suck my nonexistent dick

I used to think this bit was important.

[poedaumeron]

Tangled (2010)

[mizules-deactivated20240615]

When we hit our lowest point, we are open to the greatest change.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

ask me about the difference between leopard/cheetah/jaguar print, it’s my field of expertise 

[woundedtoaster]

What is the difference? Please learn me a thing

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

cheetahs got dots! little dot dots i want to bop

leopards got filling. it’s cheetah 2.0. Cheetah on meth. look at that leopard shit. 

then there’s jaguar. Jaguar is madness. it took leopard print & decided wait. what if–MAW DOTS. it’s just leopard print with dots in the middle, it’s chaos

look at this bullshit

i’m angry just looking at it

so in ascending order: Cheetah < Leopard < Jaguar

C.L.J. someone come up with weird mnemonic for that, i’ve done enough work for you greedy bastards

[gahdamnpunk]

I AM DECEASED 😭😭

for the love of god UNMUTE this

[cancerianprincess]

SOME OF YALL DO NOT NEED ACCESS TO TECHNOLOGY 💀💀💀

[brucie-deactivated05092020-deac]

dead

[medusabraids]

[4rch0n]

sigh…

[buzzfeed]

don’t forget to drink some water, y’all.

[exeggcute]

[babyionian-deactivated20200611]

this feels like an ancient tablet from which so many cultural artifacts were derived

[ethugs]

Did you peep fishMan’s muscles when he yolks up spongebob? Bwoiiii was bout to put the fins on em.

[ruinedchildhood]

[yuirhapsody]

[shyriadracnoir-deactivated20181]

How much damage does this do if I hit someone with it

[segadreamcatcher]

they beat Jesus with that

[jaxblade]

Nickelodeon kid shows be like...

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

my new roommate’s best friend literally says “we’ll just go out for one drink” on a weeknight, goes to a club, has ONE drink while everyone else is getting to it, and then tells everyone when it’s time to go home so they can actually make it to class in the morning and I’m genuinely terrified by the amount of self control she has

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

saying you’ll just have one drink at the club on a school night and then following through and getting up for class the next day demonstrates the exact level of resolve it took to amputate your own arm on an 18th century battlefield

[feministism]

[kirbyslegalguardian]

Y’all know free condoms is a result of gay activists who worked towards safer sex practices after the AIDS crisis right? Because if not it’s one google search away

[notsonoblen]

Consider: both are important and should be free

[bedcorpse]

Consider: both are important and should be free

[twilightisgaynow]

new high school classmate: so what’s your name

renesmee: renesmee

new classmate: that’s… interesting

renesmee: my mom was on crack when she named me

bella, sitting literally two seats away: 

[sangotori]

I’m so concerned that this post implies Bella and Edward will attend high school again with their own daughter

[twilightisgaynow]

youre goddamn right thats what im implying

[memehumor]

Why Am I Like This

[gertiecraign]

We’re all like this at some point. It’s ok.

[lynati]

The box is comfy and secure while the other thing is new to us and may be haunted.

[tastefullyoffensive]

[strawbunnymoon-deactivated20240]

Bi culture: Being attracted to women with short hair and men with long hair

[marty-ish-deactivated20220429]

 also bi culture: being attracted to soft cute men and buff intimidating women

[alicexz]

If you’re ever feeling a bit down just remember you can always google “little kids in cosplay”