A nerd of the people

My name is Shay, I've got no real pronoun preferences so you're fine to guess. I am a mutlifandom blog and I tend to migrate, so sorry in advance. My profile picture is by http://rosequart.tumblr.com

[witchblade]

[softypyro]

[catboybreeder]

[homunculus-argument]

It's such a cliché to die tragically. They say that about anyone. No matter when and how I die, I don't want anyone to say that I died tragically. Say that I died comically. That when I drew my last breath, it came out as a comically long, faintly whistling wheeze that just kept going and going for a way longer time than should have been reasonable. And it just kept getting funnier because every time you thought it was over, it would fucking start again, until it finally stopped for good.

I want my last deed on this earth to be to make people laugh in a situation that was supposed to be dead serious.

[supermodelcats]

[highlyillogicalandroid]

Everybody be quiet and listen to his poem

[doyouknowwhatimeme]

[astraltrickster]

I once went on a boat trip where one of these guys ended up flying INTO the boat. Smacked someone right in the side of the head too.

They smell really bad, FYI.

So, to get it back in the water...on the fly, with no internet let alone time to Google the safest possible technique if such a thing even existed, we figured the best way to make the landing feel most natural to it would be to, in fact, throw it like a paper airplane.

It was every bit as satisfying and goofy as it looks like it would be.

[tlirsgender]

I heart prey animal rage I love when characters are fucking insane with terror

[tlirsgender]

When they're not dangerous like a hunter but dangerous like a spooked horse kicking your skull in

[tlirsgender]

Let's hear it for prey animal rage let's hear it for killing everyone else in the world before you'll let them catch you

[pussysoupforthesoul-deactivated]

Squidward clocking out of the Krusty Krab and heading to the nearest gay after hours event 

[bpdcassidy-archived-deactivated]

Come on, now, op. We all know squidward doesn’t go to the club.

He’s one of those “I’m not like other gays” gays who goes home to a bottle of wine and his obscure 50s vaudeville records, and then mopes because he can never find a boyfriend.

[calamaricarlo]

I love this website so much

[cinnamonghost]

[eraserheadadult]

when i was a kid i had moments of being so fucking diabolical because i realized at some point the best way to leverage power over my family was to do shit that would make everybody late

[eraserheadadult]

our house was in the middle of nowhere surrounded by woods so when i decided i didnt want to wear dresses anymore if we were going to some event & my parents insisted i had to wear a dress i would just go hide in the woods. was so committed i almost made us miss a flight once bc my mom packed a dress in my suitcase

i only promised to stop doing this if my parents got me formal boys clothes to wear which eventually they did. i don't feel bad about resorting to violence bc i asked politely and they said no. proud of 10 yr old me for evil annoying lesbian behavior

[the-prophesied-disco-gay]

5th grade was the last time I wore a dress for school pictures. When my parents attempted to force the issue for 6th grade, I climbed onto our roof and pulled the ladder up after me. My dad borrowed the neighbors ladder. As soon as it touched the roof I pulled it up too. By the time I had 3 ladders they were willing to negotiate, and 2 hours late for work.

[max1461]

[returnsandreturns]

i made my character a human fighter who’s a housewife/empty nester seeking adventure and wholesome fantasy violence after discovering that her husband is having an affair

is this……

is this how you dungeons 

is this how you dragons

[thegoodqueertheywarnyouabout]

im sorry, but is her age “it’s rude to ask a lady her age”?

[returnsandreturns]

yes. also her weight.

[fishbizkit]

this is a million percent how you dungeons AND dragons

[adventures-in-poor-planning]

i’ve heard a lot of people talk about the EXCELLENT potential of a high intelligence/low wisdom dnd character (i.e. an brilliant academic who keeps setting their dumb ass on fire because they always store their wand in their back pocket)

but i’ve not seen any posts about the equal potential of a high wis/low int character (i.e. someone incredibly perceptive who gives deep and meaningful reassurance to their friends and then 5 minutes later asks what a can opener is)

[briarpatch-kids]

[innerchildabortionclinic]

mind if I come over and behave somewhat like a scared animal before I adjust

[homunculus-argument]

Nice. Managed to do laundry, almost changed the sheets, had a whole thorough-scrub deep clean shower, I've got my work queue done until the next wednesday, and I sent the e-mails that I was supposed to send. Now for tinkering with warhammer stuff.

[maplepekoepop]

Not me staring at this post like a basking reptile hoping the executive function is transferrable

[homunculus-argument]

Even washed my pillow and aired out my blanket! I don't know if hanging your blanket on the balcony to the open air even does anything to clean it, but it sure is cold now!

[lightlyteal]

Finnish people for no reason: place thing in cold outdoors air. to refresh it. reload it even

[homunculus-argument]

Finnish speedrun parenting hack: Place napping baby outside so it recharges faster.

[azrielsshadows42]

There are two types of writers:

1. 'It's fiction, it doesn't need to make sense!'

2. 'I didn't account for the rotation of the planet and how that affects the constalations while my characters stargazed at different times of year, I have failed as a writer, and this entire thing is trash'

[fibro-memes]

[homunculus-argument]

A magic staff that only has two spells:

instantly transfigure any living creature into the corpse of said creature (may not work on creatures larger than the caster)

summon brain damage

[waywardsou2]

Some idiot: "Why are you reading your own fic, that's shallow and stupid"

All fanfic writers and writers everywhere: "Who the fuck do you think I wrote it for?!"

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

ya’ll were really gonna let me live my life in ignorance thinking mr. rogers was straight???

[westiec]

oh whoops, did we forget to tell you? there’s a quote in The Good Neighbor where Mr. Rogers talked about being attracted to both men and women

[shy-marker-pliers]

FRED ROGERS I LOVE YOU EVEN MORE

[shy-marker-pliers]

WOOOO

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

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[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

tumblr rediscovering this post in 2025:

[brightlotusmoon]