synopsis: dan heng couldn't help but fall in love again
warning: just pure fluff :3
notes: the people (me) yearn for The Ultimate Yearnersâą (dan heng and phainon) to have their happy ending (with stelle/caelus; title is from "I Thought I Saw Your Face Today" by She & Him!!
Dan Heng lets out a huff as he hears footsteps growing louder outside his door. He smiles, bookmarking his book before setting it down, and stands to open the door. Just as his hand is about to turn the doorknob, the door is flung open, nearly knocking him backwards if he hadnât already anticipated it. He lets out a grunt as a force actually knocks him back. Thankfully, he manages to stumble his way backwards towards his bed to soften their fall.
âDan Hengggg, I missed you!â the force whines in his ear. A mop of grey hair fills his view. Dan Heng chuckles quietly, a hand reaching to pat the head.
At the feeling of his warm hand on her head, Stelle looks up at him, golden eyes shining bright as she smiles. Dan Heng feels his heart flutter at the beaming girl in his arms. Just as he opens his mouth to respond, another set of footsteps distracts him. He looks up and is greeted by clear blue eyes. Phainon at least has the courtesy not to barge in and knock him over.
âStelle, didnât you have fun with me today?â Phainon feigns offense, a pout on his lips that Dan Heng wishes to kiss away, fake or not.
Stelle twists around in Dan Hengâs hold to face him. She rolls her eyes playfully. Phainon laughs and makes his way towards the bed. With Stelle in his lap, Dan Heng finds it difficult to make space for Phainon. However, the taller man doesnât seem to mind as he stops in front of the sitting couple, long legs trapping both of their knees in between his own.
âI did, but you canât tell me you also didnât miss Dannie. Who was the one sighing wistfully every time we saw a dragon plush?â Stelle shoots back.
Dan Heng feels his face warm at the thought. He smiles quietly to himself, head tucked down into Stelleâs. Phainon and Stelle have always loved going out, while he preferred staying at home. Despite their differing preferences, they never let Dan Heng feel left out or lonelyâthey always thought of him, one way or another. The abundance of texts and photos he receives throughout their adventures is proof enough.
Without a warning, Phainon flops himself on top of Stelle and Dan Heng, pinning both of them to Dan Hengâs plush bed. Stelle lets out a squeal and Dan Heng a huff, as the air is knocked out of his lungs, though he doesnât mind the weight. He finds it rather comforting.
If Dan Heng has to describe his lovers, Phainon would be like a giant dog who doesnât realize heâs no longer a puppy. Heâs always hanging off either him or Stelle, despite his hulking physique. Stelle, on the other hand, is like a tiny dog who thinks herself much larger and scarier than she really is. Despite being shorter than both of her lovers, she is never one to back away from a fight in her loversâ names.
Dan Heng is brought out of his thoughts by a jostle as Phainon snakes his arms around his waist, pushing Stelle further into him. Dan Heng feels his heart rate pick up as Phainonâs large hands span across his back and Stelleâs soft body pushes up against him. He feels butterflies fluttering violently in his stomach as Phainon effortlessly flips them all over onto his back, freeing Dan Heng from their weight. Stelle lets out a giggle as she smushes her face into Phainonâs plush chest. Phainonâs hands wander mindlessly up and down Dan Hengâs spine. Dan Heng hopes Stelle canât feel just how fast and hard his heart is beating against her back, as he tries to maintain his cool and calm demeanor.
âWhatâre you thinking about, Dannie?â Phainon asks softly, his hands rubbing his back comfortingly.
Dan Heng lets out a thoughtful hum as he buries his head into Stelleâs hair. She always smells of something sweet, like honey, and comforting. He smiles to himself as he breathes in her scentâone of his favorites, his other favorite being Phainonâs, of course. While Stelle smells like a cozy bakery, Phainon smells of a field under the sun, cooled by a fresh summer breeze.
âNot much, just how I missed you guys today,â Dan Heng mumbles into the back of Stelleâs head.
âWe werenât gone for that long,â Phainon laughs lightly. âBut youâre also not the only one missing someone.â
âOh, oh! Wait, Phainon, we almost forgot!â Stelle begins wiggling in between the two of them, trying to free herself.
Dan Heng reluctantly peels himself off of Stelleâs back, gently moving Phainonâs arms away. He scoots backwards, giving the girl some space to hop off. Phainon whines at the loss of warmth, but still watches Stelle run off with a smile on his face. He creeps a hand over to Dan Hengâs, thick, warm fingers carefully intertwining with Dan Hengâs cooler and more slender ones. Dan Heng turns to the taller man, who is now sitting up, shoulders tented up a bit as he leans his weight on the hand that isnât intertwined with Dan Hengâs.
Phainon smirks at Dan Hengâs inquisitively raised eyebrow, curious about what Stelle leapt out of their embrace for. At the feeling of Phainonâs thumb gently rubbing his wrist, Dan Heng feels his face flush for the nth time since his lovers had arrived back home. Paired with Phainonâs deadly smirk, Dan Heng canât help but fluster under his gaze. He watches as Phainonâs usually bright eyes darken, the clear blue being overtaken by his pupils dilating. He feels himself being pulled closer to Phainon. The other man leaned in as well until Dan Heng could feel his breath tickle his own face. Heâs jolted out of their staring competition by a sudden cough. Dan Heng flushes from his neck up, head snapping towards the sound. Stelle watches them with a smirk of her own, hands hiding something behind her back.
âHey, no funny business without me,â she teases, causing Phainon to laugh and Dan Heng to look away bashfully at being caught.
She bounds happily over, shoving Dan Heng into Phainonâs side to make space for herself on the bed. A slightly crumpled paper bag sits in her lap. Dan Heng leans in, curiously, but Stelle has her hands sealing the bag closed tightly. She wags a finger at him.
âNuh-uh, close your eyes and hold your hands out!â Stelle boops his nose.
Dan Heng smiles and shakes his head before complying, ignoring the fact that both Phainon and Stelle are giggling suspiciously. âIt better not be something groââ
Heâs cut off by two loud kisses on his cheek, causing him to jump, nearly fumbling whatever Stelle had dropped into his open palms. Dan Heng sputters, opening his eyes and blinking rapidly to readjust his vision. He looks down to see a small box sitting innocently in his hands. Phainon scoots closer, resting his chin on Dan Hengâs shoulder as Stelle leans into his side and rests her head on his other shoulder.
âOpen it!â Stelle urges, getting comfortable against him.
With a slight tremble in his hand, Dan Heng carefully opens the box. On a layer of soft cotton sits a shiny, silver bracelet with three charms. He lifts it out of the box and holds it up to admire it. The corners of his mouth twitch up when he notices what the ceramic charms areâthe face of a Samoyed, a raccoon, and a dragon.
Stelle plucks the now empty box out of his palm and sets it aside before wrapping her arms around his waist, chin now resting on his shoulder. Phainon takes the bracelet from him and unclasps it, waiting expectantly for Dan Heng to extend an arm so he can put it on for him.
âItâs so you can have us with you even when weâre away,â Phainon smiles softly as he clasps the bracelet securely onto Dan Hengâs wrist.
Dan Heng feels a flustering heat build up within him as Phainon gently cradles his extended hand in his large, warm ones. Stelleâs own wandering hands donât help satiate the warmthâthey fuel it instead. Dan Heng clenches his free hand, praying to whichever Aeon is listening that his heart doesnât beat any faster than it already is. With one hand pressed up against his stomach, Stelle holds out her other arm to show Dan Heng her own matching bracelet.
She kisses his cheek, âSee, me and Phainon both have one too! That way weâll also have you with us even if you arenât with us physically.â
Dan Hengâs eyes dart to the bracelet, and the shine on Phainonâs wrist doesnât go unnoticed either. Suddenly overwhelmed with adoration for his lovers, Dan Hengâs head drops down, his dark hair swaying at the movement. He feels his face and ears burn as Stelle leaves another kiss at the nape of his neck. Phainonâs cheeky laugh tickles Dan Hengâs ears, worming its way to his butterfly-filled stomach.
Dan Heng takes a shaky breath and looks up. He knows his face is still beet red by the giant grins Phainon and Stelle both sport. He cups both of their faces closer with each hand. Dan Heng leans into Phainon and gives him a kiss, mumbling a meek âthank youâ before turning to Stelle and giving her a matching one.
Phainon nuzzles his nose into Dan Hengâs cheek. He can feel the white haired manâs widening smile against his face. Stelle has moved from his nape to the spot where his jaw and neck connect. Dan Heng swallows hard when she leaves a soft kiss there. Her hand pets at his stomach, causing his insides to somersault. The sensation only gets more violent when Phainon rests a hand on his thigh to balance himself. Dan Heng finds himself enjoying the twisting and flipping feeling happening within him.
Dan Heng closes his eyes, his lashes fluttering against his cheek, savoring the moment. Face still red, surrounded and held by his two favorite people, the smile on his face refuses to leave. He fell in love with them once, a long time ago, but he finds himself falling all over againâjust the way he likes.
not my usual self insert, but hope you guys enjoy it regardless <3
synopsis: despite the hot new tattoo artist working right across from her, yachi canât bring herself to do more than daydream about her. when y/n comes in wanting to learn more about floristry for a job, will yachi be able to bond and get with the girl of her dreams or will she keep hiding in the sidelines to protect her delicate feelings?
the vibes: tattoo shop and flower shop AU, opposites attract, black cat x golden retriever, sapphic romance and sapphic angst, new beginnings
progress: completed
warning: contains internalized homophobia, profanity, potentially more mature topics, some mental health talk, drinking, potential ooc-ness, canon divergence!!
notes: please ignore the timestamps and amount of likes/retweets/comments!! i was too lazy to put in random numbers on all of them; all characters are in their 20s, light mode is yachiâs pov and dark mode is y/nâs!!
written parts are indicated by âź
profiles
crow inks || daisy chains
chapters
bouquet 1: Purple Gloxinia (love at first sight)
bouquet 2: Acacia Blossom (secret/concealed love) âź
bouquet 3: Yellow Tulips (happiness and hope)
bouquet 4: Yellow Freesias (friendship, support, & optimism)
bouquet 5: Calaminthas (shyness)
bouquet 6: Purple Petunias (mystery and enchantment) âź
bouquet 7: Pink Orchids (happiness and playfulness)
bouquet 8: Striped Carnations (denial and rejection)
bouquet 9: Solidasters (support and good fortune)
‷bouquet 9.5: Sunflowers (joy)
bouquet 10: Colorful Dahliahs (devotion) âź
bouquet 11: Tarragons (lasting interest)
bouquet 12: Bleeding Hearts (heartbreak)
bouquet 13: Lotuses (relief and rebirth)
bouquet 14: Daisies (first love)
bouquet 15: Black Dahlias (betrayal)
bouquet 16: Purple Hyacinth (sorrow, regret, & forgiveness)
bouquet 17: White Carnations (embarking on a new journey) âź
epilogue
extra bouquet: Yellow Lilies (joy, happiness, & new beginnings)
flower dividers by @strangergraphics-archive
heart dividers by @jilval
synopsis: caleb believed the concept of safety and security was a myth until he met a little girl with bright eyes and a sweet smile who shared her apple slices with him
warning: half canon-compliant half made up shit, mild blood and gore (children being experimented on by EVER and reader's chest being cut open while conscious), children being experimented on but not much is explicitly described, non-sexual partial nudity of children (caleb and reader), a little bit of suicidal ideation, lots of angst
notes: this is sort of a mix between the current timeline and fallen cosmos au! this was tons of fun writing and i hope you enjoy :D
Caleb still remembers the day Josephine greeted him at the shelter. She strolled in, a wide, motherly smile on her face, but Caleb knew better. He had subtly shifted himself so that he was standing in front of the sleeping girl, hiding her from Josephineâs view. Josephine looked over, and her smile widened by a fraction at the sight of him.
She approached slowly, her palms up, as if reaching out to a wild animal ready to strike. Caleb felt just like one. Heâd never forget how cold and cruel Josephineâs gaze was as she poked and prodded at him without an ounce of sympathy. Although the older woman was far sweeter to the little girl by his side, he would never forgive Josephine for the atrocities she had committed against her.
He was never allowed out of his room aside from when they experimented on him or for meals, but he always found a way to escape. He needed to be there for her, even if a glass pane was in the way. He always watched with wide eyes and angry tears as they cut and yanked the girl apart until her heart stopped beating. Her screams hauntedâstill haunt him to this day.
Caleb shivered. Despite only being 10, he feels the weight of the world constantly crashing down on him. If it werenât for the little girl napping behind him, his best friend, he doesnât know if heâd even still be alive. Before they had met, Caleb had succumbed to his fate of endless torture he endured every day. He had lost his will and drive despite not even reaching double digits in age. Every night, Caleb silently prayed that he wouldnât wake up the next day.
He had been aimlessly trudging back to his room after lunch when a weight bumped into him, almost toppling him over. Caleb huffed, looking down to see what he had collided with. To his surprise, it was another kid, a couple of years younger than him, it seemed. He had grown used to seeing other children around, but never being in close proximity to any of them. They had set him apart, locked him away in his own special room, away from everyone else. He was something special, powerful, and useful, they had told him.
The little girl had grasped onto the rags they gave him as clothes to avoid her fall. He tried to pry her tiny fingers off but paused when she stared up at him with bright eyes. Caleb blinked, and the girl blinked back. He tilted his head curiously, and her head shifted as well, mimicking his. Caleb opened his mouth to say something, but the girl was dragged off by one of the staff members before he could get a sound out.
He stared as they hauled her down the hall. Though she did not actively put up a fight, Caleb could see the spark of ferocity in her eyes. When he returned to his room, he stood in front of the mirror. Dull, purple eyes stared back at him. His mind wandered to the girl. He had never seen as bright and dazzling as her eyes before.
The second time they met was during lunch a few days later. He had been poking at the plain, tasteless ânutritionalâ mush that was provided for every meal with his spoon. The sound of a tray clanking on the table caused him to look up. Across from him was the same little girl, the one with the bright eyes, whom he had crashed into the other day, clambering onto the seat too big for her. When she settled in her seat, she gave him a wide smile. Caleb raised a brow and studied her. They told him to always submit without question, but with the rare smile around this place, he couldnât help the questions that swam in his mind.
âWho are you?â he asked, curiosity getting the better of him.
The girl raised her right arm and wordlessly pointed at the band on her wrist. It read A-01. She looked at him expectantly. He copied her movement and pointed at his own wristband, X-02. He didnât know if she could read yet, but she seemed to understand.
His gaze drifted down to her tray. Alongside the lump mandated nutritional mush everyone was served for lunch, two slices of apples sat bright and red next to it. Calebâs eyes widened. Nobody ever got anything other than the mandated meal. The girl must have noticed Calebâs stare because when he looked back at her, she held up one of the slices towards him.
Caleb felt something in him flutter, but not in the usual way his anxiety made him flustered. It was something lighterâwarmer. For a split second, Caleb wondered how this simple act of kindness could make him feel so safe for once in his short, insignificant life. He cautiously plucked it out of her waiting hand and was rewarded with another smile of hers. This time, he couldnât help but return a shy one of his own.
He saw her every day at meal time after that. He had come to the conclusion that she must be special, like him, which allowed them to interact. Though the little girl never spoke, sheâd find ways to non-verbally respond to his many questions. Even though Caleb was the only one speaking, the two grew close in a short amount of time. He had even begun affectionately dubbing her as âpipsqueakâ.
âItâs because youâre so tiny,â Caleb laughed.
She pouted and rolled her eyes. Youâre older than me, of course, youâre bigger than me.
Caleb wrapped her in a tight hug despite the awkward positioning of them being on opposite ends of the table. She nuzzled her head into his chin. Although that was part of the reason, he didnât want to drag the mood down with his true thoughts. Caleb hated how demeaning it was to be referred to as letters and numbers, as a specimen, less than, and unworthy of a name. He refused to call her by the label EVER had tagged her with, he wouldnât stoop to their level and refer to his friendâhe smiled at the thought, his first friendâas such.
Caleb never saw her outside of meal time, but whenever he was called in to be experimented on, his mind would drift back to her bright eyes and the apple slices she so kindly shared with him. It anchored him, almost letting him forget the pain he endured. Caleb began looking forward to waking up the next day again.
Caleb was shaken out of his newfound reverie the day she had died for the very first time. He was being escorted by a staff member to the torture chamber, as he had deemed it, when he spotted the girl being escorted back from it. He knew every kid at this wretched place underwent some form of experimentation. No kid went about without at least a new scar every day.
He clenched his fist, digging his nails into the meat of his palm. The girl had her head down, silently shuffling next to her chaperone. Caleb figured since they never intervened when they interacted at lunch, they wouldnât mind him doing so now. He strayed a few steps ahead of his own chaperone to comfort the girl. It was never easy coming out of that despicable room. He wanted to wrap her up in his arms and make her feel safe like how he feels whenever heâs in her presence. However, to his horror, when she looked up at him, that spark he had grown to love and admire had vanished from her eyes.
She stared up at him blankly, as if she didnât recognize him at all. The girlâs chaperone glared down at him, but he refused to take his eyes off the girl. Something was wrong, very wrong. They had been getting along for the past couple of weeks now, he knew she could pick him out from the crowd as he could her. However, her current gaze said otherwise.
Caleb lunged for the adult next to her, nails clawing at skin. He hadnât been able to cause much harm before he was being tugged away, roaring. He spared a glance at the girl who watched everything happen with an eerie, dead stare.
âWhat did you do to her?!â Caleb demanded, struggling against the hold on him.
âNone of your business, brat,â the woman he had attacked spat.
Caleb fumed. A hand had been placed almost gently on his shoulder, and Caleb looked up. He shivered at the icy glare of his own chaperone. He couldnât move a muscle as their stare pinned him to the floor.
âHe should know, shouldnât he?â Caleb shrank a little at the condescending tone, âThey areâŠfriends, after all.â
The woman chuffed, âRight. Friends. Well, if you really want to know, she finally hit her breaking point and died. She doesnât even remember anything, which works in our favor. Just as planned.â
Calebâs head reared up in shock, âDied? As planned?â
His chaperone shoved his head down, âIâll indulge you this time, but you should stop asking questions if you know whatâs good for you. This little girl has something spectacular in her. It shouldnât be possible to revive her so easily after a death like that, but here she is, seemingly even stronger than before. More experiments will have to be done to be sure, but weâve only just begun anyway.â
As if they could predict his next moves, Caleb felt a pinch in his arm, and though he tried to resist, the anesthetic set in quickly. As his eyes closed, his gaze stayed steady on the girlâs retreating form. I have to keep her safe, he thought to himself as he fell into a dreamless sleep.
It was an endless, heart-wrenching cycle. It continued week after week, which led to months, and eventually, Caleb stopped keeping track. Every time he reintroduced himself to her, sheâd forget him the very next day. His hatred for EVER grew with each memory wipe, but he always put on a brave smile for her.
He heard the murmurs about how her evol kept getting stronger with each death. Caleb wasnât sure what her powers entailed, but he couldnât care less when her mind drifted further and further away, leaving her a pliant doll for them to play with. He seethed at their disregard for her well-being.
Caleb began plotting. He had snuck out of his room successfully plenty of times before, but he was fueled with purpose this time. He didnât care what sort of punishment he would receive if caught; He had to see for himself what they were doing to her. What wicked methods had they been using to torture herâto take her away from him?
He snuck into the experimentation room with ease, which unsettled him. It felt too easy. He had practically waltzed right in. He pushed his wariness to the side and made his way to the giant window that separated him from her.
Nausea hit him immediately, and Caleb felt his knees growing weak at the morbid sight in front of him. He leaned against the window to support his weight as he watched them. Caleb stared, frozen in horror, as they swapped to a new set of equipment. The girl lay strapped onto the table, tears streaming down her dull cheeks, eyes nearly rolled all the way back. He knew the feeling all too well. He hoped she had fallen unconscious, never wishing that sheâd experience the point where all the began blending together.
As if the girl didnât already have her chest carved open, her heart beating weakly in the open air, the woman who seemed to be the lead surgeonâif he could even call her thatâpicked up the scalpel from her set of tools. He wanted to pound at the window and scream at them. Hadnât they cut her open enough, stolen enough of her blood? He knew that the only reason she wasnât making any noise was because she had already screamed herself hoarse.
Caleb wished he could barge in and stop them, but he knew it would only throw a wrench in his plans. Theyâd simply knock him out and throw him back into his room, and give him an even more difficult time the next time he was on that table. With his evol locked away by his wristband, there was nothing much he could do. He was only a child.
Calebâs angry gaze flew across the room, taking each face into memory so he knew which ones he wouldnât spare if he were given the chance. He froze when his eyes connected with the leader of the operation. Caleb shivered under her piercing stare. She looked at him as if he were nothing more than a bug underneath her shoe, perhaps even less than. She held his gaze for only a moment before focusing back onto her task.
âLet us begin,â her voice rang out clear with authority.Â
Without wasting another second, she began cutting into the girlâs flesh with practiced ease. As soon as the blade touched her skin and the girlâs ragged screams hit Calebâs ears, he ran. He couldnât watch or listen anymore. It was all too much. He locked himself away the rest of the day and refused to go out for dinner. He needed to think, to find a way out immediately.
Caleb was surprised he hadnât been called in for a few days, but he couldnât feel any solace from it when he knew they were torturing her instead. He couldnât wait around any longer and stormed out in search of the girl. Luckily, he caught her as she was about to be escorted in. He clawed at the staff members around him, flailing like a wild animal. He managed to free the little girl from their grasp and stood bravely in front of her, separating her from their tormentors.
One of the staff members reached out to yank him away, but he bit down hard on the hand. With a pained shriek, the staff forcefully pried open Calebâs jaw to remove their hand. Caleb snarled, and he felt the girl fist the back of his shirt. Even though she was afraid, he felt glad that she was feeling something, rather than the deadness he had witnessed before.
Caleb nearly cried out of relief when theyâd pulled him into the room instead of her. Itâd mean theyâd given her a break. He had long vowed to take on as much pain and suffering as needed in order to relieve her of hers.
As he lay on the table, nude, save for his underwear, and strapped down, he closed his eyes and tried to calm himself down. Thinking of her sweet smiles and warm hugs always worked. Just as heâd begun to calm, a familiar icy voice calling his name sent his heartbeat skyrocketing with anxiety.
Caleb snapped his eyes open. Though he had only heard that voice once, he could recognize it anywhere. It was her, the one who had cut open his only safe haven in this hell without an ounce of humanity. The one who had eyed him down as if he were nothing but a piece of lint on the ground as he watched them poke and prod at the girlâs dying heart. He was going to be sick.
âGet the fuck away from me!â Caleb thrashed against the bindings on his wrists and ankles.
The woman gave no reaction, which fueled Calebâs rage even more. How dare she commit these inhumane atrocities and act like nothing has happened? She knew he had witnessed everything. It was almost as if she had left the room open for him to walk into that day, as if she had wanted him to witness it all.
Caleb clenched his fists and snarled. The woman merely gave him a brief smile before turning to set up her station. This must be his punishment for finally feeling an ounce of safety in this godforsaken place.
âYouâre incredibly smart for someone your age,â she said as she stuck electrodes onto his forehead, âYou should know there is no escape by now.â
Caleb simply glared at her, and as soon as she had finished setting up, the tests began. Caleb had been injected with more mystery substances than he even knew could exist, and his body and evol were pushed to the limits. Everything hurt; he was exhausted and miserable. It didnât stop for an entire week with little breaks, but he was grateful. He was grateful that he was the one on that table being tormented instead of his kind and caring friend. Caleb refused to cry on that table despite his every nerve being set on fire..
When they finally tossed him back into his room, Caleb wasnât sure if he was even still alive. He waited for them to leave before he would even attempt to push himself off the floor, but they didnât. He heard more footsteps coming his way, and they halted before one of them used their boot to roll him onto his back. In his pain-inflicted haze, he swore he saw an angel descend upon him in the form of his best friend.
âA-01 wanted to see you. Refused to eat and starved herself until we let her,â the man who had rolled him over sneered, âCanât have our best subjects killing themselves without our supervision, unfortunately.â
Caleb let out a weak scoff as his door closed and the escorts left. He felt a small hand gently rest on his shoulder, and he used the last of his strength to sit up and lean against his bed on the floor. Finally, he allowed himself to cry.
He could feel the girl fretting near him but he couldnât stop the sobs. He cried even harder when she wrapped her arms around his weak body and gave a light squeeze. Amongst his own wails, he heard her murmur, causing him to cease his tears.
âDonât cry,â her voice came out as quiet as a whisper, a little croaky from lack of use.
For the first time in months, Caleb no longer had a proper concept of time, he laughedâa real laugh. Seemingly startled by his change of emotions, the girl backed up a little and blinked at him with wide eyes. Caleb settled and gently took her hand in his.
âThatâs the first time youâve said something,â he beamed, the warmth of her hand traveling up his own and spreading into his heart.
The girl looked away shyly and nodded, âSafe. With you.â
Caleb felt the tears well up in his eyes but quickly wiped them away before she could worry anymore. He pulled her back into his embrace, kissing the crown of her head. The two held tight, not wanting to let go just yet.
âYou make me feel safe, too,â Caleb whispered.
Itâs subtle at first, the shaking and rumbling. Having been worn out from the extensive experimenting and testing, Caleb slept heavier than usual. However, the whimpering next to him snapped him awake immediately. He gathered the girl in his arms and held her tight while assessing the situation around him.
The entire sky was red, and the shaking got stronger. There was an ominous, dark pit looming above the building. He immediately knew this was their chance to escape, and if not now, they would be dead from the rubble of the current building anyway. Without a second thought, he helped the girl up and ran with her hand in his.
âPips, hold onto my hand tight, okay?â Caleb spared a glance behind him to check on the girl he was practically dragging with him.
She nodded frantically and squeezed his hand. Caleb wasnât at his full strength, but he pushed on. The building had already started collapsing, and Caleb held onto the girl tightly as he guided them away from the falling debris.
Itâs only when they halted at a crumbled wall did Caleb realize that their wristbands had fallen off. Perhaps during the chaos, with the building actively collapsing, the systems that controlled the wristbands crashed and set them free. Caleb watched as the wall crumbled three floors down onto the road.
He turned to the girl and said with a gentle voice, âWeâre gonna jump, okay? All the doors are blocked, and this is the only way out.â
As predicted, the girl shook her head, backing away from the hole. Tears streamed down her face. As much as it pained Caleb to force her to do something she didnât want to, he knew he had to. It was their only chance.
âWe can use our evols now, see?â Caleb showed her his free wrist, âI can get us down safely, but you have to jump with me. I promise Iâll keep you safe.â
Despite his own pounding heart, he had to make sure hers wasnât. His eyes flew to the loosening debris above their heads. He pulled her a little closer.
âJust hold on tight,â he begged.
The girl trembled and cried, but looked at him with determination and whimpered, âPromise?â
âPromise,â Caleb nodded.
Hand in hand, the two children leapt from the third floor just as the ceiling above them collapsed. The girl screamed in terror, and Caleb immediately put his evol to use. If he hadnât been so drained from the previous week, he probably could have controlled it better, but he was able to soften their fall.
Caleb quickly tugged the girl into his embrace as they shot closer and closer to the ground. He used his body to shield hers as they landed and rolled across the ground. With a pained groan, he sat up, inspecting the girl.
With no visible new injuries, Caleb pulled her back into his arms as she sobbed. He sniffled a little as well as he ran a hand soothingly up and down her back. He cooed at her in hopes of easing her wails.
âYouâre okay now, Pips. Iâve got you,â he hushed, rocking a little.
The girlâs cries eased into sniveling, âCalebâŠsafe.â
âCaleb?â He asked, pointing to himself.
The girl nodded, wiping her own tears away
âCaleb,â she pointed at him and then pointed at herself, âPips.â
Caleb nearly burst into tears then and there. His lips stretched into the widest smile heâs ever smiled. In return, the girl finally smiled back.
âThatâs right, Caleb will keep you safe,â he hugged her, teary-eyed.
Caleb was elated. He finally had a name of his own, dubbed by his very own Pips. With renewed vigor, Caleb stood and dusted himself off, and set off for safety hand in hand with his only friend.
The shelter was safe enough. Truthfully, Caleb wasnât sure if any place would ever be safe enough for his Pips, but for now, the shelter that had mercifully taken them in should do.
Throughout the months there, Caleb had learned many things. The first was that he had the deepspace tunnel that appeared in the sky for their escape. He later found that people had dubbed it the Chronorift Catastrophe. Despite eavesdropping hearing about how many have lost so much from the disaster, he couldnât help but be immensely grateful towards it. Without it, he wasnât sure heâd be standing there at all.
Caleb also learned that though they had escaped EVERâs building, the feeling of safety was fleeting. He was constantly wary of the eyes around him, wondering what two lonely children were doing by themselves with no adult supervision at the shelter. Especially since the girl didnât speakâshe only spoke to him, but even then, she did not speak muchâhe was worried people would view her as disrespectful and harm her. He kept the girl close to him at all times. Only in the dead of night, when even all the adults were asleep, could Caleb feel at ease.
Curled up under the blankets in the same bed as his best friend was the only source of comfort he had. As he listened to her soft breaths as she slept, only then was he able to calm the storm in his mind. Only when she clutched at his shirt, murmuring in her sleep, was he able to stop the constant warnings his brain would throw at him.
Eventually, Caleb learned to live with âsafe enoughâ. He had come to terms with the fact that nothing would be up to his standard of security, but he was content. As long as he had his Pipsqueak, he would be alright. That was until Josephine walked past the shelter doors.
âGet away from us,â Caleb growls, hackles raised.
The girl stirs behind him and slowly stands up and tugs at his shirt, curious as to what is going on. The older woman simply watches with a placating smile on her face. It creeps Caleb out how easily she can make herself seem docile despite her cold and uncaring eyes. Nothing can wipe the memories of her cruelty from his mind.
Caleb keeps the younger girl behind him as the older woman pulls out a couple of papers from her bag to show him. As he reads and processes the words on the papers, he can feel every ounce of hope draining from his body. She officially has custody over them, and Caleb is once again reminded that he is merely a child and there is nothing he can do.
âMy name is Josephine, and youâll both be staying with me from now on,â she smiles at them.
Josephine gently takes one of their hands in each of her own and quietly leads them out of the shelter. Caleb is numb, Josephineâs soft tittering falling deaf on his ears. He even lets her strap him safely into her car without a fight.
Caleb has never wished to learn her name or to see his greatest tormentor show up in front of him. Yet here he is.
Most of the drive is silent, and itâs only when Josephine finally speaks again does Caleb snap out of his thoughts.
âYouâre a smart kid. You should know there is no escape by now,â she smiles at him through the rear-view mirror.Â
Caleb feels sick. There truly is no escape.
The first few nights at their new âhomeâ, Josephine had been just so kind enough to let them share a room. Caleb wonders if sheâd somehow gained some humanity during their time apart. However, the thought is quickly dispelled when Josephine insists that the girl learn to be more independent from Caleb and sleep in her own room.
After spending months sharing a bed with the girl, Caleb finds it difficult to split from her at night. Even just the thought of her being one room apart has him feeling queasy and anxious. He canât protect her properly if heâs not right next to her. He puts on a brave face and departs from her with a goodnight kiss on the head, not wanting to scare her. Heâs just glad the girl doesnât remember Josephine and that she has settled in nicely so far. He falls asleep with great difficulty.
Caleb stirs in his sleep. Heâd always been a light sleeper, if he slept at all, due to the constant state of hypervigilance he was in while at EVER. His eyes remain closed, but his ears tune in on the rustling seemingly coming from downstairs. He slowly opens his eyes and squints at the clock by his bedside. It is 2 in the morning.
The boy tosses the blankets off his body and sits up. Josephine should be asleep or tinkering away with something, he tries not to dwell on what torture devices she could possibly be working on in her own room. Caleb swings his feet off the bed, toes curling slightly at the coolness of the floor. Rubbing his eyes, he makes his way out of his room and towards the room next to his.
He is surprised to see the door wide open already. Caleb peeks in and sure enough, the bed is empty. He panics quietly, worrying over the girl he had come to this new âhomeâ with. Calebâs head whips towards Josephineâs door down the hall. The lights are still on, casting a soft glow through the cracks of the door. He only sees one shadow, which he recognizes as Josephineâs, and lets out a sigh of relief. His Pips isnât in the room with that monster.
Caleb makes his way downstairs as quietly as possible and ventures around in the dark. He spots a familiar head of tangled, bed-mussed hair. He lets out a breath of relief he didnât even know he was holding. He makes his way over while making some noise so as not to startle her. She turns around at the sound of his footsteps and beams.
âWhat are you doing down here, Pips? Canât sleep?â Caleb whispers.
The girl shakes her head, âCalebâŠheard you tossing and turning. Just wanted to get you a cup of water.â
She brings out her hand from behind her back and reveals the empty cup sheâs holding. Caleb simply chuckles affectionately before taking the cup from her and filling it up himself. He drinks a little before offering the girl the cup, which she drinks from thankfully.
âThank you for thinking of me. Letâs go back to bed now, yeah?â Caleb sets the now-empty cup in the sink.
He takes her hand and starts to head towards the stairs, but is met with resistance. He looks back, and the girl is tugging at his hand. He gives her a concerned look, and the girl looks away, seemingly not knowing what to say. Caleb ushers her towards the couch instead.
They sit for a while and eventually lie across the couch, cuddling close. Caleb gently strokes her head as she presses close against him. They remain in comfortable silence for a while.
âCaleb,â the girl whispers, and he pauses his patting.
âYeah?â He mumbles back, wrapping his arms around her instead.
âCaleb, you always keep me safe,â she nuzzles into his chest, âI will keep you safe too.â
At her quiet, sleepy words, Caleb holds her a little bit tighter. He feels her breath slowing down, and he gives her a kiss on the head. He closes his eyes with a content smile. As he dozes off, Caleb thinks to himself that he might just be able to feel safe after all.
thank you for reading this! i haven't really seriously written anything in a while, but hopefully this was still a fun read!
synopsis: it was only supposed to be one summer, but it somehow became five whole years for baxter ward
warning: baxter's dlc spoilers ofc; been a while since i've played the game, so might not be entirely canon-compliant; tried to make reader as ambiguous as possible, lmk if there's anything that says otherwise! also contains mild olnf spoilers (baxter's relationship with the boys club members); lots and lots of yearning
notes: i love love loveee this game sm and since it is fall i had to write for our favorite fall representative!!
It was only supposed to be one summer. One summer away from his stifling parents, a chance to prove he was better than who they raised him to be. When Baxter left that summer, he thought that would be it. He thought he could leave with a simple, warm memory that he could look back fondly on. Despite the bitter ending he had with them, his sunshine of a neighbor, the majority of the summer remained sweet and untainted in his mind.
He was okay for the first few months, or at least he convinced himself he was. When met with a sharp twinge of guilt for the way he had ended things with his sweet neighbor, Baxter shoved the feeling down, locked it up, and threw the key away. College kept him busy enough as it did. He did not need that feeling gnawing away at his conscience as well.
People came and went. He smiled, putting on an outgoing, charming persona, the same one he displayed when he first arrived at Sunset Bird. The same one that slowly washed away when met with earnestness and sincerity. However, he had no use for his own genuineness anymore. Nobody stayed in his life long or got close enoughâhe made sure of it.
Baxter lived through the rest of his college years that way. It was better like this, he tried to convince himself. He was already so used to his act of suavity that he thought it would be easier. He made sure people liked him, but never enough to hold any expectations of him. The only expectations he had of himself would be determined by him and himself only. An occasional thought of itâs lonely would be swiftly brushed under a rug. He could deal with it in exchange for the protection of familiarity.
Holding an act for people was not something new to Baxter. It was tiring, but had become routine for him. He knew his parents would never approve of his feelings for Qiu. Despite being a few years older, he was hopelessly charmed by the ballet dancer. Baxter found himself clinging to the other boy in a way he had never clung before.
His parents never masked their dismay with Baxterâs friend group, nor their friendship, throughout the years, so they certainly would not have changed their minds just because of his feelings. So he acted. Baxter pretended his chest did not squeeze when he was near Qiu. He pretended to be disinterested in what his dear friends had to say. He distanced himself from everyone in Golden Grove. It made his judgmental and bigoted parents marginally happier, allowing him to live another day without confrontation.
Baxter had comforted himself with the thought of the new family that moved into Qiuâs cul-de-sac. The mother and child duo were quite charming, and Baxter had no doubt that they would keep his friends safe from criticism and happy, something he could not do himself. They had fit snugly into the friend group with ease, along with a bright-eyed, red-headed girl, easing Baxterâs worries. With that, he brushed the memories of his time with that party into a quiet corner of his mind.
Graduation came, but his parents did not, as expected. Baxter found that he simply did not careâwhy should he, when they never did? They had only sent him a simple bouquet of sunflowers and a plain card that had âcongratulationsâ written in elegant handwriting. His stomach churned as he held the bouquet in his hands, the wrapper crinkling under his tight grip. Of all the flowers, it just had to be the one that bombarded him with thoughts of that summer. The summer he was greeted with a smile brighter than the sun. The summer he learned the warmth of keeping good company. The summer he chased after in his dreams.
Baxter found himself grimacing. The once sweet memory had turned bitter with each guilty thought he had locked away and suppressed. What started as tiny pinches of remorse eventually snowballed into stabs of shame and regret, all of which he stuffed deeper and deeper into the depths of his mind. As he lay in bed that night, he was suddenly hit with a pang of yearning. Baxter found himself unable to sleep that night, an uncomfortable nausea kept constant in his gut.
Baxter found himself back on the sandy beaches of Sunset Bird. He was quite proud of himself for finding a notable job as an event planner all by himself, without the influence of his familyâs money or name. He was content with this new start as a recent graduate in a new destination. In the back of his mind, however, he wondered just why exactly he decided to settle for a job in the place where he committed his biggest regret.
He made connections here and there, but no longer cared to maintain any friendships. He remained professional and just the right amount of likable to all those he came into contact with. As the seasons changed and months passed, Baxter had hoped his longing for a warm summer would go away, but it never did. It clung to him like a constant itch that he could not reach.
It had nearly been a year since he moved to Sunset Bird. A cold gust chilled him to the bone, despite it being spring. He could never quite shake off the numbing coolness in his heart. Baxter thought back to the time his sunny, temporary neighbor had dragged him out to the beach with their friends. They had somehow coaxed him to at least dip his feet into the gentle waves, their soft hand never letting go of his elbow, anchoring him. He could feel the sun-heated water lapping at his ankles and the sand tickling the soles of his feet. He missed the heat that radiated from the sun and from their hand. He hoped the memory of it would be enough to ward off the biting winds that tormented him.
As desperately as he tried to cling to the sun-kissed memory, he was no match against the brewing storm. The warm waters churned and splashed, turning into a freezing whirlpool that dragged him further and further away from the surface. No matter how hard he fought against the violent currents, he was being yanked relentlessly to the ocean floor, just as he had always feared it would. He could no longer feel the safe, grounding hold they once had on him.
It hit him then. Summer took all the warmth and joy with them, leaving Fall with a chilly breeze and longing for something he could never reach. No matter who or what Baxter pursued, Fall would always be chasing after Summer. The thought settled like a deep, cold, unending pit in his stomach. Baxter clenched his fist, fingernails digging deep into his palms. The pinch was no comparison to the sudden ache in his chest.
The moment their eyes met, his walls dropped. He shook himself out of his dazeâhe was quick to guard himself again. What are you guarding? He asked himself. Memories from summer five years ago flashed through Baxterâs mind. He had nothing he needed to protect himself from. In fact, he would not be surprised if they had their walls up instead. He could tell from just a glance how deeply he had wounded them. He did not deserve them, just like he had first thought when he left them abandoned at his doorstep the night before he departed.
Forced to remain in their proximity to plan Jude and Scottâs wedding reopened many woundsâwounds he had created for both of them. Despite the hurt, he found their presence healing at the same time. As they practically relived their first dalliance, he found himself shivering less and less. Baxter found himself just as he did five years ago, greedily reveling in undeserved warmth and care. His chase was nearing its end. They were so close to his grasp, he was almost there. He knew if he did not end the chase himself, he would run out of steam and fall behind.
The wedding kept him extremely busy. He took much pride in how well it was going. The satisfaction of a job well done was just enough to keep his nerves at bay. Before he knew it, the wedding reception had ended, and he found himself face to face with the very person whom his heart had been orbiting the past five years. The sun was setting, casting a golden glow upon them as they reached out a hand, asking him for a dance. The light haloed around them as he spun them around, feeling lighter than he ever had been in the past half-decade.
Baxter had so much to say, but they all caught in his throat as they slowed their dance. He managed to get out a proper, genuine apology for the way he had left things, at least. Unfortunately, he still had responsibilities as the event coordinator that dragged him away with a promise to talk later. They left him with a smile he did not realize he had missed so much. Baxter turned away quickly, hoping they did not catch the flush on his cheeks.
Later that night, Baxter let out a sigh of relief that he did not even realize he was holding when he led them back to his apartment. Settling down on the couch in the lobby of his apartment, he chuckled. With them nearly snuggling him on the seat, he fondly recalled the cabin trip they both took that fateful summer. Now older and wiser, Baxter was even more determined to set things right.
They talked. Well, Baxter talked and they listened attentively. For once in his life, he no longer felt like he was running. He had slowed to a jog, then a walk. It was nice.
He bared his soul wide open to them, told them everything, all his desires, turmoils, and hopes. Finally, he felt freeâfree of the chase he had set himself on. Their hand had made its way onto his at some point, and his heart stuttered at the gentle warmth. Oh, how he had missed them.
There was a certain melancholy in their eyes that Baxter so desperately wished to ease. However, they reassured him that their heart ached for his inner conflict, not theirs, accompanied by a gentle squeeze of their hand. He smiled.
His chase had finally ended. Instead, they now walked side-by-side. They were no longer running in two separate seasons, but together in the liminal period in between. Baxter spent years staring at the back of their head, praying they would turn around and spare him a smile despite how cruelly he had left them. Now, he was able to admire their profile. He drank in the image of them, basking in the warmth of the fireplace, eyes kind and gentle, greedilyâhe vowed to himself then and there that he would never let them go again.
Baxter slept more easily that night, knowing he had properly made amends with them. The thought of them sleeping peacefully just a door away made his heart thump. He made a promise to them and to himself that from now on, he would continue making up for the five years of grief he had caused.
They spent all day together, and Baxter found himself wishing it could be every day, even when their moms had given him a well-deserved talking to. It made him appreciate them even more, and he was glad they had parents who worried over their child like such. Baxter was surprised at how easily their moms had accepted him despite it all. Although they were stern with him, it was clear they cared for him as well, even knowing that they had hurt their darling child.Â
He now understood where they had gotten their empathetic nature from. They had heard him out and accepted his apologies with such ease, despite his five years of icy abandonment. Baxter hardened his resolve, silently vowing to himself that he would protect their heart of gold, no matter what.
Baxter assured them he did not expect anything more than friendship when he had made amends. However, he secretly hoped for more. Baxter knew he was already receiving more than he deserved for being friends with them again, and he would never push for anything more, but he knew his yearning would never cease. Although his chase had ended, the longing remained.
He was glad they had accepted his offer for a dance that night. They danced together briefly at the end of the wedding reception, but it had been cut short due to his duties as the event planner. Baxter hoped to make this dance something more personal. As they spun around the office studio, Baxter could not take his eyes off them. Their smile shone so brightly it hypnotized him.
At the final beat of the song, Baxter dipped them low. They held that position, and Baxter found his eyes darting between theirs and their lips. There was a fiery gleam in their eyes that made Baxterâs stomach flip and his heart pound faster. He felt his face warm and gently tugged them into him, out of the dip. He let go of their waist reluctantly with an excuse to get them both some water.
As they settled down on the couch in his office, Baxter decided he could not hide his feelings any longer. He still would not put any expectations on them, but he knew he could no longer keep bottling things up and hiding away.
Baxter confessed. He confessed again how he never meant what he had said when he left five years ago. He confessed how they were a constant on his mind and how leaving them was his biggest regret and mistake. He confessed how his heart had stayed with them despite having left Sunset Bird. He confessed how he had wanted to kiss them just moments ago.
His heart skipped nervously at their laughter. However, they quickly eased his nerves and worries with a deep kiss. Baxterâs heart fluttered. His breath hitched as they bit down gently, and his hands flew up to cup their face. They both panted when they pulled apart. Baxter saw just how wide their pupils had blown out, and he was sure his was matching theirs.
Both of them were giddy and giggling as they tucked each other into bed, lying side by side. Rather than the sleepless nights he had grown used to, Baxter went to bed that night sleeping more soundly than he ever had. He dreamed of summertime, splashing around in the ocean and sharing ice cream. He also dreamed of fall, strolling under the golden leaves together hand in hand, of winter and huddling under a blanket together, sipping on hot cocoa, and of spring, lying on the dewy grass, watching flowers bloom.
Waking up next to them was a delightful surprise. Baxter had almost expected to wake up all by his lonesome, mourning the pleasantries of the previous day. Despite not being a morning person, Baxter found himself content being awake. He silently admired the way their hair fell against their face and how the warm sunbeams gave them a golden glow.
Baxter had found himself loathing summers the past five years. For a long time, he had trapped himself running and running, chasing after a warmth he thought he would never find again. It led to a grudge against the summer heat, as it only served to remind him of his remorse.
Now, as he marveled at their sleepy state, Baxter found that he favored the sunny season. It had brought them to him, and he would not let go this time. He finally found that fire he had been searching for again. It burned bright, fiery, and passionately as his own personal sun in the form of his now lover. Baxter was done running, he was done chasingâthere was no longer a need to, since he had found his sun again.
thanks for reading!! hope y'all enjoyed this as much as i enjoyed writing it (oËâĄËo)
banner by @bbyg4rlhelps
divider by @strangergraphics
synopsis: it was only supposed to be one summer, but it somehow became five whole years for baxter ward
warning: baxter's dlc spoilers ofc; been a while since i've played the game, so might not be entirely canon-compliant; tried to make reader as ambiguous as possible, lmk if there's anything that says otherwise! also contains mild olnf spoilers (baxter's relationship with the boys club members); lots and lots of yearning
notes: i love love loveee this game sm and since it is fall i had to write for our favorite fall representative!!
It was only supposed to be one summer. One summer away from his stifling parents, a chance to prove he was better than who they raised him to be. When Baxter left that summer, he thought that would be it. He thought he could leave with a simple, warm memory that he could look back fondly on. Despite the bitter ending he had with them, his sunshine of a neighbor, the majority of the summer remained sweet and untainted in his mind.
He was okay for the first few months, or at least he convinced himself he was. When met with a sharp twinge of guilt for the way he had ended things with his sweet neighbor, Baxter shoved the feeling down, locked it up, and threw the key away. College kept him busy enough as it did. He did not need that feeling gnawing away at his conscience as well.
People came and went. He smiled, putting on an outgoing, charming persona, the same one he displayed when he first arrived at Sunset Bird. The same one that slowly washed away when met with earnestness and sincerity. However, he had no use for his own genuineness anymore. Nobody stayed in his life long or got close enoughâhe made sure of it.
Baxter lived through the rest of his college years that way. It was better like this, he tried to convince himself. He was already so used to his act of suavity that he thought it would be easier. He made sure people liked him, but never enough to hold any expectations of him. The only expectations he had of himself would be determined by him and himself only. An occasional thought of itâs lonely would be swiftly brushed under a rug. He could deal with it in exchange for the protection of familiarity.
Holding an act for people was not something new to Baxter. It was tiring, but had become routine for him. He knew his parents would never approve of his feelings for Qiu. Despite being a few years older, he was hopelessly charmed by the ballet dancer. Baxter found himself clinging to the other boy in a way he had never clung before.
His parents never masked their dismay with Baxterâs friend group, nor their friendship, throughout the years, so they certainly would not have changed their minds just because of his feelings. So he acted. Baxter pretended his chest did not squeeze when he was near Qiu. He pretended to be disinterested in what his dear friends had to say. He distanced himself from everyone in Golden Grove. It made his judgmental and bigoted parents marginally happier, allowing him to live another day without confrontation.
Baxter had comforted himself with the thought of the new family that moved into Qiuâs cul-de-sac. The mother and child duo were quite charming, and Baxter had no doubt that they would keep his friends safe from criticism and happy, something he could not do himself. They had fit snugly into the friend group with ease, along with a bright-eyed, red-headed girl, easing Baxterâs worries. With that, he brushed the memories of his time with that party into a quiet corner of his mind.
Graduation came, but his parents did not, as expected. Baxter found that he simply did not careâwhy should he, when they never did? They had only sent him a simple bouquet of sunflowers and a plain card that had âcongratulationsâ written in elegant handwriting. His stomach churned as he held the bouquet in his hands, the wrapper crinkling under his tight grip. Of all the flowers, it just had to be the one that bombarded him with thoughts of that summer. The summer he was greeted with a smile brighter than the sun. The summer he learned the warmth of keeping good company. The summer he chased after in his dreams.
Baxter found himself grimacing. The once sweet memory had turned bitter with each guilty thought he had locked away and suppressed. What started as tiny pinches of remorse eventually snowballed into stabs of shame and regret, all of which he stuffed deeper and deeper into the depths of his mind. As he lay in bed that night, he was suddenly hit with a pang of yearning. Baxter found himself unable to sleep that night, an uncomfortable nausea kept constant in his gut.
Baxter found himself back on the sandy beaches of Sunset Bird. He was quite proud of himself for finding a notable job as an event planner all by himself, without the influence of his familyâs money or name. He was content with this new start as a recent graduate in a new destination. In the back of his mind, however, he wondered just why exactly he decided to settle for a job in the place where he committed his biggest regret.
He made connections here and there, but no longer cared to maintain any friendships. He remained professional and just the right amount of likable to all those he came into contact with. As the seasons changed and months passed, Baxter had hoped his longing for a warm summer would go away, but it never did. It clung to him like a constant itch that he could not reach.
It had nearly been a year since he moved to Sunset Bird. A cold gust chilled him to the bone, despite it being spring. He could never quite shake off the numbing coolness in his heart. Baxter thought back to the time his sunny, temporary neighbor had dragged him out to the beach with their friends. They had somehow coaxed him to at least dip his feet into the gentle waves, their soft hand never letting go of his elbow, anchoring him. He could feel the sun-heated water lapping at his ankles and the sand tickling the soles of his feet. He missed the heat that radiated from the sun and from their hand. He hoped the memory of it would be enough to ward off the biting winds that tormented him.
As desperately as he tried to cling to the sun-kissed memory, he was no match against the brewing storm. The warm waters churned and splashed, turning into a freezing whirlpool that dragged him further and further away from the surface. No matter how hard he fought against the violent currents, he was being yanked relentlessly to the ocean floor, just as he had always feared it would. He could no longer feel the safe, grounding hold they once had on him.
It hit him then. Summer took all the warmth and joy with them, leaving Fall with a chilly breeze and longing for something he could never reach. No matter who or what Baxter pursued, Fall would always be chasing after Summer. The thought settled like a deep, cold, unending pit in his stomach. Baxter clenched his fist, fingernails digging deep into his palms. The pinch was no comparison to the sudden ache in his chest.
The moment their eyes met, his walls dropped. He shook himself out of his dazeâhe was quick to guard himself again. What are you guarding? He asked himself. Memories from summer five years ago flashed through Baxterâs mind. He had nothing he needed to protect himself from. In fact, he would not be surprised if they had their walls up instead. He could tell from just a glance how deeply he had wounded them. He did not deserve them, just like he had first thought when he left them abandoned at his doorstep the night before he departed.
Forced to remain in their proximity to plan Jude and Scottâs wedding reopened many woundsâwounds he had created for both of them. Despite the hurt, he found their presence healing at the same time. As they practically relived their first dalliance, he found himself shivering less and less. Baxter found himself just as he did five years ago, greedily reveling in undeserved warmth and care. His chase was nearing its end. They were so close to his grasp, he was almost there. He knew if he did not end the chase himself, he would run out of steam and fall behind.
The wedding kept him extremely busy. He took much pride in how well it was going. The satisfaction of a job well done was just enough to keep his nerves at bay. Before he knew it, the wedding reception had ended, and he found himself face to face with the very person whom his heart had been orbiting the past five years. The sun was setting, casting a golden glow upon them as they reached out a hand, asking him for a dance. The light haloed around them as he spun them around, feeling lighter than he ever had been in the past half-decade.
Baxter had so much to say, but they all caught in his throat as they slowed their dance. He managed to get out a proper, genuine apology for the way he had left things, at least. Unfortunately, he still had responsibilities as the event coordinator that dragged him away with a promise to talk later. They left him with a smile he did not realize he had missed so much. Baxter turned away quickly, hoping they did not catch the flush on his cheeks.
Later that night, Baxter let out a sigh of relief that he did not even realize he was holding when he led them back to his apartment. Settling down on the couch in the lobby of his apartment, he chuckled. With them nearly snuggling him on the seat, he fondly recalled the cabin trip they both took that fateful summer. Now older and wiser, Baxter was even more determined to set things right.
They talked. Well, Baxter talked and they listened attentively. For once in his life, he no longer felt like he was running. He had slowed to a jog, then a walk. It was nice.
He bared his soul wide open to them, told them everything, all his desires, turmoils, and hopes. Finally, he felt freeâfree of the chase he had set himself on. Their hand had made its way onto his at some point, and his heart stuttered at the gentle warmth. Oh, how he had missed them.
There was a certain melancholy in their eyes that Baxter so desperately wished to ease. However, they reassured him that their heart ached for his inner conflict, not theirs, accompanied by a gentle squeeze of their hand. He smiled.
His chase had finally ended. Instead, they now walked side-by-side. They were no longer running in two separate seasons, but together in the liminal period in between. Baxter spent years staring at the back of their head, praying they would turn around and spare him a smile despite how cruelly he had left them. Now, he was able to admire their profile. He drank in the image of them, basking in the warmth of the fireplace, eyes kind and gentle, greedilyâhe vowed to himself then and there that he would never let them go again.
Baxter slept more easily that night, knowing he had properly made amends with them. The thought of them sleeping peacefully just a door away made his heart thump. He made a promise to them and to himself that from now on, he would continue making up for the five years of grief he had caused.
They spent all day together, and Baxter found himself wishing it could be every day, even when their moms had given him a well-deserved talking to. It made him appreciate them even more, and he was glad they had parents who worried over their child like such. Baxter was surprised at how easily their moms had accepted him despite it all. Although they were stern with him, it was clear they cared for him as well, even knowing that they had hurt their darling child.Â
He now understood where they had gotten their empathetic nature from. They had heard him out and accepted his apologies with such ease, despite his five years of icy abandonment. Baxter hardened his resolve, silently vowing to himself that he would protect their heart of gold, no matter what.
Baxter assured them he did not expect anything more than friendship when he had made amends. However, he secretly hoped for more. Baxter knew he was already receiving more than he deserved for being friends with them again, and he would never push for anything more, but he knew his yearning would never cease. Although his chase had ended, the longing remained.
He was glad they had accepted his offer for a dance that night. They danced together briefly at the end of the wedding reception, but it had been cut short due to his duties as the event planner. Baxter hoped to make this dance something more personal. As they spun around the office studio, Baxter could not take his eyes off them. Their smile shone so brightly it hypnotized him.
At the final beat of the song, Baxter dipped them low. They held that position, and Baxter found his eyes darting between theirs and their lips. There was a fiery gleam in their eyes that made Baxterâs stomach flip and his heart pound faster. He felt his face warm and gently tugged them into him, out of the dip. He let go of their waist reluctantly with an excuse to get them both some water.
As they settled down on the couch in his office, Baxter decided he could not hide his feelings any longer. He still would not put any expectations on them, but he knew he could no longer keep bottling things up and hiding away.
Baxter confessed. He confessed again how he never meant what he had said when he left five years ago. He confessed how they were a constant on his mind and how leaving them was his biggest regret and mistake. He confessed how his heart had stayed with them despite having left Sunset Bird. He confessed how he had wanted to kiss them just moments ago.
His heart skipped nervously at their laughter. However, they quickly eased his nerves and worries with a deep kiss. Baxterâs heart fluttered. His breath hitched as they bit down gently, and his hands flew up to cup their face. They both panted when they pulled apart. Baxter saw just how wide their pupils had blown out, and he was sure his was matching theirs.
Both of them were giddy and giggling as they tucked each other into bed, lying side by side. Rather than the sleepless nights he had grown used to, Baxter went to bed that night sleeping more soundly than he ever had. He dreamed of summertime, splashing around in the ocean and sharing ice cream. He also dreamed of fall, strolling under the golden leaves together hand in hand, of winter and huddling under a blanket together, sipping on hot cocoa, and of spring, lying on the dewy grass, watching flowers bloom.
Waking up next to them was a delightful surprise. Baxter had almost expected to wake up all by his lonesome, mourning the pleasantries of the previous day. Despite not being a morning person, Baxter found himself content being awake. He silently admired the way their hair fell against their face and how the warm sunbeams gave them a golden glow.
Baxter had found himself loathing summers the past five years. For a long time, he had trapped himself running and running, chasing after a warmth he thought he would never find again. It led to a grudge against the summer heat, as it only served to remind him of his remorse.
Now, as he marveled at their sleepy state, Baxter found that he favored the sunny season. It had brought them to him, and he would not let go this time. He finally found that fire he had been searching for again. It burned bright, fiery, and passionately as his own personal sun in the form of his now lover. Baxter was done running, he was done chasingâthere was no longer a need to, since he had found his sun again.
thanks for reading!! hope y'all enjoyed this as much as i enjoyed writing it (oËâĄËo)
banner by @bbyg4rlhelps
divider by @strangergraphics
synopsis: caleb believed the concept of safety and security was a myth until he met a little girl with bright eyes and a sweet smile who shared her apple slices with him
warning: half canon-compliant half made up shit, mild blood and gore (children being experimented on by EVER and reader's chest being cut open while conscious), children being experimented on but not much is explicitly described, non-sexual partial nudity of children (caleb and reader), a little bit of suicidal ideation, lots of angst
notes: this is sort of a mix between the current timeline and fallen cosmos au! this was tons of fun writing and i hope you enjoy :D
Caleb still remembers the day Josephine greeted him at the shelter. She strolled in, a wide, motherly smile on her face, but Caleb knew better. He had subtly shifted himself so that he was standing in front of the sleeping girl, hiding her from Josephineâs view. Josephine looked over, and her smile widened by a fraction at the sight of him.
She approached slowly, her palms up, as if reaching out to a wild animal ready to strike. Caleb felt just like one. Heâd never forget how cold and cruel Josephineâs gaze was as she poked and prodded at him without an ounce of sympathy. Although the older woman was far sweeter to the little girl by his side, he would never forgive Josephine for the atrocities she had committed against her.
He was never allowed out of his room aside from when they experimented on him or for meals, but he always found a way to escape. He needed to be there for her, even if a glass pane was in the way. He always watched with wide eyes and angry tears as they cut and yanked the girl apart until her heart stopped beating. Her screams hauntedâstill haunt him to this day.
Caleb shivered. Despite only being 10, he feels the weight of the world constantly crashing down on him. If it werenât for the little girl napping behind him, his best friend, he doesnât know if heâd even still be alive. Before they had met, Caleb had succumbed to his fate of endless torture he endured every day. He had lost his will and drive despite not even reaching double digits in age. Every night, Caleb silently prayed that he wouldnât wake up the next day.
He had been aimlessly trudging back to his room after lunch when a weight bumped into him, almost toppling him over. Caleb huffed, looking down to see what he had collided with. To his surprise, it was another kid, a couple of years younger than him, it seemed. He had grown used to seeing other children around, but never being in close proximity to any of them. They had set him apart, locked him away in his own special room, away from everyone else. He was something special, powerful, and useful, they had told him.
The little girl had grasped onto the rags they gave him as clothes to avoid her fall. He tried to pry her tiny fingers off but paused when she stared up at him with bright eyes. Caleb blinked, and the girl blinked back. He tilted his head curiously, and her head shifted as well, mimicking his. Caleb opened his mouth to say something, but the girl was dragged off by one of the staff members before he could get a sound out.
He stared as they hauled her down the hall. Though she did not actively put up a fight, Caleb could see the spark of ferocity in her eyes. When he returned to his room, he stood in front of the mirror. Dull, purple eyes stared back at him. His mind wandered to the girl. He had never seen as bright and dazzling as her eyes before.
The second time they met was during lunch a few days later. He had been poking at the plain, tasteless ânutritionalâ mush that was provided for every meal with his spoon. The sound of a tray clanking on the table caused him to look up. Across from him was the same little girl, the one with the bright eyes, whom he had crashed into the other day, clambering onto the seat too big for her. When she settled in her seat, she gave him a wide smile. Caleb raised a brow and studied her. They told him to always submit without question, but with the rare smile around this place, he couldnât help the questions that swam in his mind.
âWho are you?â he asked, curiosity getting the better of him.
The girl raised her right arm and wordlessly pointed at the band on her wrist. It read A-01. She looked at him expectantly. He copied her movement and pointed at his own wristband, X-02. He didnât know if she could read yet, but she seemed to understand.
His gaze drifted down to her tray. Alongside the lump mandated nutritional mush everyone was served for lunch, two slices of apples sat bright and red next to it. Calebâs eyes widened. Nobody ever got anything other than the mandated meal. The girl must have noticed Calebâs stare because when he looked back at her, she held up one of the slices towards him.
Caleb felt something in him flutter, but not in the usual way his anxiety made him flustered. It was something lighterâwarmer. For a split second, Caleb wondered how this simple act of kindness could make him feel so safe for once in his short, insignificant life. He cautiously plucked it out of her waiting hand and was rewarded with another smile of hers. This time, he couldnât help but return a shy one of his own.
He saw her every day at meal time after that. He had come to the conclusion that she must be special, like him, which allowed them to interact. Though the little girl never spoke, sheâd find ways to non-verbally respond to his many questions. Even though Caleb was the only one speaking, the two grew close in a short amount of time. He had even begun affectionately dubbing her as âpipsqueakâ.
âItâs because youâre so tiny,â Caleb laughed.
She pouted and rolled her eyes. Youâre older than me, of course, youâre bigger than me.
Caleb wrapped her in a tight hug despite the awkward positioning of them being on opposite ends of the table. She nuzzled her head into his chin. Although that was part of the reason, he didnât want to drag the mood down with his true thoughts. Caleb hated how demeaning it was to be referred to as letters and numbers, as a specimen, less than, and unworthy of a name. He refused to call her by the label EVER had tagged her with, he wouldnât stoop to their level and refer to his friendâhe smiled at the thought, his first friendâas such.
Caleb never saw her outside of meal time, but whenever he was called in to be experimented on, his mind would drift back to her bright eyes and the apple slices she so kindly shared with him. It anchored him, almost letting him forget the pain he endured. Caleb began looking forward to waking up the next day again.
Caleb was shaken out of his newfound reverie the day she had died for the very first time. He was being escorted by a staff member to the torture chamber, as he had deemed it, when he spotted the girl being escorted back from it. He knew every kid at this wretched place underwent some form of experimentation. No kid went about without at least a new scar every day.
He clenched his fist, digging his nails into the meat of his palm. The girl had her head down, silently shuffling next to her chaperone. Caleb figured since they never intervened when they interacted at lunch, they wouldnât mind him doing so now. He strayed a few steps ahead of his own chaperone to comfort the girl. It was never easy coming out of that despicable room. He wanted to wrap her up in his arms and make her feel safe like how he feels whenever heâs in her presence. However, to his horror, when she looked up at him, that spark he had grown to love and admire had vanished from her eyes.
She stared up at him blankly, as if she didnât recognize him at all. The girlâs chaperone glared down at him, but he refused to take his eyes off the girl. Something was wrong, very wrong. They had been getting along for the past couple of weeks now, he knew she could pick him out from the crowd as he could her. However, her current gaze said otherwise.
Caleb lunged for the adult next to her, nails clawing at skin. He hadnât been able to cause much harm before he was being tugged away, roaring. He spared a glance at the girl who watched everything happen with an eerie, dead stare.
âWhat did you do to her?!â Caleb demanded, struggling against the hold on him.
âNone of your business, brat,â the woman he had attacked spat.
Caleb fumed. A hand had been placed almost gently on his shoulder, and Caleb looked up. He shivered at the icy glare of his own chaperone. He couldnât move a muscle as their stare pinned him to the floor.
âHe should know, shouldnât he?â Caleb shrank a little at the condescending tone, âThey areâŠfriends, after all.â
The woman chuffed, âRight. Friends. Well, if you really want to know, she finally hit her breaking point and died. She doesnât even remember anything, which works in our favor. Just as planned.â
Calebâs head reared up in shock, âDied? As planned?â
His chaperone shoved his head down, âIâll indulge you this time, but you should stop asking questions if you know whatâs good for you. This little girl has something spectacular in her. It shouldnât be possible to revive her so easily after a death like that, but here she is, seemingly even stronger than before. More experiments will have to be done to be sure, but weâve only just begun anyway.â
As if they could predict his next moves, Caleb felt a pinch in his arm, and though he tried to resist, the anesthetic set in quickly. As his eyes closed, his gaze stayed steady on the girlâs retreating form. I have to keep her safe, he thought to himself as he fell into a dreamless sleep.
It was an endless, heart-wrenching cycle. It continued week after week, which led to months, and eventually, Caleb stopped keeping track. Every time he reintroduced himself to her, sheâd forget him the very next day. His hatred for EVER grew with each memory wipe, but he always put on a brave smile for her.
He heard the murmurs about how her evol kept getting stronger with each death. Caleb wasnât sure what her powers entailed, but he couldnât care less when her mind drifted further and further away, leaving her a pliant doll for them to play with. He seethed at their disregard for her well-being.
Caleb began plotting. He had snuck out of his room successfully plenty of times before, but he was fueled with purpose this time. He didnât care what sort of punishment he would receive if caught; He had to see for himself what they were doing to her. What wicked methods had they been using to torture herâto take her away from him?
He snuck into the experimentation room with ease, which unsettled him. It felt too easy. He had practically waltzed right in. He pushed his wariness to the side and made his way to the giant window that separated him from her.
Nausea hit him immediately, and Caleb felt his knees growing weak at the morbid sight in front of him. He leaned against the window to support his weight as he watched them. Caleb stared, frozen in horror, as they swapped to a new set of equipment. The girl lay strapped onto the table, tears streaming down her dull cheeks, eyes nearly rolled all the way back. He knew the feeling all too well. He hoped she had fallen unconscious, never wishing that sheâd experience the point where all the began blending together.
As if the girl didnât already have her chest carved open, her heart beating weakly in the open air, the woman who seemed to be the lead surgeonâif he could even call her thatâpicked up the scalpel from her set of tools. He wanted to pound at the window and scream at them. Hadnât they cut her open enough, stolen enough of her blood? He knew that the only reason she wasnât making any noise was because she had already screamed herself hoarse.
Caleb wished he could barge in and stop them, but he knew it would only throw a wrench in his plans. Theyâd simply knock him out and throw him back into his room, and give him an even more difficult time the next time he was on that table. With his evol locked away by his wristband, there was nothing much he could do. He was only a child.
Calebâs angry gaze flew across the room, taking each face into memory so he knew which ones he wouldnât spare if he were given the chance. He froze when his eyes connected with the leader of the operation. Caleb shivered under her piercing stare. She looked at him as if he were nothing more than a bug underneath her shoe, perhaps even less than. She held his gaze for only a moment before focusing back onto her task.
âLet us begin,â her voice rang out clear with authority.Â
Without wasting another second, she began cutting into the girlâs flesh with practiced ease. As soon as the blade touched her skin and the girlâs ragged screams hit Calebâs ears, he ran. He couldnât watch or listen anymore. It was all too much. He locked himself away the rest of the day and refused to go out for dinner. He needed to think, to find a way out immediately.
Caleb was surprised he hadnât been called in for a few days, but he couldnât feel any solace from it when he knew they were torturing her instead. He couldnât wait around any longer and stormed out in search of the girl. Luckily, he caught her as she was about to be escorted in. He clawed at the staff members around him, flailing like a wild animal. He managed to free the little girl from their grasp and stood bravely in front of her, separating her from their tormentors.
One of the staff members reached out to yank him away, but he bit down hard on the hand. With a pained shriek, the staff forcefully pried open Calebâs jaw to remove their hand. Caleb snarled, and he felt the girl fist the back of his shirt. Even though she was afraid, he felt glad that she was feeling something, rather than the deadness he had witnessed before.
Caleb nearly cried out of relief when theyâd pulled him into the room instead of her. Itâd mean theyâd given her a break. He had long vowed to take on as much pain and suffering as needed in order to relieve her of hers.
As he lay on the table, nude, save for his underwear, and strapped down, he closed his eyes and tried to calm himself down. Thinking of her sweet smiles and warm hugs always worked. Just as heâd begun to calm, a familiar icy voice calling his name sent his heartbeat skyrocketing with anxiety.
Caleb snapped his eyes open. Though he had only heard that voice once, he could recognize it anywhere. It was her, the one who had cut open his only safe haven in this hell without an ounce of humanity. The one who had eyed him down as if he were nothing but a piece of lint on the ground as he watched them poke and prod at the girlâs dying heart. He was going to be sick.
âGet the fuck away from me!â Caleb thrashed against the bindings on his wrists and ankles.
The woman gave no reaction, which fueled Calebâs rage even more. How dare she commit these inhumane atrocities and act like nothing has happened? She knew he had witnessed everything. It was almost as if she had left the room open for him to walk into that day, as if she had wanted him to witness it all.
Caleb clenched his fists and snarled. The woman merely gave him a brief smile before turning to set up her station. This must be his punishment for finally feeling an ounce of safety in this godforsaken place.
âYouâre incredibly smart for someone your age,â she said as she stuck electrodes onto his forehead, âYou should know there is no escape by now.â
Caleb simply glared at her, and as soon as she had finished setting up, the tests began. Caleb had been injected with more mystery substances than he even knew could exist, and his body and evol were pushed to the limits. Everything hurt; he was exhausted and miserable. It didnât stop for an entire week with little breaks, but he was grateful. He was grateful that he was the one on that table being tormented instead of his kind and caring friend. Caleb refused to cry on that table despite his every nerve being set on fire..
When they finally tossed him back into his room, Caleb wasnât sure if he was even still alive. He waited for them to leave before he would even attempt to push himself off the floor, but they didnât. He heard more footsteps coming his way, and they halted before one of them used their boot to roll him onto his back. In his pain-inflicted haze, he swore he saw an angel descend upon him in the form of his best friend.
âA-01 wanted to see you. Refused to eat and starved herself until we let her,â the man who had rolled him over sneered, âCanât have our best subjects killing themselves without our supervision, unfortunately.â
Caleb let out a weak scoff as his door closed and the escorts left. He felt a small hand gently rest on his shoulder, and he used the last of his strength to sit up and lean against his bed on the floor. Finally, he allowed himself to cry.
He could feel the girl fretting near him but he couldnât stop the sobs. He cried even harder when she wrapped her arms around his weak body and gave a light squeeze. Amongst his own wails, he heard her murmur, causing him to cease his tears.
âDonât cry,â her voice came out as quiet as a whisper, a little croaky from lack of use.
For the first time in months, Caleb no longer had a proper concept of time, he laughedâa real laugh. Seemingly startled by his change of emotions, the girl backed up a little and blinked at him with wide eyes. Caleb settled and gently took her hand in his.
âThatâs the first time youâve said something,â he beamed, the warmth of her hand traveling up his own and spreading into his heart.
The girl looked away shyly and nodded, âSafe. With you.â
Caleb felt the tears well up in his eyes but quickly wiped them away before she could worry anymore. He pulled her back into his embrace, kissing the crown of her head. The two held tight, not wanting to let go just yet.
âYou make me feel safe, too,â Caleb whispered.
Itâs subtle at first, the shaking and rumbling. Having been worn out from the extensive experimenting and testing, Caleb slept heavier than usual. However, the whimpering next to him snapped him awake immediately. He gathered the girl in his arms and held her tight while assessing the situation around him.
The entire sky was red, and the shaking got stronger. There was an ominous, dark pit looming above the building. He immediately knew this was their chance to escape, and if not now, they would be dead from the rubble of the current building anyway. Without a second thought, he helped the girl up and ran with her hand in his.
âPips, hold onto my hand tight, okay?â Caleb spared a glance behind him to check on the girl he was practically dragging with him.
She nodded frantically and squeezed his hand. Caleb wasnât at his full strength, but he pushed on. The building had already started collapsing, and Caleb held onto the girl tightly as he guided them away from the falling debris.
Itâs only when they halted at a crumbled wall did Caleb realize that their wristbands had fallen off. Perhaps during the chaos, with the building actively collapsing, the systems that controlled the wristbands crashed and set them free. Caleb watched as the wall crumbled three floors down onto the road.
He turned to the girl and said with a gentle voice, âWeâre gonna jump, okay? All the doors are blocked, and this is the only way out.â
As predicted, the girl shook her head, backing away from the hole. Tears streamed down her face. As much as it pained Caleb to force her to do something she didnât want to, he knew he had to. It was their only chance.
âWe can use our evols now, see?â Caleb showed her his free wrist, âI can get us down safely, but you have to jump with me. I promise Iâll keep you safe.â
Despite his own pounding heart, he had to make sure hers wasnât. His eyes flew to the loosening debris above their heads. He pulled her a little closer.
âJust hold on tight,â he begged.
The girl trembled and cried, but looked at him with determination and whimpered, âPromise?â
âPromise,â Caleb nodded.
Hand in hand, the two children leapt from the third floor just as the ceiling above them collapsed. The girl screamed in terror, and Caleb immediately put his evol to use. If he hadnât been so drained from the previous week, he probably could have controlled it better, but he was able to soften their fall.
Caleb quickly tugged the girl into his embrace as they shot closer and closer to the ground. He used his body to shield hers as they landed and rolled across the ground. With a pained groan, he sat up, inspecting the girl.
With no visible new injuries, Caleb pulled her back into his arms as she sobbed. He sniffled a little as well as he ran a hand soothingly up and down her back. He cooed at her in hopes of easing her wails.
âYouâre okay now, Pips. Iâve got you,â he hushed, rocking a little.
The girlâs cries eased into sniveling, âCalebâŠsafe.â
âCaleb?â He asked, pointing to himself.
The girl nodded, wiping her own tears away
âCaleb,â she pointed at him and then pointed at herself, âPips.â
Caleb nearly burst into tears then and there. His lips stretched into the widest smile heâs ever smiled. In return, the girl finally smiled back.
âThatâs right, Caleb will keep you safe,â he hugged her, teary-eyed.
Caleb was elated. He finally had a name of his own, dubbed by his very own Pips. With renewed vigor, Caleb stood and dusted himself off, and set off for safety hand in hand with his only friend.
The shelter was safe enough. Truthfully, Caleb wasnât sure if any place would ever be safe enough for his Pips, but for now, the shelter that had mercifully taken them in should do.
Throughout the months there, Caleb had learned many things. The first was that he had the deepspace tunnel that appeared in the sky for their escape. He later found that people had dubbed it the Chronorift Catastrophe. Despite eavesdropping hearing about how many have lost so much from the disaster, he couldnât help but be immensely grateful towards it. Without it, he wasnât sure heâd be standing there at all.
Caleb also learned that though they had escaped EVERâs building, the feeling of safety was fleeting. He was constantly wary of the eyes around him, wondering what two lonely children were doing by themselves with no adult supervision at the shelter. Especially since the girl didnât speakâshe only spoke to him, but even then, she did not speak muchâhe was worried people would view her as disrespectful and harm her. He kept the girl close to him at all times. Only in the dead of night, when even all the adults were asleep, could Caleb feel at ease.
Curled up under the blankets in the same bed as his best friend was the only source of comfort he had. As he listened to her soft breaths as she slept, only then was he able to calm the storm in his mind. Only when she clutched at his shirt, murmuring in her sleep, was he able to stop the constant warnings his brain would throw at him.
Eventually, Caleb learned to live with âsafe enoughâ. He had come to terms with the fact that nothing would be up to his standard of security, but he was content. As long as he had his Pipsqueak, he would be alright. That was until Josephine walked past the shelter doors.
âGet away from us,â Caleb growls, hackles raised.
The girl stirs behind him and slowly stands up and tugs at his shirt, curious as to what is going on. The older woman simply watches with a placating smile on her face. It creeps Caleb out how easily she can make herself seem docile despite her cold and uncaring eyes. Nothing can wipe the memories of her cruelty from his mind.
Caleb keeps the younger girl behind him as the older woman pulls out a couple of papers from her bag to show him. As he reads and processes the words on the papers, he can feel every ounce of hope draining from his body. She officially has custody over them, and Caleb is once again reminded that he is merely a child and there is nothing he can do.
âMy name is Josephine, and youâll both be staying with me from now on,â she smiles at them.
Josephine gently takes one of their hands in each of her own and quietly leads them out of the shelter. Caleb is numb, Josephineâs soft tittering falling deaf on his ears. He even lets her strap him safely into her car without a fight.
Caleb has never wished to learn her name or to see his greatest tormentor show up in front of him. Yet here he is.
Most of the drive is silent, and itâs only when Josephine finally speaks again does Caleb snap out of his thoughts.
âYouâre a smart kid. You should know there is no escape by now,â she smiles at him through the rear-view mirror.Â
Caleb feels sick. There truly is no escape.
The first few nights at their new âhomeâ, Josephine had been just so kind enough to let them share a room. Caleb wonders if sheâd somehow gained some humanity during their time apart. However, the thought is quickly dispelled when Josephine insists that the girl learn to be more independent from Caleb and sleep in her own room.
After spending months sharing a bed with the girl, Caleb finds it difficult to split from her at night. Even just the thought of her being one room apart has him feeling queasy and anxious. He canât protect her properly if heâs not right next to her. He puts on a brave face and departs from her with a goodnight kiss on the head, not wanting to scare her. Heâs just glad the girl doesnât remember Josephine and that she has settled in nicely so far. He falls asleep with great difficulty.
Caleb stirs in his sleep. Heâd always been a light sleeper, if he slept at all, due to the constant state of hypervigilance he was in while at EVER. His eyes remain closed, but his ears tune in on the rustling seemingly coming from downstairs. He slowly opens his eyes and squints at the clock by his bedside. It is 2 in the morning.
The boy tosses the blankets off his body and sits up. Josephine should be asleep or tinkering away with something, he tries not to dwell on what torture devices she could possibly be working on in her own room. Caleb swings his feet off the bed, toes curling slightly at the coolness of the floor. Rubbing his eyes, he makes his way out of his room and towards the room next to his.
He is surprised to see the door wide open already. Caleb peeks in and sure enough, the bed is empty. He panics quietly, worrying over the girl he had come to this new âhomeâ with. Calebâs head whips towards Josephineâs door down the hall. The lights are still on, casting a soft glow through the cracks of the door. He only sees one shadow, which he recognizes as Josephineâs, and lets out a sigh of relief. His Pips isnât in the room with that monster.
Caleb makes his way downstairs as quietly as possible and ventures around in the dark. He spots a familiar head of tangled, bed-mussed hair. He lets out a breath of relief he didnât even know he was holding. He makes his way over while making some noise so as not to startle her. She turns around at the sound of his footsteps and beams.
âWhat are you doing down here, Pips? Canât sleep?â Caleb whispers.
The girl shakes her head, âCalebâŠheard you tossing and turning. Just wanted to get you a cup of water.â
She brings out her hand from behind her back and reveals the empty cup sheâs holding. Caleb simply chuckles affectionately before taking the cup from her and filling it up himself. He drinks a little before offering the girl the cup, which she drinks from thankfully.
âThank you for thinking of me. Letâs go back to bed now, yeah?â Caleb sets the now-empty cup in the sink.
He takes her hand and starts to head towards the stairs, but is met with resistance. He looks back, and the girl is tugging at his hand. He gives her a concerned look, and the girl looks away, seemingly not knowing what to say. Caleb ushers her towards the couch instead.
They sit for a while and eventually lie across the couch, cuddling close. Caleb gently strokes her head as she presses close against him. They remain in comfortable silence for a while.
âCaleb,â the girl whispers, and he pauses his patting.
âYeah?â He mumbles back, wrapping his arms around her instead.
âCaleb, you always keep me safe,â she nuzzles into his chest, âI will keep you safe too.â
At her quiet, sleepy words, Caleb holds her a little bit tighter. He feels her breath slowing down, and he gives her a kiss on the head. He closes his eyes with a content smile. As he dozes off, Caleb thinks to himself that he might just be able to feel safe after all.
thank you for reading this! i haven't really seriously written anything in a while, but hopefully this was still a fun read!
synopsis: despite the hot new tattoo artist working right across from her, yachi canât bring herself to do more than daydream about her. when y/n comes in wanting to learn more about floristry for a job, will yachi be able to bond and get with the girl of her dreams or will she keep hiding in the sidelines to protect her delicate feelings?
the vibes: tattoo shop and flower shop AU, opposites attract, black cat x golden retriever, sapphic romance and sapphic angst, new beginnings
progress: completed
warning: contains internalized homophobia, profanity, potentially more mature topics, some mental health talk, drinking, potential ooc-ness, canon divergence!!
notes: please ignore the timestamps and amount of likes/retweets/comments!! i was too lazy to put in random numbers on all of them; all characters are in their 20s, light mode is yachiâs pov and dark mode is y/nâs!!
written parts are indicated by âź
profiles
crow inks || daisy chains
chapters
bouquet 1: Purple Gloxinia (love at first sight)
bouquet 2: Acacia Blossom (secret/concealed love) âź
bouquet 3: Yellow Tulips (happiness and hope)
bouquet 4: Yellow Freesias (friendship, support, & optimism)
bouquet 5: Calaminthas (shyness)
bouquet 6: Purple Petunias (mystery and enchantment) âź
bouquet 7: Pink Orchids (happiness and playfulness)
bouquet 8: Striped Carnations (denial and rejection)
bouquet 9: Solidasters (support and good fortune)
‷bouquet 9.5: Sunflowers (joy)
bouquet 10: Colorful Dahliahs (devotion) âź
bouquet 11: Tarragons (lasting interest)
bouquet 12: Bleeding Hearts (heartbreak)
bouquet 13: Lotuses (relief and rebirth)
bouquet 14: Daisies (first love)
bouquet 15: Black Dahlias (betrayal)
bouquet 16: Purple Hyacinth (sorrow, regret, & forgiveness)
bouquet 17: White Carnations (embarking on a new journey) âź
epilogue
extra bouquet: Yellow Lilies (joy, happiness, & new beginnings)
flower dividers by @strangergraphics-archive
heart dividers by @jilval
Thank you to everyone who supported this series during the making and all of you who are reading it now!! It's been a hot second (read at least 5 years, lmao) since I've made a social media fic, much less published one. It means a lot that you guys enjoyed this series :D
Honestly I'm not sure what to do with this account now lmao, but maybe I'll start writing fanfiction again!! Lmk if there's anything else you guys wanna see!
A/n: 702 words in written portion! Last chapter guys!! Kinda wild how this series is done already but also it feels like itâs been so long lmao. There will be an epilogue tho so hope you guys will look forward to that!! đ«¶
Puffs of breath become visible in the chilly air as y/nâs lips part to form the words âIâm sorry.â Yachi watches intensely, processing everything she has just been told. The tension hangs heavy in the cold, winter air between the two.
Still speechless, Yachi stares at y/n with wide eyes. The blonde is unsure how to respond. Y/n watches Yachi in return, looking for any reactions. Her sincere and pleading expression molds into a sardonic one as she chuckles self-deprecatingly.
âItâs ironic, isnât it,â y/n sighs, suddenly finding interest in the ground.
Yachi lets out a confused hum. Y/n looks back up, a little bit of hope back in her expression at Yachiâs verbal reaction.
âPeople always judge me based on how I look. Like when people assume I drink black coffee or something,â y/n shuffles nervously as she explains, âYet here I am doing the same thing. Assuming everyone I want to date is going to be like Hanami. I know youâre not that kind of person, but I let my own doubts and old scars send my thoughts spiraling.â
Y/nâs head hangs in shame. Yachi shuffles closer to her and reaches for her hands. She gently laces their fingers together, shivering a bit from the sudden surge of warmth of another body. Yachi gives an encouraging squeeze.
âI shouldâve known better. It shouldnât have taken me ghosting you and Kiyoko straight up telling me to realize that. Again, Iâm really sorry Yachi,â y/n finishes sincerely, squeezing Yachi back.
Yachiâs heart pounds and squeezes as her eyes wandered over y/nâs face. Y/nâs cheeks and ears have been bitten red from the cold, but her eyes are bloodshot from held back tears. Yachi pulls her into a tight hug, her own eyes tearing up.
âI accept your apology,â Yachi sniffles, still holding the other girl firmly, âI know you were really hurt so I understand where you were coming from. Iâm really happy you were able to realize what you were doing and honestly I was just really worried about you.â
Yachi closes her eyes and lets her tears fall freely as y/n finally hugs her back, squeezing just as tightly as she is. She feels a wet warmth on her shoulder where y/n has tucked her face into and her beginning to shake in a silent cry.
The two hold onto each other like their lifelines until their speeding hearts slow into a sync. Yachi pulls away first and lets out a watery laugh as she wipes the tears from y/nâs cheeks. Y/n chuckles and dries Yachiâs own tears away in return.
âThank you for accepting my apology. Iâd understand if you hadnât, but Iâm really grateful that you did,â y/nâs arms slide from around Yachi to hold her hands.
Yachi shakes her head gently and intertwines their fingers. She rocks back and forth on the balls of her feet. Her face warms a little as y/nâs thumbs softly rub the back of her hands.
âI promise Iâll work on my communicationâŠif youâll still have me,â y/n eyes dart nervously between Yachiâs, her hands trembling slightly.
Yachi leans in and y/n follows, causing their foreheads to touch. She smiles warmly.
âOf course. I want to help put your mind at ease. All I ever wanted was to just be with you,â Yachi says, shakily, âLetâs work on our communication as jumping to conclusions together. I didnât mean to cause you any distress with my words.â
âYachi, you did nothing wrong. You donât have to apologize. It was my fault for putting words in your mouth,â y/n closed her eyes, focusing on the feeling of Yachiâs hands in her own.
âWell either way, Iâve never been the best at thinking clearlyâŠespecially when Iâm nervous,â Yachi admits, cringing at the thought of how she assumed things when y/n requested a bouquet from her.
As if sensing her inner turmoil, y/n gently kisses Yachiâs cheeks to ease her mind. The blonde flushes red, but returns the cheek kiss with a proper, shy one.
âWeâre in this together,â y/n smiles.
Yachi nods, âTogether.â
Fun facts:
This was the full precious convo from the first pic
Noya saw everything go down and was ready to take it to his grave until Tsukki brought it up
He fears Tsukki very much (and also Yamaguchi a bit after this encounter)
Hinata had drunkenly flung himself at Kageyama that night
And Kageyama, equally as drunk, forgot he was holding a drink and dropped it on the couch in favor of catching Hinata
Noya was eating an entire bag of hot Cheetos while he watched it happen
Yachi drags herself out of her door. Her heart never stopped pounding after she had received y/nâs request to meet up. Despite her anxiety and heartbreak, she cleaned herself up a bit and forced her trembling body out the door.
When she told Yamaguchi she didnât want to see y/n today, she hadnât been lying. Just the thought of her crush, which is truly beyond just a crush at this point, confessing to someone else made her head and heart hurt. She knows itâs an ugly feeling, but she canât help but let the jealousy bubble and fester until the tears start leaking out of her eyes. Yachi wipes them away, hoping to drown that cold and unrelenting feeling out with her tears.
Despite all the pain, jealousy, and slight feeling of betrayal from y/n, Yachi pushes on. Despite it all, she still wants to check on her muse. Y/n said it was important and even if Yachi wanted to say no, she would still show up. Even through the hurting y/n has caused her unintentionally, her place in Yachiâs heart cannot be shaken.
Yachi spots y/nâs lone figure in their garden far before she reaches the entrance. She halts her steps, frantically wiping at her eyes, hoping itâll look like she hasnât just been crying on her walk.
Y/n is facing away from the entrance, not noticing Yachiâs presence nearby yet. Yachi takes a moment to observe and calm herself.
Yachiâs heart clenches painfully. Y/n stands there in her favorite leather jacket, one that Yachi has had the honor of wearing, and her hair done up nicer than usual. Looking more closely, Yachi notices that y/n seems to have dressed up a bit even. She glances down at her own outfit which was thoughtlessly put together amidst her self pitying.
The blonde shakes her head and takes a deep breath. This isnât about her or what she looks like right now. Definitely not the time to be comparing herself to y/nâs ex or fantasize about how much cooler this so-called Hanami would be than herself. Sheâs just here to see if y/n is doing okay. Yachi marches on.
As Yachi approaches the garden entrance, she can hear the tattooed girl quietly mumbling to herself. She canât quite hear what sheâs saying but it sounds like sheâs hyping herself up. Yachi tries not to think about y/n throwing the bouquet back in her face.
At the sound of Yachiâs gentle footsteps, y/n finally turns around. They make awkward eye contact and y/n gives a small smile, hoping to ease the tension. Yachi returns the smile.
âHey,â y/n says softly, seemingly fiddling with something behind her back.
âHey,â Yachi gives a small nod.
âSorry to call you out here so urgently. I just couldnât wait any longer,â y/n sways slightly where she stands.
Yachi shakes her head. She canât bring herself to use her words, afraid sheâll burst out in tears as soon as she opens her mouth.
Both girls stand in silence, avoiding eye contact. Yachi hears y/n take a deep breath and decides to take one of her own. When she glances back at her, y/n is holding out the bouquet Yachi had made her. Yachiâs lips begin to quiver.
âOh, is something wrong with it after all? Iâm so sorryââ Yachi bows repeatedly.
âYachi, this is for you,â y/nâs words cause Yachi to look up in confusion.
Her gaze was intense and gripping, pulling Yachi in. The blonde subconsciously takes a few small steps closer to y/n. Her whole body begins to shake.
âW-what?â Yachi sputters.
Y/n closed the distance between them and gently takes Yachiâs hands and wraps them around the bouquet. Yachi gulps when y/n wraps her own hands around hers. The warmth spreads to Yachiâs cheeks.
âI really, really like you, Yachi,â y/n pauses, Yachi holds her breath.
âI want to start anew with you, hence the lilies. Our friends are right. I can't keep living like this, stuck in the past with my feelings chained by my ex,â y/n continues, âyou probably didnât realize, but youâve been helping me heal and you make me the happiest girl in the world. I want to be with you. If youâll have me, of course.â
Yachi canât look away. She takes in a stuttered breath when she feels y/nâs warm hand leave hers and up to her cheek. She gently wipes a tear. Yachi hadnât even realized she began crying.
Yachi begins to sob. The heartache and jealousy that had been poisoning her heart and mind had been instantly washed away by y/nâs little speech. She feels herself being pulled into a tight embrace. Yachi puts her own arms around y/n, squeezing tight. She can hear just how quickly the tattoo artistâs heart is pounding over her sobs. The fluttering beat puts her at ease, knowing her heart is pounding just as quickly.
âYeah, I wanna be yours too. I want it so bad,â Yachi hiccups into y/nâs chest.
She feels the girl release a sigh of relief. They pull away from each other a little. With a hand still around Yachi, y/n pulls a free on up to her face and wipes her tears away. Yachi giggles at the gentleness, her heart fluttering giddily.
âHad me worried for a second there,â y/n jokes, now gently caressing Yachiâs cheek, âthought you started crying because you hated the thought of dating me so much.â
Yachi aggressively shakes her head, âOh my god, no!! Itâs completely the opposite. Promise!! You donât even know how badly I want to be yours.â
âThank god,â y/n throws her head back in a laugh.
Yachi laughs as well.
âYou know, I was going to make you a bouquet to confess to you as well,â Yachi shyly admits.
Y/nâs smile brightens, âReally? What flowers were you gonna use?â
The blonde girl pauses for a moment to think. She smiles mischievously, âSecret.â
Y/n tilts her head in confusion in response.
Yachi giggles, âI promise you'll find out soon. I have to respond to your confession properly.â
âProperly?â y/n asks.
Yachi pulls away from the shared embrace completely and lightly wags the lily bouquet in her hand to bring attention to it.
âProperly,â Yachi flushes at her own words and brings the bouquet up to her face to hide.
Y/n laughs gently and pulls Yachi close again. Yachi cannot help but let out a squeak when she feels lips on her cheek.
âIâll be waiting then,â y/n chuckles.
Yachi touches the spot y/n had kissed with her free hand. She vows that she will make an even better bouquet for y/n this time around.
Fun facts:
When Yachi went back home, she couldn't stop thinking about how she actually lived through her own miscommunication trope LOL
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