what if you were home for thanksgiving and your mom was abby from 911 and your dad was dale cooper and they painted an accent wall in every room of the house and your mom got new dogs and named them all after maroon 5 songs and you used to be emo and are probably in denial about being at least bi and you went to your hometown bar where everyone hated your ass and you became friends with the girl who fucked your boyfriend and you sang welcome to the black parade at karaoke while your closeted brother kissed a boy in the men's bathroom















