Or, the one in which Lee steals shamelessly from old and new favorites.
The Hero/Main Character: A tailor who dreamed of being a palace guard. Never thought they had any magic until it manifested at really inopportune time, which resulted in not only being framed for a crime they didn’t commit and getting thrown out of the castle, but having to go on the run and flee home country given who was involved. Not terribly politically savvy, mostly because they can’t keep their mouth shut when they have a thought (this is also kind of a problem with their new magic). Super scrappy and a good in-the-moment problem solver. Tends to overthink things into circles if given too much time and space to do so. Fast learner, but only if they’re interested in the subject material.
Love interests
(F) Her Majesty, the second princess: Third in line for the throne, after her older brother and his daughter. Has chosen to serve as a sort of errant knight, though officially speaking she’s a military commander (she justifies her travels by regularly visiting each outpost during her travels). Ferociously and relentlessly positive. Takes her responsibility to the kingdom very seriously, even though she spends a lot of time avoiding the actual castle and paperwork. Happiest sleeping under the open stars, with her sword by her side and companions around the fire. Generally appears like she doesn't think things through, but she does - she’s just a really fast thinker. Has a little bit of white knight syndrome, but working on being more practical. Really bad at speeches. Neutral good.
(F) The Dragon: A creature of pure magic, though she typically hangs out in a human form, serving as a lady-in-waiting (and bodyguard) to her Majesty. Stays human mostly for the ability to easily read (all the glorious and wonderful) books humans like to write. Sardonic, clever, and often offers unique perspective, but only when directly asked. A bit inscrutable, and it’s silently understood that she’ll just...leave one day rather than deal with the rift her longevity will cause. Cool and collected, unless she’s reading and you interrupt her. Met her Majesty when deciding to check her out after a neighboring prince ran away into her mountains after hearing he’d be engaged to her. The Dragon offered said prince a job cataloging and organizing her hoard and managing her investments while she’s away, which works well for all involved. Generally finds human customs hilarious and occasionally gross. Steals shiny things. Chaotic neutral.
(M) The Honorable Knight: Her majesty’s official bodyguard and best friend. Kind of a classic golden child - earnest, hardworking, steadfast, and honorable. Has a berserker button, but it takes unique circumstances to switch - he’s generally very calm in intense situations, and has his freakouts once the danger to his liege has passed. A bit overly self-sacrificing, which occasionally gets him into trouble. The only poor soul dedicated to proper etiquette and behavior in the group. Can be really, really oblivious sometimes. Possibly spends too much time with her Majesty, the Dragon, and the Bodyguard, which has given him a very skewed perception of normal female behavior. Lawful good.
(NB?) The (mostly reformed) Assassin: Originally sent from a neighboring kingdom to assassinate the second princess and frame a noble house to start a civil war. Obviously it didn’t go as planned. Basically an angry stray cat the group adopted. Incredibly honest, but very slippery about it. Very good at misdirection and distraction. Ex-circus performer, which has given them a surprising array of useful skills. Claims to only be sticking around because her majesty pays better than their former employers, and claims that if it gets too much of a pain or the coins run out, they’ll bail, but literally everyone (except the assassin) knows better. Comes and goes, acting as a spy or messenger as needed. Chaotic good, though they’ll deny it to their last breath.
(F) The Bloodthirsty Bodyguard: A mermaid cursed by her clan into silence and cast out of the ocean for crimes she doesn’t talk about. The cursebreaker (see below) broke the silence when he was even younger than he is now, and as thanks she figured she’d at least keep him alive until he grew up into what she assumed would be an inevitably awful adult human. Eventually adopted by his dads (both figuratively and formally) and doesn’t quite know what to do about it. Has toned down the mass murderer tendencies a bit at the cursebreaker’s request but still adjusting to human morality even after 10 years among them (and 8 with her adoptive family). Hates pirates. …Chaotic evil, but to be fair, was literally born that way.
EXTRAS/Non-love interests:
The Cursebreaker: Child prodigy who hasn’t yet encountered a curse he couldn’t break though some of them take time. A little overly serious and somber, but that’s mostly because he’s spent his entire childhood and teenage years dealing with curses, which tend to be (and do) really horrible things. Actually fairly well adjusted, just a little awkward. Really enjoys puzzles. Not scared by much. Not exactly a pacifist, but violence in general is something he avoids. Vegetarian. Loves his dads but in...smaller doses? Actually figured out on his own what big sis/bodyguard did to get thrown out of the ocean and has decided it qualifies as self defense. Chaotic good, mostly because he doesn’t really notice things like societal standards, and people need him too badly to get him into trouble for breaking laws or rules.
The Beast: A grand lady cursed to be a beast and found she greatly preferred being one to her human form. Let the Cursebreaker break the curse on her servants because it wasn’t really their fault, but kept her own. Lives happily in a gigantic magical library in the woods (which also showed up with the curse) and is much, much older than she lets on. Doesn’t get along with the Dragon, since the Dragon has openly voice her intention to annex the library into her hoard someday.
The (Chatelain) Prince: Technically Her Majesty’s ex-fiance. To avoid the engagement, he ran away to work for the Dragon (it wasn’t personal and there’s no hard feelings) since being kidnapped by dragons is generally a socially acceptable sort of thing for royalty to do. Now living his best life. Sends the Dragon regular updates on her invested hoard and status of her mountain domain and is generally getting lots of great estate management skills. Frighteningly efficient and organized. Lawful neutral.
His Majesty, the first prince: Heir apparent to the throne. Will be a great king -- and somewhat by necessity for the former, is not always a good person, though he’s never deliberately unpleasant for the sake of being so. Big picture and longterm strategy kind of person. Eerily good at reading people - to the point where most people assume he has Sight. Very regal and mysterious, except when his daughter wants to have a tea party or his wife wants to slide down staircases. Lawfully chaotic. That is not a thing. But that is what he is.
Her Majesty, the first consort: Third daughter of the neighboring monarchs across the mountains. Wife of the first prince. Just as mysterious and inscrutable as he is, but she lets the mischief show through a little more. No magic at all. A very tactical and detail-oriented person, she notices everything in the moment. Will 100% slide down grand staircase rails. Might actually eat you if you hurt her daughter. Likewise lawful chaotic. Most people find their majesties kind of exhausting, even when they’re on their ‘best’ behavior.
Her Majesty, the first princess: Daughter of the first prince and consort. A tiny, brilliant terror. It’s a complete coin toss whether she will someday either burn the world to ash or bring it, ascendant, into brilliance. Her parents are so proud.
The Queen: Ruler and badass old lady. No really--she’s actually grandmother to the first princess and second princess (their parents kind of tried to commit high treason - it’s a long story). Eccentric, brilliant, and capable of great brutality if it keeps her queendom safe. Has had to make some horrible choices in life, but hasn’t let that stop her from moving forward. Very much like her great granddaughter. Probably a good thing she loves her grandkids, or she’d probably destroy the world just because she was bored? But since she wants to leave them as safe and happy as possible, instead she just takes really good care of things. Really good at delegating.
The King: Everyone thinks he passed away but he hasn’t. He just likes to sneak up on people and make them think he’s haunting them. And he has his granddaughter’s wanderlust, so he’s usually off wandering the kingdom. His wife was the heir to power - he’s just the one who married her. Once worked for the Dragon as her chatelain, until the Queen ‘rescued’ him. Dragon’s still grouchy that he didn’t give two weeks notice.
Education: Primarily homeschooled by her PhD father, few years of distance schooling
Belief/worldview/faith: Everyone’s demons are different, and no one should face them alone.
What shaped that belief? How her home colony treated her pilot father, and how her scientist dad continues to prove life can find a way, and the impossible can be made actual if you just look at it differently and get the right resources.
Job: Wannabe pilot (later in plot - pilot for a Class 6X Pegasus starship working for the Intergalactic Postal Service)
Family: Dads are an ex-military pilot with a very bleak past and a brilliant, doctoral-level agricultural scientist (sometimes bordering on mad scientist, but hey), older absent-minded professor-esque brother who is off-planet working on (another) degree.
Childhood home: A middle-sized orbital colony until she was nine, when the family was one of the first to move to a frontier planet as part of the make-it-habitable efforts.
Ability/Quirk: Several-seconds ahead spontaneous precognition ability, but is unaware that’s what it is. Polyglot with a solid ear for language.
Best at: Flying
Worst at: Using her head instead of her instincts under pressure, particularly when head would tell her to not blurt out the things
Desire/Goal: Get into the experimental spacecraft pilot division so she can fly the fanciest cutting edge-edge ships
Fear: Being trapped - a lot of her piloting practice came from running sims while stuck inside during the rainy season.
Hobbies: Flying, flying anything, browsing forums for adventure stories, learning languages, singing/listening to music
Personality: Spring personified - new life, new growth, flowers and thunderstorms and deep breaths of rain-on-the-wind air. Hope. Absolutely crazy knack for spatial and situational awareness, reaction time, and just a general gleeful fondness for flight as a whole. Wants nothing more than to be a fighter pilot for the intergalactic military forces (because they have the best tech), but she can’t apply until she’s got more commercial flight experience, so she’s desperate to take any piloting job she can get. No one will hire her on her own colony due to a bad family rep (and the lingering stain of a childhood flight gone wrong during an emissary visit). Wild, reckless, but incredibly capable of focus when she’s in her element. Easily bored, and very much yearning for more than her provincial life. Bit bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, eager to get out into the universe and make it a better place. Initially believes delivering mail is going to be massively lame and unexciting, but, it’s a means to an end. Claims to hate dad jokes but they’ve creeped into her subconscious thanks to, well, her dad. Messy, stubborn, always looking ahead. Has a very, very slight power of precognition that gives her a few seconds ahead glimpse, which is partly why she’s such a good pilot, though she puts this down to luck. Super duper fidgety. Not necessarily naive, but bordering it - and a hopeful optimist to her core.
FULL AND TOTAL PREFACE that I do not support relationships between employees and employers there is a squicky power imbalance that complicates consent but this is fiction k? K.
THE SETTING
OKAY SO. FICTIONAL DEMOCRATIC CONSTITUTIONAL MONARCHY with all gender lines of inheritance because it’s not a stupid fictional country. Royalty are basically figureheads – they have power but it’s in terms of public eye and influence not actual legislative power. MC is related to the reigning monarchs but like #10 in succession – close enough that she gets a lot of unwanted attention, not close enough that it’s likely she’ll ever sit on the throne. (Duchess? Marchioness? Countess? Just straight up princess?) One of her parents was a non-royal (which was a Big Deal) heir/ess-turned-actor/actress who was tremendously wealthy so she has a lot of independent wealth, but doesn’t like to use it on herself. Works an Actual Real Job in the midst of various royal receptions and appearances and ribbon cuttings.
THE PLOT
Heroine is the only one living in the family castle/manor and since it’s just her like, why bother with all the silly trappings and pomp/circumstance? But unbeknownst to her, her fiancé got engaged to her hoping to just live a lavish lifestyle, and when he realizes this isn’t going to happen, he hires a ragtag group of thieves to rob the castle in the middle of a charity gala hosted in the castle gardens BUT MC CATCHES THEM, dumps her fiance’s sorry tush, and berates the thieves like omg do you need jobs THAT badly that you’ve resorted to theft? Fine, why don’t you just live here until you’re back on your feet – as long as you do your fair share of chores it’s not like that wing is being used anyway.
THE HEROINE:
MC: RABID BUNNY. Very proper, elegant, diplomatic, sweet—on the outside. Inside she has just a fantastically vicious mental commentary running 24/7. She IS pretty elegant but mostly out of habit. Actually 100% tough as nails and Determined to Make a Difference. If she is involved in a charity function it isn’t for pics, people. Runs herself ragged between day job and royal obligations but always snaps herself into perfectly poised as soon as someone is so much as breathing in her direction. Independently extremely wealthy thanks to non-royal parent, but incredibly frugal (maybe even tightfisted) about own expenses because it seems wrong to spend it when all those charities need it more and stuff – but she will do her research and make sure they use it appropriately. Veteran like rest of fam. IDK what her ‘day’ job is yet. Large animal emergency Veterinarian (princess prevents pig pandemonium with plague prevention best practices!)? Accountant? Researcher? Honestly just wants to be a mechanic but it doesn’t fit the IMAGE you know? Does Not Have Time For This Nonsense, Please. Will do anything for her country and her family, even if it means not being her authentic self. People depend on her, you know? And there are perks - like cupcake store grand openings.
NON LOVE INTERESTS / SUPPORTING CAST
OLDER BROTHER: Brilliant, charming, beautiful jerk. Except not really, it’s just easier. Has to work very, very hard to not let the pressure of EXPECTATIONS get to him. Very caught up in appearances. THAT SAID - got the non-royal parent’s acting genes, and would love to be an actor, but gets his kick out of acting like someone he’s not. Most likely of the sibs to crack open a beer and eat pizza when it’s just them. (Other bro would rather have some random not readily available dish that’s a specialty of whatever small mountain region he just visited, MC is strict about health food, little sis would join him she just wouldn’t START it) also the first to talk about DUTY and OBLIGATIONS until other sibs throw stuff at him. Stupidly in love with longterm partner so maybe sibs harass him about getting married when he starts stalking about obligations to them?
TWIN BROTHER: LAZY CAT, except when MC really, really needs him then he’s suddenly around. According to the public, he doesn’t have a ‘real’ job, just lays around looking pretty on boats. Does this fairly intentionally so the press focuses more on him than the other sibs – because what does he care? Actually a romance novelist and not at ALL above using his sister’s experiences as plot fodder. This leads to him giving occasionally questionable romantic advice. Travels a lot to random corners of the earth and occasionally. HORRIBLE PHOTOGRAPHER so big brother calls this a waste. ALSO probably a ‘Dear Abby’ advice columnist.
LITTLE SISTER: Circumspect, but dry-witted and prone to sarcasm when it’s just family or people can’t hear her muttering under her breath. Quiet, mostly as a result of being kind of a prop for most of her life and LOUDER older siblings– but she’s always thinking. Patient. Was always kind of a smartass. Taking every day one at a time. Was a combat medic in the country’s armed forces and is living with PTSD. Maybe working in a florist shop? I just like flowers okay. Happiest out of the spotlight and always has been. Trying to relearn things.
GRANDPARENTS: THE ROYALS. CRAZY IN THE BEST WAY.
THE LOVE INTERESTS
“TITLE” representing the chore they do in exchange for room & board and (title) representing their role in the would-be heist
“COOK” (the distraction/lookout): SWORE UP AND DOWN to MC that they were a gourmet chef so that she’d let them stay but can really only manage a basic grilled cheese sandwich – which, luckily for them, MC loves. Plus as long as she doesn’t have to make it, it’s a win. Student? Maybe? Also probably has had a crush on MC forever (maybe she volunteered at a charity event that benefited someone in their family) and all along was going to derail the heist because too much respect for MC to let it happen when they could stop it, even though it could be dangerous. Nurturing? Just wants to take care of people?
“CHAUFFEUR” (the getaway driver): THE GETAWAY DRIVER. Reckless wild child? Can’t stay still to save their life. Shameless Baby Driver rip off don’t you judge me – always drumming fingers and finding rhythms. Doesn’t talk much so you think they’re probably solemn and quiet but they’re definitely mischievous as all get out, just sneaky about it. Sees the world in color and sound and vibration, frequency of their inner pulse’s just a little off from everyone else’s. Slippery, because they have to keep moving, which includes their thoughts. Never stays stuck on anything for long.
“SECURITY” (logistics/the hacker): IT person who hacked into the (admittedly out of date) security in the first place. Rebel without a cause. Terrible diet. Keeps horrible hours. Little wild (not as wild as chauffeur), lives on the edge, also a huge nerd. Gets gleefully excited about technology, will spend actual hours fiddling and building robots and forget to stand up so their legs don’t work right when they do. Loves nature and takes inspiration from the mathematical patterns in it. Talks really fast or not at all.
“HOUSEKEEPER” (undercover paparazzi – hired muscle): Was really in this to get the inside scoop on some royals and make a few bucks. Completely jaded jerk. Wanted to be a global photojournalist but realized people just wanted pretty beaches and sunsets and didn’t actually care about people and their suffering unless it won them awards, and does it matter with social media everywhere. Probably tells MC he/she is a wedding photographer. Doesn’t like things to be ‘picture perfect’ so cleans but there’s always something left undone. Sarcastic grouch. Probably pairs up with lazy bro at end of route to get back to documenting alongside lazy bro’s travels.
“BUTLER/LADY’S MAID” (the mastermind) – was reluctant to take this job because ex-fiance is a dingbat, but did it anyway for IDK personal reasons. Not really all that bummed that it didn’t work out. If they work for MC they get into even more royal events and can learn the ins and outs of places, their habits and patterns. Thinks MC is way too uptight, gets a kick out of teasing her. Laidback, hard to ruffle, confident, all the things you expect a mastermind to be. Really good memory for physical spaces. Totally clueless when it doesn’t interest them though, maybe?
“GROUNDSKEEPER/GARDENER” (hired muscle/fencer) – IDK more to come CHILDHOOD FRIEND MAYBE gotta have that
Context: Sarcastic, ambitious, slightly aggressive, creative and caffeine-addicted CEO manages her business and falls in love, featuring:
Heroine: Risk-taker, smart enough to hire people to do the things she can’t (or doesn’t want to do), gets sh-- done and done well. Drinks too much coffee and does not know what work-life-balance is.
Barista: Peppy, optimistic, concerned for CEO’s general health and well-being. Chameleon.
PR Lawyer: Not paid nearly enough. Perennially exasperated. All to often CEO’s DD. Responsible.
Chairman of the board: hotshot venture capitalist with an attitude. Super alike to CEO which is why they bang heads a lot. Never smiles--just smirks. A lot.
Flaky model: Hired to promote new product, floating breezily through life like the blessed flower child they are.
Chef: Grump with a heart of gold, has CEO’s takeout order ready (with extra veggies because girl, vitamins)
Preschool teacher neighbor: Actual hufflepuff, single parent, has the work-life balance stuff figured out.
CEO MC: Never gets enough sleep, which makes her sarcastic but is also semi her own fault given the amount of caffeine she consumes. Sort of obsessive about long-term planning, unwaveringly believes that a company’s value comes from its employees and will choose them over shareholder dividends every time. Determined to run an ethical company even if it means it’s not the most profitable company. Super duper Type A – aggressive and fearless because she has to be. Sometimes really just wants a cupcake in her hand and a cat in her lap, but then she’s bored and goes back to business planning. Creative risk-taker, decent negotiator. Smart enough to know where she needs help and hire people who can do the things she can’t (or, more to the point, doesn’t want to do). Gets back up every time. Will definitely fight you. Might feel bad about it later but only if someone reminds her it happened.
Love Interests
The BARISTA: Peppy, optimist (or so MC thinks) but it turns out they actually switch up their personality depending on who they’re serving (sometimes they are the chill, hipster philosopher, sometimes they are the rude New York get-it-done eye roller, etc.) actually somewhere in the middle of it all – but really IS an optimist despite themselves. Kind of slippery and hard to pin down. Big family, used to being what their other siblings/parents need from them. Fairly certain CEO MC is headed for an early heart attack with the amount of espresso she imbibes. Probably an author. Maybe an ex-broadway personjust because. IDK.
The PR LAWYER: Worked-three-jobs-put-self-through-college story. Patience, tact, good at calming people down. Detail oriented, a little fussy about appearances. Perennially exasperated by CEO (Please don’t promise to have a cure for cancer In the next three years with no data to back it up. No, you can’t punch the reporter for being a dick. Look, I know you WANT to donate 100% of proceeds to charity but please pick a friendlier one than ‘punch reporters in the face foundation’ that’s not gonna fly) never gets enough sleep. Has a key to MC’s house so they can come yell at her for making their life difficult at whatever hour of the night she insists on doing so. Is on MC’s speed-dial, which means they also get called to DD, though they’d rather not.
FLAKY MODEL(s?): Trust fund kid? Pretty face? Floats through life? The sort of person who will get on the wrong subway train and then just ride it all day people-watching never mind that they had an appointment six hours ago. Pose with a boa constrictor? Sure, as long as it’s being treated humanely. Tarantula on the face? Awwww, it’s fuzzyyyyy. No filter, no worries. Probably drags CEO MC along on a Caribbean shoot and PR Lawyer has to call and yell because that does not look good, okay? And poor MC is like, I thought we were getting a drink and model is like WE ARE we are getting tropical coconut water from the SOURCE here oh wait I don’t know how to drink out of a coconut…who knows why they are attracted to CEO MC, probably because she’s there and sticks around and no one else does. Human puppy dog.
CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD: young hotshot venture capitalist, thinks CEO MC is a bleeding heart (your employees do not need that many sick days, lost productivity blah blah blah why do we need a daycare onsite that’s a waste of shareholder money), kind of a math whiz, naturally lucky, doesn’t get along with family (gambling problem in the fam – which manifests in him in investment risks and unresolved issues) butts heads constantly with MC, frequently tries to get her fired – in part because his attempts to do so get her fired up and she does great things, which ultimately is better for the company than when she’s just doing her normal ‘good’ job. She is going to be royally ticked when she figures that out. Manipulative, but relatively benign under it all. The sort of person who smirks instead of smiles. All the time.
CHEF FROM HER FAVORITE RESTAURANT: Also a CEO though on smaller scale, because, running a restaurant IS running a business. Probably under the impression CEO MC is actually like, a graduate student with no money because she tends to get takeout at weird hours. Gruff, grumpy, abrupt, but heart of gold. Basically—will grumble about you coming in late but will add extra veggies to your pasta because you’re looking a little pale and need the nutrients and if you call them on it will snarl that they had to be used up they were going bad and he wasn’t going to waste extra, expensive, PROTEIN on you. (MC asks them out and then realizes the only nice restaurant she knows is the one the chef owns)
PRESCHOOL TEACHER: JUST A DECENTLY NICE PERSON. Checks in to make sure MC has eaten regularly, staying hydrated, needs anything fixed around the house (she can do her own plumbing but doesn’t like the electrical and hey it’s nice to have company). Good with kids. Maybe divorced and wanted them but ex-spouse didn’t? idk. Calm, not easily ruffled, sweet as pie, except when he’s playing video games and suddenly MC understands how he can get through the day without any aggression – he unleashes it on fictional zombies. Blissfully normal, all things considered.
PERSONAL TRAINER: “fine, whatever, EAT THE DANG CHEESE if you’re just going to ignore my nutritional advice we’re doing ten more reps” athletic, happiest when DOING versus saying or reading or sitting. Not as impulsive as you’d guess at first glance, because they tend to use working out as a meditative time to make decisions. Didn’t finish college because they realized they just didn’t enjoy it, but they did enjoy working with student athletes, which is how they got into training. Enviably fit. Wants to expand the gym so wheedles business advice out of MC in exchange for not harassing her about her tendency to drink coffee instead of water (she insists it has water IN it, it should count) not particularly intimidated by her, which is a pleasant change of pace.
Supporting Cast (non LIs)
ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT: Keeps MC sane, has her back, schedules everything. Good at details, even better at smiling at angry people and making them not-angry through sheer force of sunny personality (actually a ruse, MC is convinced she’s actually the most delightfully evil person ever, but like some kind of fairy tale where when you acknowledge the thing it goes away, refuses to ever dive into figuring out). Older than the MC because we need to stop making middle aged women invisible in stories?? Sometimes has to remind MC of how much she does by holding silent protests (in part why MC thinks she is secretly a supervillain in the making) which are always, always successful.
PARENT COMPANY ADMIN ASSISTANT: Bane of MC’s existence. Smarmy, smily pain in the tush.
CFO: We have put in an official request with the company credit card management to start declining purchases at that coffee shop you go to, no this is not negotiable, it’s not in the budget anymore drink so darn water woman. Completely willing to go toe-to-toe with MC, meetings often involve a lot of yelling, but they’re always productive and no hard feelings.
CIO: Serpent-y, but not in a bad way. Just a very cool-tempered person, very contained, very guarded, very introverted. Never happy when she has to do presentations, so super willing to share knowledge with MC so she does it instead (she is not a great teacher, kind of judgey and shows her frustration when MC doesn’t ‘get’ it right away, but very brilliant, and there’s no malice in the judgement, just no filter). Extremely logic-oriented and process-oriented over people-oriented. Picks up and assess tech very quickly, and good at finding affordable, fast solutions.
RANDOM MARKETING EMPLOYEE: Set up to be a villain but is actually like gung-ho on MC’s side. Literally an ex pageant queen, went to college on scholarship from it. Out of the workforce for awhile as a stay at home mom when her kids were young, but picks up the new trends fast. Now a single mother, so will literally fight the chairman if he tries to take away the company daycare. Some days uses the ‘people see a pretty face and assume no brain’ to her advantage, some days it wears her out. Unofficially drinking buddy with MC, even though they both feel weird about it given the fact MC is technically boss’s boss’s boss.
BARTENDER: also an ex-girlfriend maybe? Current best friend? Who she turns to when the barista cuts her off from coffee and the chef’s restaurant is already closed. Sharp-tongued, bristly, generally disgusted with MC’s six inch heels and slacks in her leather-jacket, cigar smoke bar. Like lady, you’re lost. Probably on the mob payroll at some point in her life.
ROUTE PLOTS:
(Chairman route?) MERGER – company has just bought another company, which is a major risk move for CEO (can only be one, so do you keep the old one on as a VP? Do you let them go? Will they be bitter/try to sabotage you?) you have to fend off internal sabotage, get everything running smoothly without either company falling apart in the process.
(PR Lawyer route?) Parent company did something massively shady and it’s tainting your company’s name too, so you have to scrounge to avoid having to fire half your employees and keep the company alive.
(Model route?) New product launch – hence why models are entering the picture. It’s a new business venture in the sense it’s targeted at a completely new audience your company hasn’t catered to before.
(Personal Trainer route?) Company is in its infancy, hugely risky time, and you’re doing everything you can to ensure it’s a success (maybe including putting your own salary back into it, which means you can’t afford PT so they agree to work with you as long as you give them business advice)
FROM @han-pan- they keep trying to buy new retail space for the gym and MC keeps buying it instead because it’s SUCH GOOD PROPERTY and they sort of exasperatedly are like ugh fine whatever you owe me since you keep swiping prime spots out from under my nose
Responsible, chill automechanic wakes up with superpowers that suspiciously resemble city’s top hero’s - and said hero has gone MIA. She gets swept up into a secret corporation’s superhero support system, despite best efforts to live normal life.
Love Interests:
The perennial hostage (ex-journalist turned exasperated microbrewer in attempt to stave off kidnappings)
The (ex-villain) butler (ex-supervillain, judgy and snarky)
The villain’s kid (total softie with a trigger temper)
The legacy (costume designer child of superheroes, no powers)
The golden hero (rescued her once, bit of an overly serious dork)
Supporting cast:
Mentor (badass lady hero whose city-saving sacrifice cost her powers, but not her skills and knowledge)
Mother (kinda flaky curtainmaker) & Stepmother (musical theatre nerd and owner of automechanic shop) & much younger little sibs (they want a dog)
Roomie (also arch-nemesis, but they do their dishes and pay rent on time)
Various villains & heroes
Context
Superpowers come in one of two ways - an epic, disastrous tragedy (explosions in abandoned factories, radioactive spills, bites from super-creatures, aliens) or genetics. When the heroine wakes up one day with superpowers, she really just wants to ignore them and go back to work, but she’s whisked off by the staff of a secret company designed to support superheroes and given a choice - learn how to control her powers, and pay back the company for her training, supplies, costumes, and support by working to save the world, dropping out and becoming a villain, or going home, risking exposure and damage and having to go into the super-powered protection program, leaving family and friends behind. Begrudgingly, she opts for the first option - but she’s not exactly putting a whole lot of effort into it. Or she wasn’t planning to, except the nature of her superpowers makes it impossible to avoid notice, and suddenly the city’s most well-known superhero takes a personal interest in raising her to follow in his footsteps.
Heroine
Automechanic who really just wants to build stuff, not save the world (especially if it means classwork) but hey, thanks for the spandex tights. Had to be the ‘adult’ for most of her life, until stepmother came into the picture in high school, but some habits are hard to break. Responsible and organized, but they’re learned traits - underneath is a bit of a slapdash wild child just waiting to explore. Got dragged into theatre a lot by her mother, and has a mixed relationship with theatrics as a result. Super chill, not particularly curious about stuff that isn’t in her exact wheelhouse of interests (work, family, video games). Definitely has a hero complex, it just has to be right in front of her face - ie, she won’t go prowl the streets looking for crimes to foil, but if she sees someone being profiled at a supermarket she’ll speak up. Not lazy, exactly, but also not super motivated. More interested in the villain’s motorcycle than their dramatic speech. Not one to agonize over the ethics of superhero-ing. They hit you, you hit back. You save the citizens, you hang the person who held them hostage from a flagpole, you go home and play video games.
Love interests
The Butler: Head of staff for the superhero billionaire who took heroine under their wing. A (barely) reformed supervillain (because the butler always does it aaahahaha) but either had powers taken away, just never uses them, or they are very very subtle, Heroine can’t tell. Didn’t lose the tendency towards snarky, jerkish banter. Makes no secret of the fact they think heroine can't hack it in the big leagues. Simultaneously takes care of every need (laundered supersuits, fresh juice with breakfast, chamomile before bed) and pokes at every sore spot with snark and side commentary. Very, very loyal to the hero they work for. Cocky, confident, but also very good at blending in and disappearing, which comes in handy for espionage sorts of things. Very lax stance on morality and ethics. Very strong stance on presentation, tidiness, and appropriate breakfast options (no cold pizza on his watch).
The (Designated) Hostage: Very first person heroine rescues - albeit somewhat inadvertently. Unfortunately, this leads to them being a pretty regular target for any villains passing through, which massively annoys them at first but after they work through the various stages of grief they end up on the acceptance side. Periodically manages to rescue themselves. Possibly becomes a villain in one of the routes out of spite. Initially works as a journalist, but quits in the hopes of dissuading villains and opens their own microbrewery instead--if they’re going to have to sit around waiting for the heroine to show up, they can at least have a beer while they wait, right? Has a fairly remarkable pain tolerance and high fear threshold at this point.
The Legacy: Child of two exceptional superheroes who was expected to do tremendous things - except they never manifested powers. Their little sibling did, and resentful of all the expectations set on Legacy, went off and became a supervillain so basically there is Serious Family Drama. For their part, legacy is honestly massively relieved not to have powers. Quiet, dreamy, bit of a flower-child but very sharp when they pay attention and focus. Because they know all about superheroes (and wanted to stay in the loop on little sib) they work for the superhero support system, designing costumes (their motto is ‘flattering, functional, bulletproof’). Has been around the company forever so they know everyone and everything. Fluctuates between practical (due to such longterm exposure to the way things are) and philosophical (which they’ve had to be to accept parents choosing heroics over family time).
The Villain’s Kid: Family Issues, Episode 2. As far as anyone knows, their villainous parent killed their heroic parent and is still serving consecutive life sentences for the aftermath (there’s more to it, but no one ever gets the villain’s side). Subsequently, there’s a lot of mistrust of VK, who is actually the sweetest, softest marshmallow around - though admittedly when you do manage to get their ire up, it gets nasty fast. Quietly confident in their identity, no matter how absent parents were (not totally their fault) or how much people expect them to be something else. Uses what could be incredibly destructive powers in a surprisingly effective, non-violent way most of the time. Likes to keep things simple and not overthink it (because then they start plotting and that’s, you know, frowned on).
The (other) Superhero: One of the heroes whose powers manifested via tragic explosion in their early teens. Ran around trying to save the world in a sweatshirt and Halloween mask until the superhero support system scooped them up and got them a real costume and some martial arts training. Genuinely a good person, trying to do their best to save everyone and everything, despite it kind of burning them out just from constant stream of demands and the fact they are incapable of treating people’s lives being at risk as routine. Same age as heroine (maybe a year younger) but has been doing this a lot longer - actually saved her once or twice back in the day. Civilian identity is a regular at the repair shop - heroine always assumed they were just a lousy driver, but it’s more that villains tend to destroy their ride as collateral damage. Kind of quiet, kind of dorky. Has one of the best track records for saving people, but doesn’t really know how to relax or wind down. Grizzled vet of the biz, though they’d be genuinely startled to be identified as such.
Supporting Cast
Roommate/Arch-nemesis: Always pays the rent on time, never leaves dishes in the sink, but also dons a mask and tries to take over the city at night at least twice a month. Still not the worst roomie heroine’s ever had. Plus, they have a dog so they can’t be that bad. Will literally leave in the middle of a dramatic confrontation to go let the dog out, too. Dramatic, but not psychotic. Unless you threaten the dog.
Mentor: Superhero “officially” retired from active duty on account of losing her superpowers during an act that saved millions of lives but that doesn’t stop her from pulling on the mask and using influence, technology, and sheer knowledge of tactics to even the playing field when her mentees are in over their heads--though she is also a big believer in trials by fire, and they’re all usually strong enough to survive a hospital stay or two, so they don’t count on her. SERIOUSLY pragmatic. Excellent strategist and longterm thinker - can match any supervillain in xanatos gambit capability except she keeps her cards close to her chest and her mouth shut so no one knows (least of all her mentee) until the chips fall. Believer in preparing for the worst at all times - which means putting her mentee through the worst because better it’s with her than with a supervillain who won’t take her to the medbay after. Doesn’t pull punches.
Mother: Very loving, very sweet, very flaky. Tries very hard to step up to the plate but just isn’t great at it - she does best when someone else can provide structure and guidance and she can just fill in the details. Super forgetful. Makes custom curtains, but also does tailoring, and used to make all of heroine’s halloween costumes. Still makes costumes for the local community theatre. Really wanted to be an actress, but can never remember lines, so nowadays is happy in the audience. Likes to create things, but doesn’t do well with deadlines. Determinedly defends small happinesses in a world where she is called frivolous for doing so - she maybe is a little, but it’s more that she recognizes happiness is rare and special and so feels it should never be begrudged. Loves her kids, but isn’t the greatest at remembering details like doctor’s appointments or shoe sizes or school supplies.
Stepmother: Owner of the autorepair shop, frequent stage manager, director, and sometimes performer at the local community theatre - it’s a toss up whether she loves the stage or cars more. In general, she just likes seeing things come together. Likes lists and more importantly, checking things off of them. Heroine’s mother helps keep her spontaneous and gets her to explore new things. Came into heroine’s life when she was in high school, and they generally get along pretty well. There are occasionally awkward moments, but they both love Heroine’s mother and want her to be happy and that goes a long way.
Little Brother 1 (~9/10 ish): Long-suffering little brainiac. Sarcastic little snot, but only because he already worries about everything, which makes heroine super sad because he shouldn’t have to. Reader, and likes to show off new words he finds in books (doesn’t always pronounce them properly, but the family is so stoked to have a smart kid they are all for it anyway). Secretly really likes musicals but acts like he hates them because his parents will drag him to every audition on the planet otherwise and he likes watching them not participating. Likes to be on the fringes of things, offering commentary, but doesn’t like the spotlight or being in the center. Really wants a dog.
Little Brother 2: (~6/7ish) Hyper-curious chatterbox until he wears himself out and just wants to cuddle. ALSO wants a dog. Likes putting on family plays (though insists every time if they had a dog it could play XYZ role). Wants to be a professional soccer playing paleontologist most days. Doesn’t like being alone.
Little Sister (~4/5ish): UH TBD it’s been awhile since I had a niece/nephew in this range I forget what they are like >>;; slightly demanding? Also wants a dog because bros want a dog?
Context: Renovation specialist heroine takes on a (haunted) project that ends with her getting cursed and subsequently integrated into the supernatural society of what she thought was a quiet town.
Heroine: Brawns over brains but with business sense. Stars in a house renovation TV show. 100/100 chill about suddenly having otherworldly powers and portals to the underworld in her new basement (though she does worry about resale). Has absolutely nonexistent curiosity except when it comes to houses (are there hardwoods under this?!)
Packmaster: Grumpy sourpuss with a squishy heart of gold. Not actually a werewolf, does not want to be in charge, but got picked anyway. Tired dad. Owns a scrapyard MC frequents.
Professor: Textbook absent-minded professor. Brilliant but a space cadet. Has a kind of mean streak when pushed, but usually regrets it. Overly excited about science.
Vampire: Recently turned vamp (<10 years ago?), engineering grad student, introvert, new age raid-the-red-cross kind of vamp, more focused on getting PhD than being spooky and mysterious.
Mermaid: flighty, impulsive, vindictive, charismatic, vicious. Doesn’t exactly prescribe to human moral code but is so dazzling it’s easy to kind of miss that. Banned from karaoke night.
Heroine
MC: Prefers to use brawns over brains - percussive problem-solver for sure. Manages to run her own contracting business but finds the actual business part to be a tedious pain and would much rather be balancing ceiling beams than books. Stars in a flipping houses/renovation style TV show even though she thinks its a little silly. Bought a house to flip despite everyone warning her it was haunted. SURPRISE SURPRISE it was, and now she’s cursed to be something that’s not exactly human anymore. (not sure what okay but strong and definitely much less vulnerable - maybe channels otherworld power like a not-quite-human portal or something) Not that she’s too worried about it, as long as she can still hit stuff? Can keep an renovation on schedule to the second, cannot remember what is in her fridge 30 seconds after checking it on her own time. Really dislikes puns. Gets elected to president of the local cryptid council 100% because she is new and clueless and everyone was tired of fighting and figured they could influence the new kid. Except SURPRISE she’s just like RAD I’m in CHARGE let’s DO STUFF. Has absolutely nonexistent curiosity except when it comes to houses (are there hardwoods under this?!)
LOVE INTERESTS:
PROFESSOR: Not magical or supernatural in any way. Textbook absent-minded professor/research nerd. Could probably write a thesis in a dead language. Probably did, in fact. Font of knowledge on the supernatural, even though they insist it’s just a hobby (actual PhD is probably in something super difficult but they explain they picked it because it’s easy they can do it in their sleep and focus on the fun stuff - supernatural research) . Earnest, honest, will absolutely walk into the faerie ring for science. Has a little bit of a mean streak and pushes too far too often, though they usually regret it.
PACKMASTER: (Possibly not actually a wolf? Maybe like a large cat that got adopted into the pack somewhat against their loner will like a bunch of golden retrievers swarming around the kitty? OR A BEAR?) Gruff, grumpy giant teddy bear (maybe literally) total grouch pants sourpuss with a heart of gold. Makes furniture and owns an architectural salvage ‘store’ (it’s more like a barn) that also doubles as a ‘restaurant’ (three bar stools and a window, and you get whatever he was making that morning - usually sandwiches and chili) has been doing this long enough to know ‘bite the sh-- out of it’ is, while often tempting, not always viable. POSSIBLY has an adopted werewolf (puppy!!) kid. Frequently grumbles and groans about being in charge, because it genuinely wears on him to be responsible for others, because he’s not capable of doing it halfway. Basically the town dad, minus any dad jokes. Maybe more like the grouchy town grandpa grumbling under his breath about whippersnappers on his lawn. Just picture a mildly grumpy cat buried in a pile of happy, wiggling corgis.
VAMPIRE: Recently turned vamp (<10 years ago?), engineering grad student, introvert, new age raid-the-red-cross kind of vamp, more focused on getting PhD than being spooky and mysterious. Super good at hypnotizing/memory modification, despite being so young, which is probably a result of wanting people to go away so they can study. Did Not Sign Up For This. Pretty chill, all around. Kind of the epitome of inertia - won’t act unless acted upon first. Totally content to just, exist.
MERMAID: flighty, impulsive, vindictive, charismatic, vicious. Fled the ocean for a reason and not about to go back, thanks. Doesn’t exactly prescribe to human moral code (drowning your enemies or sinking your shark teeth into them is always a viable option) but is so dazzling it’s easy to kind of miss that. Banned from karaoke night. Incapable of NOT making a scene, kind of gets a thrill out of it and just doesn’t understand the concept of laying low.
SOMEONE ELSE idk. Like a half-fairy or something. Psychic? Human who made a deal with a demon that neither party is totally sure how to fulfill because they sneezed in the middle of making it?
Supporting Cast (Non LIs)
THE WEREWOLVES:
Little League coach, werewolf, foster momma (General consensus is ‘nice, but overwhelming’.)
Short order cook, werewolf, foster papa (just as intense as his wife, but with the bonus of occasional creampuffs - county fair pie winner 13 years and running)
Kiddos: teenage werewolves, kind of a handful (no impulse control), super protective of their pack
THE WEREGOOSE - smol, will fight you, MC’s best friend, not super chill about hanging around the wolves around full moons, helpless romantic because geese mate for life okay
Various others--pack sits around ~13 members including the pups, because 13.
THE GHOST: Comes and goes. Gets a kick out of giving terrible advice. Definitely cursed MC. Also definitely much more than just a ghost. Which if the MC were the sort who actually had any kind of curiosity or put thought into things, she would probably figure out.
TV PRODUCER: City-slicker, high-power, high energy bust your tush go-getter, not happy about being out of the Big City and in this small hick coastal town but its their job and they will do it better than anyone else. I don’t care if you sprout bat wings every full moon now we have a schedule to keep and shiplap to oo and ah over.
SPELLCASTER: Clumsy, really bad at it, skill improves considerably the angrier they are, which means most of their spells involve a great deal of colorful and creative cussing. Stubborn. Flies on a swiffer in a pinch. Does not want to be involved with supernatural stuff. And yet totally can’t stay away
LITTLE SIBS: Drop in a lot, going to school nearby. Parents are out of the picture - so they get sort of absorbed into the werewolf pack even though they are not werewolves.
BUSINESS PARTNER: Handles most of the book managing because MC hates it. Long-suffering. Persuasive. Also probably a werewolf - the super chill one that just wants to gnaw on an apple while everyone runs around howling and sniffing things.
MEMBERS OF THE SUPPORT GROUP that MC was elected Pres of:
Various other vampires (old moody and mysterious and grouchy about never getting elected)
Contingent of spellcasters (little old lady who knits with her magic wands, couple of teens, most of the school’s PTA )
Few random entities (elementals, Lady Luck, etc.)
Other cursed people (one of whom can’t talk because pearls and roses come out, that kind of thing)
Job: Captain of mail ship (class 6X - Pegasus), frontier circuit
Socio-economic class: Comes from wealth but ignores that fact
Education: Military academy trained engineer
Belief/worldview/faith: Luck has more power than perseverance, passion, or planning, and you have no control over it at all - all you can do is control how you respond, and even that may not be enough.
What shaped that belief? A Titantic-esque combat promotion a few months out of the academy, where [REDACTED]
Family: Daughter of an engineer and son of high-society turned artist. Dad tended to be solemn and serious, mom was sweet but a flake (brilliant, but, flake). Lots of incredibly nosy, overbearing extended family (mostly on mom’s side). Little brother.
Childhood home: A wealthy, bustling planet known for its arts and dramas and for producing many political leaders.
Ability/Quirk: Mild empath, much as she truly wishes she was not. Has a knack for percussive maintenance.
Best at: Gallows humor
Worst at: Snapping out of it afterwards
Desire/Goal: Survive
Fear: Having to [REDACTED]
Hobbies: Gambling, cards, fixing her ship, sleeping
Overview: Tired, jaded, boss who just wants to do her job to minimum standards, get paid, and go to bed. First one to complain about her job despite being in charge. Generally puts in the least amount of effort possible. Absolute dead-on badass when she has to be, but will complain about it loudly. Has been to just about every raggedy edge of space there is and seen what happens to people who stay there. Opts not to think about it too much - you do the job, you go home, you move on. Will probably gamble half the cargo in a poker game despite protestations of crew. Mercurial, hidden beneath a slightly bite-y kind of lazy friendliness. Never Paid Enough For This Shit. Cocky, but not reckless.
Get it? It’s a play on pony express...okay yeah not my best
Context: An intergalactic mail ship, trying to slog through the mundanities of providing regular postal service but gets constantly derailed by various interstellar shenanigans NEEDS A PILOT so they take on the heroine. FEATURING:
Heroine/MC: Bright eyed and bushy-tailed ace pilot ready for a life of ADVENTURE and EXCITEMENT. Which she...sort of gets. Slight seconds-ahead precog abilities, which help with her piloting though she puts it down to luck and good reactions.
Captain: Not Paid Enough For This Shit. Tired, jaded, and a teensy bit lazy, has to be goaded into not just dumping packages by her diligent first mate. Will go to the mat for you, but will bitch about it. Has definitely gambled away the cargo at least once.
First Mate: Half-alien, tends to be fastidious about scheduling and fulfilling obligations - the comfort found with structure has less to do with liking it and more to do with a method of self-control - she has a berserker side that tends to get engaged by the unexpected. Which comes in handy but is not to be relied on.
Mechanic: GRUMPY CAT who is also a slight empath, which is why he finds being around people so exhausting. Despite not liking people, is polyglot who ends up having to do most of the negotiations on rim planets or outer territories. HELLA DEDICATED in a weird way - that customer scheduled a package pickup, I don’t care if there’s a solar storm, the ship can handle it and we’re picking up the effing package. Like FM, finds structure soothing.
Medic: Bookish, proper, perennially exasperated nerd. Actually a hell of a shot in combat and has no qualms about it, though he very, very rarely kills (enough of a good shot to incapacitate on first go) unknown if he would. Prone to lecturing. Gets excited about SCIENCE.
“Human Resources” Officer: An alien stowaway who the crew lets stay because they save on CO2 scrubbers with them onboard, since that’s what they consume for energy (thereby freeing up resources for the humans - get it?). Incredibly friendly but incredibly private - one of those people who can make you feel like your best friends but you realize hours after the conversation you learned nothing about them. Thoughtful mediator. Mysterious! OoOoH.
The Heroine: Ace pilot. Absolutely crazy knack for spatial and situational awareness, reaction time, and just a general gleeful fondness for flying. Wants nothing more than to be a fighter pilot for the intergalactic government (because they have the best tech), but she can’t apply until she’s got more commercial flight experience, so she’s desperate to take any piloting job she can get. No one will hire her on her own colony due to a bad family rep (and the lingering stain of a childhood flight gone wrong during an emissary visit). Wild, reckless, but incredibly capable of focus when she’s in her element. Easily bored, and very much yearning for more than her provincial life. Bit bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, eager to get out into the universe and make it a better place. Initially believes delivering mail is going to be massively lame and unexciting, but, it’s a means to an end. Claims to hate dad jokes but they’ve creeped into her subconscious thanks to, well, her dad. Messy, stubborn, always looking ahead. Has a very, very slight power of precognition that gives her a few seconds ahead glimpse, which is partly why she’s such a good pilot, though she puts this down to luck. Super duper fidgety.
Supporting Cast:
Dad - veteran fighter pilot. Not the life he wants for his little girl, but also recognizes it’s her life to live, and he can’t make her decisions. Sincerely hopes she doesn’t have the same experience he had. Quiet, serious, gentle, supportive.
Dad - agricultural scientist, focusing on pesticides that protect crops from planet’s local insects without making the food toxic. Prone to giddy scientific tangents. Fully recognizes his daughter takes after her other father more than him and doesn’t mind a whit - he just gently tries to remind her that she’s got a brain in addition to brawn and to use it sometimes. Slightly too fond of dad jokes.
Ex-mail pilot: IDK spiraling through some bad stuff, maybe redeemable, maybe not. Probably ends up working for agriculture dad.
Love Interests:
Captain: Tired, jaded, boss who just wants to do her job to minimum standards, get paid, and go to bed. First one to complain about her job despite being in charge. Generally puts in the least amount of effort possible. Absolute dead-on badass when she has to be, but will complain about it loudly. Has been to just about every raggedy edge of space there is and seen what happens to people who stay there. Opts not to think about it too much - you do the job, you go home, you move on. Will probably gamble half the cargo in a poker game despite protestations of crew. Mercurial, hidden beneath a slightly bite-y kind of lazy friendliness. Never Paid Enough For This Shit.
First Mate: Fastidious, precise, responsible. Fond of regularity and lists and order and tasked with the impossible keeping the ship’s schedules on-time. Can come across a bit stiff and formal but is actually just keeping a tight rein on some seriously lacking impulse control. Has a heck of a berserker button. Ex-pirate, the reasons for becoming on being tied to a lot of circumstances not under her control, and getting out having a lot to do with why she follows her captain. Generally fairly serious. Adaptive half-alien (embodiment of what does not kill her makes her stronger) straight up tank in combat. Has an absolute weakness for anything small and cute despite her best efforts to hide it.
Ship’s Mechanic: GRUMPY CAT. SUCH A GRUMPY CAT. Does not like people, likes machines and fiddling and fixing things. Also takes job to a possibly weirdly serious extreme - a package pickup was scheduled, so we are going to pick up the effing package I don’t care if there’s a hurricane on the surface of that planet we’re going in, we’re getting the package, we’re delivering it, it’s what we do. Despite the fact they don’t like people, they’re a polyglot with the strongest language skills, and invariably end up as the negotiator. Kind of an anxious person who finds the repair and completion of manual tasks very soothing, so it’s almost a guarantee when they disappear after having to be social for too long that they’re building something. Responsible for making most of the weapons the crew uses. Mild empath, which contributes to their people-exhaust-me deal. Doesn’t actually have much of a temper, just exists in a constant grouch-state - his temper runs cold before it goes hot.
Medic: Absolute nerd. Lives for books--especially the old fashioned, made out of solid material style--and knowledge and research. Bit of an absent-minded professor type when they get down a research rabbit hole. Has a very good reason for wanting to be on the move with a lowkey group of postal workers, but keeps it to himself. Actually super reliable in combat and an absolute crack shot, but he uses that skill to disarm/disable instead of kill. Super polite and respectful (and respectable) until he really knows someone well, at which point he will 10/10 call you out for being stupid if you get hurt doing something stupid. Can be a little stuffy. The last person you would expect to engage in mayhem but has a surprising aptitude for it, given the smarts. Will just sort of frown gently at you if you suggest it, though.
“HR”/Communications officer: Alien, former stowaway who the captain allows to stay for free because they generate energy through the consumption of CO2 (the same way humans do by eating food/water/oxygen) and therefore lets the crew save costs on CO2 scrubbers. Jokes that they are the human resources department since most of the rest of the crew is human or mostly human and they are often the mediator. Quiet and private (in the sense they are excellent conversationalists, get along with everyone, and yet somehow manages to steer the conversation away from themselves in such a way no one really knows much about them, even though they like them and feel like a friend). Comes across as very thoughtful but is actually a bit detached and has a pleasant but vicious streak when pressed. Doesn’t usually get involved in the day-to-day operations (they’re usually the one who stays behind with the ship while everyone is delivering) but can be persuaded in a crunch to get out there with their crew, and is packing a lot of firepower in their innate being (doesn’t use weapons or need them) but is picky about getting involved due to a strict code they don’t share. Super shady about their backstory and why they choose to live in a beaten up old piece of space junk instead of settling on a colony or planet, but it suits them. No one’s super sure what they do for a living, but they always have currency.
