Other Interests: To Be Hero X, Honkai Star Rail, The Rookie, The Pitt, Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint, Bungo Stray Dogs, Genshin Impact, Gravity Falls, Moriarty the Patriot, Star Wars, Ninjago, Transformers, Tensura, World Trigger, The Apothecary Diaries, Solo Leveling, Haikyuu!! & more.
Feel free to talk to me or drop an ask! Especially if it’s about tbhx or hsr!! I don’t bite :]
My Tags:
#tbhx star cluster 💫: This is my custom tag for all my thoughts and analyses about To Be Hero X, my new favourite show.
#hsr star cluster 🔭: This is my custom tag for all my analyses, rambles and thoughts on Honkai Star Rail. It also has my thoughts + analyses on Phaidei/Myphai.
#the constellation analyses: Sometimes I post random thoughts/shitpost/opinions/speculations on my obsessions here.
#the constellation writes: I write fics/drabbles/random ideas for a fic occasionally and post them here.
#the constellation speaks: I post my personal thoughts on here. Just random thoughts I have from time to time!
By the way, you can improve your executive function. You can literally build it like a muscle.
Yes, even if you're neurodivergent. I don't have ADHD, but it is allegedly a thing with ADHD as well. And I am autistic, and after a bunch of nerve damage (severe enough that I was basically housebound for 6 months), I had to completely rebuild my ability to get my brain to Do Things from what felt like nearly scratch.
This is specifically from ADDitude magazine, so written specifically for ADHD (and while focused in large part on kids, also definitely includes adults and adult activities):
Executive functioning skills range from working memory to cognitive flexibility to inhibitory control, and beyond. They power our daily func
Here's a link on this for autism (though as an editor wow did that title need an editor lol):
Practical Strategies for Enhancing Executive Functioning Difficulties in Adults With Autism - Living with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) as
Resources on this aren't great because they're mainly aimed at neurotypical therapists or parents of neurdivergent children. There's worksheets you can do that help a lot too or thought work you can do to sort of build the neuro-infrastructure for tasks.
But a lot of the stuff is just like. fun. Pulling from both the first article and my own experience:
Play games or video games where you have to make a lot of decisions. Literally go make a ton of picrews or do online dress-up dolls if you like. It helped me.
Art, especially forms of art that require patience, planning ahead, or in contrast improvisation
Listening to longform storytelling without visuals, e.g. just listening regularly to audiobooks or narrative podcasts, etc.
Meditation
Martial arts
Sports in general
Board games like chess or Catan (I actually found a big list of what board games are good for building what executive functioning skills here)
Woodworking
Cooking
If you're bad at time management play games or video games with a bunch of timers
Things can be easier. You might always have a disability around this (I certainly always will), but it can be easier. You do not have to be this stuck forever.
i think it’s silly to be ashamed of your art because it’s not in a museum and of your voice because it’s not selling out stadiums. there will always be people who enjoy and appreciate what you can do.
I talked with someone who works in book publishing, and they mentioned they get a lot of AI slop these days. I asked how they know what's human-written, and they said that there's one thing that will reveal AI slop without error, and that's the author not knowing their own creation.
A real author can talk about their story for hours. They love to elaborate every character, every twist, every detail. Because those existed in their head long before they ever made it to the paper. They were loved before they were written.
AI slop wasn't. It was just vomited into existence.
Someone who generates their story with AI will never bond with their story the way real writers do. That's why they may not know what to say when they're asked why did the character do this, or even remember the scene in the first place. It's something they read, not something they wrote. And to a writer, those are not the same.
There's a unique bond between the creator and the creation. If your writing doesn't come of you, you'll always lack that.
I keep hearing soon we won't be able to tell. And perhaps, in a superficial sense, that's true. But there is a difference. It's not em dashes or repeated words. It's whether the story was made by someone who loves it and cares about it.
If the writer's eyes light up when asked why did the character do that? and they start their very own Ted Talk about that specific scene...
Okay, but… we only have 5 episodes left before the end of season one, and I just need to say how deeply concerned I already am for my mental health when we get to episode 24's cliffhanger.
It’s LHO we’re talking about, and let’s be real, he’s probably saving the worst for last. If you hadn’t thought about that yet… well, now you have.
Phew, I finally watched EP 8 and 9. Please note that there is spoilers for BOTH EP 8 and 9 below.
I decided to take a long break from watching and speculating on tbhx cuz it was getting too much for me.
- I wonder how did Luo managed to get 10 Trust value? Where did it come from? How did it manifest? Same with Cyan after she ran away from the orphanage, how did she still have a Trust Value of 9?
- Also, the orphanage leader dude definitely took some Fear booster thingy cuz there’s freakin zombies everywhere in that orphanage and he seems to be the only one in control
- Also Cyan said Luo is ‘no longer here’. Did the DOS manager made some sort of backdoor deal with the orphanage leader after finding him so that Cyan won’t go looking for him? So that DOS can have her fully focus on being a hero and not searching for Luo? They must’ve offered a pretty good deal for the orphanage leader to leave her with DOS. And maybe also because he doesn’t wanna ruin his reputation completely so he’s choosing not to pursue her.
- I love Cyan’s and Luo’s parallels, one known as a lucky person and the other an unlucky one, maybe when they’re together their luck balances the other out.
- Also (with regards to Liu Zhen and his boss’s interaction) definitely seems like thinking or saying anything bad about heroes gets you ostracised by society. I wonder if it’s because somehow it’s taboo because if enough people talk bad about heroes, thus sowing doubt, their Trust value turns into Fear value and we’d get another Zero? And so whatever missayings about the heroes gets stamped down hard?
- On that note, Queen said she wanted to overturn the Trust Value system in the news, and with the random person throwing around those brochures while screaming ‘Accept Fear!’. Maybe Liu Zhen is working with the Spotlight Organisation?
- And again with the consistent theme of each of our heroes being guided by others (especially Yang Cheng) on what they should be. Even in the final part where Luo and Cyan try to escape the orphanage, it’s Luo pulling her along, leading the way rather than her taking charge of her own decision.
- As some people pointed out, I am also in the belief that the first person who gave her the coin is X, X guiding our heroes indirectly hehe we love to see it!
- Speculations aside, I love that lil sound effect they play when Cyan gets startled hahah! She’s so adorable and growing on me pretty quickly.
I’m just rewatching one of the 3.3 cutscene for when Phainon cuts Aquila in half, like he was so sexy and cool and hot during this scene. Too bad Mydei wasn’t here, he’d find it hot :(
Also!! I just realised when I was rewatching the boss fight:
Phainon drawing strength and remembering his role from Mydei’s words to him before he left for Castrum Kremnos, even though he’s in so much pain, angry, sad, in anguish etc.
Like we already have Trianne, Aglaea, Anaxa and Castorice gone within less than a week probably, so he’s practically reliving his trauma, but yet he’s doing everything he can to lead the Chrysos Heirs, drawing strength from Mydei’s words to him by repeating them outloud 😭🥹 Oh Phainon, Mydei would be so so proud of you 😭😭😭😭🥹🥹🥹
I’m concerned about him and at the same time so proud of him for doing his best to keep it together. Trying his very hardest to not be swept under by the insane emotional pain he’s definitely packed away in his heart, remembering the lesson he learned from Nikador’s trial when he ended up being swept up by wanting revenge for his loved ones and friends in Aedes Elysiae.
No thoughts head empty, just thinking about how maybe when Mydei first started fighting on his own again (against the black tide) he also had to watch himself a lot more now that he no longer had Phainon to protect his back or defend him, so in the first few months he died a lot more than he did before, having to get used to fighting entirely alone again.
Just like before when he was stuck in the sea of souls fighting for his life in every moment for years. And he starts missing Phainon a lot more.
Sure, he’s used to dying by now but to go against the flow of the river of souls to return to the land of the living is no easy feat either. And now he has to go through that process more and more bc Phainon isn’t around to cut down the number of times he dies in battle.
Without their playful banter, his lonely existence becomes ever evident once more, the days and months blurring together until he’s unable to tell how long it’s been. But it doesn’t matter now because the Flame Reaver is aiming for Okhema, and he needs to protect Phainon & the rest of his friends from this fiend, this scoundrel who has stood in their way many times. He never knew he could feel relief and dread simultaneously until Castorice informed him of the Flame Reaver’s whereabouts. He hadn’t heard the sound of another’s voice in what seemed like eons.
He swore the world stopped for a second the moment his eyes landed on that familiar figure.
Phainon. The Deliverer.
Mydei had never anticipated that they’d meet again like this. As dire the situation is, he thanks fate for granting him one more chance to lay eyes on the man that had become an inseparable part of his life.
His equal, his other half. Mydei’s heart clenches in protest as he calls for them to leave immediately, tearing his gold eyes away from the saviour of their doomed world, toward the enemy. Mydei lets the brief exchange between him and his beloved power him, fiery determination, unbending will surging through his veins like fire, to eliminate the evil that stands in their way.
you hold space for everyone else’s storms - their silence, their spirals, their rage, their regrets. but the moment you even crack, it’s suddenly too much. too needy. too intense. too “ugh.”
they love your empathy. they just don’t want to deal with the cost of it. they love that you’re soft. until your softness needs something back.
but that’s not a you problem.
that’s what happens when people are comfortable taking from you, but never prepared to carry you. you deserve the kind of people who don’t flinch when you fall apart. who don’t treat your emotions like a mood swing. who don’t disappear when your softness becomes real and not just aesthetic.
I see now. Penacony was just the experimental phase. Amphoreus is the real deal emotional devastation.
Like Phainon is one of my favourite Ampho characters but I can’t really bring myself to be excited about his first run because of the entire 3.3 story. Am I the only one?
