I miss the sadness I felt at 16 I don’t want to be happy or angry or scared or co fused I just want that perfect sorrow back

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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

#extradirty
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YOU ARE THE REASON
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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

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@krunchykeyboards
I miss the sadness I felt at 16 I don’t want to be happy or angry or scared or co fused I just want that perfect sorrow back
$50,000 immediately dropped into my bank account wouldn't improve EVERYTHING but boy it sure would be a grand, sexy little start to a good, happy life path, don't you think
Reblog for unexpected $$$ dropping into your Bank account.
uhh did i forget how time works or was the first post in december 2018 and the second in august 2018
Reblog for time travelling $$$ dropping into your Bank account.
UNGRATEFUL tech companies are saying things like "turn off your ad blocker" and "we need your photo id" instead of "thank you so much for not just pirating our shit, youre so handsome"
Truth – An Alive, A Newborn, An Unborn, A Robot and a Dead
A Living Test!
An Alive
Would know!
A Newborn
Would search!
An Unborn
Would know, it did not know!
A Robot
Would not know, it did not know!
A Dead
Would not care!
"I" care - whoever or whatever "I am"; "I" Care!"
I am writing a book called, “I went searching for God and found Man”.
If there are any literary agents or publishers interested in my work, please contact me at [email protected].
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Source: Truth – An Alive, A Newborn, An Unborn, A Robot and a Dead
black and brown bloggers will describe a racist phenomenon in a slightly jesting way and white people will very openly flock to the notes proudly saying “i do that!!! xD”. No shame at all. Appalling, really
Like clockwork
to love is to be stained; my take on the "to be loved is to be changed" trend
My first "real" boyfriend was freshman year in highschool. He was a punk, dyed his hair, and liked indie video games. He was a stoner, partied, and stood up for his beliefs in a red state. We broke up after a few months. we were "pinfluencers". He was like my little brother after that. we dont talk anymore. he dyed his hair green.
the second hurt me more than i thought possible. blonde, christian, edgy and a rebound. he told me i could trust him. he didn't trust me. i dont think i ever saw my parents so upset. he liked "emo" and electronic music. his favourite colour was black and he drank too much. i havent seen him since december 2022, and havent stopped hearing about him since then. i still have dreams about those hands.
my third was something that simmered. i was subtle, but the feeling made my stomach burn. he liked stars, and felt like they were more of a home than earth could ever be. cat videos and horror games. i never told him about how i felt, until i got with number five. he was the colour blue, and hes my best friend still.
number four liked the twelfth doctor, history, and French press coffee that hed make himself. he was older by a lot and i was barely legal. he contantly ran from his problems, and when i finally accepted what he'd done to me he ran from me too.
four wasn't real. he faded in and out. hes catholic, but hates the church. hes trans, but the "right" way. he believed we were just friends-- thats what dating ws to him. his favourite colours were black and red and he loved pop music. he planned a school shooting once, before we met. i stayed longer than i should have. im ghosting him. i hope his mom is doing okay.
five was a blink. he was nice, but left me after a hookup. sometimes when i see him, i want to ask him why. he liked invincible and house md, and had audhd. his favourite colour was green. i dont wear that colour much now.
six is my everything. his favourite colour is yellow, and his hands are gentle. hes quiet, but talks more than me. he likes horror, cooking, and baking. we are fixing each other and ourselves. he listens to music genres i dont like; i love the music he listens to. he likes wrestling and k-dramas, and wants a cat called Tupac.
i think love is like a permanent marker artistically scribbled onto a mothers walls. like mascara stains on the ends of sleeves, or lipstick on the collar of your shirt.
i have stained so many others lives too.
I drink my coffee black, and it tastes best when i make it. I love doctor who, I cry when i see cats, and my favourite bands are MCR and One Direction. i have punk beliefs and know that the only way to fix the system is for it to be removed. i like youtube horror and freaking myself out by it. my favourite hobby is drawing and baking, i always wear some sort of jewellry, and i dye my hair often. its green right now. it used to be blonde. my favourite colours are green and yellow; the sun and the plants.
i sent this gif to a black cowowker at work then later asked my white manager if he likes apple fritters and he was like "i fuckin love apple friters" and she laughed so hard she got a migraine
Tryna fit the plot of Dracula into Castlevania
I know Dracula isn't really canon in Dracula, but I've been having ideas trying to fit Castlevania's Quincey Morris in with Dracula's context. So Quincey Morris right, born to the Morris clan. Ever since Richter Belmont handed off the vampire killer to them, the Morris clan has been protecting it, even promising to use it in case of emergency, possible testing it out on occasion. Quincey's father might've used the whip, and due to the vampire killer's magic, might've gruesomely harmed Quincey's father. Quincey was watching this go down, and grew up to fear the vampire killer.
Somewhat fearing his own family, Quincey ran off to marry some woman on the east coast. They ended up having a son, John Morris, and visited England fairly often to visit the wife's family. While in England, Quincey met one Arthur Holmwood, and incidentally, Lucy Westenra. Meanwhile, Quincey's wife grew somewhat frustrated with him, annoyed with him seemingly ignoring her in favor of the English countryside and his new friends. She also discovered his secret: His family was carrying the Vampire Killer. She was angered at his family's dabbling in the occult, and this was the kicker that finally divorced them. Quincey was left on his own, his wife having remarried fairly quickly and taking John with her. It was also around this time that Quincey learned news of his father dying, and that he was the main heir to the Vampire Killer. He very hesitantly took the Vampire Killer, but fearing its power, he locked it away.
Frustrated by his current predicament, Quincey decided to flee away back to England, not so much to move there, but merely to recollect his thoughts. He took his things with him, including the Vampire Killer. Meanwhile during this time though as well, Dracula and the castle was resurrected, albeit a bit weaker than usual. Some of his servants searched Europe, and found no signs of Belmonts, or the Vampire Killer. Therefore, Dracula decided to continue with his plans to gain power.
Here is where all the Dracula stuff happens. Jonathan gets terrified in Dracula's castle, Lucy gets sick because of Dracula, etc. While all of this is going on though, Quincey is in constant denial. He knows what's going on is blatantly vampire-ish, what he learned throughout his years, but he fears that if he points it out, he may get ostracized again, just as what happened with his wife and son. He begins to grow more comforted when Van Helsing shows up, but there's still on big wall in the way: The Vampire Killer. He saw what it did to his father, and he fears ever using it.
What finally kicks Quincey into shape, and a slightly differing part from Dracula, is when they go to visit Lucy's tomb. They find someone else there investigating apart from themselves: Alucard. Van Helsing knew Alucard, and upon talking to him, was confused as to why Alucard seemed to ignore him. He seemed focused on Quincey, and scolded him quietly about his duties as holder of the Vampire Killer. Vampire Lucy then arrives, she gets killed, and Alucard decides to leave the group of suitors + Jonathan and Mina to deal with Dracula.
When the group heads into Transylvania to deal with Dracula, Quincey takes the Vampire Killer, and once they arrive, Quincey uses the Vampire Killer to kill Dracula, but with this effort, he gets fatally wounded by both the whip, as well as Dracula's servants.
With his last breath, Quincey only wished for the whip to be brought to his son, John Morris. He then dies from his injuries.
i made a mini-comic with my characters Chipset and Database :] Chipset and Database's Tech Tips is now on itch.io for free!! 🖥️
learn about computer basics with them as they teach each other about their fields of interest (and make a lot of mistakes along the way...)
tell me something soft
im in love with strangers sometimes
the guy who asked a street musician to play his guitar for a bit, so i stayed to listen, and when he was done i gave him a tip, much to his amusement
the woman in a wheelchair i met at the bus stop who was visiting her fathers grave, and she later wrote and sent me a poem
a guy who i found lost in the woods with a dead phone, so i guided him out and contacted his family and waited until they came to collect him. he told me how he lost his leg in a fire while we were waiting
a girl in the bus stop who asked me for a cigarette, and told me about her issues with her first ever boyfriend, and genuinely listened to my advice
an old man at the bar who laughed at my joke, so i asked him for advice on how to repair my old radio, since he knew more about them than i did
and that are only a few recent examples, not even counting all the ones i have had online
the humanity is actually lovely, if you know how to see it
If he was successful
has this been done yet?
hey guys check it out I can do a frontside 180 with my stomach haha
hopital
just 4 u. I braved Phone Art while on Turbo Morphine (I think they called it dilaudid. it's Turbo Morphine 2 me)
oh ur super flexible? yeah well lmao can u do THIS??? (throws up and dies)
u know in retrospect my stomach shrimping wasn't even the worst part so far. it was the tube that went to third base with my floppy ass cardia. through my sinuses. just straight up cockwarmed a silly straw all the way thru my esophagus for 2 days
I'm a fool. a fucking fool. an absolute clown. do u know what happened minutes after I posted this.
I found out my body cannot handle opioids.
my muscles lock tf up and deliver the worst pain imaginable in every direction at once. I can't describe it. it's not just pain it's the sensation of every disgusting awful flu ache you've ever experienced in your life condensed into one square inch of your body, all over your body.
do u know what alternatives hospitals have to opioids? HA, HAHAHA
they don't
GUESS WHOSE HOSPITAL IS GETTING HIT BY A TORNADO
made the saving throw 😎 not today, Satan
Y'ALL WILL NOT FUCKING BELIEVE WHAT BIOLOGICAL PROCESS STARTED LITERALLY THE DAY BEFORE SURGERY
THERE'S ANOTHER FUCKING TORNADO
I'd love to say this has been an educational experience, but unfortunately I run on Spite and simply vow to torture my blorbos even more now
which is saying something while being in the Vivisect the Half Dead Child fandom
I LIVED BITCH!!
Stomach is back where it should be, I got some guts stapled and skin glued, and recited Dexter's Lab every time the nurses mixed powdered medicine in with my applesauce. I'm bored of drinking ramen and watching Resident Alien reruns so I'm gonna peruse the tags!
I cannot tell you how many times I unironically gazed into the middle distance and thought this
I've learned things can be true and also a shit post at the same time. unfortunately
starting to think maybe I've been saying this too much all my life and karmic justice just backed up in the pipes before exploding. still gonna obliterate those twinks tho. get back here Siffrin I'm not done with you yet
this guy is getting the true moral of this story
I HAVEN'T IN YEARS so either the AO3 curse has a disconcerting half-life, or it extends to discord servers and Google docs. both are horrifying and deserve a federal grant for further investigation
you and me both! isn't nature beautiful
you've made me realize my most recent fic in my gdocs is in fact the darkest thing I've written. so maybe all the ppl in the tags claiming AO3 curse aren't as wrong as I've been thinking they are
god's a bitch and I'm into omegaverse
I feel like I should get a medal for enduring something so fucked up that randos on the internet think I must be lying. yeah bro me too
did I stutter
honestly the worst part about all of this is the fact that I can't watch Murderbot. I want to so bad. but I refuse until I'm feeling halfway alive again
fuck life. I give myself lemons. AO3 on hospital Wi-Fi
you do not. like emphatically, I don't think that's a great idea
I'd say I'm sorry but tbh this seems very on theme for ISAT so
THANK you I need everyone to remember I'm a gamer first, god's favorite crusty sock in the bottom of the drawer second
the ARE a lot of people in the tags calling me Jesus Christ
I'll admit that one's on me. when I started being unable to eat anything, my first thought was not "stomach straight up saying the abdomen's haunted"
I hate that I was actually considering getting white haired anime boy haircut right before all this happened. could you fucking imagine
don't carbon date me like this
Rascal Flatts was right. life is a highway and it's riding me all night long
it my birthday.
it me im birthda birthday today yeah birthday boy wow im birt im was born today its my birthday wee im its yeah wow birth day today life birthday life annivnbirthdayversary wow im born im old wow birthdayb yeah
*tent reznor voice* i want to hug you like an animal
i want to feel you from the outside
my whole existence is fun
.hilson :3