✦ PROJECT HAIL MARY by andy weir —in the style of a 70s sci-fi novel.
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NASA
we're not kids anymore.

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
YOU ARE THE REASON

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Claire Keane
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Not today Justin
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Monterey Bay Aquarium
Today's Document
$LAYYYTER

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@iwritebetterthanispeak
✦ PROJECT HAIL MARY by andy weir —in the style of a 70s sci-fi novel.
One of the effect of elementary watson being a woman on sherlock is that hes always making caveats about murder suspects like a man caved his skull in. Or a woman. women can also cave skulls in 👍 he set the building on fire. Or she. I would never imply women cant set building on fire
I’m gonna be sobbing in that theatre as soon as I sit down
Ok I just read project hail mary and no one has ever platonic soulmated as hard as Grace and Rocky. There’s literally a red string of fate (billions of sun-eating space bacteria) tying them together. In the movie trailer he looks at him like this
I cannot contain my love for them
thought about my OC yesterday, thought about my OC today, will think about my OC tomorrow
db cooper got isekai’d by the plane and hes in the elf world now with all the money and parachutes he stole
people trying to insist a fandom is tiny when it /only/ has a few thousand works on ao3 meanwhile my current fandom is a sixteen book series and has several hundred fewer works than goncharov, a movie that, and i cannot stress this enough, doesn’t even exist
#measuring the size of fandoms based on their goncharov index#this has been a useless text post you may now resume your normal programming#rote has a goncharov index of 0.63#for perspective ofmd has an index of 26.5#spn’s is 360.8#the cosmere is 2.26 for a fantasy book comparison#i am very normal
The Goncharov Index, everyone.
Equinox
You check your watch. “Oh hey,” you say, “it’s Equinox.” “It happens twice a year, my dear,” I say, and start upon the scientific explanation of the seasons changing, and the tilting of the Earth. You interrupt me – “Angel, that is not the point. At solstice, day and night are at their most extreme. But light can only go so far; the same for dark. Today, there’s balance once again upon the Earth with equal parts of light and dark bestowed on all.” And then you turn to toss your bread at wary ducks. I stand beside you, and I once more am amazed at how you transcend pedantry with simple truth. I think about the whiteness of your sunlit flat, and how I isolate myself in dust and books. A contradiction – or a sense of balance sought? For you’ve a spark of goodness that you cannot keep concealed And I’m the blot on linen that can never be erased.
*benoit blanc voice* now that is just amazing, mister kira, but you seem to be a lot less bright then i musta thought... we're only broadcasting this program to the kanto region of japan.
slapstick shenanigans as Light fails to spell Benwah correctly for ten episodes
I genuinely think @staff should give us an official Bot Kill Count where it ticks up every time a bot you reported is officially taken off by the tumblr team and when you hit a certain number you get gruesome little trophies. Gamification can be of the devil but in this particular case I need a little treat for doing my daily chore of taking out the trash
and of course, certainly not a porn bot tumblr description generator for the redemption team. to be fair.
og team
If you're reading this...
go write three sentences on your current writing project.
Eliot on Hardison’s brew pub purchase for ronandhermy.
i want to be clear–this rant right here? is exactly why hardison bought a brew pub
because this, this is a familiar rant. hardison has heard it every time they are even so much as within 5 miles of a brew pub (and, ps, none of those brew pubs ever succeeded in designing a decent menu, per eliot)
when he first sees the listing in portland he cringes and clicks away fast because this is one of the rants it’s not even funny to goad eliot into because it happens SO MUCH and eliot doesn’t even get amusingly wound up, just earnestly offended/annoyed, and this is just the first tenth of the rant, okay? the rest of it involves complicated dissections of where brew pubs in general fail at menu design, and then move on to particular brew pubs who have offended eliot’s soul with the travesty of their menus
no way does hardison want to sign up for a daily dose of that rant, directed at his skills. except then he admits that it would take eliot about 2 minutes to take over the menu design, and this is the guy who can identify the sound of 28 different tire treads over 31 different types of surfaces, okay, he likes a challenge, and really it’s a gift to provide eliot with this opportunity
parker doesn’t look convinced when hardison tries out that explanation. “you sound sarcastic, he’s going to think you’re messing with him, not giving him something.”
and, okay, even in hardison’s head it comes off as sarcastic, as do the fifteen other ways he tries to practice giving eliot the brew pub. the problem is, hardison and eliot are only good at emotions with each other when shit is super tense and potentially-death-filled
hardison clicks away from the page again because it seems kind of hopeless, figuring it out, but then he thinks about eliot having an industrial kitchen to cook for them in, and a staff to order around, and a menu design he’s just secretly dorky enough about to brag about on brew pub posting boards and, well
maybe eliot will knowit’s for him from the get go, maybe he’ll figure it out along the way, or maybe it’ll never click for him, whatever. hardison isn’t concerned about the credit he just wants eliot to have it
he clicks back and contacts the realtor
Eliot re-designs the kitchen with a reinforced section of wall, in front of which, nothing is to be left, because that’s where he throws bad guys, and is tired of replacing the door on the walk-in freezer.
“for one thing, keeping everything the right temperature while the door is off the hinges is a huge pain in the ass, and risks compromising the texture of the… hey, where do you think you’re going?”
“to look up local steel suppliers.”
“none of that crappy, low-carbon chinese stuff. i want american or brazilian.”
At first the staff are certain it’s a money laundering operation. No drugs or guns are obvious so that lets out some elements of organized crime, but no other restaurant pays $15 per hour base or has this much high tech security. It’s sketchy, but a lot of the restaurant business is and they’ll take the money while it lasts.
Then a waitress’s in laws refuse to return her kids after a visit to the grandparents. Two hours after Nate hears about it it’s solved.
ICE tries to grab one of the dishwashers in the parking lot and Elliot goes full ninja on them. They get a postcard from “Carlo” later. He’s been reunited with his family and they’re all “Italian” now. Hardison says people, especially white people, see what they’re expecting to see.
Nate’s girlfriend can’t seem to pick an accent or a name, but she’s cool. Parker will pay for it if anyone wants to go sky diving or base jumping with her.
Overall the staff thinks the restaurant is a good place to work, and they have surprisingly good food for whatever Scooby Doo meets Batman cover story made the owners open the place.
Sending my most reliable corporate staffer to Connecticut to shut down a Christmas tree farm. Wish me luck
By Talos, this can't be happening
the “bad guys” in hallmark movies end up always being the most respectful men ever.
because they will find out their girlfriend of 3 years (that they were about to propose to) went off to a random farm in minnesota, hours away from were the two of them built a life together, and she decided to just… stay there without even consulting him.
and then he decides to take a trip to make sure she’s okay, because this is generally alarming behavior, and then sees that she literally fell in love with her ex within one (1) week- and he wasn’t there, but you can TELL that they’ve made out a couple times.
and then she just strings him along for a few days, until fucking christmas eve, when she just breaks up with him and is like “i know we used to have the same values, but i’ve never loved you. mark makes me happier than you ever did. and you ONLY care about work, whereas i like christmas and fun, like a Good Person.”
and then, after finding out his entire relationship was a lie and he had his life turned upside down in a week and he got dumped on christmas, this guy’s just like “ok yeah that makes sense. i only wish you the best of happiness with mark. i hope you guys build a great life together in christmastreefarmville. thank you for everything.”
An AU where two Hallmark Christmas Bad Guys are both getting flights back to New York after being dumped by their respective Smalltown Blonde Girlfriends, and they bond over their shared experiences and fall in love in the departures lounge
@teashoesandhair your wish is my command :)
Probably, Levi should be more upset.
Probably he is still in shock. Right? He looks out of his taxi window (it's not technically a taxi, just some guy named Corey who offered him a ride to the airport, because Uber doesn't operate in fucking Tinyville, Bumfuck Middle-Of-Nowhere, Utah) and tracks water droplets racing each other down the glass, because of course it's raining, and his bad knee is killing him.
Levi sniffs and rubs at his eyes and then pulls out his phone and books a ticket back to New York, wincing as four hundred and twenty-six dollars are deducted from his bank account.
And, like, he should definitely be more upset.
He just got broken up with. He was engaged, for God's sake. A four-year relationship… over. Just like that.
Corey says, "Ten minutes to the station."
okay so having numbers in your last name is cool when it’s matteo JWHJ0715, but not when it’s a hot girl with a new account on tumblr dot com 🙄 just say you hate women
So my problem with most ‘get to know your character’ questioneers is that they’re full of questions that just aren’t that important (what color eyes do they have) too hard to answer right away (what is their greatest fear) or are just impossible to answer (what is their favorite movie.) Like no one has one single favorite movie. And even if they do the answer changes.
If I’m doing this exercise, I want 7-10 questions to get the character feeling real in my head. So I thought I’d share the ones that get me (and my students) good results:
What is the character’s go-to drink order? (this one gets into how do they like to be publicly perceived, because there is always some level of theatricality to ordering drinks at a bar/resturant)
What is their grooming routine? (how do they treat themselves in private)
What was their most expensive purchase/where does their disposable income go? (Gets you thinking about socio-economic class, values, and how they spend their leisure time)
Do they have any scars or tattoos? (good way to get into literal backstory)
What was the last time they cried, and under what circumstances? (Good way to get some *emotional* backstory in.)
Are they an oldest, middle, youngest or only child? (This one might be a me thing, because I LOVE writing/reading about family dynamics, but knowing what kinds of things were ‘normal’ for them growing up is important.)
Describe the shoes they’re wearing. (This is a big catch all, gets into money, taste, practicality, level of wear, level of repair, literally what kind of shoes they require to live their life.)
Describe the place where they sleep. (ie what does their safe space look like. How much (or how little) care / decoration / personal touch goes into it.)
What is their favorite holiday? (How do they relate to their culture/outside world. Also fun is least favorite holiday.)
What objects do they always carry around with them? (What do they need for their normal, day-to-day routine? What does ‘normal’ even look like for them.)