Sporadic Nonsense

Howdy! I'm Kort (he/him)(30), avid tabletop player, lover of animals, and social recluse! Hit me up, or don't, I'm not your manager.

[korticus]

Had to get gussied up for a work fundraiser, what do you think?

[xtec]

"you're just fucking the hints guy for hints"

-guy who's fucking the save guy for saves

[urmumsbriskit]

Am I missing extremely important context

[xtec]

Sounds like you should've fucked the hint guy

[wtf-scientific-papers]

Wang and Lai (2014)

[gemstone-gynoid]

[jewfrogs]

the change from AD to CE feels really emblematic of how surface-level and meaningless the supposed secularization of the western world is

[jewfrogs]

Common Era is definitely preferable over Anno Domini, if only because christ is no lord of mine, but it’s only less christianocentric in that it doesn’t overtly make reference to christ in its title. the benchmark is still the same. you’re still measuring when the common era began using the (supposed) birth of christ, separating history into “the period before jesus” and “the period after jesus”. this conception of history is no less defined by christianity than it was before, except that now it’s easier to ignore because you’ve draped it in a “secular”, “modern” veneer and done nothing to actually unpack the ways in which western society intrinsically centers christianity.

[iamemeraldfox]

Okay now I need a point in history that could be a benchmark to start counting the years from, and would be a common point for most of the world

What year would it be today?

[sarah-ankh]

UTC

Coordinated Universal Time.

The system by which every computer in existence now keeps count of the passing seconds.

And I mean that literally. To a computer system "now" is a number that represents the total number ov seconds that have passed since midnight on the 1st of January, 1960.

1960/01/01 00:00:01 is literally the beginning of time as far as a computer is concerned.

This would be the year 66UTC

[teleqwennevision]

I like this idea but if we changed it now then next year would be the year 67 which would make a lot of people angry

[depsidase]

[greeds]

[citruscubes]

i dont have no one can protect his womb from me but i do have

[slightly-gay-pogohammer]

hey gang i got popsicles pick one as pass the box to someone else

mint

lemon

orange

strawberry

cola

pineapple

dark cherry

anise

Voting ended onJul 14

"i cant believe you dont have this or that flavor" listen they had these ones okay

[veryberryskye]

yeah i like to give my blessing to the most pathetic looking weak little knight at the tournament. she can’t even look me in the eye when i give her my flower and she stutters out that she’ll do her best or something of the like. i think its funny when she has to cry and beg my forgiveness and i get to say “such a shame, i suppose my hand in marriage will have to go to someone else…” and then i get to hear her whimper like a dog. ive done this like 6 times alrea-

did she just win.

[the-stew-goblin]

I shall prepare a stew for the wedding! Extra salt!

[veryberryskye]

wait wait wait stew goblin wait

[peachdelta]

get ready for the wedding

[wtf-scientific-papers]

Submitter comment: I'd like to submit this '[s]tudy of defensive behavior of a venomous snake as a new approach to understand snakebite' not for it's topic (worth studying!) but for it's insane methodology, which... well, I'll just let the researcher speak for himself:

[Q: Why did you decide to do this experiment?

A: Snake behavior has been generally neglected as a field of research, especially in Brazil. And most studies don’t examine what factors make them want to bite. If you study malaria, you can research the parasite that causes the disease—but if you don’t study the mosquito that carries it, you will never solve the problem. Up until now, the popular wisdom was that the jararaca would only attack if you touched it or stepped on it. But that was not what we found.

Q: Why did you need to be the victim?

A: The best way to do this research is to put snakes and a human together. In this case, the human was me. We put the snakes inside a ring on the floor of our lab until they got used to it, then I stepped in wearing special protective boots. I stepped close to the snake and also lightly on top of it. I didn’t put my whole weight on my foot, so I did not hurt the snakes. I tested 116 animals and stepped 30 times on every animal, totaling 40,480 steps.]

From the recent (aptly named) interview: Researcher steps on deadly vipers 40,000 times to better predict snakebites

[dragongirl-casca]

[the-valyrian-weasel]

I could use some ice cream right about now

[deadpowol]

[tahthetrickster]

[jayteu]

Hi 👋🏻

[penandinkprincess]

parenting commitment level 3000

[penandinkprincess]

apparently a requirement for working at poison control is a talent for stand-up comedy

[starsarefairylightsfornerds]

[aqueerkettleofish]

When I was training to be a paramedic, we had one student ask the instructor what to do in the event of a marijuana overdose. The instructor said "Tell him to take two twinkies and call you in the morning."

[phantomrose96]

When you meet Edward Elric he gives off the impression that he's the short-tempered hot-headed "violence is the answer to all life's questions" kind of protagonist, and it's in fact incredible character craft that he's actually the character who ends the series with a negative-3 kill count.

[phantomrose96]

people killed: 0

direct orders of "you really really need to kill this guy" ignored: 1

ongoing murders being committed by Ed's own friends/colleagues that Ed got in the way of to specifically stop that murder from happening: 2

[phantomrose96]

God's worst soldier Edward Elric. Showed up as the youngest member of the Amestrian army, took millions of dollars from them, never followed a single order, helped dismantle their fascist regime, left with a lower kill count than he arrived with, then fucked off to go be a house-husband. Character of all time.

[aka-blaa]

You know, when you said "negative-3 kill count," I, who haven't seen the anime, thought, "He resurrected 3 people?????" But I'm seeing here on the wiki that apparently resurrection in this anime is a terrible idea.

[phantomrose96]

Official addition to this post.

[gondorrevealparty]

being a Bandit is pretty great. Just got a new place with a couple friends, in Doghammer Cave (long history of hammering dogs there). It's pretty nice for the area! Zero bedrooms zero bathrooms, but it's got a falling spikeball trap in the entrance and a couple big linear multipurpose rooms full of barrels. I put a couple gold coins in each barrel. Really makes it feel like home.

Our leader is Klade Doghammer (long history of hammering dogs). He's the only one of us with a name. He likes to sit in the last room (our house has a last room because it's linear) at a desk with a half-finished page of notebook about how he'll get revenge on the town someday. My best friend Female Archer Bandit said the people in the town don't even consider us human. She says if you stay a bandit long enough they kill you for money. Sometimes when she and I are alone on watch late at night I get a funny feeling in my bandit parts. I think I just heard the falling spikeball trap go off. We didn't invite anyone over today but I hope it's someone friendly. Being a bandit is pretty great.

[thethirdromana]

The worst types of cookbook:

The Ottolenghi - it is vital that you use 1g of this very expensive ingredient. It comes from a 500g bag with a one-week shelf life.

The time machine - 15-minute recipe! First, leave to marinate overnight...

The dishwasher - one-pot recipe! Now decant your ingredients and wipe out your pot. And again. And again. And again.

The optimist - cook the onions until caramelised (2 minutes).

The kindergarten teacher - get one nommable little tree of broccoli and bosh that into boiling water. Delish!

The brand names only - ingredients: Ritz crackers, Philadelphia cheese, Cool Whip, orange Jell-o...

The 1950s palate - use one (1) clove of garlic and a small pinch of chili flakes (omit if preferred).

The why bother with a cookbook - to make beans on toast, gently heat a tin of beans and put on top of freshly buttered toast.

[bannertanks]

[ghosthierophant]