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@iosyncratic
i’m reading why does he do that and this last part has been ON FIRE, i am hollering in my house.
while i’m talking about this book again i should mention that, since it’s an abuse resource, Why Does He Do That is available to read for free as a pdf, and i’d highly recommend it.
[Alt text: Is He Doing It On Purpose?
When a client of mine tells me that he became abusive because he lost control of himself, I ask him why he didn’t do something even worse. For example, I might say, “You called her a fucking whore, you grabbed the phone out of her hand and whipped it across the room, and then you gave her a shove and she fell down. There she was at your feet, where it would have been easy to kick her in the head. Now, you have just finished telling me that you were ‘totally out of control’ at that time, but you didn’t kick her. What stopped you?” And the client can always give me a reason. Here are some common explanations:
“I wouldn’t want to cause her a serious injury.”
“I realized one of the children was watching.”
“I was afraid someone would call the police.”
“I could kill her if I did that.”
“The fight was getting loud, and I was afraid neighbors would hear.”
And the most frequent response of all:
“Jesus, I wouldn’t do that. I would never do something like that to her.”
The response that I almost never heard—I remember hearing it twice in fifteen years—was: “I don’t know.”
These ready answers strip the cover off of my clients’ loss-of-control excuse. While a man is on an abusive rampage, verbally or physically, his mind maintains awareness of a number of questions: “Am I doing something that other people could find out about, so it could make me look bad? Am I doing anything that could get me in legal trouble? Could I get hurt myself? Am I doing anything that I myself consider too cruel, gross, or violent?”
A critical insight seeped into me from working with my first few dozen clients: An abuser almost never does anything that he himself considers morally unacceptable. He may hide what he does because he thinks other people would disagree with it, but he feels justified inside. I can’t remember a client ever having said to me: “There’s no way I can defend what I did. It was just totally wrong.” He invariably has a reason that he considers good enough. In short, an abuser’s core problem is that he has a distorted sense of right and wrong. /End alt text]
Old Growth by Mitch Epstein (2021–2023)
Important PSA if you have Adobe Acrobat installed on your computer - it installs Microsoft Copilot, even if you've removed it in the past
I went to right-click a file today and was met with an "Ask Copilot" prompt, despite having diligently removed every trace of the scourge from my computer any time it's ever been installed in the past. When I went and looked in the program list and indeed found "Copilot," it said it was installed today, 4/16/26.
Enraged and confused because I have Windows Updates turned off for this machine, don't install anything unless I can check what's in the patches, and haven't ran any updates since the end of March, I went rooting around in the logs and found that the culprit was... the latest update for Acrobat.
I went to their stupid support website, and their stupid chatbot confirmed it:
Honestly Acrobat is a terrible PDF reader/viewer anyway, it's just been installed on this computer since college and I hadn't previously bothered to remove it. But if you're in the same boat, or if you have previously been forced to use it for work/school, please be aware that this POS puts Copilot back on your computer without permission or notification.
Also, there is a nasty exploit in all versions of acrobat from before this week, so if you have an old version and don't use it, just uninstall.
Edge does pdf reading just fine if you're on windows.
Everyone Is Cheating Their Way Through College
For anyone unfamiliar with Paulo Freire's Pedagogy of the Oppressed, the entire thesis is that traditional educational models promote oppression by removing students' agency in their own learning. Freire argues that currently education functions as a "banking model" - teachers are the holders of knowledge, and students are empty vessels, waiting to have that knowledge put into their heads like a piggy bank. This reinforces a passive attitude towards information, not seeking and understanding it on your own terms, but waiting for a "banker" to deposit it into your head.
Instead, Freire proposes that teachers and students act as co-creators of knowledge, where students become active participants in their own learning through questions and dialogue. Teachers are also open to changing their understanding of topics in the process of critical dialogue - the goal is not "student learns Fact A and memorizes it as presented," but instead the goal is the knowledge itself, discovered collaboratively by teacher and student, who are acting with empathy and respect towards each other. This also starts the process of the oppressed being able and empowered to question structures of power, take agency, and actively participate in the transformation of society.
So, the irony of writing an AI essay on critical pedagogy is actually insane; because it's essentially the extrapolated endpoint of Freire's arguments that our current educational system creates passive receptacles who not only can't think critically in an educational context, but also become the perfect citizens for a world that doesn't want us questioning structures of power, to view those in power as we viewed our teachers - deliverers of indisputable facts that must be memorized and regurgitated because they command it, and not co-creators of true understanding.
when you remember what happened to the word "woke" you'll never stop being mad. woke originally meant to "stay alert" during antiblack racial injustices that black individuals face and now it got turned into meme shit and it's genuinely infuriating when antiblack systemic oppression is still ongoing across the world.
seeing nonblack leftists use the word ironically without at least knowing the origin of it is blood boiling. I'm tired of black phrases and slang being turned into "memes" it's turning black culture and awareness into a joke.
ppl did the same thing with "Karen" too. "Karen" as a slang term doesn't mean "white woman who asks to see the manager" it was specifically for white women who weaponize their whiteness to terrorize black people in public. like complaining about the service isn't being a "Karen," being a Karen is when you call the cops because there's a black teenager playing pokemon go in the park
crossposting from bsky - glad I stopped using spotify when I did and that I unlinked it from my discord, but still
[ reddit thread | bsky post ]
Everything after (and including!) the question mark is the identifier. Destroy it!
Link Cleaner is a web app for removing tracking code, search parameters, and other junk from URL links.
one of The Many problems with how the general public conceptualizes addiction and recovery is that "rock bottom" makes a really good narrative beat, it's a nice and dramatic second act low point in your classic three act structure to give a character something to make them reevaluate and get their life in order, and the human brain sure likes holding on to Fun Narratives, so even well-intentioned people who don't consider themselves to believe in punitive measures get it stuck into their heads that thee way that people get sober is by experiencing some kind of reckoning of harsh consequences (losing a job or home, overdosing, being rejected by loved ones, getting desperate and feeling driven to do something really awful to keep using, etc). when, if you think about it for like two seconds, basically no one in the world is going to juuust about survive their own personal worst case scenario and think "wow, now would be a really great time to give up my only coping mechanism and voluntarily induce a medical emergency for the next several weeks," that kind of thing is far more likely to just immediately make everything Much worse.
I once saw a parenting blog or something that was written with a very earnest and measured tone seriously give the advice "if your teen is struggling with addiction and won't respond to anything you do then your best move would be to kick them out and cut them off so they run out of other options more quickly" and I just sat there in a kind of mute horror for a few minutes afterwards. like. no that's actually how you kill people. if a child is already in the midst of a mental health crisis, and you then deliberately engineer the situation to give them a second crisis, that is how you kill someone. I cannot stress this enough.
"When you push addicts to the brink of death, they quit and recover. That's what I've seen from all of the living recovering addicts!" [Bullethole_plane.jpg]
what I mean: "sexual intercourse" is as much a social construct as "romantic courtship," and you discover this very quickly as a queer person if you try to talk to able bodied straight cis people who literally think the only thing that counts as Actual Sex is penis-in-vagina penetration, like they call oral "foreplay" it's so dire. various people have a lot of vested interest in cleanly defining "sex" vs "not sex" for a whole slew of reasons (ex. censorship dodging and enforcing, conferring the social clout of virginity and prowess, finding and closing loopholes about premarital sex, deciding what relationships "count" as serious partnerships, ligating what is general assault vs sexual assault vs Something That's Definitely Probably Fine And Not Sexual At All, Actually, etc.), and it's really not something you can just fall back on as obvious common sense that people are dumb for questioning.
what I say: sex isn't real and you can't have it
Rima Hassan, a Palestinian member of the EU Parliament was arrested by France today for retweeting the above tweet
https://www.reuters.com/world/french-far-left-member-european-parliament-rima-hassan-held-police-custody-2026-04-02/
learning how to react less because why should i have to lose my mind just to be understood
real
when James Baldwin said I can’t be a pessimist because I’m alive
when James Baldwin said to be a pessimist means that you have agreed that human life is an academic matter. So I am forced to be an optimist. I am forced to believe that we can survive whatever we must survive.
Maybe I'm not paying enough attention, but I haven't seen anything online or in the news about this and it's bad. Consider that the Palestinian governments and several benevolent humanitarian organizations are considered terrorists by Israel which would mean Palestinians are designated terrorists by default.
Legislation initiated by far-right Otzma Yehudit party drew mounting criticism from opponents and rights groups as it moved through the Knes
An excerpt:
"The measure allows courts to impose the death penalty without a request from prosecutors, and without requiring unanimity, instead permitting a simple majority decision. Military courts in the occupied West Bank would also be empowered to hand down death sentences, with the defence minister able to submit an opinion. For Palestinians under occupation, the bill would close off avenues for appeal or clemency, while prisoners tried inside Israel could see their sentences commuted to life imprisonment."
Is “America First” truly among the priorities of the US government today?, he asked. Read more at straitstimes.com. Read more at straitstime
letter behind the read-more
In the name of God, the Compassionate, the Merciful
To the people of the United States of America, and to all those who, amid a flood of distortions and manufactured narratives, continue to seek the truth and aspire to a better life:
Iran – by this very name, character, and identity – is one of the oldest continuous civilisations in human history. Despite its historical and geographical advantages at various times, Iran has never, in its modern history, chosen the path of aggression, expansion, colonialism, or domination.
Even after enduring occupation, invasion, and sustained pressure from global powers–and despite possessing military superiority over many of its neighbours – Iran has never initiated a war. Yet it has resolutely and bravely repelled those who have attacked it.
The Iranian people harbour no enmity towards other nations, including the people of America, Europe, or neighboring countries. Even in the face of repeated foreign interventions and pressures throughout their proud history, Iranians have consistently drawn a clear distinction between governments and the peoples they govern. This is a deeply rooted principle in Iranian culture and collective consciousness–not a temporary political stance.
For this reason, portraying Iran as a threat is neither consistent with historical reality nor with present-day observable facts. Such a perception is the product of political and economic whims of the powerful – the need to manufacture an enemy in order to justify pressure, maintain military dominance, sustain the arms industry, and control strategic markets. In such an environment, if a threat does not exist, it is invented.
Within this same framework, the United States has concentrated the largest number of its forces, bases, and military capabilities around Iran – a country that, at least since the founding of the United States, has never initiated a war.
Recent American aggressions launched from these very bases have demonstrated how threatening such a military presence truly is. Naturally, no country confronted with such conditions would forgo strengthening its defensive capabilities. What Iran has done – and continues to do – is a measured response grounded in legitimate self-defence, and by no means an initiation of war or aggression.
Relations between Iran and the United States were not originally hostile, and early interactions between the Iranian and American people were not marred with hostility or tension. The turning point, however, was the 1953 coup d’etat – an illegal American intervention aimed at preventing the nationalisation of Iran’s own resources. That coup disrupted Iran’s democratic process, reinstated dictatorship, and sowed deep distrust among Iranians towards US policies. This distrust deepened further with America’s support for the Shah’s regime, its backing of Saddam Hussein during the imposed war of the 1980s, the imposition of the longest and most comprehensive sanctions in modern history, and ultimately, unprovoked military aggression – twice, in the midst of negotiations – against Iran.
Yet all these pressures have failed to weaken Iran. On the contrary, the country has grown stronger in many areas: literacy rates have tripled – from roughly 30 per cent before the Islamic Revolution to over 90 per cent today; higher education has expanded dramatically; significant advances have been achieved in modern technology; healthcare services have improved; and infrastructure has developed at a pace and scale incomparable to the past. These are measurable, observable realities that stand independent of fabricated narratives.
At the same time, the destructive and inhumane impact of sanctions, war, and aggression on the lives of the resilient Iranian people must not be underestimated. The continuation of military aggression and recent bombings profoundly affect people’s lives, attitudes, and perspectives. This reflects a fundamental human truth: when war inflicts irreparable harm on lives, homes, cities, and futures, people will not remain indifferent toward those responsible.
This raises a fundamental question: Exactly which of the American people’s interests are truly being served by this war? Was there any objective threat from Iran to justify such behaviour? Does the massacre of innocent children, the destruction of cancer-treatment pharmaceutical facilities, or boasting about bombing a country “back to the stone ages” serve any purpose other than further damaging the United States’ global standing?
Iran pursued negotiations, reached an agreement, and fulfilled all its commitments. The decision to withdraw from that agreement, escalate toward confrontation, and launch two acts of aggression in the midst of negotiations were destructive choices made by the US government – choices that served the delusions of a foreign aggressor.
Attacking Iran’s vital infrastructure – including energy and industrial facilities – directly targets the Iranian people. Beyond constituting a war crime, such actions carry consequences that extend far beyond Iran’s borders. They generate instability, increase human and economic costs, and perpetuate cycles of tension, planting seeds of resentment that will endure for years. This is not a demonstration of strength; it is a sign of strategic bewilderment and an inability to achieve a sustainable solution.
Is it not also the case that America has entered this aggression as a proxy for Israel, influenced and manipulated by that regime? Is it not true that Israel, by manufacturing an Iranian threat, seeks to divert global attention away from its crimes toward the Palestinians? Is it not evident that Israel now aims to fight Iran to the last American soldier and the last American taxpayer dollar–shifting the burden of its delusions onto Iran, the region, and the United States itself in pursuit of illegitimate interests?
Is “America First” truly among the priorities of the US government today?
I invite you to look beyond the machinery of misinformation – an integral part of this aggression – and instead speak with those who have visited Iran. Observe the many accomplished Iranian immigrants – educated in Iran – who now teach and conduct research at the world’s most prestigious universities, or contribute to the most advanced technology firms in the West. Do these realities align with the distortions you are being told about Iran and its people?
Today, the world stands at crossroads. Continuing along the path of confrontation is more costly and futile than ever before. The choice between confrontation and engagement is both real and consequential; its outcome will shape the future for generations to come. Throughout its millennia of proud history, Iran has outlasted many aggressors. All that remains of them are tarnished names in history, while Iran endures–resilient, dignified, and proud.
This is the average American's mentality toward countries like Iran. The way they completely get everything wrong and admit they know nothing, yet are still willing to voice their incorrect opinions out loud without even bothering to look up basic facts. I'm sorry to Pezeshkian, but this is the kind of cattle he is dealing with.
The average American seems content to sit in their ignorance, so long as their comfort is never disturbed.
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