[technofeudalism]

[thesinglesock]

my mom walked upstairs in her seal skin boots. Fjonka (my rabbit) came running to greet them (her seal skin boots). she sniffed them for a second. nuzzled them, before realizing they weren't breathing. horror dawned on her. she begun to understand she was dealing with something she couldn't comprehend. she backed off, without letting them out of her sight. she STOMPED to let them (the seal skin boots) know that she did NOT like this situation. my mom stomped back. Fjonka stomped harder, exhibiting a bravery and assertedness I had no idea she possessed. mom turned and went back down the stairs. Good job, Fjonk. You sure showed those undead vampire rabbits who's boss.

[thesinglesock]

This Rabbit has Witnessed the Horrors

[amateur]

[finntheehumaneater-deactivated2]

imagine you’re a guard for your castle, and you see this lady calling for help and saying she’s the queen, so you bring her in and everyone watches as she fucking eats the babies in there and just goes, “yep. Sure. New queen.” Because she got them, along with you, all high on psychedelics. And then she transforms into a giant fucking blue creature and crawls away, never to be seen again.

[godisafujoshi]

God forbid women do anything

[ashleyloob]

what's the most cancelable shit y'all do when ur not online

[predatory-lesbians]

sometimes i like to acknowledge nuance

[0v9]

if im being totally honest, the biggest reason I wish people on this website had paid more attention in english class and had reading comprehension is so that they would understand when and why jokes are funny. Maybe if y'all understood that a line like "None of these words are in the bible" is only funny because its totally unexpected. Or maybe if y'all understood how to construct jokes for yourself, we wouldn't have so many comments like "OP check your carbon monoxide detector" because you'd ALSO know how to build a joke. but anyways its the weekend so im fine about this. I'm normal about this. im NOT bothered.

[0v9]

anti-target audience.

[anexperimentallife]

[detectivehole]

i'm not actually mad i just like the comedic delivery of righteous but pointless anger

[animatedamerican]

[theroyalsavage]

[discluded]

[coughloop]

How many tears do you think he'd cry if someone pointing out this pronoun to him

[6vcr]

hello!

[8pxl]

everyone go follow and support her!! she’s an amazing pixel artist n is new to tumblr 💙

[ralfmaximus]

HOLY CROW

[teaboot]

ITS FUCKING PIXEL ART

[littlewhispersmokesigns]

60 years

[zeravmeta]

nice argument unfortunately i have already depicted you as the arrogant and brash monkey king leaping an infinite breadth to the edge of the universe and myself as the enlightened buddha whose palm you have not escaped for I am the great sage equal to heaven

[catchymemes]

[jewtea]

I'm appalled. they crushed that fucking baby appalled im now realizing this is more gorey than I anticipated. tw

[wyrmwizard]

[detectivehole]

hey i made a baby outta that

[ben-the-hyena]

This would be a beautiful donation to a children hospital

[what-even-is-thiss]

Well I would give a medieval peasant some spaghetti.

[what-even-is-thiss]

1. They don’t have forks. I would hand them a fork with it and see what they do.

2. They don’t have tomatoes. This is something they can never experience again

3. I would let them keep the plate because it’s a nice plate and I think they’d like it

[predatory-lesbians]

i love it when a post comes with its own FAQs

[good-fwiend-in-wome]

what the fuck do you mean they didn't have tomatoes

[what-even-is-thiss]

Tomatoes are not native to Afroeurasia and generally wouldn’t have been available on that continent before the Colombian exchange. When we refer to medieval peasants we’re usually referring to the poor of Europe and west Asia between the fall of the Roman Empire and the beginning of what we now call the Renaissance and Enlightenment periods. A time before the so-called age of exploration and colonization brought food such as tomatoes, maize, and potatoes to Afroeurasia and domesticated animals such as pigs and chickens to the Americas. European cuisine of the poor and rich alike before the Colombian exchange would still have been tasty with their wide selection of game meat, herbs, vegetables, and grains, but tomatoes would not have been available to them and that’s why I want to give a medieval peasant a plate of Italian-American style spaghetti with marinara sauce just like dad used to make

[juh-was-deactivated19691231-dea]

wait so. italy? i guess it’s not called afroeurasitaly, but…so “italian” food used to not have tomatoes? until they came from the americas? and they they what, decided “hey let’s just rebuild our national identity around these tasty christmas tree ornaments”? centuries of italy were lasagna-free and i’m just supposed to accept this

[what-even-is-thiss]

They had lasagna. It just didn’t look like what we think of lasagna today. It was more like layers of flat noodles with spices and cheese on a plate that you ate with your hands rather than a baked dish.

If you look at ancient Roman food there’s certain things we’d recognize as “Italian” like olive oil or fermented fish sauce or cheese but the flavor profile is completely different and pasta isn’t anywhere to be found. They also had herbs and spices that have since become unpopular or even gone extinct.

A lot of things we view as unmovable and unchanging about certain culture’s cuisines are incredibly recent developments. Modern Indian cuisine for example can be traced back to a singular guy in the 16th century. And these days lard is considered to be integral to making tamales but that wasn’t used until the Spanish brought over pigs and cows.

Food culture is something that can change very rapidly. Sometimes within a single generation. People generally use what they have available and what’s available can change at a moment’s notice.

[ailius-suffers-through-art]

This feels like watching a clown get questioned by the crowd before they pull out a history textbook and proceed to whack the audience repeatedly with it

[what-even-is-thiss]

That sums up pretty well what it’s like to be me yeah

[fucktheflagandfuckyou]

found a dude who does VR cruisin and boozin and im IN LOVE

[aueua]

Hey how are you ✨ [USERNAME]... my ոame is 💛 [NAME] 🍓 I'm [ADVERB] 💙 [ADJECTIVE] 💜 right now 🥵 and I'm hoping💋 yoս to [VERB OF FUN]😚 [HYPERLINK] 💦 please be 💚fast 🌸 I'm 😳 waitiոg😏 you here 🔥

[teaboot]

aw hell yeah mad libs

[jame7t]

What the fuck? You mean I have to walk an entire mile in this idiot who I hate’s shoes? This sucks

[jame7t]

nevermind this rocks