you can call me Maddie

My name is Maddie as you might have guessed. This is basically a shitpost blog because I am shit and I post. PNW | Bisexual | Cisgender

[bacoose]

i can’t believe castiel went to super hell to turn georgia blue

[casualbaloth]

please god let me find these things out normally I am begging you

[red-mercer]

If you go to the circus for news don’t complain if a clown tells it to you

[radiation]

greco-roman? nahhhh im talkin about gecko roamin’

[radiation]

romp romp romp

[wizard--spells]

[daforged]

so when do yall think netflix is gonna add supernatural to the lgbt section

[jotaillustrator]

[airsignz]

good morning to women above 5’7, men below 5’5, bisexuals with clear phone cases, girls that hated the color pink growing up but like it now, college students ignoring academic emails, high school students that are cheating in all their classes, ppl who own too many candles or mugs, lesbians that had a crush on their best friend, ppl who have never watched one piece, ppl that don’t drink coffee or tea, girls that wear false lashes, men that wear chapstick, ppl that were dinosaur kids, and last but not least ppl who play as yoshi in mario kart

[jedivoodoochile]

Helena Bonham Carter, 1985.

[hotboyproblems]

does it scare you that in less than 3 months it’ll be 2014

[hoemami-deactivated20171229]

[justyour--averageamerican]

God damn, what a crazy hiatus. I'm back bitches

[pricklylegs-deactivated20250727]

[vampire-crimson]

what the actual fuck

[pidge-gunson-deactivated2018010]

Men don’t know women can pee

[eatyourfacecat-deactivated20250]

ive been sitting on the toilet for 20 minutes trying to piss but the pee keeps getting lost in my confusing Woman Body

[garbashians-deactivated20171116]

i haven’t peed in 16 days… my pee keeps running into the minotaur in the labyrinth that is my Womanly Excretory System

[wnq-writers]

Sometimes you’re so blinded by your feelings for someone that it’s difficult to realize that they do not deserve your heart.”

euphorickt  (via wnq-writers)

[themixtrovert]

“i can’t do that because of my religious beliefs”

okay

“you can’t do that because of my religious beliefs”

not okay

[therepublicofrapunzel-deactivat]

Morality is not subjective. If the Bible says x is wrong, x is wrong whether you are a Christian or not. You’re not exempt from the truth because you don’t believe it.

[pishposh-haberdash]

Except if you’re not a Christian you don’t believe that the bible is truth so….

[therepublicofrapunzel-deactivat]

Yeah and if you’re colorblind you don’t think the sky is blue. 

The sky is blue whether you believe it or not. The Bible is true whether you believe it or not.

[cheshireinthemiddle]

The sky is actually black. You specifically perceive it as blue and a colorblind person may perceive it as orange or grey. A mantis shrimp sees it as colors that you cant even comprehend.

Your views =//= absolute truth

[flowerinaflame]

[winestainedlinen-archive-deacti]

This show is everything

[champagnepuppies]

business majors will do coke off your ass on saturday night and then pretend they don’t know you in your econ lecture on monday morning

[blacklodge2]

fuck with a psych major then

[champagnepuppies]

psych majors will do lsd with you and tell you that they’ve never felt as connected to anyone as they do to you in that moment and then as soon as their trip ends they will spend the rest of your relationship disappointed because they know they’ll never feel as strongly about you sober as they did while on acid and when you take notice of that and comment that they seem to be growing distant they will psychoanalyze you and claim that you just think that because you have abandonment issues stemming from early childhood trauma

[gaterade]

fuck with an art major then

[champagnepuppies]

art majors will nut on your back and hand you their paint rag to wipe it off with and then when you don’t return their calls the next day they’ll make a painting entitled Succubus. 2015 (oil and tears on canvas, 36" x 48")

[laterinthecaveoflesbians-deacti]

Fuck with a film major

[champagnepuppies]

film majors will invite you over to “watch a movie and chill” and you’ll assume he means watch the first five minutes of something on netflix before getting distracted and banging but no. he has a french new wave film set up for the two of you to actually watch and you don’t understand french but he refuses to put on subtitles because he feels it undermines the artistic integrity of the work. when the movie is over he’ll undress you but not to have sex, just to “admire” your body. also he inexplicably smells like cigarettes even though he doesn’t smoke

[sourpunchfuck]

i am so sorry for your unfortunate mishaps with multiple major fields

[prokopetz]

Trainability in cats is a funny thing.

My cats understand and will obey a number of verbal commands, one of which is “go away”. I don’t use it often, but if they’re bugging me and I’m trying to work or doing something that could be dangerous for cats, I can tell them to go away, and off they go - they’ll only keep pestering me if there’s a serious problem they need me to look at.

That said, their idea of a serious problem that requires my attention is somewhat eccentric. Previous instances have included:

There was an unfamiliar car parked across the street

Their water bowl was four inches to the left of its usual position

One of them had puked on the stairs and they didn’t want to walk past it

It was raining

One of them saw a weird bug

[hollowedskin]

These are all very important things that required your attention. They’re doing a good job.

[blenderweaselhasopinions]

Dogs really aren’t much better.  I teach all my dogs the command “show me”.  How it works is if the dog needs something but I’m having trouble understanding what exactly they’re trying to tell me, I say “show me” and they lead me to whatever the problem is.  Usually they lead me to a real problem (like a toy that got stuck under the couch, their water bowl is empty, etc).  But sometimes they want me to fix things like this-

They pulled the covers off my bed and now they want me to put the covers back

They put their ball on top of the ottoman but the ottoman won’t throw it for them

The cat is sleeping and won’t chase them

A flower fell off the potted plant

The cat is sitting in a box and they don’t like it

One of them lost their bandana

The cat won’t take the toy they’re trying to give her

The cat DID take the toy they gave her and now they want it back

[kittypat-daily]

[certifiedcopy]