This one time at science camp... @leaveitalltohappenstance - Tumblr Blog

• An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.

• A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.

• A bar was walked into by the passive voice.

• An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.

• Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”

• A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.

• Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.

• A question mark walks into a bar?

• A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.

• Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."

• A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.

• A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.

• Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.

• A synonym strolls into a tavern.

• At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.

• A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.

• Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.

• A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.

• An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.

• The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.

• A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.

• The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

• A dyslexic walks into a bra.

• A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.

• A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.

• A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.

• A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony

- Jill Thomas Doyle

neil-gaiman

A zeugma walked into a bar, my life and trouble.

did-you-know

In 1997, two composers created ‘The Most Unwanted Song’ by issuing a public opinion survey and compiling all the lyrical and musical elements that most people found annoying.

The song features a harp with an accordion, out-of-tune children singing about Christmas and Walmart, lots of high-pitched flutes with tubas and keyboard demos, someone yelling random political terms through a megaphone, and an operatic soprano rapping over cowboy music, bagpipes, and screaming.

It’s 22 minutes long.

We're sorry.

Source Source 2

hjarta-deactivated20260124

que-mint-tea

in my experience it goes something like..

fruityfinnegan

thatonesongyouretryingtoremember

wellwaterhysteria

a very quick poem i just wrote, made from excerpts of texts my mum has sent me this year.

wellwaterhysteria

HELLO???

memewhore

ladyofthehouse

godDAMNit that's the stuff.

adelphicoracle

Have you guys seen all the Twitter apocalypse posts. It’s all Titanic sinking gifs and this:

toadcroaky

thecollectibles

The Voices in my Head by Xiaofan Zhang

science-for-the-masses

Woman Who Can Smell Parkinson’s Helps Develop Test

Joy Milne, 72, from Perth, Scotland, has a hyper-sensitive sense of smell, allowing her to be able to smell Parkinson’s disease, which progressively damages parts of the brain over many years.

She discovered her unusual ability when her late husband, Les, developed a different odour when he was 33. She described it as a ‘musky aroma’. That was 12 years before he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s. Les, who was a doctor, was determined to research the link between odour and Parkinson’s, and contacted Dr Tilo Kunath at the University of Edinburgh, who paired up with Professor Perdita Barran to begin the research. They determined that the reasons for a change in the scent of a person suffering the disease is due to a chemical change of the skin oil (sebum).

In the preliminary sessions, Milne was asked to smell T-shirts worn by people who had Parkinson’s and those who did not. She successfully identified all of the Parkinson’s patients, but told researchers that a member of the control group, a non-Parkinson’s patient, did smell like the disease. 8 months later, they were diagnosed with the disease.

Now, a team of researchers at the University of Manchester have developed a simple test involving a cotton bud swiped down the back of the neck that can identify those with Parkinson’s. The molecules on the cotton bud can be examined using mass spectrometry, which helps the diagnosis. This is a huge leap forward, as there is no definitive test for Parkinson’s, and a diagnosis is based on symptoms and medical history. Currently, there are no cures for Parkinson’s, but an early diagnosis can help begin the treatment early, lessening the speed of the deterioration.

Milne says she can sometimes smell that a person has Parkinson’s when walking down the street, but has been told by medical ethicists that she cannot tell them. She is continuing to work with scientists to see if she can smell other diseases, like cancer or TB, and hopes that one day her talent can be considered normal diagnosis.

Source: the Guardian, written by PA Media

mikkeneko

a bit off the topic here but just pondering: This individual had an extremely rare ability, and she was also trained as a doctor. Both factors were essential for recognizing the ability she had and working with it enough to make a replicable test.

Who knows how many millions of human beings are out there today, with rare one-in-a-million abilities like these, who never have the opportunity to make connections about what they mean?

This is why widespread education is important. The more of our population has training, the more of these opportunities will appear.

cyprus-green

Hermione Granger-- The Brightest Witch of Her Age

My version(s) of Hermione was created using Midjourney

...

Plus: Hermione Granger's Otter Patronus

Please feel free to use and share; please don't repost without tagging / credit. Gracias!

beardedmrbean

Was trying to figure out where in Brazil I would need to go to see this, but apparently it was in Glendale, Arizona.

What fun

itsmeimcathy

beardedmrbean

paxamgays-deactivated20161003

fun drinking game for the kids: listen to fall out boy. every time patrick sings ‘ohhhhh’ or ‘woah’ take a shot

werewolfactivist

you will die

wandxrlusting

believers never die

charlesoberonn

New wacky romance manga: A teenage boy gets locked in a bomb shelter with his crush after a false alarm for a nuclear war. The boy later finds out about the alarm being false but he tells the girl the world ended because she said she'll only ever date him "if he was the last man on Earth".

charlesoberonn

New disturbing psychological horror manga: A teenage girl gets locked up in a bomb shelter with one of her classmates after the world ends in a nuclear war. Despite her reservations, the two start to get closer. But there's something off about the whole situation. And her classmate is definitely hiding something.