HopeFaithLove

[universallsound]

[weavemama]

America is about to be that part in the lion king where where pride rock became all shitty bc Scar became king

[montanajade98]

But what about vampire history teachers. Vampires who read something from a text book then proceed to light the book on fire and throw it out the window because “No. that’s not even close to what really happened. Listen up nerds I’m about to teach you what really happened in France during the revolution”

[sapphosigns]

I need this as a series

[gefdreamsofthesea]

Vampires sharing the recipe for Greek fire.

Vampires speaking in dead languages.

Vampires being able to translate untranslatable scripts.

Vampires who react to straightwashing historical figures like “Are you kidding me everyone knew that man was queer!”

Vampires from cultures who were once antagonistic towards each other stubbornly maintaining a friendship that’s lasted longer than their civilizations.

Vampires who honour forgotten deities you won’t find in mythology books.

[radio-freedunmovin-deactivated2]

Also, vampires who secretly saved stuff from the Library of Alexandra.

[freyadragonlord]

A vampire show that does not revolve all around sex and eternal cursed love.

[northcentralpositronics-blog]

nerd vampire whose knowledge of current events is terrible but they can always remember everything that’s considered “history” so they have a super-detailed knowledge of everything up to about thirty years ago and then ?????

vampire who couldn’t tell you what caravaggio was known for but duelled with him at least three times and slept with him at least ten. “cara-who OH YOU MEAN MICHAEL yeah he was cool”

vampire who spent 100 years in a convent and is still so bitter that in all that time they never made her mother superior “GODDAMMIT I HAD SENIORITY! I HAD SENIORITY!” “okay so first off janet, that was six hundred years ago, but more importantly, maybe if you didn’t always start those complaints off with blasphemy…”

vampire professor who just sort of showed up at oxford when it was founded and is still there (and nobody’s noticed because he still never actually shows up to his lectures)

vampire politician who lifts all their campaign speeches wholesale from speeches given 200 years ago and just waits for someone to catch them out (nobody ever does they’re prime minister and their approval ratings are through the roof)

[northcentralpositronics-blog]

WAIT I HAVE MORE

queer vampire who constantly talks about the fashion for straightness and you need to be really careful because if you tell them straight is default they WILL scream at you for five days straight about what a modern concept heterosexuality is

vampire hoarder who has an entire town where they just kept having to buy new houses to keep their stuff in and some of it’s probably worth tens of millions by now but you’ll never find it in among the 1950s kitschy kitten sculptures and boxes of newspaper (the newspaper is a wonderful mix of yesterday’s guardian and daily courants from 1725)

vampire sailor from manderville’s time who just has so many stories and some of them might even be true

vampire bluestocking girl who took to the internet like a fish to water and spends her whole unlife engaging reddit antifeminists about women’s rights because that’s one fight she’s determined to see through. also with the advent of cheap dyes she literally wears blue socks every day and hopes one day someone gets the joke

vampire doctor who just gets SO CONFUSED about the literature because do you know how hard it is to keep up with medicine kevin? when i got my doctorate we thought leeches were good and then they were bad and now they’re good again? i was published in issue one of the lancet kevin that is 387 lancets kevin how the hell am i meant to remember which one’s current kevin why are they saying cannabis is good for pain like this is news??? (but also lives in a state of wonderment every day in hospital because wow look at all this stuff we can do now look at it kevin!)

entire coven of vampires constantly quibbling over manners because they’re all from different periods: “HATS OFF AT TABLE” “SCREW YOU LEONARD ONLY PEASANTS EAT BAREHEADED” “TABITHA THAT HASN’T BEEN GOOD MANNERS SINCE THE 1500S NOBODY HAS LICE ANY MORE” “IT ISN’T ABOUT LICE LEONARD IT’S ABOUT GOOD MANNERS YOU NEED TO HAVE GOOD MANNERS WHEN YOU HAVE PEOPLE OVER FOR DINNER” “I SWEAR TO GOD TABITHA IF YOU MAKE THAT PUN ONE MORE TIME I WILL SHOVE YOUR STUPID HAT DOWN YOUR THROAT”

[bumbleandbumble]

vampire musicians who might not have been child prodigies but goddammit 500 years of practicing an instrument is bound to get you somewhere (also knowing the composer and being the first person to start playing a song doesn’t hurt either)

[moonsofavalon]

my favorite will always be vampires who know fuck-all about the standard major historical events because they were always somewhere else whenever big shit was going down:

“yeah i heard about the hundred years war but i was in northern african at the time so…”

“the roman empire fell??? how did the fucking roman empire fall??? i spend a fucking handful of decades in india and i come back to this???”

“russia needs to stop having revolutions, i can’t keep them all straight…”

“when did france become a democracy?? and america’s now it’s own country??? i’ve spent the last century in a forest in wallachia scaring small children so––wHat dO yOU meAn we’re calling it romania now??? when the fuck did it become romania???”

“WE HAD A WORLD WAR??? WE HAD TWO WORLD WARS???? well obviously ‘world’ is an exaggeration because i heard nothing about it while i was lost in the amazon rainforest for the last fifty years…”

“listen i spent most of the fourteenth century as a pirate in the south china sea so someone’s gonna had to clue me in on all this ‘black plague’ nonsense.”

[tiddygun]

@daedrinking

[vanman229]

@thoroughly-sherlocked

[lookingasyouare]

Happy Halloween! 👻👻 #mylove #firsthalloweenparty #cutestskelletonever

[lookingasyouare]

When you get so giddy over new yarn you don't know what to crochet first 😂😂 #newyarn #crochetbeginner #relaxation #probablytooexcitedaboutthis

[artchipel]

[princesslime-blog1]

[sixpenceee]

A compilation of eye make-up I find to be absolutely gorgeous. 

[furious-love]

😍holy eff I wanna be this good

[unicorns-dolphins-deactivated20]

These are goals af!!

[the-black-mamba0]

Omfg

[movedaccountbih]

THE BOTTOM RIGHT 😩🙌🏻🔥🙏🏻💯👅👏🏻👏🏻

[sixpenceee]

These are fiber optic dresses.

[sweetsugarystars]

“What kind of fabric is that dress?”

“Magic motherfucker.”

[scarletswalking]

I’m so glad this was invented before my wedding.

[lookingasyouare]

Who knew a few pipe cleaners and some chopped up straws could keep him so entertained?? #mylove #learningthroughplay #finemotorskills #hoursoffun #keepshimquiet

[lookingasyouare]

#mylove #mummyshelper #slimmingworldchips🍟 #actifry

[sandandglass]

[lookingasyouare]

#waveoflight

[twenyonepilots]

do you ever get sad attacks and it drains you and you’re just left sitting there like wow this is so uncalled for rude

[got-stars-in-your-eyez-deactiva]

My husband and I are surprising our 6 year old by taking him to Disney for his b-day tomorrow. We’ve been in the car for 4+ hours and he still thinks we are on our way home from school. He keeps saying “looks like we’re almost home!” 😂

Bless his heart.

[got-stars-in-your-eyez-deactiva]

Update: we arrived to Disney World, he thinks we took a wrong turn and is very concerned about who is going to feed our cat.

[n1ff1n]

“I don’t know if that makes me believe in coincidence, or fate, or sheer blind luck, but it definitely makes me believe in something.” (insp.)

[bobbycaputo]

Woman’s Viral Post Urges Dads to Take More Photos of Moms

A viral open letter posted on Facebook this month is reminding parents of the importance of not just photographing their kids, but being in the photos themselves. Back on September 3rd, Glen Rose, Texas-based inspirational speaker Kaylin Maree Schimpf posted a short and simple message on Facebook that urges men to photograph their wives more. “Dear men…. take the photo,” Schimpf says.

“…how many photos does she capture of you, of your family and of your life you’ve built[?],” Schimpf asks. “But when she is gone, those photos won’t show your children the women who was behind the camera.”

“Take the photo,” she continues. “Messy hair, no make up or a dirty old t-shirt won’t matter to your children when she is gone someday. What will matter is that you loved what you saw enough to take a photo, to document it, to preserve that moment in time of the woman you love.”

(Continue Reading)

[jumblemama]

As I wrote recently, it’s also good for us to specifically ask others to take pics of us with our children. It reminds everyone that what we are doing is valuable and worth recording.