tonsil stone collector and connoisseur

avid milk drinker 🥛 and happy madison film enjoyer 🏌‍♂️ my biggest fears are parasites 🦠 and stepping on a crack needle 💉 in no particular order🤯 my lifes work: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5FXXJdc2u5FLRXvTsaF4aw?si=-RYOZ4SySUSKRbLJ0a_dcQ&utm_source=copy-link

[sighinastorm]

Go to a furry convention dressed as an 18th century fur trapper. Longrifle, jawtraps, chains, fur hat, big coat made of sewn-together pelts of different polyester neons...

[chacha-tortuga]

[sighinastorm]

Man. You get it. :^)

[exitwound]

interviewer: can you explain this gap in your resume?

me: mhm so that’s called a lacuna. it refers to when manuscripts have missing parts, lost to time. for example, the epic of gilgamesh has

[jeanritchie]

i love sending people my totaled car as a reaction image it’s so funny

[jeanritchie]

[goflowolfog]

[emotargaryen]

one of the tweets of all time to me

[1794]

mustard snob canon

[messsssmer]

"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?

[fireknightqueelign]

thy mother

[messsssmer]

Art thou for fucking real

[wifegideonnav]

gonna be honest i don’t know how many more ‘enter the 6 digit code we sent to your phone’s i got left in me

[taraljc]

What gets me is that it's not just forcing you to use dual factor authentication, but them taking away the simple act of having me log in with a password. I don't want it using my biometrics. I don't even want to use my pin. I keep having to circumvent the hoops technology is forcing on me to get to where I want to go and go back to the one hoop because the one hoop works for me and they're like nope we want you to give you more hoops to jump through You have to have the hoops and I'm like I REALLY DO NOT.

10 years ago when dual factor authentication first started making our lives difficult I observed that it was easier in the United States of America to purchase a gun and it was to sign into your Google account from a new phone. The fact that it's only gotten worse in every possible way in every direction from where we are now to the dawn of time stretching to the eventual heat death of the universe is part of the slow creeping death of my ability to function, or even the desire to function rather than settling for mere existence.

Also they're forcing us to have our phone in our hand while we are all so simultaneously on our laptops and that's so fucked up. I don't want to have to type in a code from memory. I have ADHD and dyscalcula. It never ever works. I want to cut and paste. This is dumb. We should start again.

[transmechanicus]

the app i HAVE to use to pay rent doesn’t do passwords or accounts it ONLY does a 2FA check and i hate it so fucking much

[deadpowol]

[tahthetrickster]

[machine-unlearning]

god I'm such a slut for Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce *decides it’s inaccurate to refer to myself as a slut in light of my minimal sexual activity* if The Enemy discovered my ardor for Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce, they would gain a significant strategic advantage

[punishedsaints]

[dogpuppy]

[dogpuppy]

[despazito]

[cybelusreverie]

notice that no one on MTV Cribs has an emergency eyewash station

[spaceytingz]

[status-quo-hater]

I think one of the funniest abortion stances I've heard was from my parents neighbor. He's a like, hard-core libertarian viking larper guy who is very tall and very fat and very bald.

He believes a fetus is human with a soul, but also its "basically attacking the woman's body" so if she wants to get rid of it, that's "basically self-defense". He compared it to shooting a home invader. So he supports abortion not as healthcare, but as killing a baby in self-defense

[insecuregodcomplex]