— lexi howard.

INDEPENDENT & HIGHLY SELECTIVE.

[leftbehiind]

she decided to say  something.

interest tracker.

independent && selective.

lexi howard from euphoria.

[leftbehiind]

on a hiatus for the week !! spring break <3

[copedpoorly-deactivated20241021]

open.

“  you do realize who you’re talking to, right ?  ”

[leftbehiind]

     “ i just thought maybe you could help. ”

[leftbehiind]

BOWEN.

                 he’s well versed . has a good deal of experience under his belt. although it’s not something he’s , like , inherently proud of . none of that really matters , because his past was his past and right now he’s fixated on lexi . their future . the way he’s been so silent about his feelings for too long , and the way this newfound romance has seemingly blossomed before his very eyes . filled to the brim with contentment . glad he took the risk of just admitting it to her . feels like that small void in his chest had been seemingly filled . like everything in this life finally seemed right .

and , god , does he love kissing her . the way her body feels flush against his own . the way it suddenly becomes so hard to keep his hands to himself . can’t quite keep himself at bay , as large palms run the surface of her waist . her hands at his neck , her warmth against him . already missing her lips when they pull away . brings a hand up to brush a stray strand of her caramel colored hair behind her ear . a chaste kiss pressed to her forehead . “ sorry it took me so long to say something . you’re kinda , like , wildly out of my league . “

     she still remembers the moment she realized she was in love with him. when tucker blake stood her up for the freshman formal, her best friend was there to escort her in his place. her tear-stained cheeks quickly transformed into rosy ones as the pair danced the night away. quickly, tucker was forgotten and in his place of her affection stood bowen. 

     in the path of his palms is a warmth she can’t see herself ever tiring of. a sudden desire runs through her, causing her to press herself against him as he did her. nothing is quite enough for her. her hot breath fans against his lips as she tries to steady her heart rate. and cheeks flush yet again as his fingers brush past her cheeks to fix her hair. “ i’m out of your league ? you’re out of my league. ”

[leftbehiind]

BOWEN.

               instantly feels the heat at his cheeks when she calls him hot . “ enough of that . i am not hot , “ he chuckles . basks in her compliments however insecure he is . she always makes him feel so good . “ woah , now . you come to school in a trash bag and i won’t be able to control myself , darling . “

     “ yeah, you are. you’re, like, so hot. ” lips spread into a smile as she admires him and his features. how can he not see how absolutely gorgeous he is ? a soft laugh leaves her as he speaks, hiding her face in his chest. “ you say that like you control yourself now, ” the femme teases.

[peacereflecteda]

                                                @leftbehiind​     (  lexi  )

“    dreams  can  be  weird,           lexi,            i  don’t  know  what  to  tell  ya.                  i’ve  had  enough  of  them  to  know      —       they  don’t  mean  anything.      ”

[leftbehiind]

     “ yeah, but it feels like a sign. i mean, what are the odds of me dreaming about a ladybug and then finding one on my jacket ? ”

[screnarchive-deactivated2022042]

a hundred kissing prompts

please give credit if you repost.

“ just kiss me. ”

“ i really want to kiss you right now. “

“ forgive me with a kiss? “

“ give me a smooch. “

“ you’re mine. “ “ so come kiss me. “

“ maybe if you kiss me, i’ll do the dishes. “

“ i’m here for business — not pleasure. “

“ so you don’t want me to kiss you? “

“ i could kiss you for hours. “

“ how about a good night kiss? “

“ you may now kiss your fiancée. “

“ we should practice for our wedding day. “

“ you, me, bed, now. “

“ i want our first kiss to be special. “

“ you didn’t kiss me good night last night. “

“ we forgot our good morning kiss. “

“ i forgot to kiss you good morning, so i’m doing it now. “

“ i’ve been wanting to kiss you for a while. “

“ kiss me, i’m miserable. “

“ who was your first kiss? “

“ did you pay the bills? “ “ yes — where’s my kiss? “

“ if you want me to kiss you, all you have to do is ask. “

“ you’re a great kisser. “

“ you’ve never made out with yourself in the mirror? “ “ …what? “

“ can i get another one? “

“ every time you kiss me, i swear i fall even more in love with you. “

“ i haven’t mastered the art of kissing yet. “

“ wanna practice? “

“ you’re a great kisser... is there an award for that? “

“ kiss the pain away. “

“ your lips on mine and i'm home. “

“ is there such a thing as love at first kiss? “

“ if i were to kiss someone, it would be you. “

“ you’re irresistible. ”

“ with your lips on mine there's less bullshit coming out of it, so i guess there's that. “

“ you’ve got great lips. ” “ thank you? “

“ kiss me again — but don’t stop this time. “

“ i love it when you kiss me. “

“ your kisses mean the world to me. “

“ i want you to kiss me. for real, this time. “

“ one last kiss is worth being late to work for. “

“ if you kiss me, we’re not getting out of bed today… “

“ you kissed me last night. “ “ and you didn't stop me. “

“ no more kisses! i need to get ready for work. “

“ you’re not much for kisses, are you? “

“ i really want to kiss you. “

“ it’s cute, this thing you’re doing. “ [being nervous over their first kiss]

“ you've never been kissed before? “

“ you’re going to have to guide me through this. “

“ do i just... close my eyes and lean in? “

“ you're just, really cute, and i don't want you to be disappointed... “

“ if you're not ready for a kiss, that's okay. “

“ guess there's some pressure for you too, isn't there? you know, being my first kiss and all... “

“ i want our first kiss to be special. “

“ one day, i'm going to kiss you, and it's going to be magical. “

“ i kissed you. “ “ i know, i... was there. “

“ kiss me again. “

“ you just can't help yourself, can you? “

“ you’re just… you know, i really want our first kiss to be special. “

“ i've always wondered what it would be like to kiss you. “

“ it's just an innocent kiss. “

“ we're friends, right? friends kiss each other all the time. “

“ people kiss each other all the time, doesn't mean there's feelings involved. “

“ i'm sorry for bringing it up. “ “ actually, i would love to kiss you. “

“ you mean, you, and me? kissing? “

“ you've seriously never thought about [us kissing each other]? “ “ maybe once or twice. “

“ you mean us, kissing? “ “ can’t say it never crossed my mind. “

“ let’s just… kiss to see what it’s like. “

“ fuck it. get over here. let’s do it. “

“ it’s just an innocent kiss. it’s not like it means anything. “

“ when you kissed me... it's like my soul got set on fire. “

“ i've heard great things about you. so naturally... i'm a little curious. “

“ it’s not like i’ve thought about kissing you, or anything… “

“ you’re really good at this, you know. “

“ all i want to do is kiss you, all day. every day. “

“ i’ve never kissed anyone before. “

“ you said you’ve never kissed anyone before. i’m planning on changing that. “

“ well, if anybody were to kiss me… i would want that person to be you. “

“ you just can't get enough of me, can you? “

“ and right now... i think you should kiss me. “

“ are you sure you’re ready for this? “ “ i've been ready. “

“ don't make this weird. “ “ but... you haven't been kissed before. “

“ kiss me like you mean it. “

“ kisses aren't necessary. we can stick to hugs and hand holding. “

“ i’ll kiss you right now to prove that i don’t feel anything for you. “

“ you kissed me first. “ “ i definitely didn't. “ “ you were literally all over me. “

“ i’ve been wanting to do that for a while. ”

“ did you just kiss me? “

“ you're full of shit if you think that kiss didn't mean anything. “

“ did we just... kiss? “

“ your kiss already proved it. “

“ shit... i didn't mean to do that. “ you didn't mean to kiss me? “

“ kiss me, and don't let go. “

“ you're not gonna kiss me. “

“ kiss me and you'll find out. “

“ you don't have to kiss me if you don't want to. “

“ and right now, i think you should kiss me. “

“ you shouldn't kiss me right now. “

“ don't speak, just... kiss me. “

“ come kiss me. “

[leftbehiind]

FEZCO.

               funny he thinks as her name flashed up on his lock screen, how after two months of texting and phone calls that lasted hours his stomach still flips in a nervous kind of way; and its fucking laughable isn’t it? in a world of dark shit the one thing that has him nervous as fuck  is a pretty girl called lexi howard. and it reminds him that even if he was made grow up too fast, at heart he’s still just like any teenage boy with a crush on a nice girl; even if he wouldn’t call it that. they were friends; he was getting to know her piece by piece, all the little snippets she shared while sat on opposite ends of his couch, too scared to sit too close, so he keeps his distance, respectfully, cause like – it wasn’t like that.

                  he had some shit to do later, but for lexi, he could be free so he texts back, smile painted as hes looking down at his phone, ignoring the glare he’s getting from ash right now, that eye roll that says you’d never catch me acting that fuckin’ dumb over a girl, ‘ yo, 4 u lexi, always. u wanna come ova?’ sent.  and he waits for a reply, distracting himself as  picks up the shit from the coffee table, gotta look presentable and shit if he was having company.

     she wonders if he’ll answer. perhaps he’s busy today, knowing that he’s a man who people rely on. the difference between lexi and cassie is that lexi doesn’t let her fantasies run wild, grounding herself in reality. she likes to think that she doesn’t crave the same male validation as her sister. whether that’s true or not is another story. she tries not to think about it, finally feeling like she’s a normal girl with a normal life instead of being ten steps behind.

     and yet when her phone buzzes, she feels the impulsive need to check it immediately – heart skipping a beat. she waits a minute, eyes staring at the clock until the time is up.

                                                                                          ‘ can i come over ? ’

     she bites the inside of her cheek as she watches the screen. her eyes reread his words, smiling. she can hear his voice speaking the words, causing a laugh to emit from her lips.

[leftbehiind]

BOWEN.

           doesn’t want to be overbearing , and doesn’t want to freak her out . it’s why he’s on his best behavior , opting for a sweeter kiss . softer kiss . god only knows , if he hadn’t been so well behaved … shakes the thought , can’t let himself go down that road just yet . doesn’t want to rush with lexi . wants to take his sweet time with her . relish every moment that comes in between . always been soft , always been gentle . she brings it out even more in him .

“ i’m kind of an idiot , if you haven’t noticed , “ he laughs nervously . of course , he noticed , but never did he think that it was because she actually reciprocated these feelings . her lips meet with his own once more , but this time the kiss is different . his hands find solace at her waist , pulling her into him . there’s passion in her kiss , his lips working feverishly with her own . doesn’t matter if her body was flush against his own , he’d yearn for her to be closer . to become one . this was the kind of kiss he dreamed about . the kind of heated passion he dreamed of sharing with her . the mutual pining blissfully apparent in the way her lips work in rhythm with his own . it’s hell to pull away from her , but he really doesn’t want to rush , and god - does she tempt him . “ is that you saying you love me too ? “

     lexi isn’t the most experienced person. it often seems like everyone she knows is so ahead of her that it’s unattainable, but she doesn’t feel the same rush. wants the big moments, but longs for them to be with someone she cares for on a deeper level. perhaps she’s subconsciously been holding out for bowen. if they weren’t childhood friends, she wonders if he’d even notice her.

     her laugh arises from her at his words. every part of their next kiss is honest. they’re bearing their souls to one another and she wouldn’t want it any other way. every part of him makes her want to be closer. her palms rest at the back of his neck, gently caressing his skin as she lets her lips move with his. it’s natural, unlike anything she’s known before. but it’s exactly what she needs. she feels his desire for her matching her desire for him. she’s pressed to him, skin on skin if the fabric of their clothes wasn’t in the way. when he pulls away, she’s forced to catch her breath. yet, all she can do is smile. “ yeah, i love you. i’m in love with you. ”

[leftbehiind]

BOWEN.

           “ i’m glad it’s good enough , ‘cause it’s all i can give you right now , “ he teases , nose scrunching . his eyes roll at her dismissal . “ yeah , they may be just clothes , but you wear them well . though , i am kind of biased . i think you could honestly wear the weirdest shit and i’d still think you’d look amazing . “

     “ you really don’t know how hot i find you ? bo, you’re, like, insanely gorgeous. ” hand rests against his cheek, eyes looking at his so he knows how much she means it. “ i’m gonna hold you to that, ” lexi says with a laugh. “ i’ll show up to school in a trash bag and see what you think then. ”

[hclltothefire]

@leftbehiind → lexi! hit the 💜 for a starter!

getting involved in extra curriculars wasn’t really elliots thing but, it was music, and it was something that would look good on college applications, right? not that he realistically saw that for himself, unless by some miracle he got a scholarship, no matter how much he made bank on selling music stems online, it wasn’t close to college tuition level shit, and not when half of the money went up his nose; literally.

he had to admit, he was kinda suprised by how fierce lexi was, she seemed like the wallflower type but as rehersals went on, she was proving him wrong on all accounts. “so like, do you want me to record this shit, or you wanna have it live on the night?” he wonders, guitar in hand sheet music spread out messy on the floor at his feet. “ it’s cool  either way, be kinda dope to play live though.”

[leftbehiind]

     frankly, she’s surprised that elliot agreed to help her. considering he’s close to rue and she and rue aren’t exactly the best friends they once were, she figured he’d say no. but thankfully, she’s pleasantly surprised by a ‘ yes ’ leaving his lips when she asks for his musical expertise.  

     lexi’s seen a new side of elliot, a softer one that contrasts his blasé outer layer. “ you wanna play live ? ” she asks, looking over to him. “ you’d probably have more fun just watching the show, right ? ” her eyes look back down at the papers as she sits cross-legged on the floor. she doesn’t want to ask for too much from him, knowing he’s already being more than generous by helping her this much. 

[leftbehiind]

it’s my birthday !! i’ll be on and off today but i’m gonna be more active this upcoming week

[lovesleft]

    * @leftbehiind​ / “This moment will just be another story someday.”

          “ and there’s no one to tell that story better than you, ” jules chuckled.

[leftbehiind]

     “ you think ? i’m, like, really proud of how everything turned out. it was so great. ”

[suburbsdrove]

♡  🍓  °  𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑  ;  @leftbehiind​  liked  featuring  naomi  fell .

“  you  must  be  lonesome  over  here  by  yourself  .  ”

[leftbehiind]

     “ i’m kinda used to it. it’s my normal, you know ? ”

[leftbehiind]

BOWEN.

       “ okay , okay . i believe you , for now , “ he teases . her insisting evokes some laughter from him . always been pretty set in her ways . the way she makes him believe whatever she says with her insisting tone . “ y’know , i can see it , honestly , “ he nods . “ i like how you dress . it’s cute . “

     “ for now is good enough, ” she says with a smile. his laughter is her favorite sound, always brightening her day. her cheeks flush at his words, eyes looking up at him and shaking her head. “ it’s nothing special. just, like, clothes. but i’m glad you like them. ”

[100493503004422]

“flirting” aka staring at u and when u look back at me i look away very fast so u wont see that i was staring at u

[best-of-text-posts]