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I'm just a girl who wants to scream in public, stuck in a world where screaming in public is frowned upon
Fantasy Guide to Addressing Nobility
It can be hard to remember how to properly address your noble or royal characters when writing a fantasy court. Here is a quick guide:
1. King/Queen:
Usually addressed as either “Your Grace” or “Your Majesty”. Consort (married to a ruler and not reigning in their own right) can be addressed the same. Sire or Madam can be used also.
2. Prince/Princess:
They are addressed as “Your Highness”. They are NEVER addressed the same as a King or Queen
3. Duke/Duchess:
These are addressed with “Your Grace”. This was a common term also used by royalty before Henry VIII got to big for his codpiece.
4. Earl (Count)/Countess:
Are almost never referred as the “Earl of Narnia” but “Lord Narnia”.
5. Lord/Lady:
An easy one. They are called “My Lord” or “My Lady”.
6. Emperor/Empress:
These may be equal to a King/Queen for status but the have a grander title. They are only addressed as “Your Imperial Highness/Majesty”
I hope this helps when writing your court or fantasy novel.
5/7/2018: Hey, aspiring fantasy writers!
Having trouble deciding what role is best to give your character(s)? Well then, here is a collection of medieval-fantasy type jobs (both historical and fictional) in alphabetical order that can help you choose the right one.
Abbot; Abbess
Academic/Professor
Actor
Adventurer
Adviser
Alchemist
Alienist
Almoner
Animal trainer
Antiquarian
Apothecary
Arbalest
Arcanist
Archer
Architect
Armorer
Artificer
Artist
Assassin
Astrologer
Auctioneer
Author, Nonfiction
Bailiff
Baker; Baxter
Bandit (Outlaw, Thug, Highwayman, Plunderer, Marauder)
Banker
Barbarian
Barber
Bard
Barkeeper
Bathhouse Attendant
Beast Tamer
Beastmaster
Beggar
Berserker
Bishop
Blacksmith
Bladesmith
Bodyguard
Bookbinder
Bounty Hunter
Brewer; Brewster
Broker
Butcher
Butler
Candlemaker
Captain
Cardinal
Caregiver
Carpenter
Carriage driver
Carter (Carrier)
Cataphract
Chainsmith
Chamberlain
Chandler
Chaplain
Chariot racer
Cheesemaker
Chimneysweep
City guard
Cleric
Clerk
Cobbler
Confectioner
Constable; Marshal
Convict
Cook; Pastry chef
Cooper (barrels/buckets)
Copyist/Scribe
Cordwainer (Shoemaker)
Crusader
Dancer
Deacon
Dentist
Deprived
Detective
Diplomat
Diva
Dockworker
Doctor
Dog trainer
Domestic Servants
Dragonrider
Dressmaker
Druid
Duelist
Dyer
Embroiderer
Emperor/Empress
Enforcer of Laws against Rich Clothes
Engineer
Escapist
Explorer
Falconer
Farmer
Farrier (horse shoes)
Fighter
Fighting Clerics
Fisherman
Fishmonger
Flagellant
Fletcher
Florist
Footman
Friar
Furniture maker
Gardener
Gladiator/arena fighter
Glazier
Goldsmith
Gong Farmer
Grave Robber
Gravedigger
Guardian
Guru
Hack driver
Harbormaster
Hatter
Hay seller
Headsman; Hangman
Healer; Midwife
Hellion
Herald
Herbalist
Hermit
Hero
Houndmaster
Housewife
Hunter
Illuminator
Illusionist
Importer; Exporter
Innkeeper
Inquisitor
Interpreter
Inventor
Investigator
Jester or Fool
Jeweler
Judge
King
Knife thrower
Knight
Lady’s maid
Lawyer
Leper
Locksmith
Logger
Loremaster
Mage
Magician
Maid
Man-at-Arms
Mapmaker (Cartographer)
Mason
Master of Ceremonies
Mayor
Medium
Mercenary
Merchant
Messenger
Miller
Miner
Minstrel; Jongleur
Money Changer
Monk, Nun
Musician
Necromancer
Noble
Noblewoman
Nurse
Nursemaid/wetnurse
Occultist
Official
Oracle
Page
Painter
Paladin
Papermaker
Parchment and Ink Seller
Pardoner
Parson
Peasant
Peddler
Philosopher
Pilgrim
Pirate
Playwright
Poet
Polymath
Pontiff
Pope
Porter
Potioneer
Potter
Priest
Prince
Princess
Prisoner (hard labor)
Produce vendor
Prophet
Prostitute; Courtesan
Provost
Pyromancer
Queen
Ranger
Rat catcher
Ringmaster
Rogue
Ropemaker
Saddler (Yo mama!)
Sage
Sailor
Salt seller
Salter or Daysalter
Schoolmaster; Teacher
Sculptor
Sentinel
Seraph
Serf
Servant (laundry, kitchen, cleaner)
Shaman
Sheriff
Shieldmaiden
Shipwright
Shopowner
Silversmith
Skald
Slave
Slave trader
Smelter
Smuggler
Sniper
Soldier
Sorcerer/Sorceress
Spinster; Spinner
Spy
Squire
Stable hand
Stablemaster
Stained-Glass Artist
Steward
Stonemason
Street Cleaner
Strongman (or woman)
Summoner
Surgeon
Swashbuckler
Sweet maker
Tailor
Tanner (leather)
Taxman
Templar
Thatcher (thatched roofs)
Thief
Thrall
Torturer
Town Crier
Toymaker
Trapper
Traveling Merchant
Treasure hunter
Trickster
Troubadour
Tutor
Undertaker
Vestal
Viking
Wagoneer
Walker or Fuller
Wanderer
Warlock
Warlord
Warrior
Weapons instructor
Weaver; Webster (fabric, rugs, baskets)
Wheelwright
Wisewoman
Witch/Wizard
Witch Hunter
Wood-carver
Wool-carder
Yeoman
If there are more you want to add to the list, feel free to reblog and share your suggestions. The more the merrier!
(Note: Some jobs listed here are probably the same as certain others but with a different title.)
Me trying to figure out the distance between places and how long it’ll take a character to get there in a society that travels mostly on foot:
Relatable…
Good roads, fairly level (or at least gently graded) terrain, reasonably fit human (most in a walking society would be accustomed to all that walking)… If they’re walking mostly in daylight hours with regular rest breaks, plenty of food, a good night’s sleep, all in good weather and with only a mild burden…an adult can do about 30 miles (approximately 48km) in a day.
But if all their transport is done on foot and they have no pack animals, yet are hauling a lot of gear on their back, slow it down to 20mi (32km). If they’re pulling a travois (pole drag) or maneuvering a push-cart, slow it down further.
If they’re traveling at night, it will depend on their night vision and their light source; a mostly foot-based society probably won’t have high-powered thousand-lumens flashlights or headlamps to see by, so slow it waaay down.
If they’re traveling unfamiliar territory, slow it down a little…but on the converse side, if it’s familiat terrain, give them a familiarity bonus and speed up how far they can travel in a given timeframe. (Unless they’re being called home to be yelled at by their parental figures, lol, then slow it waaay down, lol.)
If the road is rough or the terrain steep, slow it down. If the weather is harsh, slow it down. If there is no road where they are going, cut the speed according to the terrain. LIght forest or grasslands, 75%. Modest forests 50%. Thick hack-your-way underbrush/jungle, slow it to 25% speed…and these calculations are after discerning elevation changes and weather conditions and burden management. However, slow it to 10% if you have a frikkin’ cart you’re trying to get somewhere, or any other Wide Load. A travois might be acceptable if it’s narrow.
If you’re traveling with another person and using shoulder carry poles with gear dangling, slow it to about 75% to 50%, depending on their strength and burden weight. (And terrain, weather, etc.)
Also footwear can make a difference. If it’s rough or thorny terrain and the characters are walking barefoot, they’re definitely going to go slower, or if they’re walking with open sandals. Boots don’t always guarantee great traction, however.
If it’s pre-rubber-availability, boots and other leather but non-moccassin shoes are usually either hobnailed or not. If hobnailed, they’re used on muddy terrain, and they can be painful to walk upon over long distances (metal lumps, only a few layers of leather to cut down on construction cost, in most cases). But walking on cobblestones, flagstones, brick roads, etc, means that the metal studs on the bottoms of your shoes run the risk of slipping. (You’ll gain back some traction on icy paved streets, but not on rain-wet paved streets.)
If they’re meant for walking on paved roads, shoes & boots tend not to be hobnailed, but they lack traction and you’ll slip on wet surfaces, and definitely slip on any muddy or icy slopes. If your character can afford it, they could have two kinds of footwear…but even so, they’d still have to carry the weight of that second pair of shoes. People who travel on foot tend to either have lots of servants (often slaves, in historical accounts) to carry extra gear, or they pare down their own gear when traveling.
One way around the different types of terrain traction issue is to make rope sandals, by stitching coils of braided rope in place (think braided rug construction style, not woven like cloth). The coils can provide “grip” or traction–more than smooth leather in mud, more than hobnail studs on paving–and if you make them thick, they can be remarkably comfortable. But it’s not always feasible in wet climates because water will soak into the rope, saturate it, and give it mold or mildew problems over time.
Either way, if you’re wearing the wrong soles for the type of surfaces you’re traveling, that will cause problems, too.
Also, people who travel almost entirely by foot do not wear high heels.
I gotta repeat this one:
People who travel almost entirely by foot DO NOT WEAR HIGH HEELS.
(thank you for comng to my TED talk)
Also, chopping the heels off of high heels does not suddenly make them practical walking wear.
A bird stole like $15,000 from a scientist and he caught the bird stealing it but he let him do it because he was like, “What would you even do with money, you stupid bird?” and the bird kept it in its bird bank and several years later, it was worth more because of inflation and the bird bought out the scientist’s house.
i know it’s just a dream but it would actually be worth less because of inflation. now if the bird bank was returning interest and the interest was greater than inflation (over-simplification, i know) then maybe the money would be more, but it certainly wouldn’t be worth more
More often than not, dream logic ≠ real life facts!
Maybe bird banks are just better than human banks
im a bar of soap and God is an instagram girl with acrylic nails and a box cutter
no, staff, dont change the color scheme,, get rid of the porn bots and nazis!! oh my god they have airpods in they cant hear us oh my g
Source
These dudes are fucking legit. They don’t just show up one day in court, either, they actually make friends with the kids and let them know they have a support system and that there are people in the world who care about them and will always have their back. And less important, but also cool, is that the few times a couple of them have come into my cafe, they’ve been super friendly and polite and when I told one of the guys that I noticed his Bikers Against Child Abuse patch and wanted him to know how awesome I thought he was because of it, he got kind of shy and blushed and said, “The kids are the awesome ones, we just let them know they’re allowed to be brave.”
The source is long, but so, so good. These men and women are available in 36 states, 24 hours a day to stand guard at home, in court, at school, even if the child has a nightmare. Many of them are survivors of childhood abuse as well, and know what it’s like to feel scared and alone.
In court that day, the judge asked the boy, “Are you afraid?” No, the boy said.
Pipes says the judge seemed surprised, and asked, “Why not?”
The boy glanced at Pipes and the other bikers sitting in the front row, two more standing on each side of the courtroom door, and told the judge, “Because my friends are scarier than he is.”
Actual tears.. hnngh
Show me more of people like this, world. I give up on humans too easily.
where do i sign up for this,i want to be in this gang
This is fucking amazing. It may be out of character for me to say this but rock on
Bikers Against Child Abuse was founded in 1995 by a Native American child psychologist whose ride name is Chief, when he came across a young boy who had been subjected to extreme abuse and was too afraid to leave his house. He called the boy to reach out to him, but the only thing that seemed to interest the child was Chief’s bike. Soon, some 20 bikers went to the boy’s neighborhood and were able to draw him out of his house for the first time in weeks.
Chief’s thesis was that a child who has been abused by an adult can benefit psychologically from the presence of even more intimidating adults that they know are on their side. “When we tell a child they don’t have to be afraid, they believe us,” Arizona biker Pipes told azcentral.com. “When we tell them we will be there for them, they believe us.” ( Article)
More about BACA, from their site
My parents are a part of this organization and they are metal af
They go on runs to protect the child if they feel even the slightest threatened no matter where. If the child needs them to go on vacation with them, they do. Bikers come from across the nation to watch over and take shifts for these kids. And the best part is once you’re adopted into this family as a BACA kid, you’re always one. Even when you’re 40 and the perp gets released from jail, they’ll come meet with you and find your best options for avoiding the person and maintaining the life you’ve built for yourself. Once a BACA child, always a BACA child. In Florida, there’s 100% rate for identifying the perp based on the child’s testimony. Why? Because BACA stands with the child and supports the child so they feel comfortable enough to point out their attacker.
What’s better than a badass biker gang being on your side???
NATIVE AMERICAN CHILD PSYCHOLOGIST WHO IS A BIKER AND NAMED HIMSELF CHIEF HELL YES I’M HERE FOR THAT AND BIKERS BEING BAD ASS TO PROTECT KIDS. HELL YEAH.
it’s back! I will always reblog BACA
Damn good people.
I know they wouldn’t consider themselves such, but these people are freaking heroes and the world is a better place because of them.
Hey folks, it talks about this in the article but its not mentioned in this post, BACA is a 501 © (3) charity that depends in part on donations to help pay for stuff like gas for their bikes. If you want to help, consider donating.
@copperbadge You like posting about heroes, Sam. Seems like this would be up your alley.
I love these folks! I’ve reblogged them before but it’s wonderful to see the donation information has been added.
Always reblog. Keep doing what you’re doing y'all.
Guys? This post changed my life. I saw this post. Forever ago. And thought it was only in america… and wished desperately that they could help me. But then I saw it again, during a bad episode, and checked their site. They aren’t just in the USA
They’re in Canada as well and probably other countries. I met and talked with a native guy who runs the place near me. His name is Shaman. I got in, and I’m considered a BACA child now. Despite being 17, turning 18 when I talked to them. They spent time with me when my abuser was over, they gave me therapy resources. They give you something called a ‘level 1′ where they go to your house with as many bikers as they can, i shit you not a solid 20-40 bikers came from even out of province, and met me. I got to choose my biker name and I got a vest with patches on it and my name on it. They all hugged a Teddybear before giving it to me, and told me if I ever felt the BACA bear was running out of love, to give them a call and they’d refill it for me, and then I got a ride on one of their bikes. Just a day or so ago I went to an annual party with them and they we ate food one of them cooked and had a lot of laughs.
I’ve never felt as loved as I did being a part of the BACA family. They also gave me dog tags with the names, and phone numbers of my 2 workers. So I can call them whenever I feel scared.
BACA is an absolutely wonderful group that will do everything in it’s power to help any child whos been abused.
And it doesn’t end when you’re 18 either. As long as you get in contact/get your level 1 before you’re 18? you’re ALWAYS a BACA kid. I’m 18 now and they still invite me to parties, ask me if I’m okay, and are there for me. They’re still trying to find me resources for therapy.
BACA has changed my fucking life.
I hope you all can read this, and reblog it knowing from someone who fucking been with them, that they are absolutely amazing.
This is truly amazing, I’m so glad people like this exist
This needs to be reblogged. Because.
Always reblog BACA.
Signal Boosting because the world needs more biker angels.
Y’all this is so sweet. It’s good to know that there are people who will protect those who can’t protect themselves. ❤️ Love these guys and what they do.
Support BACA!!! “Hard Ride Up”.
LOOK AT ME AND TELL ME THIS ISNT MY AETHETIC. WHERE DO I SIGN UP?
hey
hey friend
dont kill yourself tonight ok
you have a really pretty smile and i know its not always easy to manage one but itd be a bummer if we never had the chance to see it ever again
youre really important and you matter a lot so stay safe and try and have a nice sleep
I would like a moment to thank the people who reblog post like this so that it eventually shows on my dash.
It is keeping me alive
I actually really needed this tonight, thank you
You’re a wonderful being and I hope to God you make it through the pain you’re going though. You deserve so much more.
You’ll get through this.
There are people who care about you, don’t forget that
Hey. You’re great. Don’t do it, okay?
If you see this, you’re legally required to save yourself for a night
Someone unmatched me on tinder because I said I liked the animals he had in his profile. We went to highschool together. He unmatched me within ten minutes and didn't respond, so that's how dating is going for me 😂
someone brought me a gift this morning
In highschool I wrote a story about a middle-generation of stellar travelers. Their parents were born on earth and left as children, and the middle generation will not live long enough to see their destination. They live their entire lives on the ship and I wrote about them trying to find their place in everything. They will never know blue skies and warm beaches and open fields with warm breezes. They’ll never know birdsong or crickets or frogs. They’ll never hear the rain on the roof of a dreary day. I never could find the right way to end the story. I wanted it to be a happy ending, but I didn’t know how to do it.
I realize now that it was a book about me dealing with depression before I even knew it. Looking back at how blatant the projecting was, it’s obvious now. It wasn’t then.
In the story, the middle-generation people are lost. They’re apathetic. They’re just a placeholder. The only job they have is to keep the ship running, have kids, and die. As the middle generation of people began becoming adults, suicide rates were skyrocketing. Crime and drug rates were jumping. This generation was completely apathetic because they felt that they had no use.
In the story, a small group of people in the middle-generation create the Weather Project. They turn the ship into a terrarium. They make magnificent gardens and take the DNA of animals they took with them and recreate them and they make this cold, metal spaceship that they have to live their entire lives on into a home. They take what little they have and they break it and rearrange it into something beautiful. They take this radical idea and turn the ship into a wonderful jungle of trees and birds and sunshine.
And I realize now how much it reflects my state of mind as I transitioned from a child into an adult while dealing with depression. You always hear “it gets better” and “when you’re older things will be easier” and I was so sick of waiting for it to get better. I was in the middle-generation stage. And I was sick of it. I was so sick of waiting.
When I was in highschool I didn’t know how to end the story. I didn’t know how to have a happy ending. I didn’t have the life experience then to finish the story in a meaningful way. I didn’t know how to make it better for these middle-generation characters.
But now that I’m older, I’m learning. That if you sit and wait for things to get better, it never will. You have to take your life and break it apart and rearrange it into something beautiful. You have to make the cold metal ship into the garden that you deserve. You have to make your own meaning. You have to plant your own garden.
You have to teach yourself that being happy is not a radical idea.
Literally no one who follows me is going to know what this means, but HBomberguy, a Youtuber known for Video Essays about pop culture and gaming made a promise that he would live stream himself playing Donkey Kong 64, in its entirety (including picking up every single banana) and all money would go to a UK charity for trans youth (Mermaids) and his initial goal was $3,000 and now it’s been 26 hours into the stream and he’s already over $51k. I just need people to know about this https://m.twitch.tv/hbomberguy
Hbomberguy - Twitch
Also, he’s doing it to spite Graham Lineman, a transphobic prick who did some work in some good shows, and helped get Mermaids’ funding by the National Lottery suspended, so because of his temper tantrum, as of the writing of this reblog, he’s raised almost $130k!
i joined and everyone’s talking about OllyTube’s cum what happened
Some other highlights:
-The game keeps breaking up from the seams because the emulator just BARELY can handle the game’s code hacks. The chat has to constantly remind him to save the game in case it crashes entirely.
- Harris took 6 hours off camera to sleep and in the meantime the chat devolved into shitposting about feet and teeth (or FEETH).
- Meanwhile on twitter: Glinneham is throwing a pissy transphobic tantrum on twitter due to the stream while #ThanksGraham has started trending in Europe, U.S. and Australia.
-Insane amount of guest streamers including Chelsea Manning, Jim Sterling, Ollie Thorn and the game’s composer and DK’s voice actor, Grant Kirkhope
- Kirkhope saying TRANS RIGHTS in his DK voice.
I love that of the hundreds of guest speakers from politicians and activists to composers and sports stars, the Scottish Parliament chose to give special mention to Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez… And a cat.
Hero Rats
@jitterbugjive
THEY’RE SO CUTE AND GOOD AND SMART AND HAVE JOB
I’ll always reblog hero rats!
this same species is also trained to identify tuberculosis in samples by smell, meaning they can test for TB at a rapid rate with a high accuracy :)
The organization that trains the rats is APOPO
You can sponsor a rat and you will get adorable personalized emails telling you how well “your” rat is doing! I did this for my sister a few years ago and she’s still getting emails about Martok the HeroRat’s mine-clearing successes and called it the best gift ever.
SPONSOR A RAT
Here is the page for a pop rat sponsorship!
Schizophrenic people are 14 times more likely to be victims of a violent crime than commit one.
“(Schizophrenic) Individuals in this sample were at least 14 times more likely to be victims of a violent crime than to be arrested for one. In general, the risk associated with being in the community was higher than the risk these individuals posed to the community”
This means that neurotypicals are a much bigger threat to schizophrenic people than schizophrenic people are to neurotypicals.
You can now shove all your “psycho killer” stereotypes up your ass.
I’d really appreciate if non schizophrenic people reblogged this cause the misconception that schizophrenic people are dangerous is so widespread and I really want people to see this post so that they won’t react with fear and apprehension when they meet a schizophrenic person.
go find what a fic of ur life would be tagged as on ao3
i h a v e m a d e a m i s t a k e
strictly platonic therapy rimming
vintage seaside emotions
Every time
Blood soaked horticultural pegging. Oh Kay.
Now with more suburban frottage
blood-soaked autumnal striptease
Semi-public dictator comeplay
homo-erotic pop punk love story
I’ll take it
Sexy Canadian Foot fetish
Fully clothes internet-“hate”-sex