🦠

Weird bug, no longer in charge of nighttime

[innerchildabortionclinic]

getting kicked off love island for just swimming in the pool and not talking to anyone

[evildevil42]

if i ever had godlike powers over the nature of animals i'd just make crabs smarter. like on par with crows or something. you'll walk out onto the pier at night and see a group of crabs working together to drag an unconscious man into the water. you can't help him now. he's gone.

[dogpuppy]

[ozempicofficial]

[imathers]

[cryptotheism]

ct my friend im moving soon whats the scariest painting i can put in the bathroom

Francis Bacon portrait of Innocent X

[cryptotheism]

Category 1 Papal Toilet Event

[flipchild]

[phaeton-flier]

I think everyone would be less (like that) about calling things Punk if they listened to any amount of Punk Rock and realized that it's most important quality is being bad at music

[notatzimisce]

I will never shy away from the word goon. goon is the only way to describe a particular type of henchman, lackey, or thug. look at these guys. they're goons.

[flareonfloof]

me and who

[fishpondfish]

it is impossible to watch a movie. every night i think i want to watch a movie. no movie gets watched. because it's not possible

[mousidy]

and yet they keep making movies with the hopes that one day humanity will discover a way to watch them. it's so inspiring

[theocseason4]

[theocseason4]

Black cilantro margaritas ladies!!!!

[kryptonians]

Tumblr’s one true talent is making me sick of things I’ve never seen or read or heard.

[oswednesday]

one time at a funeral i panicked and said the first drink i could think of and the bartender made me the pina colada With all the fixings all the trims all the bells and whistles i didnt even ask imagine youre at a funeral and the person besides you is drinking a pina colada with whip cream as tall as the drink with a cherry and an umbrella, thats what happened to me

[cuppydogshane]

the grink was there. it didnt change anything but it still matters that the grink was there.

[thatsoup]

They should let me go into every building I want just to look around

[3liza]

IDENTITY EMERGES ORGANICALLY FROM ACTION

[3liza]

IF YOU DONT DO ANYTHING YOU ARENT ANYONE. SORRY

[wowwforever]

if you told vin diesel fast and the furious you were gay he'd be like "Some people like driving stick…some people like driving automatic…what matters is you cross the finish line.." and then he'd rev up a dodge challenger and drive through a building and kill 16 people

[boogerwookiesugarcookie]

he literally did in the fourth one when he's asked if he likes cars more than women

[explorerrowan]

If you asked if he was cool with trans people, he'd probably say "sometimes, aftermarket parts are the only way to get the vehicle you really want. Everyone should have the right to hot rod."

[orcboxer]