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[thecommonchick]

I don’t want a sugar daddy but maybe like a sugar buddy. 

I just hit him up like “Hey how are you today?” 

and he replies “Doing great thanks for asking here’s $7,000.” 

[jedibookshrikeofnorta]

Person: wanna go to the book store-

Me:

[a-gathering-of-books]

How relatable

[0ctostim]

[glocc-blocc]

[libertarirynn-deactivated202006]

Male positivity? In my branding? It’s more likely than you think

[slumberinggirl-deactivated20210]

I love this

[lil-bitchnugget-blog]

Y E S. FINALLY

[citizen-zero]

AXE realized their target demographic are the preteen and teen boys who over-apply their product and decided to do something good for these impressionable youths

[feministism]

[transpondster]

[fangirlintheattic]

Gay date problem #1: who pulls the chair for who

[ithelpstodream]

[deathdaydreamm]

soappppp

[deathdaydreamm]

yall I fucking bled for this peice of trash pls like it 

[magistrate-of-mediocrity]

oh. I thought it was a photo.

[mykrazyuniverse]

Damn it took me 5 minutes to figure out why you wanted people to like a picture of soap. You did such a good job people think you are just posting random pics of soap.

[deathdaydreamm]

this isn’t the fist time this has happened, I painted lube and everyone was confused that I posted a picture of lube 

[celtic-pyro-deactivated20230725]

This is such a Monkey’s Paw kind of talent. Being so talented at hyperrealistic art that people just think they’re photos and don’t care.

[movedto-enbylebeau]

The shine on that lube is SO good tho kudos

[estradoll]

Damn that’s impressive!

[mockiato-deactivated20200315]

I need straight women to realize that they are 100% just as straight as straight men are, and that their opinions on homosexuality–including what it means to be a lesbian–are just as meaningless and inappropriate as straight men’s opinions are.

[the--bitch--blog]

Are you saying every straight opinion on homosexuality is meaningless?

[meangirlnurse]

yep

[fieldbears]

Absolutely

[scarlettohairdye]

What true love looks like.

OKAY SO I had a coworker who was otherwise a standard clueless Straight White Guy, but this dude loved his wife and he knew her real good. And his wife LOVES shitty grocery store icing. So the first thing she’d always do with any cake is shove her fingers into the corner and scoop off whatever abomination of a flower was on there and eat it off her fingers. SO THIS DUDE GOES TO THE STORE AND HAS THEM MAKE A WHOLE CAKE OUT OF FROSTING Brings it home to his wife for her birthday She shoves her fingers into it and then they just keep going FROSTING ALL THE WAY DOWN He said the look on her face was the best thing he’d ever seen in his life It gives me hope that even a clueless Straight White Guy knew and loved his wife enough to give her the perfect birthday present cake frosting abomination

And I love to imagine the conversation he had to have with the grocery store bakery.

[neurodivergent-crow]

That’s disgusting, what a good husband

[acreaturecalledgreed]

so heres a thing my mother always said to me growing up when i broke something on accident that i think is really important

and i know, from watching my friends and seeing their panic and terror when something broke, that not only were not nearly enough children told this thing, many children were punished in place of being reassured

and thats heartbreaking

so heres the words from my mom that i was always told, and theyre the same words that anyone who never got to hear them should hear now, courtesy of my mom, who has repeated those same words to many a friend of mine and now to you

if i ever broke anything, the first words out of her mouth would always be and have always been, “are you hurt?” 

i would say no

she would say, “thats okay, then”

and i would ask why

and she would say “because it was just a thing- even if its a nice thing, or an old thing, or an expensive thing, its still just a thing. it can be replaced, or we can live without it. there is only one you. there will only ever be one you. you will always be more important than just some thing.” 

[nevaehtyler]

this is iconic

[teealwayschillin-deactivated201]

This shit is so hilarious

[destinyrush]

Dude: Do you wanna get married? Girl: Yes. Dude: …..I gotta…..

[theimaginarythoughts-deactivate]

“YOU’RE FAT!! 😢” LMAO homie was hurt

[dicknurse]

actual definition of BDE

[flare-friday]

Cat Caller: “Say Mami!”

Me; “…son? is that you? …..I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD O_O”

Cat caller; “Oso!?”

[russian-hackers-official-deacti]

“If you eat a lot of dark chocolate, you will soon get used to its natural flavor and prefer it over sugary-sweet artificial milk chocolate” sorry but I can’t even consume one (1) Bitterness Tile without crying

[a-night-in-wonderland]

[icefireblackmoon4]

When you wake up to find your dog beside you in bed XD lol. He always steals all the covers and uses my pillows! Hes just so gosh darn cute!!!! :)

[icefireblackmoon4]

Wheb ir dad takes you shopping :)

[icefireblackmoon4]

I swear my eyes are the craziest colors sometimes. Lol im not human i guess :p