I’m Right On Top Of That Rose

[kiragecko]

The Tiger Poem in Classical Maya!

The Tiger He has destroyed his cage Yes Yes The tiger is out By Nael, Age 6

Literal translation:

he-destroyed his-captive-place the-jaguar yes-yes he-came.out the-jaguar his-writing master-Na'el man[of]-6-years

Transliteration:

ʔu-jomow ʔu-baaknal ʔu-balahm xt xt Joyoy ʔu-balahm ʔu-tz'ibaal Aj-Naʔel Aj-6-habiy

Character Transliteration (ALL CAPS are characters that stand for full words, lower case are syllabic):

ʔu-jo-mo-wa ʔu-ba-ki-NAL ʔu-BALAM-la-ma xa-ta-xa-ta jo-JOY-yi ʔu-BALAM-ma ʔu-tz'i-ba-li AJ-na-ʔe-le AJ-6-HAB-bi-ya

[Image shows the poem written in 2 columns of Maya glyph blocks. A diagram shows the reading order (which is complex). All the posts text is also included on the image.

End ID.]

[ineedacwtch]

I love it when super educated/smart people use their intelligence for comedy.

[ineedacwtch]

So I’m watching the I Know What You Did Last Summer movies before I see the new one and the plot of I Still Know What You Did Last Summer is weirdly similar to Nancy Drew Ransom of the Seven Ships in a lot of ways. I really need to know if this is intentional.

[street-of-mercy]

Opening Tumblr on March 15th

[ineedacwtch]

It is now February and thus the season of ❤️ Love ❤️ so I am sharing several Valentines I made of lines from Weird Al’s masterpiece Jackson Park Express. Feel free to share with your loved ones (just don’t steal credit or whatever).

(Obligatory statement: I don’t own any of the images used and these are not for sale, just fun)

[fredbydawn]

Phantom of the Paradise Out of Touch THURSDAY

[mktsquarehero]

Really wish I had remembered to repost this last Thursday, which was Paul Williams birthday.

[supreme-leader-stoat]

Brainstorming session to figure out what we're gonna do because the king likes Daniel more than me and you

(we gotta get him out of here)

We could throw him in the dungeon. We could let him rot in jail.

We could drag him to the ocean—have him eaten by a whale.

[kunaiman]

3. We could throw him in the Tigris, let him float a while, then we'll all sit back and watch him meet a hungry crocodile

4. We could put him on a camel's back and send him off to Ur with a cowboy hat without a brim, a boot without a spur

[forthoutoffive]

5. We could give him jelly doughnuts, take em all away

6 We could fill his ears with cheese balls and his nostrils with sorbet

[supreme-leader-stoat]

7. We could use him as a footstool

Or a table to play Scrabble on

And tie him up and beat him up and throw him out of Babylon.

[ghostrider-02]

I like it!

It's sneaky!

[redemptioninchaos]

And it just

[ghostrider-02]

MIGHT

[redemptioninchaos]

Work!

[tinobalcoochie]

[ineedacwtch]

[ineedacwtch]

[nickyflowers]

taylor swift is neither tortured nor is she any kind of poet lol

[nickyflowers]

ohh i get it now, she's the one torturing poets

[comradesaucegay]

[ineedacwtch]

Somehow she released this album on the 200th anniversary of Lord Byron’s death seemingly unintentionally. I’m not a fan of either but at least T Swift hasn’t killed any kids through parental neglect so maybe the terrible “poetry” is an extra little punishment for Byron to add to his time in hell.

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

I have the most random and oddball question... What would be some expletive type language in Welsh?

I'm playing a dragon in my D&D group who is from this fantasy world's equivalent of Wales and I want to add some flavor when he is fighting that he starts using bits of his mother-tongue instead of Common.

It's easy enough to find a random list of words, but without cultural context I have no clue what would be a proper equivalent of, for example "fuck off you asshole"... I probably am putting "too much" thought into it, but I'm a cultural anthropologist, so it bugs me to not think too much about it.

A funny quirk of Welsh is that we actually tend to swear in English when we need to - because one of the social arenas it survived in was through the chapels, the closest you'd get are things that in English you'd probably associate with your granny saying, or those sad little Christian youth camps in America. One of my favourites is Nêfi blŵ, which is literally just the Welsh transliteration of the words 'navy blue' said in a Welsh accent. Why is this a swear? Unknown. I presume someone somewhere hated the colour.

However, there are a couple:

Sweary

Sguthan/ysguthan: this is probably equivalent to 'bitch', it's certainly gendered the same way and has similar weight. Except much as 'bitch' literally just means a dog, sguthan means 'woodpigeon'. Why is this a swear? Unknown

Cach i fant: fuck off. 'Shit off', literally. Tbh though I don't actually know anyone who would actually use this. Mileage can and will vary wildly (keep an eye on the notes for other Welsh speakers chiming in), but this one always felt a bit like a sheep's eyeball to me, to use a Pratchett-ism. Like something Golwg would use to Appeal To The Youth. But, it is real, and does work.

Dos i ffwcio dy hunan: go fuck yourself. Now THIS one I use

Twll tin bob ____: Every ____ is an asshole. Naturally, the phrase in Wales is 'Twll tin bob Sais', but substitute Sais for the group of your choice.

Cêr y diawl: go to hell. Literally, 'go to the devil', with devil there being a reasonable stand-in for any devil you wish, not just, like, Satan.

And of course, Wenglish can provide:

Be'r ffyc 'dy hwnna: what the fuck is that

Pwy'r ffyc 'dy hwnna: who the fuck is that

etc

Non-Sweary

Bois bach a mawr: okay listen this is going to sound like I'm joshing you but I swear this is real. It's used by an older generation, admittedly, but even younger generations will say 'Bois bach' sometimes. It, uh. It literally means "Big and little boys". Or just "little boys". Just a sort of general mild exclamation. Or what you say when you sit down and your knees complain. Um.

Ych a fi: gross. Can also be Wenglished to 'Ych a ffycin fi' which is, you know, fucking gross.

Be' ti 'di 'neud?: what have you done?

Be' sy'n bod 'da ti?: What is wrong with you?

Cô ni off, bois!: Off we go, lads (gender neutral)!

There's probably a million I'm forgetting and will think of as I try to sleep tonight, but hopefully these will tide you over. Keep an eye on the notes, I expect others will chime in with further suggestions!

[dreamduality]

[diamond-hoo-ha-man]

i thought this was a hospital drama why does he have a shotgun?!??!?

[ulysseus]

It's a really, really good hospital drama

[elkian]

I'm so glad I turned on the Audio bc it turns out this is set to Boney M's Rasputin and is basically perfectly synced

[nancynancydrewdrewdrew]

I see Shaggy went to the waverly academy snack bar

[words-and-coffee]

Alice Te Punga Somerville, Always Italicise: How to Write While Colonised - Kupu rere kē

[ineedacwtch]

BRB calling my brother in law…the one who used to collect stamps.

[nowyoukno]

[fangirling-so-hard-rn]

Crows are scary They

use tools

Can be taught to speak (like parrots)

Have huge brains for birds

like seriously their brain-to-body size ratio is equal to that of a chimpanzee

They vocalize anger, sadness, or happiness in response to things

they are scary smart at solving puzzles

some crows stay with their mates until one of them dies

they can remember faces

SIDENOTE HERE BECAUSE HOLY SHIT.  They did an experiment where these guys wore masks and some of them fucked with crows.  Pretty soon the crows recognized the masks = douchebag.  But the nice guys with masks they left alone.  THEN, OH WE’RE NOT DONE, NO SIR crows that WEREN’T EVEN IN THE EXPERIMENT AND NEVER SAW THE MASK BEFORE knew about mask-dudes and attacked them on sight.  THEY PASSED ON THE FUCKING INFORMATION TO THEIR CROW BUDDIES.

They remember places where crows were killed by farmers and change their migration patterns.

Guys I’m really scared of crows now. (q) 

[doctormemelordmd]

Yeah but have you seen this 

[stultiloquentia]

A colleague of my dad’s lives next to a lake, and looked out the window one morning to see a duck trapped in the ice. A crow swooped down. “Oh hell,” she thought, expecting carnage, because crows are opportunists. But the crow chipped at the ice with its beak until the duck was free.

[warwyrd-deactivated20170724]

Idk of this counts but a few crows saved me from a magpie swooping attack once ,they’re bros who can tell when magpies are being unreasonable and need to chill

[reallymisscoffee]

I love crows so damn much. When I was fifteen, I hit a pretty serious bout of depression, to the point I was in my room for months. Well, a family of crows made a nest in a tree outside my window. There were two parents and two chicks. One chick was healthy and strong. One was weak, and had a caw like something being strained. It sounded more like a rooster crowing and so my parents jokingly named him ‘Buck’.Well… months passed and Buck’s sibling was taught to fly. His parents focused on the sibling because the sibling was strong. The father stayed behind to try and teach Buck, but I saw him try to fly, fail, and crash to the floor. His father helped him back up into the tree.

Every day, I would watch Buck from my window until one day I opened it and started talking to him. He was small and gangly and he couldn’t caw right. His feathers were all over the place and I felt a kinship. So I made a deal with him. I told him that if he could do it, if he could fly, then I could find the strength to get up. Well… near the end of the season, after talking with him every day, I finally saw him get out of the nest. He went to the edge of his branch, braced himself, and jumped… and just before he hit the ground, he soared back up into the sky. I cheered harder than I ever had before.

That winter, Buck left the area. I was crestfallen. I felt like I’d lost a friend. But I was so damn proud of him. 

Cut to the next spring? I’m walking up the driveway one day when suddenly I hear a sound… a broken caw. I look up, and Buck is sitting in a tree above my head. He stared at me and puffed his feathers, then hopped down in front of me and cawed again. I was so damn thrilled, and I told him how proud I was of him. He ruffled his feathers and then soared off into his old tree. 

That summer? I heard two broken caws. One from Buck… and one from his chick.

Cut to ten years later? We have a family of crows who all have a very distinct caw and they come here and spend every spring, summer, and fall on our property. Buck still greets me every spring.

[ruggie-bucchis]

that last reply made me wanna cry. that’s so beautiful.

[avianawareness]

Don’t forget the Russian Crow SLEDDING DOWN A ROOF not once, but twice. 

[odpixel]

this one morning i kept hearing really loud caws, i remember it was like 5am, LIKE REALLY LOUD AND ANNOYING AND AGGRESSIVE, so loud that i could hear it through a closed window, and i eventually went outside to check it out. there was a crow on my front lawn, it had an injury on its head and couldn’t fly and there were two other crows circling right above it, and they were cawing like mad. 

i tried to get close and take a better look and one of them dived super low and tried to attack me. so i went back in the house and chopped some sliced raw meat and tossed it at him from a distance.

a few more times later, very soon after, they could tell i was trying to help, and did not attack me. i was “allowed” to walk up close and pick him up, he couldn’t drink water properly so i had to dip my finger in a bowl and stick it in his mouth.

i did this few times a day and it went on for about a week before he disappeared, i thought he recovered and left, but he came back the next day and lands on me, and i see him around the block quite often, and he would come sit on my shoulder for a few minutes and then fly away again. i feel like i’ve adopted a son.

[lilith-knight]

Best birbs !!

[221cbakerstreet]

your son is Beautiful and Strong

[solitarelee]

every time I see this post it has different crow stories and every time I reblog it again because all crow stories are good stories

[betheothergirl-deactivated20180]

Like, I wouldn’t want to be on bad terms with a crow, but they are a really smart animal, they aren’t scary You just want to be nice to them because they will know and they will remember, and they will pay you back if you treat them a certain way.

As a side note, I volunteered at a rehab (Hope for Wildlife), where they were rehabbing a crow with a broken wing–who was named Russell Crow. He kept pulling his bandage off so a sleeve was cut off some old clothing and put on him like a little sweater. 

[blackwoolncrown]

!!!!

[birbiebabies]

I don’t think I’ll ever not reblog this. This posts makes me cry and smile at the same time.

[gaymerlvl-pharmercy]

He’s so handsome!!

[witchofthegermanforest]

I would trust a crow with my life

[tea-leaves-and-cheeze]

This is your regularly scheduled crow appreciation post

[varangianviper]

I love crows!

[chablemisspell]

moral of the story: crows my beloved?

[void-and-vortex]

@spef

[teavyy]

crow love and appreciation post

[nonasuch]

A fun update to the ongoing Reddit meltdown: r/femalefashionadvice has, after polling their users, reopened to only accept posts about 18th century fashion.

[curliestofcrowns]

[triflesandparsnips]

[alexaloraetheris]

See, THIS is why Reddit refugees were welcomed with open arms.

[kamikaze-kumquat]

I mean seriously. Twitter refugees came here with "UGH! Thid id what we've been reduced to!" attitudes despite them stealing from us for years. Reddit folks are like lost lambs.

[kdramastuff]

[drst]

A question for the ages.