, he'd been a suspect of drug smuggling. He'd done a small job, some extra cash on the side to get food on the table for 2. Apparently, that warranted a jail sentence.

Jason held his father harder as sirens wailed. Cars were coming. Bad cars. To take him away, away from his father.

When Jason finally opened his eyes - blinking back the rain - he came face to face with a red building. Willis set him down on his feet, kneeling. He looked sad, and he stared at Jason like he was trying to memorize every detail.

"Jason," Willis whispered. He brushed Jason's hair out his face and smiled solemnly. "I have to go. I don't knwo when I'll be back. You have to stay here, and when someone comes and finds you, go with them."

Jason feels his throat seize and a moment later he's sobbing, hacking over breaths as he tries to calm down but he can't. "Don'-" he hiccups, feeling pathetic but grasping Willis' finger like a lifeline. "Don't leave me, dad. Please. I'm sorry-"

"Son, it's not your fault." Willis pulls him close, wrapping his arms around his boy. "It's never been and will never be your fault. I'm sorry it has to be this way. I'm so sorry." After a long moment of hugging, Willis pulls back. "I can't promise anything but, if I can, I will come and find you, as soon as possible."

Jason sniffles, chest heaving with barely restrained sobs. He holds out his hand - fingers closed except for his pinky - and whispered "Promise?" like a plea.

Willis interlocked his pinky finger and curled them. "I promise."Willis kissed Jason's forehead, whispered a final apology against his skin, and then ran.

Ran like he'd never run before.

To make sure he'd never look back until he was sure his son was safe.

- - - - - - - - -

It was a slow day in the station.

The rain had limited any fires in the region between Gotham and Metropolis so Clark propped his feet up on the table, content to spend the rest of the shift playing Poker using crackers instead of chips.

It was in there 5th round that they'd heard a sensor ring. The Safe Haven Baby Box sensor. The box had be opened.

Clark turned and immediately Lois and Jimmy put there finger of their nose and called "not it!" Clark threw his cards down on the table as he stood. 'Investigative journalists' , his foot. He shouldn't have brought them over the his station.

As he makes his way to the other side of the station, Clark composes himself. Usually, maybe 3 people a day open the Safe Haven box, looking for food or jusr curious to how is works and-- wow. The rain sure is heavy.

Tugging on a rain coat, he heads into the rain.

And there's a boy. Maybe to Clark's hip level, short, and definetely too thin for his age.

"Hello," Clark greets. The boy startles, slamming the box shut and turning to face Clark.

"I wasn't trying to steal or anything." The boy says, shifting his feet ever so slightly. So he's ready to bolt.

"I wouldn't blame you if you were," Clark smiles, and tucks his hands into his pockets. "It sure is pouring our here, isn't it? Where're your parents?" the Baby Boxes are for, we'll, babies.

"Gone." Jason looks away, lips trembling.

"I see." Clark takes a step closer. Jason doesnt back away. So Clark approaches. "Someone left your here?" the boy nods. "Want to come in? You look cold."

Another shaky nod and soon the boy is wrapped in clothes he's swimming in and rescue blankets, learning the rules to Poker from Lois.

"You're sure about this?" Jimmy asks Clark, who is now shirtless because said shirt is on a boy smaller than he should be.

"Not one bit." Clark pulls out his phone. Typing in a number he could never forget.

It takes 3 rings for the man on the other end to pick up - surprising for a sudden call at 2 am.

"Hello?" A groggy voice asks.

"Hey, Bruce," Clark's lips split into a smile at the sound of Bruce's voice. He could almost imagine himself waking up beside the man, making sure he slept well and didn't have to answer calls at 2 am. "You up?"

"I am now." Bruce murmurs, "You need something, Mr. Kent?"

"There's a boy."

A pause. Some shuffling. A door opening.

"Where?"

[iamlituhrallybatman]

Is it crazy to say that Joel and Ellie remind me of Bruce and Steph?

[iamlituhrallybatman]

To understand Bruce is to understand why he won't kill.

To understand Jason is to understand why he wants Bruce to kill.

That's why neither of them will ever fully understand each other.

Jason is not Bruce's Jason. And Bruce is no Jason's Bruce. They've both changed and both are unwilling to come to terms with that.

[iamlituhrallybatman]

BatLantern is actually such a goated ship.

Like, do you understand how sexy Hal Jordan is? The way he acts, the way he looks, the way he fights.

Bruce enters the hangar and sees Hal's private aircraft, painter black with red stripes (because apparently, Hal's favorite color is red??) and so well-maintained and Hal helps him get in and they go on a ride with beautiful scenery and Hal talks to Bruce through their aviation headsets, and the sound of Hal's confident voice as he explains everything below and above them does something to Bruce's inside, to the point Bruce asks doubts he already knows the answer to just to hear Hal's chuckle and listen to him talk for the entire ride. It's beautiful.

Once they're back on land, Hal holds Bruce's hand - or waist - to help him out and makes sure the plane is properly docked before walking through the hangar, talking about various plane models. Bruce shares what he knows of planes and Hal bites his lip because Bruce's competence is infuriatingly attractive.

They make out behind the plane.