it should be illegal for people to be in the kitchen at the same time as me
EXPECTATIONS
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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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Sweet Seals For You, Always
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occasionally subtle

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Claire Keane

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@jackbootedfucks
it should be illegal for people to be in the kitchen at the same time as me
"I don't think kissing turians will be necessary." "You never know, Commander..."
Garrus Vakarian+ not saying "I love you."
Garrus booby trapping Shepard’s apartment is a form of nesting.
I'm not immune to the appeal of a jealous Garrus who's keeps getting outdone by Nihlus (who lived btw) in ME1.
He really thought he was the only turian in your life, not anticipating a whole turian spectre to be on board already when he decided to join your crew. Garrus was already battling through his denial for being attracted to you—a human of all things, and now he has to deal with competition?
It doesn't help that Shepard was still a bit green during ME1 when it comes to spectre business, looking for Nihlus for guidance, taking his praise to heart, going to 1 on 1 training missions with him alone, definitely not causing Garrus to pace back and forth in the Normandy S1 cargo bay until Wrex seriously considers throwing a wrench at him because the sight alone is making him dizzy.
What makes it worse is how totally one-sided this rivalry is. Nihlus is absolutely delighted at having another turian on ship, always the ever helpful mentor, being a bro to Garrus in general whose blood is definitely not boiling inside. Damn not only is this guy good with a gun, but he's got a great personality, too! Ugh, he can't even hate him, yet he does nonetheless.
Garrus desperately looking for an edge, to gain any leverage he can to steal your attention...if only he had a cool face scar or something, that always makes them swoon, right?
Something that really stuck with me while I was playing Mass Effect 2, and that I feel was so important to understanding the relationship between Shepard and Garrus, whether you romance him or not, is that Garrus is your only companion from ME1 who never moved on.
You died. The crew watched you die. Assumedly they grieved you, there was a funeral service, there were tears and all five stages of grief. Things were rough, but eventually life took on a shade of normalcy again.
Kaiden/Ashley got reassigned and continued their work for the alliance. Liara fights tooth and nail to get your body to Cerberus, but then it’s out of her hands and she becomes an information broker. Tali goes back to the Floatilla, like she was always supposed to. Wrex becomes a clan leader. And yes, they’re all fundamentally changed by their time on the Normandy, but no one seems as stuck as Garrus Vakarian.
Because he doesn’t go back to the Citadel. He doesn’t join the Turian Hierarchy. He ships himself off to Omega, one of the most dangerous places he could be, and makes a life out of pissing off the most dangerous people there. It’s kind of a suicide mission, especially after what happened with Sidonis. He kind of figures he’s going to die doing this, but what else can he do?
There is no normalcy for Garrus in a world without Shepard, and I think that’s why he’s always immediately ready to come back to the Normandy. The Normandy, and Shepard, are home for Garrus and that’s why I think romancing him feels like the natural conclusion for so many femme Sheps, because Shepard feels that way too.
Of all the companions, no one needs Shepard to live more than Garrus, and no one needs Garrus more than Shepard. They’re perfectly matched, as lovers, as friends, as soldiers, as whatever they are in your universe and when you’re that perfectly matched with someone, you never quite feel whole without them.
No Shepard without Vakarian.
“Meet me at the bar. I’m buying.”
Turians in crop tops showing waist, you agree, reblog
Turians and Disability Culture Part One - Disability in Societal Structure
One of the best things about fanfiction and fanart, and just these personal worlds we have in our head is that we can create headcanons and personal thoughts for how we think the world functions which in my opinion is super neat. Mass Effect is very near and dear to my heart particularly for how inclusive it is, especially in terms of things like disability and tackling social issues. It's imperfect of course, but as a disabled person myself, what's perfect? I think it's simply more important that you try. Strangely enough, my Shepard is disabled and though I've been disabled my whole life, I've never been brave enough to make a disabled character that was like me until now! These are just some of my personal headcanons and you're of course, totally free to disagree with them. Now, onto the post! ------ Turians in general don't have a concept of disability in the same manner that humans do, and it at times, causes great confusion especially in their relationships with other races, particularly humans. It's stated in the codex entries: While turians are individuals with personal desires, their instinct is to equate the self with the group, and set aside personal desires for the good of all.
This would dramatically change how they'd both treat, and interact with the disabled amongst them. Unfortunately, human culture as we see it in the game seems to have progressed medically, but perhaps not socially. Given, that Joker is called slurs repeatedly, and automatically assumes when he speaks to Shepard in ME1 that he's seen as less competent due to to his Vrolik's Syndrome as a pilot, even though it has little impact on how well he does his job. (We really only see the lens of disability through Joker, the Mindoir Survivor, David Archer, and it's vaguely mentioned with military members with PTSD such as the cult leader etc.) Turians in general value strength and discipline, and it's clear in both their military structure and how they think of the greater whole, rather than just the individual. Given also, that Turians boast the best and most powerful military in the galaxy, I believe that becoming disabled in either training or in active duty is commonplace. As such, accommodations for disability in Turian society are seen as mandatory, and a right, as opposed to discretionary. Ramps and elevators in buildings, military outposts, and generally every building in Hierarchy space is required. Turian science also is one of the most advanced when it comes to accommodations for various disorders when it comes to mobility aids, relying on combinations of cybernetics, exosuits, and other training and uses. (In the original concept art for Saren, he also was disabled, using a biotic cane to walk) Rather than discharging disabled soldiers, Turians will simply accommodate them to ensure they are still able to serve the hierarchy in some way. Those disabled in action often later become advisors, serve in research and recon bases, and advise generals and captains on the best course of action. In fact, it is relatively uncommon for high ranking Turians in the Hierarchy military to not have some form of disability be it scars or cybernetics, and mobility aids, as such signs of disability are seen as markers of experience and a willingness to "die for the cause" as the Turian anthem proudly states. This also ties into why Garrus is so reluctant to fix his scars, as Chakwas states in ME3, as it's seen as a mark of his bravery. As such, disability isn't seen as something shameful or "less than" in Turian society, but simply a fact of life that must be strengthened or built around, rather than something hidden away. Most turians view disability as an inevitability, something that eventually occurs in some way for everyone. Next post I'll go over the social and emotional models of disability for Turian culture and how this works within their society.
Me sexting: what would you do if you found me with my hands tied ;) My feminist bf: I Would Free You
Someone: so what do you do in your free time?
Me:
there really is nothing better than getting asked an innocuous question and being like
I mean, in some very interesting Technically Correct ways, they didn't actually die? Now, they're very much no longer alive. But the forces involved are such that they didn't get any of the usual cellular processes of death, they simply went from biology to physics in less time than it takes a signal to travel down your optic nerve.
"from biology to physics" is the most metal fucking phrase i've seen in a long time
just casually leaving this here for no particular reason
You know what? Fuck it I'm adding more context. Sesame Street has talked about the topic of death more than once and it's done with such gentle carefulness without watering down or censoring the heaviness of the situations. It treats heavy subject matter with respect and dignity and has been for DECADES. From the early 1980s:
To 2025:
Hell, they even cover the devastating heaviness of MASS SHOOTINGS without censoring or watering anything down.
They've been doing this for YEARS, and it's ALWAYS handled with dignity, respect, seriousness, understanding, and love.
Whenever I see people censoring words because it "might offend" someone or the big ad companies that are currently trying to run everything? I just want to say to them: "What? Is Sesame Street too mature for you?" Because really...what the hell are we doing.
Mister Roger's Neighborhood also covered difficult topics with respect, age-appropriately, and without pulling a single punch. It's crazy that we've worked ourselves up so much that we're self-censoring like it's always been the norm.
This clip is from 1968 and discussed assassination after Bobby Kennedy died.
I'm not sure when this clip originally aired, but it was likely sometime in the 1980s. They talk about murder and, incredibly by today's standards, what sort of emotions (anger, fear, loneliness) might drive someone to hurt or kill other people + how we can manage our own difficult or painful feelings.