-- Jules -- @jasmine-jules - Tumblr Blog

luxfatale

copy, moon joy💫

tahthetrickster

it’s december 1 where’s the christmas tail kitten bring him to me

tahthetrickster

i have to do EVERYTHING around here

wizardarchetypes

thinking about the time also with some former roommates where one of them half jokingly was like "man i love monday because the kitchen is always spotless because Story cleans it on sunday" and i was like "what are you talking about" and they were like "you deep clean the kitchen every sunday?" and i was like "? no i don't i have absolutely no idea what you mean."

we went back and forth for 30 seconds and it got awkward really fast because it turns out all my other roommates thought i just had a compulsive need or some sort of desire to deep clean the kitchen every sunday and they just left me to it.

when in reality i was meal prepping for the entire week every sunday and when i finished i cleaned up after myself obviously—wiped the counters down, scraped gunk off the stove, scrubbed the sink, and swept the floor.

took me 10 minutes but always left it looking great.

then i didn't use the kitchen the whole rest of the week because i'd just grab my prepped meals in the morning and go out for all-day fieldwork.

but apparently nobody else ever cleaned up after themselves at all when they cooked. like they'd just leave food on the stove and counters and drop shit on the floor etc. and not clean it up so they thought every monday morning the kitchen was "deep cleaned" simply bc there wasn't old food on every surface.

i was like, "...........i've noticed the kitchen is always messy when i use it on sundays but i've always figured someone just used it and didn't get around to cleaning it up yet and i didn't mind because i'm always about to make a mess anyway............y'all just use the kitchen like that all week?"

and one of the guys (very funny, i liked him) looked around and realized I was the only woman* (*closeted at the time) living there and he went "this is really bad, like, optics wise."

wizardarchetypes

"I love it when you deep clean"

exwife-of-frankenstein

Youtube is full of ads, spotify is full of ads, tumblr is full of ads, pinterest is full of ads. Everything uses ai. Every new update makes the website/app worse. Youtube auto translates almost every video I want to watch. Sometimes pinterest only loads ads for me. Check out this new ai feature. Here's a new update that breaks ur laptop. Here's a new update that breaks ur phone. Why are u complaining about ur phone, just get the newest iphone lol. Join my patreon. Join my membership. Pay a monthly membership to get all features. Upgrade your membership to get even more features. Subscribe to netflix. Subscribe to disney. Subscribe to amazon. Subscribe to hulu. This content isn't available in ur country. This content was removed. This website was removed. This feature only exists for apple. This app only exists for apple. U need to a WiFi connection to play this game. U need an account. We need your email to finish creating this account. We need your number to finish creating your account. We need your id to finish creating your account. In order to delete your account please write an email. In order to delete your account you need a laptop. Oops our database was hacked and ur information was stolen. Ur data was sold from this random website u used once 10 years ago. Spam call. Spam call. Spam call.

depsidase

celtib

a ‘hot minute’ can be both a very short period of time, and a very long one. however, a hot minute in the past (“It's been a hot minute since I've seen you!”) is most often a long duration, while a hot minute in the future (“I'll be with you in a hot minute!”) is most often a short duration. this suggests some very strange things about the temperature of time.

theunusualchameleon

Doppler effect

m00npixie222

nerodiamusk

The fingertip to table tap of doom

angelicguy

Bro I love living in 2025 its like Ohh man why did I spend 200 dollars more than usual last month then you check the news and its like Trump Set To Ban Cookies & Milk

galileosballs

"I want to live in a world in which teenagers can fulfil their natural purpose of being annoying" and "I do not always want to be annoyed by the teenagers" are compatible sentiments

oojamaflip-whatchamacallit

#giving them a third space helps#they're still annoying in public as is their sacred duty#but they tend to congregate in specific areas of public where they can enjoy being annoying together

mikkimai

I've started on this path and now I can't stop ⋆˙⟡₊˚⊹♡. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁

wizened-beanie-baby-moved

"everybody hates me" factoid actually just a statistical error. The average person doesn't hate you, especially not your friends. You, a person who sits in your room experiencing self loathing every day, are an outlier adn should not have been counted.

fluffylandshark

coelii

This is sweet but I really thought it was going to end with someone named “Haters Horge” who spends every second in a cave halfway across the world just loathing you for no reason and they were the statistical outlier

vacuously-true

Don't be your own Haters Horge

homunculus-argument

You know you've fucked up when you go to a doctor and the thing you have wrong with you has been named after an occupation that isn't a thing anymore. Like imagine a doctor looking at you and going "yeah you've got ox-drawn ploughman's disease. We don't even test for that anymore. Yeah the reason you've never heard of it is because the last known case was in 1927 and happened to some guy who was like 98 years old and didn't believe in modern medicine of the time. What the fuck have you been up to."