morgan

19/she/her

[supermariomamafucker]

theyre doing experiments on baby seals on the easiest ways to make them cry. so far taking away their happy meal toy is working the best

[raleighdotcom]

[jame7t]

[prohaloplayer-deactivated202601]

honestly i am on 700 milligrams of water right now and i don't think i am going to make it

[miyavmiyimneyim-deactivated2023]

[markodragic]

my 2022 highlight was when a guy was driving me home after a date and his phone was playing songs on youtube thru the aux on autoplay BUT he was also using it as a satnav so we had to just cope with whatever song came on. anyway we listened to the isolated vocals for "eye of the tiger" in silence because neither of us acknowledged it and it got to a certain point where it would be even weirder if one of us did say something

/edit: I realise a text post doesn't even do it justice, it went exactly like this

[markodragic]

if you're curious there was no second date and I'm pretty sure it's 46% because of this

[probuccalfat1]

being attracted to blond men is a sign something is really wrong with your psyche

[parasitoidism]

In terms of bad omens this is on the level of what a solar eclipse would mean to a medieval peasant 600 years ago

[goldenprairies]

friendly cat at the vintage furniture store

[unioncarbidesuperfan66]

library classification labels

[justghoulishthings]

BREAKING NEWS: I GOIG TO FUCKING GET YOU

[theweirdwideweb]

[play-now-my-lord]

dude, for the last time, i can't cover your shift. it's right in the middle of my weekly wet doritos night. what part of "piggy needs her slop" don't you get

[sclera]

[studiedinapoolofhisownfaeces]

eugh..!! pleugh.. cough cough.. eugffh.. bleugjh…. ptoo…

[tooies]

mad scientist ethics board that makes sure that a project is sufficiently unethical before providing funding

[filmbro]

losing friends the old-fashioned way (drastically diluting their shares in the company we made together and removing their name from the masthead)