so you think you can love me and leave me to die? @redjayson - Tumblr Blog

The thing about Miss Piggy is that she kind of has a Roger Rabbit comedy superpower where she wins nearly any conceivable fight she's in. But unlike other characters of which that's true, like say, Bugs Bunny, who tend to win because they make the opponent play the game with their rules, Miss Piggy wins because the joke is that she can beat the shit out of literally anybody.

edgebug

so grace is probably alarming to most eridians at first because he's a lanky wet alien with too few limbs, yes--but what if he ends up being terrifying in a sort of divine way instead of a repulsive one?

like. a creature that perceives the intangible? a creature that walks with thin permeable membranes bared to the air, whose blood contains elixir that can destroy pathogens without heat? a creature that is impossibly fragile yet resilient? a creature that breathes potently flammable gas to survive? a creature that is loud all over and speaks in a strange and frightening monotone, who thought it would die for you? who gave up its home in the heavens for you without meeting you first, whose first words to your people were probably something along the lines of We saved your star. It's gonna be okay. Don't be afraid.

chekhovs-raygun

grace is such an interesting bundle of contradictions! he breathes an incredibly flammable gas because he lives at such a cold temperature the gas can't ignite except he burns it very slowly inside the delicate gauzy cage of his body. his meat is basically a delicate water-and-protein foam because he lives in a very tiny fraction of normal atmospheric pressure. his planet has almost no air, no atmosphere. they're so gauzy, so frail, living underneath a whisker-fine sky, that to get to space in a couple seconds by exploding towards it. they can't build a space elevator because all their materials are just various attempts to do anything whatsoever with shitty frozen metals and various hydrocarbon meshes. their spaceship is a tiny refrigerator, the most expensive thing they ever built, and controled by a impossibly complex calculation engine they knitted out of silicates. it contains all human knowledge, if it doesn't catch on fire.

they knew that space was there because they can perceive it directly. it's literally right overhead all the time for their entire evolution. they know the faces of thousands, millions of stars, as soon as they tip their faces up. eridani is a name from two thousand years ago. all their stars have been named and known and watched and sung about for longer than any individual human civilization. they have always known the eridian star was there.

they live to be seventy.

#project hail mary

jan-liliten

op turned off reblogs but also i respect that they turned them off for a reason but i still want the post here so i removed their name

punkrock-bottom

If you stay up late to hang out with friends I don’t think you should have to be tired in the morning. I think it should be a freebie

quasi-normalcy

I love how Tumblr has a rogues gallery. We've got the White Pharaoh, Spiders Georg, Cousin Throckmorton; who else?

quasi-normalcy

Strong as Fuck Ice Mummy

sistersorrow

So much time has passed that we have forgotten that one guy and his three weed-smoking girlfriends

thecrystallinecryptid

I’m so sorry, I’ve been here for years but I only know two of the people listed here. Someone fill me in on who the ice mummy is?

quasi-normalcy

He's stong as fuck and he has ice powers. He shows up on Mondays sometimes

doveywovy

okay i have a long and complicated heterosexual steve/bucky au but what matters is that the super serum functions essentially like testosterone & steroids. and thus a cis female steve still passes for a man and ends up doing a whole mulan thing with captain america. which she has complicated feelings about but lets not get into that bc the point of this post is her accidentally stolen-valoring like half the identities within the lgbtqia+ community

sam thinks shes a trans woman who's transitioning in the modern era. super reasonable assumption based on what he knows ("captain america" is a man in all the history textbooks, but stevie actively makes an effort to get gendered right off the clock). he fumbles on pronouns like twice while figuring it out and then becomes Steve's Biggest Ally TM and never finds out he is aiding a cis woman with her gender dysphoria and not a trans woman. cool bro move regardless thanks man she needed that

natasha thinks steve is nonbinary and the gender role switching comes from that, because natasha has an insane relationship with her own body+gender and its connection to work. like her role as the femme fatale means she views being a woman as part of her job obligation/title; she views steve's gender situation as similar. she thinks steve is for real actually a man on the job and for real actually a woman off it and this makes so much sense to her.

tony thinks steve & bucky are gay men and refuses to delve into this because he is very worried steve fucked howard and he does not want the details. he makes a lot of mildly homophobic quips that he views as a status of him being progressively accepting (think the "no son of mine wears a skirt........that doesn't match his top!" jokes people made in the 2010s) which steve either totally misses or just views as sexist jokes that she ignores.

thor thinks steve & bucky are lesbians and is very happy for them. he's way more used to the muscular body-builder look on woman so he can easily tell that steve's a gal, but during his early days on earth when he had long hair a lot of people informed him that 'long hair is a girl thing' (it was 2009 after all). so thor assumes any human he sees with long hair is a woman, ergo bucky must be a woman. what a beautiful lesbian partnership. he hopes he gets an invite to the wedding

doveywovy

5) bruce thinks steve is a trans man because all of his deep delving into the serum means he understands that it essentially functioned as ultra-transitioning but he doesn't really get how fucking crazy steve was about Having to Fight in the War and thus he assumes this was gender affirming care for steve as much as it was anything else. hes misgendering steve so hard but he thinks hes being really supportive in doing so, and steve is both very used to scientists specifically disregarding her perspective and also coworkers in general getting it wrong, so she just. ignores it. in 10 years when bruce figures it out hes going to feel like the worst person alive. Bruce also assumes steve is bi because he buys into the peggy carter cover backstory for Captain America & is aware that steve is currently married to bucky.

6) clint has no idea what gender steve is and is too afraid to ask at this point. but hes pretty sure they (?) are asexual because they (?) haven't seemed to be attracted to anyone in all the time they've worked together, even when natasha does her classic "lets make out for a cover identity' thing and- oh they(?) have a husband(?). a partner of indeterminate gender also? clint gives up. thats captain america. he's just going to use the captain title in every sentence instead of pronouns.

#hahaha excellent #captain america #marvel

starkwoes

There's this video of nuns talking about their favourite things to do outside of nun activities and one of them says "ultimate frisbee" and the other one goes "and sister you are so good at that." I literally cannot get "and sister you are so good at that" out of my head. Out of all my stims this one is my fav lolol

thingsfromthedirt

warming carafe with a stained glass pattern (ca. late 50s-early 60s)

madhatter1496

#fandom

babyonwire

Love when something is about a small fucked up weird supernatural town. Shoutout small fucked up weird supernatural towns

redstonedust

what happened to "cool as fuck grandma" as a character trope. i miss "cool as fuck grandma"

tiramasucat

some svss doodles

#svsss

thirdwheelravi

forgot until just now that when i went to the grocery store today i turned down the oil/vinegar aisle and there was a store employee stocking the shelf and he said "welcome to the land of wonders" to me for some reason

background-character-341

For all its faults Tumblr has truly ruined all other social media for me because my friends all have Instagram and are all trying to get me on Instagram more but every time I open Instagram there are like fifteen things screaming for my attention and when I get over myself long enough to start scrolling it's like. Where is my chronological dash. Where is the following-only option. Who are these people. Why are there so many videos. Everyone is screaming at me. And then before I know it I'm thirty minutes into scrolling and I haven't seen a single thing that I actually care about. At least on Tumblr when I see stuff I don't care about I know someone I follow has found a new interest.

datsderbunnyblog

This comment was left on a post about making the most of the Libby app. "Excessive use of generous lending policies" is the most absurd phrase I've ever seen anyone use to discuss libraries.

shutyourmoustache

When my mother forgets a word, she is the queen of coming up with new words. Words that would take a third National Treasure movie to fully decipher. I was talking to her yesterday, and she said this: “You know the time for los jibbities is coming up. You must be so excited!” Oh, is it time for los jibbities already? I must have missed it on my calendar. Are we celebrating something? “Of course! We should all be celebrating, shouldn’t we?” OK, so los jibbities is a happy thing. It’s not like something is giving you the heebie-jeebies, which would have been my one and only guess. “Los heebie-jeebies? Now you’re making things up...and this is my show.” You’re right. The time for los jibbities is coming up. Is this a season? “Yes, the season for love. The season for pride.” OK, los jibbities. “Yeah, sound it out.” Los…jibbities. LGBTs! “Sí, mira cuz you’re gay!” “You couldn’t just say pride season? You couldn’t just… *laughs*