hello vonnie
RMH
Mike Driver
Love Begins
pixel skylines
Andulka
@theartofmadeline
Today's Document
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
KIROKAZE
Keni
Kiana Khansmith
Sade Olutola
Claire Keane
Monterey Bay Aquarium
One Nice Bug Per Day
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Discoholic đȘ©
Aqua Utopiaïœæ”·ăźćșă§èšæ¶ă玥ă
will byers stan first human second
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@j0nawithazero
a person from 150 years ago would be terrified by modern stuff . however , a duck from 150 years ago would just be all like ,still got lakes? yes ? okay cool
âHow fleeting are all human passions compared with the massive continuity of ducks.â
â Dorothy L. Sayers, Gaudy Night (1935)
Reblogging again because I thought they changed the quote so I decided to look up the actual quote and itâs not fake that is very much the actual quote
Every single person who thinks Chikorita is forgetable is a little bitch. Chikorita grew up in a world against her, where the first two gyms were out to murder her and 6 out of 8 of the whole damn country is a gym sheâs not even remotely effective against. Chikorita had to struggle to get by and if you forgot her inspiring determination to Triumph in a world meant to destroy her itâs because you didnât have the will to help her succeed.
this is what living in the midwest is like and the corn screams back sometimes
idk why this made me scream so fuckin hard like in a world where kids can have fucking rockets on their legs and shoot acid from their hands the last thing you expect from someone is to pull out an actual legit gun
you guys really just donât check your fucking phones huh? you donât give a fuck and a half about your notifications? you just carry it around with you everywhere but donât actually go on it? maybe someone texted you. maybe you received an email. maybe you need to take your daily duolingo lesson. but no, you really just canât be bothered. fuck you
The Duolingo owl wrote this post
at least i dont watch anime
The conversation between my heart and my brain every time Iâm developing a crush
A visual history of black and white relations in America
Legit
im wheezing
start shit then play the victim lol o k a y
this video always has me fucking ded
Love this video
Can we all just take a moment⊠To appreciate
đđđđđ
duck emoji rates
my goodness look at the amount of detail on this one. the colors, the shading, everything is just spot on. you can almost make out the individual feathers. truly a marvelous mallard. 10/10
i see they went with one of those brown varieties of duck. while this is a bold move on their part, i feel as though it loses a bit of its personality. iâm just not really feeling this bird. 7/10
this looks like a modern colorization of the famous duck from the hieroglyphs. i am absolutely in awe of their dedication to the medium and commentary on the transformative nature of art. 10/10
look at this good boy! he is patiently awaiting a treat and i wish to reward him with a multitude of gifts. 11/10
yuck. 2/10
ohoho, what a dynamic three quarters angle! the artistâs ability to capture the essence of duck in 3d space is so refreshing to witness. 10/10
this birdâs looking a bit sickly, i think it has to do with the highlights being in weird places. hope he feels better soon. 5/10
a bit more minimalist this time around. the lack of legs makes it seem as though heâs resting on the surface of the water, and i really admire how it sets a scene and makes me feel like iâm really there. 9/10
iâm really digging the positive energy coming from this bird. i canât explain why, but i feel like that animalâs my friend. 10/10
this is a goose. 0/10
Iâm crying at the pure rage I feel from the last one
The first sin. Misconception is that Eve was the first to sin when thatâs not really all that true.
You see When God created everything and then Adam. He told him about the tree he said donât eat of it.
God never told Eve.
When Eve was in the garden being tempted read that section youâll find something interesting. Adam was right next to her and he didnât say anything. He was using Eve as a Guinea pig.
Eve bit into the fruit nothing changed she handed it to Adam. And when he bit into it their eyes were opened.
So really the first sin was Manâs passive nature allowing something to happen he was told not to allow happen if he never ate their eyes may never have been opened but who knows.
Originally posted by realitytvgifs
I was in a bible study we went over this part and I just sat there like âwait what?!?â
Yup! This is so real!
So what youâre saying is the original sin was man not fucking protecting his wife lmao
Adam was a fuck boy?
Omfg! Iâve had this argument so many times!
Apparently a theory is that weâre sinful because we have human fathers. Jesus was born of Mary without a human dad which is why he was pure.
đđ
All men are fuckboys
FUCK
All men Ainât shit for the bible told me so.
this makes sense
Can we talk about the visuals in this show?
what visuals you mean the fucking spawns of satan that scared me to death as a child?
i love cutthroat kitchen but bingewatching makes it really stand out how often alton brown refers to himself as âdaddyâ and makes contestants wear spreader bars
Iâm sorry what
you heard me
#I CANâT BELIEVE I NOW KNOW WHERE TO BUY THE EXACT FETISH GEAR THEY USE ON MY FAVORITE COOKING SHOW
@genericrevenge
OKAY BUT WHY THE FUCK ARE THEY USING SPREADER BARS ON A COOKING SHOW??!??! DOESNT THAT MAKE IT KINDA HARD TO COOK???!?
kinda, yeah
@datas-vibrating-robot-dong this seems like your speed
That logo looks familiar.
WHAT
OH MY GOD
the martyrs of EâąMOâąTION
Jdjdiendispvkfueb
DELETE THIS
My favorite video
I hate this fucking video so much
Does anyone remember the ââKwanzaa Cakeââ by Sandra Lee?? that thing was such a fucking trainwreck. she stuck fucking dinner candles in it the kind you use in a candlestick she just stabbed them in
âteaspoon of cinnamonâ idk sandra u sure thatâs enough
she just dumps a whole can of canned apple pie filling in the center. just. cold apple goo from a can
âDecorating is so much fun! use acornsâ
pictured above: corn nuts
not pictured above: acorns
Sheâs stabbing the cake so that the dinner candles will fit iâm crying
there she go
Now we just spinkle some unflavoured pumpkin seeds and âacornsâ on top of this chocolate-cinnamon frosting covered, apple pie filling stuffed angle food cake for that authentic Kwanzaa Flavourâą
sheâs cutting into it i have tears in my eyes it looks so sad
âkil me motherâ
âleT ME DIEâ
behold. the food of kings
this is what pure bliss looks like
I love this every time
Iâm going to add the confessional from the ghostwriter who came up with this thing. It originally appeared on HuffPo, but has been taken down. Hereâs the link to where I found it, though:Â http://www.eurweb.com/2010/12/woman-behind-sandra-lee%E2%80%99s-%E2%80%98kwanzaa-cake%E2%80%99-explains-debacle/
âThe Making of the Infamous Kwanzaa Cake
Okay, Iâm only going to say this once and then Iâm leaving the country. Seriously, by the time this post is up, Iâll be in Thailand. I think itâs better for everybody.Hereâs the truth. I wrote and sold the recipe for the Kwanzaa cake to Sandra Lee and, while Iâm confessing my soul, yes, for Christâs sake, the Chanukah cake, too. There, I said it.
Forgive me Father.
I can honestly say Ms. Lee had nothing against African Americans or Jews. She just has incredibly bad food taste. She was not discriminating about who would be harmed from her culinary âcreations.â Think what your taste would be like if you came from carnival or circus people. Did I just offend Paris Hilton?
When the Angel Food Cake Collection came to life, Ms. Lee was converting to Judaism herself for her new husband and she seriously wanted to bring her new âcuisineâ to an entire nation. Well, letâs put it this way, she wanted to sell a shitload of books. And she did. She wanted fame and money. And she succeeded. I believe thatâs often thought of as the American dream by many, isnât it? Note to all American Dreamers: This may be a good time to take a look inward.
I think I hear the audible gasps. Iâm wondering how long before the angry mob will be gathering on my front yard. Crap, will they bring torches? Will my neighbors call the fire department?
In my defense, I must start at the beginning. Iâve been developing recipes for cookbook authors and food companies for over twenty years. At least twenty of the fifty cookbooks Iâve ghostwritten or contributed to have ended up on the New York Times Best-Seller List. Many celebrities or TV chefs hire me because they are too busy to write their own recipes. This is not unusual.
In some cases, the âtalentâ, as they are known in the business, have no talent. They do not know how to write a recipe or even cook, for that matter. Therefore, as a trained chef, food stylist and recipe writer, I come in handy.
I sell recipes from $100-$400 dollars apiece plus the cost of groceries. I love it. Not only is it fun, creative and challenging, I get to study all kinds of food. Most projects are just plain terrific. Iâm humbled by the amazing people Iâve gotten to write and work for.
But (isnât there always a but?)âŠwait for itâŠwait for it.
One night in my office, at least 10 years ago, my phone rang. I answered it. If only I had noticed that my dogs started to howl and blood mysteriously started seeping from the walls. Alas, I did not. So excited to close the sale, I made an appointment with a personal assistant to meet âthe next Martha Stewart, only bigger.â I was happy to think about this latest project that would help feed my assistants.
It turned out that the premise of this cookbook would be âdelicious desserts with nothing made from scratch.â This book would be the second in a series. The first book was almost done, but apparently the writer, food stylist and recipe tester from that first book had all gone sailing in the Bermuda Triangle to celebrate and had disappeared. The books were being self-published by Ms. Lee, unless she could find a publisher, ASAP. She really, really wanted a publishing partner.
I âm not sure if it was because my head was spinning 360 degrees and my retinas had become burned by some horrible smoke that seemed to fill the room whenever she moved, but I wasnât grasping the concept. âNo fresh food. Just canned food. Nothing fresh, do you understand me? All food out of cans or boxes, so itâs easy for the homemaker âŠand write the brand name of the cans or boxes right in the recipe.â
I assumed it was the ten years of smoking dope in my formative years that was making me stupid. Then I thought, okay, this is another slant on The Cake Mix Doctor, by Anne Byrn. A book that had been wildly successful. I can do this.
Before you say a word, let me say one more thing in my defense.
I have people that depend on me for their livelihood. Assistants, designers, photographers, and especially my American Express Platinum card. I sign the checks, so I have to bring in the money. To make my small business work, I took the job. First time I ever signed a contract. Of all the truly big stars and real celebrities Iâve worked with, it was always just a handshake and my reputation for getting the job done that created the deal. To put it simply, I deliver what I say I will.
Ms. Lee insisted on a contract. Her attorney at the time also sold Mexican art.
Please, I canât make this shit up.
Fuck me; of course I should have seen the writing on the wall.
Thirteen months past and after exactly 151 recipes, I tried to fake my death.
Ms. Lee called and though we were done with the book, she needed at least ten extra angel food cakes for âfunâ sugary holiday times to sell to a magazine. Just a readerâs note, it wasnât Gourmet, but the magazine I designed those âadorable cakesâ for is still in business.
Read it and weep.
Please ask yourself, what would you have done in my place? See how that Kwanzaa cake is looking better from my perspective? I will tell you truly, the candles were her idea.
I guess I imagined something more refined. And I know the Corn Nuts were disgusting, but she didnât. As a matter of fact, the more tasteless the recipes got the more she liked them, the faster she approved them, and I could get home and drink some medium-priced wine after our meetings. Sheâs not a good role model for abstinence.
Get it?
The last words Iâll speak, before I board my plane and go to a land where nobody knows Sandra Lee, is that I had to fill the cavity of the Chanukah cake with marshmallows so it wouldnât collapse under all that frosting, and so that much-discussed pearl Star of David âcrownâ wouldnât topple. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Iâve never watched any of the videos on YouTube. My priest says, âNever call the devil.â
And to think, Anthony Bourdain was afraid of her. Crap, he was never even close.â
@sassking-trevor @peppapigvevo i am losing my fucking mind rn
THIS SHOW IS SO PURE!
Itâs worth noting that Kenneth spent the entire episode making the game (and the subsequent fight) as inclusive as possible for JJ and his disabled friends (all of whom were played by disabled actors/actresses).
BONUS:
Bonus #2
Of course I had to show the best part:
