Be Known, Be Loved, Be Yourself @leviathis-krade - Tumblr Blog

hey kitten. daddy needs to talk to you. your kink blog is great, but you are not highlighting the words correctly. kitten. stop highlighting. this is shit. did you seriously highlight that period. kitten.

thememedaddy

nocontextveggies

clementimetodie

@traditional-latin-math

copperbadge

I have long suspected that the owners of the rental-only apartment building across from my living room have been telling their renters that their floor-to-ceiling glass external walls are tinted and that nobody can see in. I believe I have confirmed my theory this week.

Now, it’s possible that the Nice Lesbians who previously lived on the floor below just liked wearing sports bras without shirts and Captain Underpants who lives above them likes cooking in his boxer briefs.

But Ikea Showroom Guy, who lives above Captain Underpants and whose apartment looks like he owns one (1) personal belonging that didn’t come new from Ikea and that is a skateboard, clearly believes he can’t be seen. A few days ago I passed my living room windows on the way to the kitchen to eat breakfast and found him sitting crosslegged in his giant papasan chair facing his floor to ceiling glass walls, completely naked, eating cereal.

I mean, congratulations, sir, you look great, but I may need to revisit the idea I had to hang a sign in my window announcing “Your windows aren’t tinted.” Technically the building doesn’t allow signs and it could really start a shitstorm and like, I don’t wanna shame Captain Underpants, who seems genuinely unselfconscious about his boxer-briefs, but these people deserve to know the truth.

copperbadge

virdigrishammerrezby

#op change your wifi name to ‘your windows aren’t tinted’ to get around the no signs rule

Fucking galaxy brain, oh my god, that’s genius. AND if I do that they won’t know which neighbor caught them doing Naked Cereal / Great Underwear Bakeoff!

siryouarebeingmocked

conundrumoftime

"NO DWARVES IN MY FOREST 😡"

"Your wife is hot."

"...THIS ONE DWARF WITH IMPECCABLE TASTE CAN STAY"

homunculus-argument

You can teleport one (1) single individual live seagull into any time or place in history. Where would you choose to put it to best fuck with peoples' heads and cause as much confusion as possible?

I'd pick Tutankhamun's tomb, just behind the sealed door, 30 seconds before the seal is broken and the tomb is opened. Imagine throwing that into the curse myth - just as these people are about to crack open the greatest cold one in history, knowing that this is what they'll be known for from hereon, they open the door that must not be opened, and out scatters a frantic, deeply baffled bird, entirely healthy and intact, fluttering away never to be seen again, with no apparent way of how it got in.

camerapits

lmfao

dlight98

I pick this one too

supreme-leader-stoat

21 When all the people were being baptized, Jesus was baptized too. And as he was praying, heaven was opened 22 and the Holy Spirit descended on him in bodily form like a dove. And a voice came from heaven: "You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased." 22.5 And after the dove came another bird. And the voice once again spoke: "Child, stop trying to mess with fixed temporal points."

ruinedchildhood

jewishiei

fuck it torture dance tuesday

beardedmrbean

doomtemparts

one of my friends in a discord server was talking about how they were nervous about their first scheduled acupuncture appointment. another friend offered to do a tarot reading for them. sent this picture.