Cat Enthusiast

[bettedavisgf]

no offense to the english but i just found out england has only ever won the world cup once.. wtf do you mean “it’s coming home” she doesn’t even know you omg

[fairycosmos]

if i was in the world cup well i would just score a goal Lol then if the other team scored one i'd score another

[dykecinema]

Indeed will be like do you want to work for "Bible and Jesus"

[free-my-mindd]

[carnival-phantasm]

In love with this random guy who had a lock slapped on his storage unit for not paying its rental and not only did he ignore management and took his stuff out without paying, but also chose to steal the lock itself and send it to the LockPickingLawyer along with a confession letter

[carnival-phantasm]

X

[we-are-ninja]

@theoutcastrogue

[chibikuroneko13]

cant believe you didnt include the full sentence

[foone]

People always focus on the "lockpicking" part of his name and ignore that the lockpicking lawyer is, indeed, a lawyer, and can tell you exactly which crimes you committed in getting this lock to him

[cuppydogshane]

all the rights that come with marriage you should be able to have without marriage btw. you should be able to designate a person who can visit you in the hospital regardless of your relationship to that person.

[gallusrostromegalus]

A cat is a machine that turns proteins into violence.

[starathsbunker]

#Helios was declawed by his former owners so he doesn't just slap things he dislikes like most cats#he really only feels confident in hissing at them#Especially because a lot of the thing he doesn't like are bugs and those are sharp sometimes :(#Selene has figured this out and now when she hears him hiss she sprints over the kill the fuck out of the bug#Helios has learned she will do this so he'll hiss at stuff louder and louder until she hears him#A nervous old man and his emotional support homicidal maniac tags by @gallusrostromegalus

I couldn't reblog without the tags because the context is hilarious

[gallusrostromegalus]

A Nervous Old Man (right) and his Emotional Support Violence Machine (Left)

Yes, he is more than twice her size. Yes, he is five times her age. Yes, he cries like a big baby until she kills Unacceptable Scary Things (earwigs) for him.

[cm8x-insanity]

I couldn't get these two and their dynamic out of my head, @gallusrostromegalus I doodled them (guessed on their collars)

[gallusrostromegalus]

OH MY GOD MY CATS HAVE FANART

[avantgarden-er]

Me if i was a Sports commentator: okay so i would have done everything differently there at that moment. And correctly

[misscromwellsmonocle]

The Little Art Connoisseur (1863) August Friedrich Siegert

[darnitjack]

Last time this came around I showed my three year old and he said "He's little like me!" and stared for a whole minute (v. Long in toddler time).

[tpwrtrmnky]

When politicians say "we gotta appeal to the working class" you have to keep in mind that in their imaginations, the working-class person is basically a form of ogre-like creature whose existence consists of backbreaking manual labor and seething with Every Single Bigotry.

[tpwrtrmnky]

When he clocks out at The Factory, where he manually builds entire fridges from scratch using only raw materials, he has three interests: Car, The Pub and Sports. He desperately wants to vote for a center-left party but just can't bring himself to do it when they actually do something left-wing.

[saltoncity]

work tomorrow is one of the worst things that can happen to you

[icedbatik]

right up there with work today

[innerchildabortionclinic]

favorite genre of manosphere tweet. these are so funny to me. why are 25 year olds not conquering the world

[frailgun]

[dorfs]

getting overtaken as a pedestrian: people are seriously so caught up with themselves they can’t get somewhere 30 seconds later

overtaking people: come on girls it’s not a statue garden

[cappyclementine]

Heard the quaker oats guy is running a fuck a fan contest!

[cappyclementine]

I'm gonna be honest, I posted this and immediately forgot about it. Why bother, not like I'm gonna win.

[byjove]

I love asking people how their parents met. You always get an interesting reply. My best friend’s parents met on the relatively new internet in 1999. My other friend’s parents met at Burger King when one was the manager and the other was a regular customer. My parents met at the beach because they were neighbors in their rental houses, mom was on a church trip and dad was getting blackout drunk every night with his friends next door.

Tell me how your parents met in the tags.

[srdcovka]

anybody else not really feeling like working today

[ferricsailor]

no you dont masaru