imagine having sex with a ghost and then someone walks into your room and they see your asshole widening and narrowing for no reason
imagine praying to God and going to church

Kaledo Art

Andulka

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Origami Around

@theartofmadeline
One Nice Bug Per Day
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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
d e v o n
Game of Thrones Daily
Peter Solarz

blake kathryn
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
NASA
Sade Olutola

JBB: An Artblog!
todays bird
hello vonnie
Mike Driver
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@jaypige
imagine having sex with a ghost and then someone walks into your room and they see your asshole widening and narrowing for no reason
imagine praying to God and going to church
Just rediscovered potentially the funniest thing I’ve written in recent memory
Imagine if people wrote all their Les Mis modern aus in the style of Victor Hugo
An excerpt
God bless.
a raven father (i call him "pants") I've been feeding sometimes likes to sit outside my window and either wait for more food or just listen to the stuff I'm watching while I draw. Today's a colder day so he likes to fluff up a bit, and I kid you not :
this is an accurate representation of my view
Pants sure is pantsing today
Common raven (Corvus corax)
Oh my god, i love Pants.
CONCLAVE 2024 | dir. Edward Berger
Thomas Lawrence: i want to (remembers suicide goes against catholicism) be the pope?
God: hits the loudest incorrect buzzer of all time
when i say “girl” randomly as an interjection i’m speaking to the omnipresent all knowing being of Girl. asking her for mercy. taking girl’s name in vain
not now kitten, daddy has to write strange self indulgent fan fiction.
A moment of silence. No Pope has derived a title from one of the virtues for generations. Then applause of approval builds again. Holding the table for support, Lawrence sinks to his knees before the new Holy Father. Benitez stares down at him, smiling, thinking...
CONCLAVE (2024) dir: Edward Berger
it's been so long since i've been here that i'm not only married, but i've also trans'd my gender....
i'm here at wife's request but truly have no clue what i'm doing here lmao
jensen ackles: and then dean takes the mark of cain
karl urban who just really wanted someone to play golf with him: uh huh
2018: you wake up one morning to discover that one of your mutuals has started posting almost exclusively about kpop
2022: you wake up one morning to discover that most of your dash and apparently nearly every active user on tumblr has started posting about their best friend jonathan harker having the weirdest trip of his life on his way to transylvania to visit count dracula. yeah that one.
Poll: if your mom remarries when you’re 26 years old is that guy still your stepdad or is he just your mom’s husband.
The poll winner seems to be “depends on whether you like him” which is super valid.
Mine watches fox news so “mom’s husband” it is!
My family has a great way of distinguishing between a new spouse you like and new spouse you disdain!
Your mom/aunt/grandma/etc remarries and they are actually a cool person, you use their first name. So if you were to introduce them they would be: Aunt Jane and Bob.
If your mom/aunt/grandma/etc remarries and they are a fuckwad you introduce them as: this is Aunt Jane and her second husband. The implication being that they are very replaceable and that we’re all just waiting for her to wise up to the situation and serve you divorce papers, she did it once, she can do it again.
MAGNIFICENT
Alright, but what if my mom on her third marriage found a decent man, but my mother herself is shitty
"my stepdad's wife"
@sapphic-sargent your tags omg
You are doing God’s work
halloween AUs
Deep conversations and wow i wonder what you look like under that scary mask AU
Everyone thinks we came to this party as a couple because our costumes match what’s your name AU
Babe i know it’s halloween but we have to take my little brother/sister trick or treating before we can go out AU
Working together in a haunted house AU
You’re dressed as a sexy cop and oh god please arrest me AU
FUCK! YOU SCARED ME i’m so gonna get you back for that AU
Carving pumpkins AU
Working at a halloween store together wow try on his costume for me?? AU
Dare you to walk through this haunted cemetery with me AU
Ouija board thinks we should fuck AU
Aren’t you a little old to be trick or treating?? AU
This haunted house is terrifying please hold me AU
hALowlween auS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Credit/reblogable versions: [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x]
Enjoy~
25 Days Christmas Romance Challenge
Anonymous said to @alloftheprompts: Do you have any Christmas Prompts that could be used for romance? I was hoping for like a 25 days of Christmas writing type thing but I can’t find prompts that could be used for mini romances
I hope these help! ♥
Character A and Character B, sworn enemies, are chosen to prepare the company Christmas Party.
Character A’s best friend rigs the Secret Santa, because they know Character A has a crush on Character B.
Character A works as a Santa’s helper. Character B has a small sibling/child.
Character A is desperate to find a particular item (book/toy/etc.) as a present for someone, but it’s been sold out everywhere. Character B helps.
Character A and Character B are co-workers, but they barely know each other. But they both have to work through the holidays.
Character A and Character B meet in the ER on Christmas Eve.
Character A can’t wrap gifts to save their life. Character B is thir neighbor and can help.
Character A’s ex will be at the Christmas Party A is attending. Character B poses as A’s fiance.
Character A vows to do something nice for a stranger during the Christmas time. Character B is that stranger.
Character A and Character B both sign up for a Christmas Pen Pal project to exchange postcards.
Character A and Character B broke up, but now they meet at a Christmas party.
Character A is stuck working in coffee shop on Christmas Day and Character B is the lonely soul spending their whole day there.
Character A’s little sibling/child wants to meet their favorite celebrity/writer/person for Christmas. Character B is said “Christmas present”.
Character A can’t travel to see their family on Christmas, so they invite their grumpy loner neighbor Character B.
Character A and Character B compete in Christmas house decoration.
Character A bakes too many Christmas cookies so they share it with Character B.
Character A has to dress up as Santa for Christmas.
Character A and Character B have to save Christmas.
It’s Character A’s first Christmas since a tragedy.
Character A returns to their birth-town for the holidays. Character B is their estranged childhood best friend.
Character A is pretending to be their friend’s lover for the sake of the friend’s family. Character B is said friend’s sibling.
Character A loses a bet and has to wear a different ugly Christmas sweater every day till Christmas. Character B works at a clothes store.
Character owns a struggling toy store. Character B is looking for a Christmas present.
Character A doesn’t feel the Christmas spirit but Character B, who lives above them, keeps playing Christmas carols really loud.
Character A overhears Character B’s Christmas wish and decides to fulfill it,