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pairing: choi yeonjun x fem reader | genre / tropes: angst -> fluff, friends to lovers, post-breakup, non-idol au; ft. soobin + mentions of the rest of txt; reader is yeonjun's age (soobin calls reader "noona") | word count: 5.4k | warnings: post-breakup heartbreak, profanity, food, kissing
additional note: fic is mostly written but contains a few texts
summary: with his heart still aching after just getting dumped, yeonjun turns to you, one of his closest friends, for comfort. that is, until he kisses you - and your friendship starts to change.
author's notes: honestly i feel like if i don't post this soon i'll be dissatisfied with it forever and edit it endlessly and it'll never get past my drafts LOL perfect is the enemy of done!! anyway i wrote this while i was feeling stressed and insane during the holidays and wanted... an angsty kiss for whatever reason. lmao yeah
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when yeonjun arrives at your apartment, it’s still early in the evening; the two bowls of pho you ordered for takeout are still hot, and you’ve left your laptop open at a selection of cheesy netflix rom-coms. perhaps the selection is a bit ironic, but you mused that the feel-good escapism is just what he needs.
he pulls you into a hug and you give him an extra squeeze and a few pats on the back. you can’t help but ruffle his hair a little as he pulls away.
“hey, jjun...”
“y/n!”
“how are you feeling?”
“ah, a bit better, i think.”
he gives you a slight smile, and you’re too relieved to notice that it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. it’s a miracle to you that he’s even smiling again two weeks after his breakup. you still remember the cracks in his voice when he called you after it had happened, the rims of his eyes red with crying when he finally crashed at your place half an hour later. that night you held him tight as he told the story to you in between sobs: hana had broken up with him over a call that lasted less than a minute. she was bored and tired of him and just stopped caring, she said, if he were a toy she could throw away if she didn’t want to play with it anymore.
you swallowed back the anger in your throat back then, though you couldn’t help the tears of your own that fell. now you push the anger back down again as you lead yeonjun to the small table at your kitchenette, one of the bowls of pho steaming in front of him. now is not the time for indignation; your friend needed comfort, and it’s comfort you will give.
yeonjun’s eyes light up at the sight of the pho. your heart swells, and you don’t hold it against him when he sits down ahead of you and picks up his chopsticks, ready to dig in. in between slurps he grins like he’s just received the best present of his life. “this is so good!” he said in between mouthfuls of noodles. “it’s been way too long since i had this.”
“i know! feels like we haven’t had this in ages.”
“remember when we tried to make our own?”
“oh god, not that!” you laugh, dropping your chopsticks. “we got impatient and that broth tasted like nothing.”
“your kitchen smelled like ginger though,” yeonjun recalls with a giggle. “it was nice visiting for a while.”
“my kitchen smelled like ginger more than the actual broth, jjun.”
“maybe we can try again one of these days? and if we mess up, at least you’ll have a nice-smelling kitchen again.”
all you can do in response is laugh, and for a moment you forget that you stopped having pho nights together when hana entered his life.
he fills you in on video game night with soobin and kai, shopping with beomgyu, and his so-called revenge gym day with taehyun; he beams with pride while describing his new weight record just as much as he does when talking about managing a hard-earned victory over soobin at tekken. you laugh along with him, knowing that his friends blocked out their schedules just to comfort him for a day. and when you talk about your new project at work and the new books you bought yourself as a treat, his eyes fill with that indescribable look you’ve seen before. you can’t quite place what it is, but it reminds you of afternoon light, of summer days, of lingering hugs after a long day together.
you don’t need to ask for yeonjun to help you clear out the table and pick up the snacks you set aside for your movie, and you make no effort to resist. there are no words exchanged: he simply places all the disposable pho bowls and chopsticks together, and you reach for a clean garbage bag and put them all in. the only communication between you is a shared look and a nod.
perhaps it’s just your imagination, but that look lingers a little longer than you’re used to, and you can’t help but give him a satisfied smile.
you’ve seen him look at hana that way, too many times to count, especially during that early-dating phase when the thrill of emotions was still high. you wondered what it was like to be on the receiving end of that gaze, for yeonjun to look at you as if you were the most precious thing in the world. and you wondered if hana really was that precious 一 if she were just as precious to him as you, his best friend, if not more so.
you let yeonjun select the movie. at first you doubt your idea to present him with rom-coms, of all things, but you let out a sigh of relief when he happily chooses one of them. both of you have seen this one many times over, but you don’t mind. there’s comfort in knowing that a happy ending is guaranteed to happen.
the two of you are slouched on your couch together, the laptop balanced on a pillow between the both of you. yeonjun sits close to you, an arm around your shoulder, a gesture that he hasn’t done with you since he started dating. you let yourself lean against him (so that you can see the screen better, you tell yourself). the two of you start a running commentary on the movie 一 “why would he say that?!” “aww, they look so cute together,” “oh god, that was so stupid!” 一 and both of your laughter fills the apartment, the sound like a duet in harmony.
it’s so easy this way, you think 一 just you and your best friend in your own little corner of the world. you steal a glance at yeonjun while he’s absorbed in the final confession scene, a soft smile on his lips and his eyes gleaming with anticipation for the big kiss. a string of memories flash before you before you can help yourself.
“she said yes,” he says, his whole face flush with excitement. “she said she’ll be mine.”
his hands are on your shoulders and he gives them a gentle squeeze. “there’s no way hana can’t like you. you’re one of my best friends, i’ll make sure you get along.”
“i think hana’s mad at me,” he tells you as he fiddles with the beanie in his hands. “but don’t worry about it, we’ll talk it out, i promise.”
his head is in his hands as you sit across him from a restaurant booth. “i don’t know what i did wrong, she looked so bored through the whole date...”
you hold him close as he sobs in your arms, his whole body shaking. “sh-she said she’s... tired of me…”
“y/n?”
you snap back to reality as yeonjun glances at you, his head tilted. the ending credits of the movie have started to play. “are you okay?”
“i-i’m fine.” you reach out to touch his cheek, then hesitate. “are you okay?”
“i’m fine, y/n.” he picks up on the meaning of your words. “i know i looked really bad that night, but i’m getting better, i promise.”
“good.” your eyes meet his, and your cheeks grow warm. “we can have nights like this as many times as you want until you feel better, okay?”
“yeah, i know. i missed having nights like this, actually.”
“me too. i really liked it when we did this all the time...”
“i know. i’m sorry. hana didn’t like一”
“hey.” your hand comes up again and this time, you gently hold on to his cheek. “it doesn’t matter what she thinks anymore.”
“y/n... i’m really sorry. i feel like i neglected you, and you’ve been my friend for so long...”
tears form in his eyes, and you feel them warm against his cheek. you wipe them away with your thumb as you move closer to him. he continues to ramble as you do.
“i feel like an idiot. like a total dumbass.” the pitch of his voice begins to rise. “god, i was so convinced that hana and i were the perfect couple, that we’d be happy. i-i thought about her more than she d-did about me, y/n, and i stopped hanging out with you一 when you’ve always一”
“jjun, please don’t apologize anymore,” you say, your voice trembling. “i’ve never been mad at you over her, not even once. i just want you to feel better, okay? i... i just want to see you be yourself again.”
you want to see the yeonjun you’ve always loved.
you’ve lain awake at night wondering if he’s ever sensed your feelings for him, and if he’s ever felt the same way. on the day he told you that he and hana were officially together, you spent that night sobbing in your bed, convinced that your friend would never see you as a lover. and yet you said nothing of that night, and of other nights similar to it, because you told yourself that if hana made him happy, then you would be happy too.
and now you want more than anything to see him happy again.
yeonjun says nothing, but instead places a hand on top of the one you have resting on his cheek. you feel it trembling, but you don’t resist as he grasps your hand to intertwine his fingers with yours. he swallows hard to push back the rest of his tears, and his eyes soften. once again there’s that indescribable look of his that makes you feel light.
“y/n...”
he says your name softly, as if in reverence. his face inches closer to yours and you don’t pull away; instead you feel lighter than ever, your gaze falling to his lips as your eyes flutter shut. everything that follows feels slow, gentle; his nose brushing against yours, then your lips on his.
he kisses you slowly at first, but as you kiss him back you fill with a new fervor, wrapping your arms around his neck and letting him wrap his arms around your waist to pull your body flush against his. warmth blooms in your chest, and every movement of yours betrays your feeling: your lips moving against his, your hands making their way into his hair. you want to kiss him until the pain he feels has been replaced by the love you have for him 一 i love you, i love you, i love you.
you’re completely absorbed in him and let out a soft sigh when yeonjun snaps out of it 一 he breaks apart from you, breathing hard, eyes wide as he’s hit by what he’s just done.
“shit, y/n一” he gets off the couch, one hand running through his hair over and over again. “i’m so sorry. fuck, i shouldn’t have done that一”
you’re snapped out of your trance as you stand up to chase after him. “jjun, hey, wait! listen to me—”
he’s picking up his bag from the foot of your couch. he can’t even look at you, instead occasionally letting out a shit or two under his breath.
“yeonjun, please一”
you stand in front of him to block his way from the exit. at first his head is bowed, avoiding your gaze, but when he finally looks up his expression is solemn.
“you are not a rebound to me,” he says at last. “please don’t ever think that i just used you to make me feel better.”
“i never accused you of that! look, i’m sorry too, it was my fa一”
“i’m really sorry, but i can’t stay here anymore. i’ll make it up to you, y/n, i promise.”
“wait一”
yeonjun walks past you and before you can protest any further, he’s out your door. you push it open and try to chase after him, but after a few steps you stop, thinking better of it. what would stopping him even do?
you walk back inside and slump back down on the couch. the screen of your laptop faintly glows, and a half-eaten bag of chips has fallen to the floor. all at once the reality of what happens sinks into you: the kiss, his words, his departure.
you are not a rebound to me. the words echo in your mind.
a strange tension fills you, and you can’t even tell what emotion it’s supposed to be from: confusion, frustration, anxiety. with your whole body seemingly on edge, you grab a throw pillow from the opposite side of your couch and press it into your face.
you sob into it the tension crashes down on you in full force.
一
for the next few nights the scene replays in your dreams: yeonjun leaning in ever closer towards you, your lips meeting his in a fervent kiss 一 each night’s dream-kiss more fervent than the last 一 and him suddenly pulling away. you awaken each time just as he breaks the kiss, the shock and confusion coursing through you again, and immediately after you reach for your bedside table to check your phone.
still no text from yeonjun.
you consider texting him again, but each time you type a new message you erase it, the blinking cursor driving you mad. how would you even know what to say? do you want to apologize? to beg for his forgiveness? to ask if you can still be friends?
you hate to admit it, but every morning you lie in bed for a few moments more to allow the dream to sink in. the look on yeonjun’s face appears vivid to you, from his eyes blown wide to his mouth slightly agape. your mind travels back to the moment he breaks the kiss, as if a sudden force pushed him away, the shock of it hitting you. then it wanders to the kiss itself, the feeling of his lips soft against your own, his arms warm as they hold you by the waist…
you shake the memory away, drag yourself out of bed, and continue on with your routine: breakfast, shower, get dressed. you resist the urge to check your phone for as long as you can. you stare at the little contact photo you set of yeonjun and remind yourself: you’re his friend. you need to help him heal.
you recount your worries to soobin over snacks one day.
“i feel like i’m being selfish,” you say in between munches of potato chips. “he hasn’t even moved on from hana”— soobin winces at the acridity you mutter her name with—“and now one of his closest friends kisses him like she’s madly in love. how is he supposed to move on? he’s hurting enough as it is.”
soobin sets aside the bag of chips you just finished. he rubs his face with his hands as he tries to choose his words carefully.
“you’re not being selfish, noona. you sound like you’re trying to be careful so that you don’t hurt him,” he says at last. “and yeonjun hyung feels just as bad about it. he feels bad that he even started the kiss, and for making you feel like a rebound. you two sound like each other, to be honest.”
“i know he feels bad, it’s just 一 i don’t know how that will fix...” you wave your hands wildly in the air, “this.”
“you can start by talking to each other?”
“he didn’t reply to my last texts. and i… i don’t know if i should text him again.”
a moment of silence. soobin opens a pack of candy and chews on it, just to give himself time to think. he fiddles with his phone as he does, absentmindedly scrolling through his old texts, when one of them catches his eye.
“so, there’s this new restaurant that beomgyu wants to check out.”
“really, soobin, what does this have to—”
“he was thinking of inviting all of us there to hang out,” he continues. “including you and yeonjun hyung. we can plan for it a week or two from now so that you have space? and then you can get used to talking to him again there. if things get awkward, i can ask beomgyu to fill in.”
you purse your lips. “i dunno, i might cry if i see his face again.”
“if you don’t feel like it, just call in sick.” soobin’s mouth twitches into a small grin as he says it — you know he’s used that excuse to get away from social situations he doesn’t want to be in. now you’re starting to see the appeal of it.
“okay. i’ll think about it.”
—
ultimately you do decide to go, and two weeks later you’re the first to arrive at the restaurant. you can feel your hands trembling as you push the door open and your heart hammering in your chest. in your head you’ve prepared what you want to say to yeonjun and you mentally rehearse your words for the hundredth time.
you slide right into the booth and take a deep breath. you check your phone to keep yourself busy, letting yourself calm down until your hands have stopped shaking. as you’re scrolling through your camera roll looking at some memes beomgyu sent you, someone slides into the booth seat opposite yours.
“hey, y/n.”
yeonjun gives you a shy smile and the nervousness in your stomach kicks into overdrive. he looks much better now; the bags under his eyes have lessened, and his smile seems genuine. still, you can’t help but remember the last time you saw him, and you shudder.
he sees your reaction and winces, averting his gaze. when he speaks, his voice is soft. “y/n... are we okay?”
the question breaks you and whatever words you have prepared fly out of your mind. as you try to grasp at them again, tears prick at your eyes.. “yeah... yeah, we’re okay,” you say. you take a gulp of water to hold back the tears. “i was never mad at you, jjun, i’ve been worried out of my mind一”
“i’m sorry i never replied to your texts.” he places his hands atop your trembling ones. “i just felt so ashamed that i didn’t know how to face you.”
“and i’m sorry i never tried texting you again, i just didn’t know what you thought of me, and i was so scared that i lost you...”
“i was so scared that i lost you.”
you sniffle. “that makes both of us then. god, we were so stupid.”
“i missed you, y/n.”
“i missed you too, jjun.”
you let out a laugh of relief and he laughs too. with the sound of his laughter melding with yours, everything else seems to melt away: the tears in your eyes, the other noises of the restaurant, the baggage of the last two weeks. sitting before you is your old friend, holding onto your hand to comfort you, laughing together with you just like you always have.
and just as always, you want nothing more than for your friend to be happy.
“so,” you begin, giving him the most reassuring smile that you can muster, “let’s start over?”
yeonjun glances down at the table, but you can see his eyes crinkling as they usually do when he smiles. “yeah, let’s do that.”
when beomgyu enters the restaurant right afterwards, all it takes is one glance at the scene before him to understand what happened. he turns his head towards you, meeting your gaze, and you give him a nod.
it’s going to be okay.
一
the kiss becomes an unspoken part of your history together, never mentioned and never acknowledged. you stop searching for hidden meanings to it, and instead settle on the explanation that it was simply a spur-of-the-moment reaction from pent-up post-breakup emotions. it doesn’t matter to you whether or not this explanation is true; it’s the explanation that gives you the most peace of mind, and that’s what matters. as the days pass, you think of it less and less, and eventually it is filed away in your memory, like a book never checked out of the library collecting dust.
in the meantime, you pour your energy into rebuilding both your friendship with yeonjun as well as his fragile heart. the first few hangouts with just the two of you are awkward with a tinge of melancholy, with conversations feeling a little too short. fortunately, your shared friends are there to help: you and yeonjun are invited to video game nights at soobin’s, or a cute new cafe that kai wants to check out, or just a walk around the park. the silences feel less awkward when it’s quickly filled by a joke from beomgyu or witty remark from taehyun.
from time to time you see the shine in yeonjun’s eyes disappear, even for just a moment, when he encounters something that reminds him of “the ‘h’ word” (as beomgyu refers to her): a park bench where they had a date, or a dress on a passerby that looks a lot like something she would wear. sometimes one of his friends would recognize it and quickly divert his attention elsewhere. soon those diversions occur less and less often as fewer and fewer things remind yeonjun of her.
but things don’t truly feel normal to you until a month and a half later. your project at work has gone well, and yeonjun has completed the first draft of a mixtape he’s making. just as you muse to yourself that a reward would be nice, your phone buzzes.
that afternoon you and yeonjun stroll down the shopping district a few minutes away from his house, trying on this and that. it isn’t long before you find yourself spending over your budget; it’s hard not to when yeonjun is constantly egging you to buy something you really want. “c’mon, y/n,” he whines as you put back another cute button-down on the rack. “you deserve it! you can wear it to work for the next phase of your project!”
he giggles when he sees your eyes light up at his words. “we do have another presentation for it,” you muse.
still, you draw the line when you spot an elegant tan jacket worn by one of the storefront mannequins. you stare at it longingly as if you’ve found your soulmate, and yeonjun sweet-talks you into entering the shop and trying it on. but when you see the hefty price tag on it, you sigh.
“i can’t justify this, jjun…”
“but you look great in it! and you want it so much. you’ll feel worse if you don’t get it.”
“maybe…” you glance down at the shopping bags in your hand. “i dunno, i’ve spent so much already.”
you sigh in defeat and turn back to the store exit before you can second-guess yourself. yeonjun doesn’t follow immediately, but instead watches you go as he lingers a bit longer.
later that day, the two of you sort through all the things you bought (mostly clothes and accessories, but also a vinyl for yeonjun and a novel for yourself) in between giggles and wide eyes and a shower of compliments. yeonjun puts on a completely new outfit for you and struts down his apartment like a runway model, and he pulls you up from the floor to do the same. soon you’re laughing and clapping at each other’s performances, and yeonjun even whips out his phone to take photos of each other’s best looks.
as you rummage through your haul for one more outfit to assemble, your eyes land on a familiar spot of tan fabric. your mouth falls open when you pull it out and see that jacket — the one you’re pretty sure you didn’t buy. you glance up at yeonjun and he licks his lips before forming a mischievous grin.
“jjun, is this...”
“it’s yours.”
“you didn’t have to一”
“i saw the way you were looking at it, y/n. i just had to get it for you. c’mon, put it on.”
hesitantly, you take off the jacket you’re already wearing and put on the new one. it fits perfectly, just a little loose to let air flow in, and you love how it frames your figure. yeonjun is still smiling at you, but it’s a different smile. he looks at you as if you’ve transformed in front of him.
“you look really pretty,” he says. “let me take a few pics, okay?”
he snaps a few photos of you and you pose for the camera, and a comforting warmth settles over you. if this happened a few months earlier, you would have blushed and your heart would be doing somersaults, but now all you feel is a light flutter. everything feels fit in, like the final piece of a puzzle slotting into place.
you lock eyes with yeonjun as he takes the last photo and puts his phone away. as you whisper “thank you” to him, the gleam in his eyes is reflected in your own. there it is, that indecipherable look of his that makes you feel warm.
you still love him 一 there’s a part of you that still knows that. but over the last month and a half you’ve simply learned to live with your feelings, letting them fill you with lightness for a few moments and then letting them go. feelings or not, you’re just glad to have yeonjun in your life again. even as a friend, his presence is a soothing balm against the stresses of life.
一
months later, yeonjun is sprawled on your couch again, his head on your shoulder as you scroll through your list of rom-coms on your laptop. at one point the two of you resumed your pho and rom-com nights, and you’re glad for it; few things give you as much comfort after a long week of work.
after scrolling back and forth a few times, you pause on the same movie you’ve always watched together and give him a quick look. he simply smiles.
“don’t you get sick of this one?” you ask.
“not really, the ending always feels nice. are you… tired of it?”
“no no, i— i was worried that you’re tired of it.”
“me? never.”
“perfect, ‘cause i’m not either.” you give him a knowing grin and press play.
at this point you both know this movie so well that you recite along to every line. you do the female lead’s lines, yeonjun does the male lead’s, and you even sing along to the soundtrack. yeonjun stretches out on your couch even more, his head ending up in your lap, and in the movie’s quiet moments you find yourself playing with his hair. when the big confession happens you can feel him holding his breath and then releasing it in a laugh when the two leads finally kiss.
the credits roll and he glances up at you, smiling in satisfaction. you smile too and hum along to the end credits song. as the movie ends, you let yourself bask in it: you stretch out your arms, yeonjun sits up to lean on your shoulder again, and you lay your head atop his. the two of you remain like that for a while, sitting in comfortable silence.
“don’t you ever get jealous of them?” you ask.
you feel his head shake a bit as he chuckles. “i hate to admit it, but yeah. rom-coms always make getting together look so... fun.”
“right? i wish my life was like that.”
“god, me too.”
“i swear, it drives me insane,” you huff. “every time i watch this i want to start dating again or something.”
a few more moments of silence. yeonjun lets out a soft exhale and you feel his body grow tense. the air in your apartment seems stuffier.
“speaking of which, i have to tell you something.”
“me...?”
you’ve never heard yeonjun sound so solemn. his head weighs down on your shoulder. “y’know, i’ve been uh... thinking of dating again.”
“oh... where are you dating this time? did beomgyu set you up again?”
he shakes his head, looks up at you for a split second, then looks down at his hands. you see the tips of his ears turn pink.
“actually, i... i have someone mind. someone i want to ask out, i mean.”
with those words the feelings you’ve brushed aside for so long come back in full force. your heart beats so hard it feels like it’s slamming into your chest. when you speak, your voice shakes.
“oh... who’s the lucky one?”
“i-i’ve known her for a while. she’s sweet and fun to be around... we’ve been hanging out a lot more often these last few months. we get along really well, at least i think we do...”
“sounds like you have chemistry with this special girl,” you say, the words heavy on your tongue. the hammering of your heart floods your ears. “so what’s stopping you from asking her out?”
yeonjun sits up to face you fully. you sense the effort it takes for him to look at you 一 has he ever been like this around you before? 一 and you reach for his hands. they’re trembling, and his ears go from pink to red.
“a long time ago,” he starts, voice shaking, “i kissed her. i kissed her after my last breakup. and i wasn’t thinking straight, i was just so lonely that i wanted to be loved again 一 but i can’t do that to yo— to her, she’s one of my best friends, i don’t want yo— her to be a rebound 一 but then you said we could start over so we did and i dunno, at one point i started liking you, i fell so hard i don’t know wh一”
you interrupt him with a kiss, your lips gentle on his. you feel him kissing you back, his movements gentle as his hand comes up to hold your head in place. you find yourself pressed against him and he’s even warmer than you remember, warmer than those dreams you had so many months ago.
when you break apart, his eyes are glazed over in a look of pure admiration.
“y/n...”
“jjun, i...” heat spreads across your face. “i’ve loved you for years.”
“then why didn’t you say anything?”
“how could i? what if you didn’t feel that way and it ruined our friendship? and with all the other guys too?” your heart is still beating fast but you let out the words while your boldness still has a hold on you. “and then you dated hana and i cried but i wanted you to be happy 一 then you broke up and you kissed me and i liked it, and i hated myself for liking it because you were 一”
yeonjun pulls you into him, arms encircling you, and as you keep rambling into his chest he soothes you with one hand combing through your hair. his other arm grips you firmly, and your own arms find a firm hold around his neck.
“i love you too, y/n,” he whispers into your hair before leaving a kiss there. “it’s okay.”
“i love you, so much...”
he pulls apart to get a good look at your face. as he sees a few tears start to roll down your cheeks, he brushes them aside with his thumb.
“so this girl,” he says, affection lacing his words, “after we kissed, she said we could start over. and we did. and i’m really glad we did, because i fell for h一 for you so hard.”
you lean your head forward so that your forehead touches his. “really?”
“really. and i...”
“do you want to kiss her again?”
yeonjun’s breath hitches and his eyes meet yours. there it is 一 that same look of his that makes you feel light. the one that, you realize, makes you feel loved.
“can i?”
“please,” you whisper.
he closes the gap between your lips and his, and this time you feel only relief and bliss.
the fact that Israel can precisely target ONE apartment in an entire residential block in BEIRUT to kill two hamas leaders, proves once again that they CHOSE to carpet-bomb Gaza and murder 31.000 Palestinians to "defend themselves" against Hamas. Israel CHOSE to kill civilians, they CHOSE to bomb every hospital, every school, every refugee camp, every residential block. israel does NOTHING to spare the lives of palestinians, they want to thin out the population of gaza so they'd be able to settle their citizens there.
this is a genocide it's an ethnical cleansing PLEASE WAKE UP don't stop talking about Palestine it is not a trend, people are still dying, Israel has no plan to stop if WE don't force it to, through public pressure and protesting and boycotting. it's the least we can do.
| genre: smau + written oneshot, fluff, romance, best friends to lovers
| warnings: kai almost crying, lmk if theres other things i should add pls !!
| w.c: 1.6k
reblogs are highly appreciated !! :33
kai plopped down on the couch, sighing loudly and putting his head in both his hands, getting his friends attention. “what happened with y/n this time?” soobin questioned him, knowing it was about you. “she has a new crush..” kai whined sadly. kai has had the biggest crush on you ever since you were both in middle school, but you were his best friend and he didn’t want to ruin your guys friendship.
“who is it?” taehyun curiously asked. “i don’t know, she didn’t tell me” he leaned back on the couch and ran his fingers through his hair. taehyun sat closer to him and patted his shoulder, comforting him. “maybe it’s you” beomgyu said, trying to give him some hope. “are you crazy? it’s obviously not me! she was ranting to me about this other guy for so long.” he felt like crying due to frustration, but he held it in knowing his friends would tease him.
“maybe you should ask her to hangout, she might forget about that dude” yeonjun suggests. “no.. i can’t, i’m too nervous” kai mumbles, putting his head in both of his hands again. “why don’t we all have a hangout with y/n at the park nearby? so you won’t be nervous and you can talk to her.” soobin says shaking kai’s arm making his hands reveal his face, while the other members agree to soobin’s idea. kai stays silent. “come on kaii! it’s a good idea” soobin persuades him to agree. “fine” he sighs, pulling his phone out of his pocket “i’ll ask her”.
next day
it’s 12:50 pm, you’re getting ready for the hangout, picking your outfit, doing your makeup and hair. when you finished, you waited for kai to pick you up. he ended up arriving at your house at 1:30 pm. he knocked on your door, making you jump, grabbing your purse and quickly opening the door. kai smiled brightly at the sight of you, “hi kai!” you look up and smile back at him, “hi y/n! you ready?” he offers his hand out to you, “yep!” you nod putting your hand in his, while he leads you to his car.
you both start having conversations, making jokes and laughing while on the way to the park to meet the other 4. after arriving, you find the others taking pictures of eachother and the scenery around them. “hey y/n” they all greet you with a smile and you greeting them back. “what should we do first?” yeonjun asks. “ooh! let’s go to the swings there” kai says while pointing to the empty playground. they all agree and start heading towards the playground, they ended up staying there for 3 hours, eating snacks and playing games together like little kids.
while you were talking with beomgyu, taehyun tapped kai’s shoulder and whispered to him “hey, go pick some flowers over there and give them to y/n” taehyun pointed to the small patch of grass with many different flowers, kai looked in the direction taehyun was pointing to and he looked for the perfect flowers to give you, he ended up picking white tulips that he found in the corner of the grass patch, which you had told him were your favorites since you were a kid. he picked up three of them, holding them with a fist, nervous to give them to you.
it was already sunset, the beautiful golden sun rays shining right on you, he was mesmerized by you, he waited until you were done talking with beomgyu to give you the flowers he found. beomgyu left the swing next to you after awhile, kai hid the tulips behind his back and slowly went up to you, sitting down on the swing beomgyu previously was on. “hi y/n” he said with a smile “i have something for you” he said with a cute smirk on his face, “really, what is it?” you said excitedly with a glow in your eyes, “close your eyes and hold out both of your hands”, you did so and he put the white tulips in your hands, “you can open them now!”. you opened your eyes and looked down on your hands to see what he put, you gasped with excitement and smiled at him “these are my favorite! how did you know?” you asked him, “you told me a long time ago” he laughed at how cute you were, “you still remembered?” you asked him with a soft tone, feeling important and flattered that he still remembered after such a long time, “of course i did” he said watching you with a smile as you admire how pretty the flowers are. you get off the swing to hug him tightly while thanking him and he pats the back of your head. after that, you all decide to leave the playground and walk along the park track.
the track was quite small, having to walk behind and infront of some of the others. you were in the front, walking next to soobin, yeonjun and beomgyu walking in the middle, and taehyun and kai in the back. “did you give y/n the flowers?” taehyun whispered to kai. he nodded “she really liked it” he was smiling while remembering the sweet moment that happened between you two a few minutes ago, but his smile turning into a pout remembering that you like someone else. taehyun noticed him, “you should just tell her how you feel, it’s better than feeling like this forever and not moving on” he said. kai didn’t want to, but he knew that taehyun was right and he should confess to you soon.
you guys end up stopping at a large grass field, with flowers everywhere. there was a beautiful fountain off to the side of the field. the fountain was made out of white pearly stone with vines wrapping around it, white and pink tulips everywhere along the bottom of the fountain, creating a circle shape around the structure. it was the prettiest thing you’ve ever seen. the others were taking pictures of the field, so you ran off to the fountain, admiring it and taking out your phone to take pictures of it.
while you were about to snap another picture of the fountain, you felt someone behind you, startling you, you turn around, it was kai. you accidentally bumped into him, “oh my god you scared me” you sighed while your hand was on your chest, “oh sorry” kai laughed. it was just you two, in front of the fountain. “um.. can i tell you something” kai said nervously, “sure what is it?” you asked curiously, wanting to know why he looked a little scared. “i know this might change our friendship a little bit… i really hope it won’t but…. i like you y/n… alot actually.. i’ve liked you for awhile now” he said in a low mumbly voice. you were surprised, confused, flustered, happy, you didn’t know which one. “i know you don’t feel the same and i know you like another guy and that’s okay but i just hope that your happ-“ you cut him off with a small kiss. “huh..” he looks even more nervous than before. “i like you too kai” you smile up at him. “b-but i thought you like someone else.. you were talking about another guy to me for almost an hour” he was so confused, making you laugh a little. “that guy was you, silly.” you poke his chest. he grew even more red every second, he doesn’t even know what to say.
“will you be my girlfriend?” he asks you, “of course!” you respond excitedly, jumping into his arms and giving him a big hug. he kisses your cheek a few times before walking back to the others while holding hands. they all look at you both, confused on why you both are so giggly and red. “what happened? where have you guys been?” beomgyu asks. you and kai just stare, brightly smiling at eachother, kai tucks a strand of hair behind your ear and kisses the top of your head. “yah!! i told you the guy was you!!” beomgyu screams at kai, making him laugh.
kai drives you back home, holding hands the whole car ride. he opens the car door for you when you arrive at your house, taking your hand in his as you get out, “why thank you” you smile at him, “anything for you my love”.
you hug him before going inside, he hugs you back tighter, not wanting you to leave, “i’ll call or text you later, kai” you reassure him, “okay” he softly says as he pulls away from the hug to let you go inside. you were walking towards the front door but stopping right after kai said “wait, y/n!” you turned around and kai went up to you, held your face and gave you a longgg kiss, you ran your fingers through his fluffy hair and kissed him back, he pulls away and whispers in the crook of your neck “i love you, y/n”, “i love you too, kai” you both smile at each other when he gets in his car and he drives away.
a/n: help im sorry this isnt that good 😭😭 i could’ve done better but this was rushed 💔
synopsis - he was her muse, she was his solace, however what if his emotions got to him for the worst to happen?
-> inspired by the webtoon seasons of blossom, hamin's flower, a bit of dongchae's flower too if you squint :)
-> muse! beomgyu x artist! reader
-> right person not enough time, highschool au, strangers to lovers, fluff, angst with happy ending, secret relationship
-> note! rlly important,, attempted suicide, abusive parents and sh mentions so pls scroll away if youre uncomfortable. slightly ooc beomgyu. i cried at hamin's flower, i love this webtoon sm. also this is going to be more lengthier compared to my other oneshots so enjoy!!
he was rather popular among the cohort, everyone liked him. he was attractive, smart, and had an overall fun personality. everyone knew who beomgyu was, girls swooning over him, confessing their love for him. guys always hanging around him, wanting to have a chat with him every now and then. the whole school knew how cool he was, how high his reputation was, everyone liked him, there was nothing to dislike about beomgyu. that's how you know him even if you guys weren't from the same class.
you, on the other hand, were quiet, barely interacted with the people around you. you'd always stay out of drama in order to protect yourself. during breaks and lunch, you always saw yourself finding solace in the art room, chewing down on your premade lunch while painting whatever was on your mind.
first encounter ༘⋆✿
this day in particular, was one where it basically changed your life. as you mixed the paints on your palette to get a shade of your liking, the door suddenly opened. numerous thoughts rushed through your mind, did someone finally find out your hiding spot? is a teacher going to scold you for using the art room? you bit your lip, thinking of the multiple possibilities that may occur. the sound of the sliding door closing made you peek your eyes out to assess the situation, only to realise that beomgyu, the one everyone liked, was in the same room as you.
"finally, some peace, these people can't seem to stop following me around jeez." beomgyu scoffed in annoyance, grabbing the seat closest to him, plopping down on it exhaustedly. you peered at beomgyu with confusion, he doesn't seem to notice your presence just yet. you continued to hide yourself, watching him warily while he continued to grumble to himself.
just to your luck, your leg accidentally kicked the easle, causing it to drop. you mentally cursed to yourself trying to prevent the canvas from falling on the ground. beomgyu heard the chaos happening on your end, and immediately turned his head over to find the source of loud sound, only the find you panicking over the fact that you got found out.
"how long have you been in here?" beomgyu interrogated you as if you were a wanted criminal. nothing could come out of your mouth, you looked like a deer caught in headlights. beomgyu chuckled to himself, moving towards you, taking a seat beside you.
"i'm beomgyu, you?" he placed a hand out infront of you, wanting to shake your hand. you glanced at his hand, then his face, still skeptical, what if he is luring you into a trap to get caught by the teachers. unbelievable!
"i'm yn.." you mumbled, loud enough to be heard by beomgyu, taking him hand in yours, giving it a nice, and firm shake. the awkward tension filled up the atmosphere, beomgyu scratched his cheek, slightly nervous about the silence between the two of you. you sat there, eating onigiri as if he wasn't there, continuing to paint your artwork. beomgyu stared at the way you carried the brush, with each stroke, a mesmerising work of art unfolded infront of beomgyu.
"you stay here during your spare time?" beomgyu asked, sipping on the extra pack of milk he was carrying in his bag earlier. you hummed in response, "yea, this is my place to enjoy the peace and quiet." a bit of sarcasm directed towards beomgyu for interrupting your tranquility. beomgyu remained silent for a while, finishing his milk packet, placing it on one of the tables around the both of you.
"the teachers allow you in here?" beomgyu continued questioning you, he found you quite interesting for not fawning over him, and asking him stupid questions like what everyone else does. he felt safe around you despite knowing you for just a few minutes. "only my art teacher, he knows how much i enjoy drawing, so he gave me the keys to this room. only if i promised not to get caught by any teacher or student. but, you suddenly came in here, man i should have locked the door." you grumbled the last part out, in slight bitterness. however you didn't really ming beomgyu's presence as long as he doesn't go snitching on you, you were fine with it.
"then you, why did you suddenly barge in here without a warning?" it was your turn to interrogate him, usually no one found interest in the art room, so you found it suspicious. beomgyu looked nervous, was he really about to tell a girl he just got to know his secret. he pressed his lips together, forming something similar to a straight line, still hesitant. you noticed his silence, and was about to reassure him that you weren't forcing him to tell you.
"it's just that my supposed friends are practically assholes who just want popularity. i just want to get away from them." beomgyu sighed, his eyes flickering to whatever's interesting outside the window. "promise me that you tell anyone about my secret or i'll complain to the school about your special treatment in the art room." beomgyu warned, turning to face you to show how serious he was with this.
"ok, ok promise." you giggled, finding his serious look funny. beomgyu's eyebrows furrowed, "why are you laughing." you covered your mouth, preventing yourself from giggling any further.
"nothing, just found it funny." you replied, your focus going back to your uncompleted canvas. beomgyu pouted, resting cheek on the table infront of him as he continued to watch you paint the background of your artwork. "oh! right, can you model for me? i really need a reference for this piece.. i need to work on my realism, please." you pleaded beomgyu. beomgyu's eyes narrowed, reluctant to do your request, however he found himself shifting his seat to face your direction. strange. whenever his friends asked him to do something, he'd normally refuse, however he was comfortable with your requests. how odd.
"is this ok?" he asked, he rested his cheek on the palm of his hand, looking at you like a puppy wandering on the streets. you gave him a thumbs up before turning your attention back to your canvas, picking up the pencil from the table beside you. your head would occassionally pop up from the side of your canvas, peering at beomgyu's facial features, taking them in while your hands does the wonders of sketching out his pretty features. beomgyu's facial structure was perfect, paired with his soft fluffy brown hair resting neatly above his eyes. you could tell that he was growing out his hair especially with the ends of his hair touching the back of the collar of his uniform.
beomgyu watched you squint your eyes with pure concentration whenever you'd look at his features and back at your canvas to make sure they matched. he noticed the way your tongue protruding from your lips slightly, your eyes basically fired up with determination to get the details correct. he felt himself smile to himself, watching your every move.
"tell me about yourself, beomgyu. i don't want to sketch in plain silence." you suddenly requested, beomgyu was taken aback, this was the first time someone actually wanted to understand and know him as a person, and not just for his looks and academics. beomgyu licked his dry lips before opening his mouth, maybe he could trust you with this information, "hmm, you know, even if this is the first time i've ever met you. i feel like i can just be myself around you. for the first time, i don't need to have a fake persona to make a person understand me."
you felt your mouth go dry, he left you tongue tied, you didn't expect him to say something like that, you felt your heart rate accelerating– he made you feel special, important. "wow.. i didn't take you as a two-faced person." you joked with him, beomgyu sneered at your remark, feeling the tips of his ears turn red, well you weren't particularly wrong..
"how long do we have left." you asked, rushing your final detail of the sketch. beomgyu switched on his phone, flipping the screen around to show you. 5 minutes left, wow that was quick. you turned the easle towards beomgyu, showing your masterpiece.
"how is it?" you inquired proudly, you were nervous about the sudden silence coming from beomgyu's end. you slowly opened your eyes to see him taking a picture of your artwork, your eyes widened, "hey, it's not even done. don't take a picture just yet." however, beomgyu smirked at you, showing signs of not wanting to delete the picture. he slowly backed up towards the door, pausing as you looked at him in confusion.
"remember our promise ok?" beomgyu reminded, sticking out his pinky, you looked up at him, cocking your eyebrow at him, before intertwining your pinkies to lock the promise. beomgyu smiled at your gesture, "i'll see you soon." waving at you one last time before heading out of the art room. you stared at the shut door, still puzzled from what just occurred. you hurriedly packed your things before leaving the art room to go for your next class.
subsequent meetings ༘⋆✿
the door slid open again, you looked up in curiousity, only to be puzzled to see beomgyu standing there, quietly shutting the door. "you're here again?" you sighed, once again your peace was disrupted. beomgyu laughed, "can't i come here to enjoy the peace as well?" you grimaced at him, turning your head back to the canvas that was on the table, struggling to place it properly on the easle. beomgyu quickly stood behind you, leaning down to help you fix it. you felt your breath hitch, you could feel how close he was to you as he positioned the canvas perfectly for you. beomgyu took a seat beside you, his head on the table, turned towards your direction, watching you squeeze each of your desired coloured paints onto the palette.
"do you not have any other friends?, do you, well.. get outcasted or something? should i help you?" beomgyu randomly muttered out, you felt yourself pause, your head turning to face him, "what do you mean?" completely confused about what he's saying, the back of your neck feeling warm. is he assuming that you have no friends since you always hang around the art room.. beomgyu shrugged his shoulder, staring off into the distance. to beomgyu, he envied you, you get to enjoy your own solitude in the art room, away from the loud chaos happening in the main areas of the school. he's always surrounded by people, constantly blabbering in his ears about different topics that he isn't interested in, he often had to tune them out, or even cut them off to have some silence. even at home, he can't have a place where he could be alone and happy. his parents are constantly shouting, yelling at him to do better. pressurising him to constantly get good grades for every single test, even one mistake makes them go ballistic.
"i did have a friend, but she moved away 2 weeks later. i don't really socialise with the people in my class, so.." you hesitated to continue, not knowing how to complete your sentence. beomgyu smiled at you with adoration, maybe, just maybe he can find some solace within you. whenever you were painting, or just doing anything related to art, you'd look serene. beomgyu found you calming, only you could calm his nerves down that easily.
"cute." beomgyu uttered out, it slipped out of his mouth. you were stunned, a soft 'huh' left your mouth. confused, yet flustered at the same time, your cheeks warmed up at the sudden compliment. beomgyu gave you a boyish grin, straightening his back, stretching his tense muscles at the same time.
"hm, how about this, we make this our meeting place, but outside of here, pretend like we don't know each other. i don't want you to get unnecessary attention from my 'friends'." beomgyu offered, his request was odd. however, you still accepted it, you somehow enjoyed his presence around you. you've only known him for a while, but how does one already break down your walls that easily?
"that's a deal then." beomgyu smirked at you, his pinky intertwining with yours again, making another promise with you. "i'll see you around yn!" waving goodbye to you with a big smile on his face, heading out of the art room. you were slightly touched with how much he tried to create a bond with you, it was cute of him, maybe you'd actually look forward to lunch time now.
everyday, without a fail, beomgyu would enter the art room, closing the door immediately to not attract any suspicion. everyday, he entered the room, the relationship between both of you blossomed. you found yourself growly more fond of him. he felt the same way, he was drawn to you in some way or another, you weren't like the other people in school who would always stick their noses into other people's business. he knew that he could allow you into his heart. he knew that maybe it's possible to try something new with you. you had mini art lessons for beomgyu, you noticed his special talent for art, not only did was he a model student, he could draw well too, that pulled your heart strings.
in the art room, from teaching him how to paint a scenary, to conversations about each other's personal life. leaning on the edge of a table, beomgyu would subconsciously lace his fingers with yours, his head laying on your shoulder, telling you about how tiring it was to deal with his fake friends. you could only try your best to comfort him, since you didn't know exactly how he felt. his thumb would occassionally rub your knuckles, making your heart race.
despite all these secret interactions you two have, you would walk past beomgyu, not initiating any conversation with him, only glancing up at him, he would do the same, locking eyes with you, his hands intentionally rubbing past yours before walking away with his group of friends. thus, you decided to tone down your overwhelming feelings for beomgyu in order not to get too affected by it. therefore, when you saw beomgyu sitting in the art room, a tear dripping down his face, you were concerned, worried, you didn't really know what to do. so the best thing you did was pretend like you didn't notice beomgyu crying.
beomgyu noticed how flustered you were, a light-hearted giggle came out of his mouth, "i'm fine, so don't go anywhere. just stay here." upon his request, you sat infront of him, your eyes filled with concern. "why were you crying?" you asked, beomgyu looked out of the window, the afternoon glow luminating his face, his tear stained cheeks now more obvious, his damp eyelashes fluttering prettily. he was heaven-sent.
"summer break's coming, that means i'll have to attend summer school, and not be allowed to use the art room.." trailing off his words, "i also like watching you draw, so i guess that contributes to the factor." beomgyu confessed. your hands were clammy, did you hear that correctly? you felt yourself blush, cheeks warming up.
"how about during summer break you come with me to the art academy i attended for a tour?" you invited. beomgyu immediately turned to face you, the tip of his ears turning red, you practically asked him out. "sure.." he agreed, his hands quickly grabbing his phone from his pocket, typing in something quickly. he showed you his screen, contactlist. oh, he wanted your number. you took his phone from his, placing it on your lap before passing your own device to him, wanting him to give you his contact as well. both of you typed in your numbers in each other's phone before returning it back.
"i'll text you the date?" you say, tilting your head slightly. beomgyu uttered a quick, 'ok', coming down from the shelf he was conveniently sitting on. he bidded you goodbye, heading for his next, leaving you alone with your own thoughts. you turned on your phone, seeing the contact name, 'beomgyu :D' appearing on the notification board. 'i'll see you on the tour day itself :)' without knowing, you smiled to yourself, replying to his message while walking towards your classroom.
rain ༘⋆✿
maybe it was fate, maybe an invisible string was attached to the both of you to find each other. it has been a while since the day you two went out for the tour around your art academy, you've introduced him to the art studio you always go to after school. you and beomgyu made it your second hangout spot, away from everyone, only you, him, and your art director, but that didn't really matter. you two were closer than ever, telling each other about your secrets, ranting to each other about everything, basically attached by the hip.
school started again after the long summer break, the both of you went back to pretending like you didn't know about each other's existence. you ended classes earlier than him, since you were in the art stream. beomgyu on the other hand, he had lessons all the way till 4, as he was in the top class, which has more subjects compared to a normal senior year class, even if he wanted to skip lessons to spend more time with you, he can't, his parents were another issue. if his parents found out that he pulled out of his cram school, and went to your art studio with the funded money, who knows what would happen to him.
you stood near the entrance of the school's main doors, waiting for him to go to the art studio together, noticing that the sky was overcast, yet there was no wind whatsoever. the humidity and heat was getting to you, tying your hair in hopes of cooling yourself down. suddenly you felt something cold being placed at the back of your neck, you shrieked in fear, only to realise that beomgyu was standing behind you with a chilled can of pocari, placing it on the top of your head, giving it to you.
"sorry to keep you waiting." beomgyu apologised, peeping his head out of the sheltered doorway to check the weather, it was going to rain. he turned to you as you chugged down the can of pocari as if it was your last drink.
"oh? you tied your hair, huh? didn't you let it loose just now?" his eyes squinting at you, you felt flustered under his gaze, "i was waiting for you, and it was really humid, so i tied my hair!" you retorted, your lips forming into a pout. "hmm, for sure. you look cuter with your hair tied up anyways." beomgyu teased, his smirk rubbing you off. you smacked his shoulder, while he laughed at you.
just a few moments after, the sky was completely dark, droplets of rain pouring down from the sky immediately. you looked out at the sky, slightly happy about the sudden downpour, you loved the rain, it was relaxing. just listening to the sounds of rain droplets falling and hitting the concrete floor was soothing to you.
"the rain makes the summer air so much more suffocating." beomgyu grumbled beside you, about to grab his umbrella, however you stopped him. "let's go! this is the best way to feel freedom." you giggled, holding beomgyu's hand to pull him out into the rain. your bright, radiant smile made beomgyu flush, he usually hated the rain, let alone play in it, but it was different when it was with you.
"if you're going to grab onto my hand, at least do it properly." beomgyu mumbled, his fingers making it's way to intertwine with yours. "even so, this is more fun than i thought." beomgyu admitted, you beamed even more after hearing that, you hands squeezing his as you jumped into puddles, running around in the rain with him. after that fun, eventful journey, you two finally arrived at the art studio, greeting your art director with both your hairs' dripping, clothes stuck to your skin.
"oh dear! come, take some of my clothes, i'll go wash and dry these for you." the art director sighed, tossing her clothes onto the couch for you and beomgyu to change into. you burst out in laughter when you saw beomgyu, sitting on the couch, waiting for you, the clothes were too small for him. he glared at you, "shut up, sit here with me." beomgyu grumbled, patting the seat next to him, you obediently went beside him. the both of you shared the blanket, warming yourselves up.
"hmm, you know, whenever i'm with you, i get more talkative. usually i'm uncomfortable with such things, but why is it ok when i'm with you?" beomgyu said, leaning his head to his hand, looking straight into your eyes.
"oh, i hear a lot from my friends that i seem harmless." you joked, laughing to yourself, beomgyu smiled along with you, his eyes softened as he admired your pretty smile, and rosy cheeks.
"i think i know what they mean. but it's more like..." beomgyu trailed, trying to find a word to describe it.
"what? you're gonna tease me again, aren't you?" you scoffed, knowing that he loves joking around with you, he enjoyed looking at your angry look, it was cute.
"you're lovable?" your eyes widened in confusion, your cheeks flushing to a light hue a red, nothing came out of your mouth, you were speechless. beomgyu noticed your reaction, pink dusting his cheeks, the tip of his ears turning red. you laughed at him, pointing out how flustered he was.
"you make me like this yn." beomgyu pulled on his ears, in attempt to hide them, finally lifting his head up from the palm of his hand to look at your better. he inched closer to you, faces just centimeters away from one another, his mind clouded with thoughts of you, your lips, everything about you, "tell me if you hate it ok?" asking for consent.
"i don't.. hate it." you reassured him. beomgyu's lips tugged upwards before closing the gap between the two of you. you tasted like vanilla, probably from the lipbalm you were before school, he wanted more but was afriad that you would feel uncomfortable, pulling away after awhile. the kiss was short but pure. a small, 'ah' coming out of your mouth, feeling slightly disappointed that it ended.
beomgyu leaned towards you, whispering into your ear, "by the way, that was my first kiss." hearing that shocked you, he has never kissed anyone before? you were his first. "me too.." you trailed off, nervously glancing around the art studio. "it was pretty obvious." beomgyu chuckled as you turned your head towards him, your cheeks burning further, "huh how!? what do you m-"
"i'm back kids!" the art director interrupted your sentence, holding onto a basket with your uniforms. you and beomgyu turned towards her with red faces, she looked shocked and apologised, leaving your uniforms on the counter before continuing to mind her own business. the two of you turned back to each other and giggled. maybe beomgyu would start liking the rain that he had always hated.
radiant ༘⋆✿
"is everyone clear on this? this is how your art projects will be evaluated this semester." everybody groaned, the grading system was even more strict than usual. "oh right, i heard that your class chose face painting for this year's school festival. yn you're good at drawing, so you can help the others.." everyone turned to you while you blinked open your eyes, you were dead asleep. you didn't hear anything you teacher just said. your classmates laughed as your tablemate filled you in on what was happening, you came to your senses and just nodded in agreement to what your teacher said.
"perfect, class is dismissed now." you heaved a sigh of relief, saying a quick goodbye to your classmates, making your way to the art room. while walking up the flight of stairs, you overheard a group of people talking bad about beomgyu, they obviously couldn't tell that their volume was loud enough for people to eavesdrop on them. you felt a familiar presence creeping up behind you, you turned around, looking at beomgyu with concern, is this what he goes through all the time? beomgyu placed a finger on his lips, brushing past you as he made his way towards the group.
your eyes lingered on beomgyu's silhouette, worry crashes over. is he really ok with his friends talking shit about him behind his back.. your eyebrows knitted together, pulling your phone out of your skirt pocket as soon as you entered the art room.
yn★: are you ok?
beom:> : yea don't worry about me.
im almost there, wait for me yeah? read
upon hearing the door shut behind you, your head snapped towards the direction. beomgyu gave you the same old carefree smile he'd always wear on his face as if nothing happened. you walked towards him, tugging him into a hug. beomgyu was stiff but slowly melted under your touch, using his height to his advantage, he placed his chin atop of your head, his hands rubbing your back, consolling you.
"yn, you don't need to worry about me too much 'kay?" his gentle voice reassured you. maybe he was too used to it. "but if it bothers you too much, you can tell me." your head tilted up, doe eyes looking up at him. beomgyu nodded to your request, patting your head as he pulled away, how could he say no?
"right, my class is doing face painting for this years festival, and i kinda got forced into it.. so if you can, please visit us." you exclaimed, an excited smile appearing on your face. beomgyu's eyes softened, perhaps it was finally time for you to be under the limelight.
weeks flew by quickly, the school's festival was finally here. your class was bustling, each and every one of you scrambled around your class, setting up the props, and rearranging the tables. you on the other hand, was dragging a heavy bag of washable facepaints and brushes up to your class, your teacher must really enjoywatching you suffer. you were that your legs were going to fumble when you entered the class, beads of sweat trickling dowm your forehead as if you ran a marathon.
"wow, she really gave us a lot of materials, thanks for bringing them up yn!" your classmate patted your back, rummaging through the variety of brushes and paints, picking each different one up. you smiled at them, giving them a quick thumbs up, can they not tell that you basically went through hell bringing these up the stairs, this was even worse than deadlifting at a gym.
"yn! come here, help us paint our faces first before everyone else comes! we wanna be the first ones to experience your facepainting." your friend shouted for you, you went to where they were, sitting down on where you were supposedly stationed at. you carefully painted each of their requests right on their cheekbone, under their eyes. all of your classmates were amazed at your skill, you were able to draw from scratch, something they can't do.
"now do yours!" your classmate exclaimed, her phone camera placed infront of your, as if it was a mirror. you gave it some thought, finally deciding to draw a bear on your cheek, beomgyu's favourite animal, it even looks like him. you smiled to yourself, proud of your final work. you turned your cheek towards your classmates, showing it off, everyone gaped in astonishment, some giving you a thumbs up.
"ok guys, sorry to ruin your fun, but people are about to start coming here, so please get ready." your teacher coughed out to gain your attention, everyone quickly went to their station, a few grabbing the predecorated board to walk around the school to promote your class's activity. you rest your head on the palm of your hand, waiting for the students to arrive at at your classroom. multiple students came rushing in, they were excited to have their faces painted, especially by one of the best artists in the school. multiple requests were shouted at you as you tried calming them down, "one by one please.." you felt small, but you were happy that people were finally recognising your work and appreciating you as a person.
"you seriously want to do face painting?" a voice echoed through the hallways, only to be shushed by his group of friends. you recognised the brown messy hair, along with his converse shoes almost immediately. beomgyu came to see you, you smiled to yourself, your eyes darted back to the student you were still working on as he made his way towards you, his friends following behind him like minions.
"it's so cute, thank you so much yn!" the girl quickly thanked, her eyes sparkling with pure joy, admiring the art you drew on her cheek. your lips curved upwards, proud of yourself. without even realising, beomgyu had already sat infront of you, waiting for you to speak. you cleared your throat, out of pure anxiousness. "what design would you like to have?" he pondered to himself, humming while tapping his chin, "a hamster." your heart skipped a beat, it was one of your favourite pets, he even told you that you looked like a hamster before. he definitely got the inspiration from the bear on your cheek.
you dipped your paintbrush into the white paint before carefully drawing out the hamster you envisioned in your mind. beomgyu's eyes were closed, however he could feel how close your faces were, his ears turned to a slight pink shade, feeling rather flustered. "done." your soft, tender voice spoke, beomgyu's eyes opened up, staring into the mirror next to him, admiring your work of art. not long after, he got up, bidding you goodbye before leaving with his friends. you called out for the next student, giggling with them, not knowing that beomgyu's gaze was still on you, admiring the way your smile brightened up the entire room, everyone around you laughing away, having a fun time. everyone seemed to enjoy your presence, finally noticing how radiant you can be.
days after the festival, you hung out with a few new friends you made during the festival, gossiping, chatting about boys, the usual teenage stuff. of course you'd go back to the art room to meet beomgyu, however it felt different, you noticed that his usually welcoming, fun aura was replaced with a gloomy one. he tried his best to hide it from you, his signature smile appearing on his face whenever you guys talked, hugged or shared a quick kiss.
one particular evening, you were texting beomgyu like any other regular day, chatting about your day as per usual, a giddy smile stayed on your face.
yn★ : RIGHT IT WAS SO STUPID
beom:> : oh right, i have a request.
yn★ : hold on! my mum is calling for me
beom:> : if i look tired one day, can you drag me out to jump in the rain again? [deleted]
yn★ : im back
what was it that you deleted?
gyu?
hello????
you furrowed your eyebrows, beomgyu wasn't the type to leave you on delivered, this was new. you didn't know how to feel, your fingers moved faster than your mind, you closed the app, turning off your phone. you stared at the ceiling, tears pricking your eyes, is it true, is the '3 month rule' thing your friends talk about true? you sighed, wiping away the fallen teardrops before closing your eyes. maybe sleeping will remove all your problems.
it has been a long time since that happened, you felt like your relationship with beomgyu was going to fall apart, you didn't want that to happen at all, you were worried, he left you on delivered more often, even if he replied you, it was dry. you felt like a wreck. on the other hand, beomgyu felt like he was going back into the slump he was once in before he found you, this time it was worse. the unbelievably high standards his parents were setting for him, along with the physical abuse he had to endure was getting unbearable. in addition to that, beomgyu's parents limited the hours beomgyu could spend on his phone, also banning him from going out after they found out about him sneaking out to the art studio instead of cram school. they were furious, slapping him hard, ripping the drawings beomgyu drew during his freetime, shouting at him. beomgyu was tired, extremely exhausted of everything.
"gyu?" your voice suddenly sounded, the door behind him opened, beomgyu jumped in shock, he didn't expect you to be here so early. you closed the door behind you, maybe it was finally time you talked to him about this. "did you change your number?"
"no."
"was your service cut or something?"
"no."
"then what is it? at first i thought you were just busy but weeks and days turned into months, it is hard to see you in school, let alone contact you! but you said you were afraid of losing me." your words struck beomgyu like an arrow piercing through his heart, the way your voice cracked each time you uttered a word broke him, yet he didn't budge, he deserved it, that's what he felt.
"do you not feel it as well? ever since the festival, we've distanced so much, it's as if we're back to square one, like we don't know each other anymore." your tears were threatening to spill out, hitting beomgyu's chest. you were mad, but you were more upset than angry at beomgyu, what was he hiding from you.
"as we should." beomgyu mutterred out, bringing his hand to cover his face.
"what?" your mouth slightly ajar, you didn't hear that incorrectly right?
"yn, i think it's better if we just stop seeing each other, or maybe just forget about each other." beomgyu admitted, he didn't want this to end, he really didn't but he didn't want you to go through his sufferring, he wants you to have your own life without constantly worrying about him. you moved beomgyu's hand away from his face, only to realise that he was crying too. you were about to say something but the bell rung, signalling that lunch ended.
"let's go to somewhere before people see us here." you said with a hushed tone, leaving the art room, towards the stairwell nearby. beomgyu followed you closely, his lips pressed together, forming a straight line. his mind was in utter chaos right now, he just wanted to make the pain go away. the both of you sat beside each other on the staircase, waiting for everyone to go back to their classes.
"we're going to be late anyways, you can just tell your teacher you were feeling slightly unwell." you advised, beomgyu nodded his head, tilting his head down, his bangs falling over his eyes.
"im quitting the art studio to join the art academy for my entrance exam–" you took a deep breath in, noticing beomgyu's slighty shocked expression before turning away to look out the window, "so, if you want, you can join me too, then we can go to art school together." you tried staying positive, maybe after this, you and beomgyu still had a chance to see each other outside school and maybe even post highschool.
"i'm quitting art. it is just a hobby to me, i dont see any interest in taking art for college. and i.. can't rlly see you making it far with art too.." beomgyu confessed, maybe it was better for you to start hating him, rather than making you dwell over him and his well-being everytime. you looked at beomgyu with pure bitterness, you were speechless, did he really say that to you? you stood up, making beomgyu look up at you with tired eyes.
"at least i don't bottle up my feelings while making it obvious that i'm doing something i hate. you can spend your life giving up on things you like. like art and me. you coward." you grumbled, walking away from beomgyu, leaving him by the stairs. you were pissed, you quickened your pace towards the girls' bathroom, locking yourself up in the cubicle, letting out your pent up feelings. you hated this feeling, it was eating you up, maybe beomgyu had his reasons to push you away like that, but he could have just told you, why was he doing this.
beomgyu stared blankly at where you stood, he ruffled his hair in frustration, he looked down at the ground, "ah.. i really fucked up." he stared at his wrists, the past healed scars fading away, maybe if he started again, would he feel any better? beomgyu smacked his head, trying to wake himself up as he got up to return back to class.
his flower ༘⋆✿
"i think you should take up this challenge, especially since you want to enter one of the top art colleges." you teacher recommended, you took the pamphlet, scanning through the requirements. you gave it some thought, i mean of course you'd join, it'll look good on your portfolio, but whether you should take one for him.
"can i have one more?" you asked, your teacher smiled at you, handing you another piece. you thanked her and left the staff room, slowly walking back to class. you got to your seat, quickly scribbling something down on the post it you had conveniently laying around, before pasting it on the pamphlet, folding it nicely. you rushed out of your class, looking around for something or someone. luckily, you saw one of beomgyu's friend's, soobin, you knew that they were childhood friends so you could trust him with this.
"hey.. uhm, soobin, can you pass this on to beomgyu, don't tell him who it's from though." you whispered loudly, quickly handing him the folded pamphlet. soobin gave you a thumbs up, waving you a quick goodbye as he entered his classroom.
"beomgyu! something for you." soobin called out, to get beomgyu's attention. beomgyu turned to him with curiousity, taking the piece of paper from soobin's grasp. soobin dragged a chair next to him, waiting for beomgyu to read the contents. beomgyu's eyes straight away landed on the post it note that was loosely hanging on the phamplet.
'us going through this challenging period, is proof that we're trying our best to bloom, right?' it read, beomgyu took the paper, writing something down on the post it before sticking it on his journal. soobin looked at him like a meerkat, wondering what beomgyu was doing.
"oh, right, i might bring over some dinner for you later, i'll text you if i can't." soobin reminded, patting beomgyu's shoulder before leaving the classroom. beomgyu sighed, he really didn't want soobin to come over, he stared at his bandaged up wrist, as he layed his head on the table, closing his eyes for a quick nap.
beomgyu was done with everything, he was exhausted physically and mentally, if he couldn't distract himself, his mind would go haywire. this was especially hard since his screentime was only limited to an hour. the previous night, his dad finally came home after a long day of work, the smell of alcohol on his office dress shirt was loud, beomgyu was scared. his dad's footsteps came closer to his door, much to his disappointment, the door flung open.
"i heard you got back your physics paper, show it to me." beomgyu shivered at how menancing his dad sounded, he obeyed and quickly scrambled for his paper. he looked at his score, just an 80%, not perfect enough for his parents. beomgyu passed the papers to his dad, ready for the scolding of his life.
"fucking disappointment, this is what happened when you go to a bloody art studio instead of the cram school i painstakingly pay for." beomgyu's dad shouted, rage boiling throughout his veins, beomgyu's dad inched closer to beomgyu. slap, a loud, quick smack went across beomgyu's face, it was hard, beomgyu's fists trembled in fear, trying to endure the burning pain on his cheek. his dad grabbed a handful of beomgyu's hair, yanking him closer to him. beomgyu whinced in pain, tears threatening to spill out.
"if you don't stop acting like a useless piece of shit, i'll personally send you abroad." beomgyu's dad spat, tossing beomgyu onto the ground before leaving the room, slamming it shut. beomgyu leaned against his bed, staring up at the ceiling, feeling like nothing. how he wished he could text you right now, but either way, he didn't want to distrupt your sleep. beomgyu slowly got up, walking towards his study table, eyeing the sharpener blade he used to use before he was clean. like a paintbrush on a canvas, each stroke was clean, leaving behind a deep red colour each time, it was like his own artwork.
"ah.." beomgyu sighed, a tear falling out of his eye, looking at his wrist. you'd be so disappointed in him if you ever found out. he quickly took the bandage wraps that were in his drawer, wrapping it around his fresh wounds. beomgyu rubbed his eyes, plopping onto his bed, staring at his wallpaper, a picture your took of a cat on his phone, how he wished things would go back to how it used to be.
back to the present, school ended, students rushed out of their classroom, either wanting to hang out with their friends or to go home to rest. beomgyu knew that his father was home, he knew that he'd be back for another beating, he really didn't want to go home. he slowly packed his things, throwing his bag over his shoulder, proceeding towards his lockers. looking up, he saw you, smiling with your new friends, laughing at one another's jokes. as much as he wanted to run towards you, and bring back past memories, he couldn't he can't hurt you anymore.
beomgyu quickly walked past you, making his way back home. you noticed his familiar scent, you turned around to his direction, your smile faltering, you missed him so much, yet you couldn't bring yourself to text him. "yn? are you going to come?" your friend shook you out of your trance. you jolted at the sudden touch, "yea."
"i'm home." beomgyu announced, closing the front door, removing his shoes. he heard the television playing, dim lights, along with the strong smell of cigerattes and alcohol. not again.. beomgyu's eyebrows furrowed, he didn't want to deal with this again.
"choi beomgyu." beomgyu groaned internally at his name being called, his father looked mad, filled with rage, beomgyu knew he was fucked. "what's with your attitude in school now? the teacher called in saying that you've been sleeping in class more recently, is this how you fucking repay me? is this why you wanted to go to this neighbourhood school? to rebel against your parents?" beomgyu's dad continued rambling, moving closer towards beomgyu, his presence was horrifying, beomgyu felt his blood run cold. it all happened in the matter of seconds, beomgyu's face was now burning, he hissed in pain, holding onto his cheek, looking up at his dad who was staring down at him like he was an abandoned dog.
"pathetic. fucking pathetic. i wished i never had a son like you." beomgyu's dad spat, storming out of the house, probably out to go to the neighbourhood bar to party with his middle aged friends. beomgyu flinched when the door slammed shut, he sat on the ground, wiping off the blood on the side of his mouth. the taste of iron disgusted him, he got up onto his feet, walking into his room. he took out the journal he hid from his parents, the journal that he used to write about things he want to say to you. beomgyu flipped to the paragraph he wrote, rereading it, making sure that there were no flaws.
beomgyu laughed to himself, tears spilling out of his eyes, if his dad didn't even want him around, he might as well make that dream a reality. beomgyu wrote out one last line, before running out of the house, towards the apartment buildings nearby the school. the sky was overcast, dark grey clouds covering the sunrays, a few drops of raindrops fell on beomgyu as he brisk walked towards his desired location.
he trudged past the art studio, his eyes flickering into the studio, hoping that you were there, but who was he kidding, you left the studio to go to the art academy. however, the art director noticed him, shouting for him to get inside or he'll get rained on. beomgyu turned around, his look shocked the art director, he looked helpless, beomgyu bowed to the art director, before going off on his own.
"beomgyu! i have my mum's food here for dinner." soobin shouted, leaving the food on the kitchen counter. realising that there was no response, soobin was confused, maybe beomgyu was taking a nap. he entered beomgyu's room quietly, his eyes widening when he realised beomgyu wasn't anywhere to be found. his phone left on the table, the only thing that caught soobin's attention was the open journal left on beomgyu's desk, a long paragraph written on it. soobin read the content within that paragraph, panicking, soobin's mind was racing, 'fuck' repeating in his mind.
the letter read, 'i felt like i dreamt a very sweet, and awfully bitter dream, because the first moment i saw you combined with all the fleeting moments we spent together were too dazzling for me. you were always radiant. i hoped that only i would be the one to see your light. but others soon caught sight of it. and that's around when i realized something, i hadn't known when i'd been in the dark, the existence of my ugly shadow. the closer it got to the light, the thicker it became and the more it clung to me. so, i couldn't help but hide in the darkness again. i knew you would be hurt, but as you said i was a coward. i knew that you'd always stay with me through thick and thin, and that scared me, my problems would ultimately hurt you in the end either way. i knew how it would feel all too well. i was so used to giving up the things i liked that i thought i'd be okay again soon, just like always. i thought that all i had to do was to return to the way things were before i'd met you. that's what i thought, endless waves of self-hatred, a sense of helplessness, emptiness, loss, and absence. longing for the light, i'd already become accustomed to your warmth. but that short time with you had been the only moment I could be completely myself. thank you for being with me during my most radiant moment yn :)'
soobin unlocked beomgyu's phone, luckily he knew his phone password, he found your number, typing it down onto his own phone, dialing the number. soobin grabbed the journal, along with beomgyu's phone, running out of the house. on your end, you were suspicious on why the same number kept calling you, you were annoyed, the weather was perfect for a nap but it was distrupted by an endless string of phonecalls. you picked up your phone, immediately you heard a sigh of relief, along with a shaky panicky voice.
"you're yn right? please can you meet me at the convenience store nearby please, it's really urgent." soobin pleaded, his voice sounded like he was going to breakdown anytime soon. you were worried, what was exactly going on, why was beomgyu's childhood friend calling you?
"i'll come down soon, what is this about may i ask?" you questioned, grabbing your keys and wallet. "please hurry, run, i don't care, beomgyu's life is on the line. please yn.." soobin answered, shouting into his phone, he didn't want to waste anymore time, he started asking near passerbys about the whereabouts about beomgyu. your eyes widened, beomgyu? you dashed out of you house, yelling a quick goodbye to your mother.
"yn? it's raining take an umbrella-" the door was slammed shut, you tried calling beomgyu's phone, no response. the rain came pouring down, you were soaked in the salty rain. you ran towards the convenience store near your school, only to see soobin conversing with your art director.
"soobin!" you shouted, eyes filled with panic. soobin thanked your art director, you were confused, what were they talking about? "let's go, the apartments, your art director assumed that he might be there since she saw him headed towards that direction." soobin ordered, running. you ran along with him, taking notice of the plastic bag he was holding. it felt like forever, you were panting, gasping for air. the atmosphere was thick, both you and soobin were drenched.
"you take the elevator, i'll take the stairs." soobin said with a stern look, sprinting up the stairs. you pressed on the elevator button that closes the door multiple times, in hopes that it'll be faster. as soon as you reached the rooftop, you bolted out of the elevator, towards the two dark figures you saw in the distance. you begged your legs to hurry up when you saw beomgyu stick his leg out, risking it all. soobin's eyes widened, his hands reaching out for beomgyu, however..
"beomgyu!" you sped past soobin, reaching out to beomgyu first. half of your body was over the ledge, soobin grabbed onto the lowerhalf of your body, making sure that you wouldn't accidentally fall over. beomgyu looked up to see your desperate look, tears falling out of your eyes.
"do you really want to die that badly gyu? there's many other ways you can do this you know." you choked out, sobbing harder. beomgyu felt guilty, he looked down, realising how high it was.
"i don't want to die, but.. i'm more afraid of living under these circumstances." beomgyu managed to utter out, his voice muffled by the sound of rain hitting the surface below you.
"you know how proud i am for you that you're able to make it this far? i know how tough your situation is at home, but if you leave like this, you'll leave behind those who actually care for you. if you don't know how to love yourself, i'll teach you how. if you only know how to hurt yourself, i'll care for you! no matter how much life sucks, you need to stay alive, do the things you love, and come back to me. please beomgyu, give me another chance to care for you again!" you shouted, tears spewing out of your eyes, dripping on beomgyu's wet face, beomgyu felt himself whince, seeing you in such a state pained him.
beomgyu's hand reached out for yours, you turned around, giving soobin the signal to pull you two up. all three of you fell on the ground, you and soobin panting hard for oxygen. beomgyu stared at the sky, the salty raindrops falling on his face, his eyes red from all the crying. he then felt himself getting picked up from the ground, only to be embraced by your warmth.
"you fucking idiot, don't scare us again." soobin cursed out, his nose red from crying earlier, sniffling loudly. beomgyu chuckled at soobin's reaction, wrapping his arms around your waist, hugging you tightly. he missed this comforting, warm embrace of yours. constant apologies came out of beomgyu's mouth, trying to calm you down from this whole incident.
"please, never do that again." your puffy eyes and runny nose made beomgyu laugh, his hands wiping the tear rolling down your cheek. "oh right soobin, what's that in the plastic bag." beomgyu asked, pointing towards the wet bag. "oh it's the notebook i found on your desk, and your phone. also is this notebook some love confession book for yn or something." soobin blabbered, his lips curling up to a smirk. your head turned towards soobin quickly, accidentally knocking into beomgyu's chin.
"shut up, i use that book to write down stuff i want to tell yn." beomgyu admitted, averting your eyes, "guess i'll give it to your as an apology.." beomgyu pouted. you smiled at him, teasing him slightly.
"beomgyu, if you need a place to stay for awhile, you should stay at mine, my parents won't snitch. in the meantime, we can file a lawsuit against your parents." soobin advised, beomgyu gulped at his words, suing his own parents? he didn't want to since well they're his parents afterall, but after all he has been through, he nodded his head, standing up from the wet slippery ground.
"let's go back to the art studio to dry up first, just like the first time." you grinned at beomgyu, dragging him along with you. soobin grumbled behind you two about how he has to thirdwheel you two now. the three of you laughed, making your way to the art studio, the sun now out, shining brightly around your surroundings, glowly radiantly in the sky. this may be the most eventful summer you've ever experienced.
end ༘⋆✿
author's note: sorry if this is super long, and for the bad english. but i hope you enjoyed!!
THINKING ABOUT SECRET DOM KAIIII AHHH TOES CURLED. imagine 0t5 chilling then the convo turns into sex. Kai secretly likes u right right so like u were like… wait let me write this (sorry i cant write well..)
“kai? He wouldnt hurt a fly” i laughed, looking around expecting everybody else to follow, but i was met with silence and 4 raised eyebrows.
the 4 looked at eachother, kai stunned and frozen in place, wide eyed and jaw creaked open. “kai?…” beomgyu finally broke the silence, then he was met with 4 stares. i was so confused, was i supposed to know something that i didnt?
“kai is the opposite of gentle” soobin shruggs, yeonjun nods and adds onto the convorsation “he also doesnt know how to put his shit away, or be quiet!” he slaps kai’s shoulder but he just looks at him with eyes as if hed been stunned.
when he gets up, he runs to his room and slams the door shut, then yall fuck idk what to write now but JUST IMAGINE FINDING OUT UR SWEET LIL HYUKA IS A SADISR LIKE ON MY MY OANTIES ARE POOLING OH MY LROOSOOAOA
#🎀
OMG ANNONIE THIS IS SO GOOD??!?!? imagine him making u scream while he pounds into u and the other 4 hearing it 😭😭😭 he would fuck u so hard and be so rough.
he pushes you onto his bed tearing your shorts and panties off “mmh.. i’ve been waiting to fuck this pussy for so long” he whispers in your ear making you whimper. he groans while sliding into your wet hole. “k-kai you’re t-too big- fuck!” he thrusts deeper in your tight hole. “nghh kai..” tears rolling down your cheek. “is my little slut gonna cum?” he looks down at you while smirking, you nod trying to keep quiet. “i wanna hear you” he says lifting your chin up making you look at him. he pounds into you harder, you’re a moaning and whimpering mess. “kai! ff- i’m coming!”, coming at the same time as him. he pulls out of you and slides your shorts and panties back on.
when you walk out of his bedroom the others are just staring in shock 🧍♀️. its so awkward after help
my veins full of sweets, the forbidden lines slowly fade away - choi yeonjun
forbidden love, dark fairy prince!yeonjun x light fairy princess!yn, mention of death
synopsis : dark fairy! yeonjun finally confesses his feelings for you, however as you start to agree to his feelings, fate has different plans.. and so does the head of the light fairy community
“yn… i love you…”
you turned your gaze towards yeonjun, who crouched behind your sitting figure. his hands braiding flowers into your hair, as he abruptly stopped, catching sight of your innocent eyes. playing with the flower between his hands, twirling it.
“junnie.. y’know there’s a strict line between dark fairies and light fairies.. the council would never let us even get close, in fact.. even our meetings are quite against everything they stand for.” you replied, however, your eyes just couldn’t resist the sight of his strawberry pink lips. you looked into his dark orbs.
“but.. who said the council has to know..?” he smirked, taking your hand into his, pressing the back of your hand against his lips. the lips that you so desired to kiss. in all honesty, you had returning feelings for the fae that was still crouched behind you.
“yeonjun.. i really love you, too.” you admit, your hand coming to cup his cheek, your free hand pressed against his chest. “i can never help but feel like you light up fireworks in my tummy.. nobody else has ever done that, you take care of me like no one else does.. and i’m-.. i’m willing to take a risk to be with you.”
“my pretty princess, you surely would do anything for me, huh ?” he rhetorically asked, knowing your response to his curious words. you had the same effect on him that you claimed to receive from him. yeonjun as the prince knew that his kingdom had no problem with dating a light fairy, in fact, it was quite celebrated. however, your kingdom had low expectations for the dark faeries, they truly thought that whatever connection light fairies had to dark fairies was just a mistake and that they were just trying to play with your feelings.
“of course i would, you’ve done so much for me. you’ve truly won me over.” you giggle, seeing yeonjun’s lips turn upwards. he truly felt like he was on cloud 9, whatever that meant, he heard his human friends say it quite often. there were times when yeonjun would travel outside of the seelie realm and into the ‘real world’.
his hand lifted your chin, taking in your beauty before deciding to press a deep passionate kiss on your lips. a tingling sensation in your chest as you desired to keep your lips warm by having his lips on yours. although you pulled away, deciding to control yourself for the day.
“hmm.. it’s time for my princess to go, isn’t it ?” yeonjun spoke up, realizing that the sky was beginning to glow orange. the sun setting on the horizon, he smiled, taking a look at you and carefully caressing your cheek. he stood up, pulling out his hand for you as you gladly accepted it.
“unfortunately so, but we’re still on for thursday, right ? i truly wish that i could invite you to the ball, however, we don’t have the pleasure of meeting in front of the council.. or really any light fae.” your voice sounded disappointed, yeonjun brushed his thumb against your cheek.
“don’t be so disappointed, my love. be patient, we’ll be able to be with each other soon enough, plus i completely understand that i can’t come, we can always just discuss another meeting.” he grinned, his face beaming with pure sunshine. as he pulled you into a hug, lightly and gently squeezing you. he pulled you away, pressing one last peck on your lips. picking up your basket and holding it out to you.
“see ya’ thursday, yeonjun.”
“bye bye, my love.” yeonjun’s guards walked up next to him. smiling at the idea of seeing their prince so caught up in such a lovely relationship.
“you really do love her, your majesty.”
“i do, i just wish that the light fairies could stop stereotyping dark fairies, maybe then we could finally have a peaceful and normal life.”
you practically skipped into your mother’s office after hearing word that she needed to see you. your basket hanging on your forearm as you entered, face beaming with pure happiness. while your mother was happy to see you, she wasn’t very happy from the reports that she had gotten.
“yn..” your mother called out to you, something about her was that she had been in lead of the council for a rather long time, and you were next in line. “my knights have reported that they caught sight of you with the dark fairy, yeonjun choi.. is this a fact or something that they might have mistook..?”
“i think.. they must’ve seen somebody else, i was just in the forests, out for a picnic.” you stuttered feeling quite anxious due to your current interrogation and.. you didn’t feel well lying to your mother, you hadn’t really lied about your relationship with yeonjun until now, you just avoided speaking the truth.
“but yn.. you decorated that basket when you were just a kid, don’t you think that it looks a bit familiar to the basket in this picture ?” your mother turns over a paper, showing a clear picture of you and yeonjun. it was clearly obvious that it was you in the picture and maybe this was all a test to see if you were willing to tell your mother the truth.
“i’m sorry, mother. i just.. we were just talking, and i know that the council doesn’t like any relations to dark fairies so i didn’t tell you..”
“unfortunately, you’re right. my sweet princess, you know that you can’t go around seeing the dark fae, they’re bound to hurt you at one point or another. so instead of immediately turning you in, as your mother, i must protect you. you have to choose, the dark fae or the light fae.”
“c-can i talk to yunjin..?” you questioned, tilting your head as you attempted to hide the sheer nervousness, even though you weren’t very successful in that mission.
“yn.. you shouldn’t even have to hesitate.. but yes, you may talk to yunjin.” your mother was right, you shouldn’t have had to hesitate.. not when you just told yeonjun that you were willing to risk everything to be with him, yet here you were. you quickly tried to exit your mother’s office, but she had one more thing to say. “from now on, you won’t exit this palace without an escort.”
you silently acknowledged her words, leaving the room. you spotted yunjin beginning to exit the palace, running over to her side. the blonde could only stop in her tracks as she turned around to see whose footsteps she was hearing. she grinned as she noticed you.
“something wrong ? you look so… scared.” yunjin asked, commentating on the way that you looked.
“i think… i’m going to run away.” you state, yunjin’s facial expression changing into a worried one, she grabbed onto your hand. both of her hands wrapped around your singular hand.
“why ? you can’t just.. run away..? yn, you have a duty here, you’re the only one trained to take your mother’s spot and you’ve been assigned with so many tasks these past few days.”
“i get it.. but-.. i’m not giving up on love.” since yunjin was your best friend, she knew about you and yeonjun. she knew that your were quite serious about him, but she couldn’t just encourage you and your plan to run away.
“yn, yeonjun is like the definition of dark fairies, he’s literally the meaning of temptation.. do you know how many light fairies have turned against us because they ‘fell in love.’” yunjin questions you, her gaze following you quite intently as you began to pace around the hall.
“there’s a reason they don’t return, yunjin.. the council doesn’t support these relationships and they decide to just banish any person who loves a dark fae.. it’s not right.. they separate faeries from their families, all due to fact that they’ve experienced true love..” yunjin let out a sigh, knowing fully well that she had no chance in changing your mind no matter what.
“when ?”
“well… umm, first i kinda wanted to meet up with him.. but i need an escort..” you replied, “are you free ?”
“i am, i was just leaving to head back home.. why ?”
“he usually spends a bit of time in our meeting place, can you ‘escort me’ ?” you ask your friend, hoping that she will be able to aid you in your desires. she simply nods, holding your hand and guiding you out the palace. however as soon as you make it out, you are stopped by a few guards.
“are you out to meet your boyfriend ?” a specific guard asks, you can recognize that voice. he took off his helmet, showing the familiar face of huening kai.
“no…” you lie, a bit of guilt pouring over you for lying to your rather close friend. however, you couldn’t say what you were up to, or else kai was sure to lead you back to the palace and to your mother.
“y’know, soobin told us to keep an eye on you. especially since we heard that you were out seeing a dark fairy.. you really should be careful, life isn’t like what it seems like..” huening advised, “i’ll come with you, wherever the two of you go.”
“ah kai… it’s just that yn has something pretty private to show me ? something quite personal.. we were only leaving to get a bit of privacy..” yunjin attempted to convince him, which worked quite successful as huening simply nodded before guiding the guards behind him into the palace. you smiled at yunjin, happy for her save, she seemed to be quite proud of herself as well.
you took yunjin’s wrist guiding her to your and yeonjun’s meeting spot. running through the forest, you eventually ran into yeonjun’s guards.
“where’s his highness ?” you questioned, trusting his guards to give you directions, however they were wary of yunjin. yeonjun had told his guards about keeping you safe, which meant they weren’t really okay knowing that your secret would be revealed in front of someone else.
“your highness, are you sure it would be safe for you to expose your secret in front of another light fae ?” one of his guards whispers, only getting a nod in return.
“the secret has gotten out… her majesty already knows..” you admit, the guards’ faces immediately appearing with fear. they turned around, one telling the other to go get the prince. although, the prince beat them to it. running to you with his arms completely open, only to wrap around your body.
“are you okay ? have they done anything to hurt you ?” he practically interrogates you, pulling away only to put his hands on your cheeks.
“i’m fine.. for now.. being her majesty’s daughter comes with its benefits, instead of instantly turning me into the council… she’s making me choose between the light fae and the dark fae.. junnie, i don’t know what to do-“
“yn, you know what you have to do.. you have to choose your own kind. if you choose me, then you’re bound to never see me again, they’ll banish you.. but if you choose the light fae, then maybe you’ll have a chance to maybe see me in the future..”
“but jun.. i want to leave. i don’t want to spend my life without you, i don’t want to face any kind of banishment just because i decided to follow my heart.. we agreed that we would do anything for each other, and i want to run and hide from the council.. i want to wake up every morning in your arms. i want to feel your sugary sweet kisses each and every day. you’re so addictive to me, jun. it’s nearly like my veins are full of sweets.. please my prince.”
yeonjun couldn’t help but feel guilty, all of this was because of him. you’re craving to run away because of him. if he hadn’t approached you that one day then you would’ve stayed as the innocent light fairy that you were. however, he also knew that he had to recognize the council’s misdeeds. there was no need for light fae and dark fae to be separated. the light needs the dark, life needs death, you could only feel happiness if you feel sadness. the earth need a moon. you need yeonjun.
“alright, my sweet princess.. you can come, okay.. but my palace won’t be nearly as majestic and innocent as the light fairy palace. there is some seriously dark stuff, but it’s nothing too scary.. and your friend ? she won’t snitch on us, right ?”
you turn to take a look at yunjin, tilting your head, quietly asking her as well.
“she won’t have to snitch.” you heard your mother’s voice, as she appeared right next to yunjin, with kai and his fellow guards behind her. he appeared apologetic, he didn’t mean to snitch you out, but the second that he arrived to her majesty’s office quarters.. she asked where you had been and he accidentally said the truth about seeing you outside and leaving with yunjin. he truly wish he could’ve taken back his words, he had noticed how happy you had been the past few months and he didn’t want to destroy that happiness even if it meant getting punished for ‘treason.’ “yn, my princess, how many times do i have to tell you to stay away from the dark fae ?”
“too many times.. i lost count..” you honestly answer, backing up into yeonjun’s chest. his hands rested on your shoulders, as his guards stood with high alert, this wasn’t just about protecting their prince, but also you.. after all you were yeonjun’s love, they had to make sure that you were safe.
“your majesty, with all due respect.. i think yn is in my hands now, and whether or not you respect it, yn’s decision is to stay with us dark fairies. you’re aware that once light fairies agree to stay with dark fairies, you can’t do anything.” he spoke with a little bit of sass in his voice.
“i can do something, yeonjun.. if it concerns the life of my own daughter then i will do anything to keep her away from dark fae.” your mother grumbles, you hadn’t seen her so upset in such a long time.
“is it really my fault that she fell in love with temptation or is it the council’s fault for not allowing to let your citizens seek what they so desire ?”
“she doesn’t love you, yeonjun.. she’s only hooked on the idea of you.. and you’re not any better. that’s why the council is so against the dark fae, don’t make it seem like we’re so oppressive towards you and your kind.”
“well when you say it like that, it quite sounds like you’re trying to degrade me and my ‘kind’, however.. i won’t disappoint, yn, so i suggest that you move out of our way..”
“i’m not backing down, yeonjun. either you hand me back my daughter or we will have to punish you.”
“and how would that work ? your council is only eligible for light fairies.. for the dark faerie’s council, i am doing absolutely nothing wrong.. or are you really just so self absorbed that you want to arrest me for using my power to win yn over.. you can do that too, but as soon as an investigator checks yn and i.. well they’ll know that i haven’t done anything to hurt your highness. you’re the same person who practically threatened your own daughter to not follow her heart.. the punishment of banishment isn’t really as vile as taking the life of light and dark faeries just because they have emotional connections to one another.”
“mother..” your head turned to her, eyes widened. her lips trembling, she never thought that the truth would be revealed. she couldn’t bear to come eye to eye with your disappointment. she kept it a secret for a reason, she didn’t want to let you down.. but yeonjun was right, she had completely lied about the punishment that her own daughter was going to receive.
“yn.. i did it to protect you..”
“by what ? giving me a false sense of hope that maybe even if i got caught that i would somehow be able to return ? and you gave me the ‘benefit of the doubt’ by giving me a chance to rethink if i wanted to get banished or not… but i didn’t even know that i was going to be killed.”
“you wouldn’t have gotten killed, i have the power to stop that from happening..”
“but, the council doesn’t accept any kind of bias in the court.. so would you have really done everything in your power to save your daughter ?” yeonjun was keen on getting you out of the light fairy kingdom, only because.. in all reality, the kingdom was full of evil hidden by the form of light. “my kingdom may not seem so innocent, but i’m glad that my court doesn’t build itself off of lies.. so how about we give yn one last chance to decide.. if she chooses to come with me, you’re all the more welcome to come visit, and she must be able to visit you and her friend without any sort of problems from the council.. i, myself, will ensure to secure her with my best guards and even accompany her with my own presence. and if she chooses to stay with you, then i must be allowed to visit her and she will be able to visit me, again with no issues. and this entire encounter must be kept between the people here.. no issues from the council at all.”
“you must be out of your mind, choi yeonjun.”
you turned back to go face to face with yeonjun, his eyes looking down at you. he saw a small frown on your face, he lifted your chin with his thumb and pointy fingers. his eyebrows couldn’t help but furrow with worry washing over him.
“are you okay ?” he whispered, he knew that he might’ve seemed quite cruel with the things that he had spoken out about your majesty and the council, but he was sick and tired of your mother leaving you out in the dark. he knew that the truth was quite hard to come to terms with, but sometimes you need to see the truth for the sake of your own being.
“mhmm… i just.. i really want to go with you, yeonjun. but i’m scared.. scared that she won’t leave you alone if i go with you. what if she tries to hurt you after all of this..”
“yn.. remember that we promised to risk our lives for each other, that i would do anything to end up with you, and i will gladly do so if it means living a life with you.”
“yeonjun.” your mother speaks up, her voice still quite mumbled. “you can continue your relationship with yn… but.. she really won’t be safe in the light fae kingdom. i hate to say it, but you’re right, she’ll have to leave with you.”
“thank you for understanding, your majesty.. yunjin, if it’s not too much.. may you pack my things ?” your mother’s heart ached hearing you not call out with your genuine affection for her. you needed a moment to process the fact that she was okay with the idea of losing you, because even with her claims of not letting anyone hurt you.. she was always in support of the council, the council came first before you did in her eyes.
yunjin could only nod, feeling teary eyed due to your sudden departure. however you were always going to leave and she should’ve come to accept that, but she grew up by your side. although, she didn’t have to worry about you any longer, knowing that yeonjun seemed to have proven himself worthy of taking care of you. you came face to face with her, embracing her in your arms.
“promise to visit whenever you’re free ? we can always have our girls night any time that you are free or in need of one.”
“you better stay out of trouble, you’re quite the troublemaker without me..” she pulled away, smiling at you, before turning her gaze over to yeonjun. “and with all due respect your highness, if you dare hurt our princess, we won’t hesitate to find you.”
yunjin threatened, however neither her or yeonjun had anything to worry about. yeonjun had complete intentions of taking the greatest care for you. and yunjin would realize that sooner or later. “run along now with your lover, i’ll be sure to get you your things.”
○・•*~☆ ○・•*~☆ ○・•*~☆ ○・•*~☆ ○・•*~☆ ○・•*~☆
your eyes watched as the moon began to settle into the night sky, high in the distance, with white specs accompanying it in its rather lonely journey. your hands on the concrete ledge of the balcony, it was right outside of yeonjun’s resting quarters, lovely plants decorating the grayish area. the dark fae kingdom had proven to not be as dark as people made it out to seem. a few sights catching your attention with how beautiful they were.
“are you alright, my darling princess ?” yeonjun questioned, walking up behind you and wrapping his arms around you as his chin rested on your shoulder. you could only move your head up and down, a gentle grin expressing the excitement that you felt to start this new journey with yeonjun.
“i’m all good, you must be tired.. you had to work all day.” you commentated, yeonjun squeezed your body just a bit, ensuring that he was gentle with his movements.
“well.. i would certainly love to get rest, but only if i could get somebody to accompany me to bed.” he smirked, a tingling feeling still lingering in your tummy.
“oh just what have you done to me, my sugary prince ? you can’t have me feeling this flustered already.” you straightforwardly said, “is this your little secret dark fae power that you possess ?”
yeonjun chuckled, as he pulled away a bit, only causing you to turn around. you took a look at him, getting absorbed in his dark orbs, a purple glow from the natural lighting reflecting off of his pretty face. “mmmm.. you’ve got it all twisted, you’re my secret little power. you give me all the strength i need to do anything i have to.. y’know i’m not lying, dark fairies aren’t too different from light fairies, we’re just living out a ‘punishment’ due to our bloodline and predecessors.”
“another hypocrisy in the council’s rather weak stance, huh ?” you spoke, yeonjun’s hands caressing yours, taking in your warmth on his rather cold hands.
“you already know it, cmon, honey.. let’s get some rest..”
“alright.” you took one last look at the moon, the darker the night, the brighter the stars. life needs death. growth may only be accomplished after experiencing pain. hate is not capable of driving itself out, only love is.
yeonjun, the so called darkness, pressed a kiss onto your cheeks. a warm sensation springing up from inside of you, feeling his love.. feeling the strong emotion that he had for you. he pulled away, only to take one last look into your eyes before he pressed one last kiss onto your lips
an : not going to lie… i’m feeling pretty confident about this. me and my sister have been watching shadowhunters the like 2013 series and uhmmm well i got back into my fantasy phase with the seelie queen !! so i hope this is enjoyable
