just vibing i guess

love is only for the brave

[my-2nd-account]

Ilya and Shane driving around one day and All The Things She Said starts playing on the radio and both of them immediately get out of the car and start dry heaving on the side of the road until they calm eachother down and hold eachother for a good ten minutes before getting back to the car and Ilya puts on one of his playlists and they never turn the radio on again

[pinenora317]

Heated Rivalry ll S01EP04

[princessracecar]

In my brain Cliff Marlow is one of the few people who learns about Hollanov and is like yeah that makes complete sense. I just imagine Ilya admitting to him that he's bi and dating Shane Hollander and Cliff is like oh yeah I totally see that. And Ilya is like um what????? Because literally no one else who has found out about them has thought that. And Cliff is just like oh well Hollander seems so restrained I just always assumed he's a total freak behind closed doors and you would definitely be into that and Ilya is just standing there speechless because he's... not wrong.

[nightspires]

My fave #real hc for hollanov is that Ilya is a prissy little rich city boy who doesn’t know how to change a lightbulb or what the right footwear is for a hike or where he would even begin if he wanted to put up some new shelves. His dad never cared to teach him any of this stuff and he never really had any reason to learn. Whereas Shane grew up spending his summers in the Canadian countryside, swimming in the lake and Being At One With Nature, and his parents were very present and probably enjoyed showing him how to do these things.

And we #know they both have insane competence kinks so when Shane opens a toolbox to put up a new shelf, Ilya is suddenly questioning his whole life bc who the hell gets all hot and bothered by a Phillips head screwdriver?!?!

[caralikesgay]

ok this is mostly a collection of ilya "good top" rozanov headcanons that took on a life of their own

ilya's reputation as a "womanizer" and a "ladies man" takes hold pretty early in his career

he's got a girl in every port, the man's having a lot of sex everywhere

(most of his teammates know that he's got a special fondness for jane in montreal, but that's neither here nor there)

shane genuinely isn't jealous, what ilya does when they're apart isn't his business, as long as he has ilya's undivided attention when they're together, which he absolutely does

someone makes a joke on twitter that all of the women he's banged ought to start a club

this leads to someone making a shirt that says "i hooked up with ilya rozanov and all i got was this lousy t-shirt" and starts selling it on etsy. a bunch of other people make copycat shirts and variations

the fad fades pretty quickly, but there's a brief moment in time where they seem to be everywhere, and jane texts lily every time he sees someone wearing one out in the wild

lily mostly responds with laughing emoji, but one time he responds with "i think that one's real i remember her" and shane has to remind himself that he's not jealous and it's not his business and he has to delete the picture so he doesn't go back and study it

not long after boston wins the cup, a package arrives at shane's secret sex condo, it's a version of the shirt that says "i slept with STANLEY CUP WINNER ilya rozanov and all i got was this lousy t-shirt"

shane is mortified, but also more than a little turned on. at some point he wears it under his other clothes when he meets up with ilya for a hook-up and ilya goes absolutely feral when he sees it

years later, when the whole dallas kent situation hits the fan, people start taking to twitter talking shit about other NHL players (and other pro-athletes in general) who treated them poorly

someone tweets out "i've never really talked about this because i'm not one to kiss and tell and it's really no one's business, but i just want to say that in like 2014 i hooked up with ilya rozanov and he was the most considerate lover i'd ever had. i was relatively inexperienced and so down bad for him that i would have done anything he said, but he checked in with me every step of the way, and *also* gave me crazy orgasms to boot"

and women start coming out of the woodwork responding to the thread with similar sentiments, that he'd set the bar for future hookups and relationships

and people are like "damn, consent king ilya rozanov, didn't have that on my bingo card this year" and "this man was really fucking his way across north america as a service to *us* teaching millenial women to have higher standards for their partners"

someone tweets out "i hooked up with ilya rozanov and all i got was multiple orgasms and really high expectations about consent" and it goes stupid viral

several months later when the fanvid debacle happens and hollanov are outed, that particular corner of social media has another meltdown along the lines of "and he's even bisexual? this makes so much sense"

someone jokes about getting shane a shirt, since he's a member of the club, this tweet makes its way back to harris, who feels like he should warn shane and ilya

ilya posts a picture to instagram of his husband lounging, wearing The Shirt, his underwear, and nothing else. the shirt is very obviously not new, has been worn and washed many times

in the picture, shane's left hand is draped casually across his stomach, wedding ring glinting in the light, as if to remind everyone: this one's mine

[heatedarchive]

The Centaurs' social media team post one of those "guess the real couple" videos (as a joke, because their captain and alternate captain are very publicly married). There's a series of clips of various players being physically and verbally affectionate with eachother. Then it ends on Shane and Ilya, finishing a one on one drill and then hurling insults at eachother across the ice as they argue about who won. It cuts off as Ilya drops his gloves and starts skating over at top speed.

(It breaks containment and people who know nothing about hockey comment with concerns about a hostile work environment, possible discrimination, crossing boundaries. Shane ends up posting the full video, which ends in him grinning as Ilya pushes him into the boards to kiss him. He captions it "since rookie year". Ilya comments "summer before".)

[cardiacanes]

just learned about nhl dad’s road trips where all the players dads travel with them and sit together at the games. so naturally I’m thinking about how ilya had to watch all his teammates interact with their dads while he had to shove down any hope for ever having that kind of support and love from his own father. so when the time comes around for the first centaurs dad’s roadie after shane is traded, ilya is getting ready to put on his best comedic defenses so it doesn’t hurt quite as bad when Shane has to split his attention between ilya and David. but what Ilya doesn’t know is that David commissioned a custom 24-81 Hollander-Rozanov jersey so he could support both of his sons and when Ilya scores the game-winning goal in overtime he sees David on the Jumbotron with tears glinting in his eyes being jostled around by all the other dads and for just a second ilya can bask in the warmth of David’s pride and the ache in his chest dulls for just a moment

[kosmogrl]

I had every right to be angry and bitter when I was 14

[my-2nd-account]

How much do you think it fucked Ilya's brain to be the only human being who gets to witness Shane *standing man emoji* Hollander show up to every hook up walking awkwardly and standing in a manner that makes his huge athletic body look 2 apples tall and not knowing what to do with his hands and the spongebob brain fire meme is happening inside his head trying to start a conversation and looking around nervously up until the second Ilya's lips touch his and this bitch turns into a full fucking sex machine tank full of horny fuel rubbing himself on Ilya's dick like he's trying to light a match on a brick wall climbing him like a spider monkey scratching his back and peeling off enough skin to put him behind bars for attempted murder dropping to his knees nuzzling his face on Ilya's crotch and swallowing his dick like it's the only meal he can eat call that a macrobiodick diet and he's ripping Ilya's clothes off and bending over the first piece of furniture in sight and as soon as he's done getting his ass ate he's throwing Ilya on the bed and riding him like a cowboy from the Academy Award winning cowboy movie of his namesake (I just found out about Shane 1953 like 2 seconds ago) and reducing Ilya to a babbling pathetic Russian mess begging to come.

And as soon as they're done, Shane walks out of the bathroom like he just fell from an alien ship and has no idea what planet he's on. He's standing in the doorway fiddling with his hands and waiting for a signal to bolt out of the room like his ass is on fire.

[escapepodding]

After Hollanov are out I want Shane to get the reputation of the greatest lay in North America. Like, its Helen of Troy and Shane Hollander, hand in hand bewitching people. Ilya may be Russia and the MLH's Greatest Love Machine, but Shane's dick got that man moving to Ottawa. I want the insane money Boston offered to get Ilya to stay leaked and everyone looking at Shane like 👁👄👁

People staring at Shane in the streets like Aphrodite walked past and Ilya is so mad because HE was the one who laid down mad pipe so good Shane married HIM. (He is that good but Ilya got him so there stop staring!)

[aslongasitsblack]

shane becomes convinced cliff and ilya are having an affair because they keep sending each other shit like ‘let me know when you’re back in boston big boy i want to slob on that monster dong’ and finally shane confronts him and ilya is like no baby this is how straight men talk to each other when they’re convinced each other are straight and shane’s like i have never said anything like that to anyone and ilyas like well except to me ;) and shane punches him in the arm and shows him his texts from hayden and they are all like ‘Hey Shane ☺️ thank you for sending Jackie mothers day flowers. We appreciate you so much man.’ and ilyas like shane. this is so fucking gay

[thatonekimgirl]

Shane and Ilya in Season One: A Ten Year Journey

[deanmoth]

You’re good here, ok?

[bugslibraryy]

The first time Shane calls Ilya baby, they are half asleep, exhausted limbs heavy they finally have a night together, two actually, a tiny bit of time together to fall asleep in the same bed, wake up together. Shane had missed that the most from the cottage, desperately, the intimacy of a shared bed, of waking up with Ilya on his chest, sprawled out and head heavy, sweat at his hairline. He missed the feeling of Ilya reaching for him first thing in the morning, waking up to his pouted dry lips and sleep heavy voice.

Anyway it’s the middle of the night, or early morning at this point almost, and Shane is fucking exhausted, sore, he’d been checked hard, more than once in his last game and the the long drive to Ilya right after had left his muscles stiff. He is warm, but doesn’t have the full weight of Ilya, just the tangle of his legs, and Shane wants him, but he’s so half or like almost fully asleep he can’t even make himself roll over closer to Ilya yet. Then Ilya moves, but it’s away from Shane, he’s climbing off the bed and Shane frowns, pouts into his pillow as he listens to Ilya plod sleepy heavy footsteps into the bathroom, feet scuffling. He listens to Ilya walking away from him and he misses him sorely, it’s a pathetic lonely thing, a achey pit under his ribs that feels like notimenotimenotime.

He wants him back, here, now, buried under the hours they have together. Ilya isn’t leaving, (he or Shane is always leaving) but not right now. He wakes a little more, just enough to shuffle onto his side sluggishly, into the head Ilya left behind. He listens to Ilya pee, flush, wash his hands and shuffle shuffle back to Shane, back to their bed. Shane wants him so intensely in that moment, the weight of him crawling back into their bed that his whole body thrums with it, aches, deeply. It fuses with a heady joy of knowing Ilya is crawling back into bed with him. His boyfriend, their bed, them. Shaneandilya how it’s been since the first time, a universe between them, the whole word between their mouths, hands, bodies.

Ilyas steps are slow heavy and Shane wants him here now he wants the heat, weight, shoulders of Ilya right against him. He forces, half lidded, his tired eyes to open just so, watches the shape of Ilya as he gets to the edge of the bed.

Shane reaches his hand out, grabby fingers, licks his lips and half whines, simpers, too tired to ask what he wants to explain that he has this cloying aching insane need for Ilya in that moment- to feel him, to know he knows him, to reach for his boy in the middle of the night and have his hand touch Ilyas skin not his sheets, Ilya two hours away. He wants to want him and have him.

Ilya is in the bed with a press of the mattress, all limbs and warm and his Ilya there, humming back to Shane, a nonsense sound and flops himself half on Shane, wriggling against him to knock their limbs into fitting together somehow, too sleepy to make proper work of it.

But Shane, Shane wants to cuddle properly he wants to be pressed together, wants to feel the shifting of Ilyas breathing, wants to be held.

“Come here baby” Shane breaths, the words half formed an kinda mushed together as he properly pulls Ilyas body over him, hand in his hair to fit his face to the curve of his neck, pressed close and warm.

Ilya lets out a soft keening noise and Ilyas arms, strong and firm and warm squeeze around him, collects him up into his chest tighter, they fall asleep in the next few breaths.

(The second time Shane calls him baby, he’s lucky enough to see the blush that pinks across the high of Ilyas face)

[itshype]

Yes, the fics where Ilya goes to Shane's game in his jersey are cute and romantic. But why has no one even considered:

[lilithfromedom]

i get you on a personal level, my dear ilya rozanov. im also a bisexual depressed yearning whore who only wants to be held tenderly with love

[slitheringghost]

i love how ilya asks shane whether he likes women and how he never hears about shane with women - out of genuine curiosity imo - and then the moment he does hear about shane with a woman he is like, Well I Guess It’s Time To Kill Everyone And Also Myself