For Living History, technically all of our characters (at the start) were translated over from another game, and in that game their entire species goes by they/them with no specified gender identity or sexuality. So we kept the they/them pronouns, but it felt weirdly unrealistic for them to all come from different backgrounds but all have the same pronouns. Between that and just feeling like slapping "nonbinary" on there & calling it a day was boring, we applied a headcanon that elves in general, then specifically Dark Elves, then specifically Dark Elves of each of their given backgrounds, would have more genders than how "male, female, and both" are presented in-game.
"Elf gender" is the broad shorthand category to suggest the presence of more nuance both within and outside of the Imperial genders. Elves as a whole (read: Aldmer and all cultural descendants) have "accepted" gender identities that are tied foremost to position in society, then inclination towards certain physical characteristics including sex, then either pronoun usage or relationship with the outside world. For example, the canon character Karliah is she/her in a nonbinary way to us, because her elf gender is something that's fitting of her archetype: Dunmer rogue with obscured gender-neutral physical expression who has a feminine name and goes by she/her. There's probably some more unique pronoun that would fit her gender better that Dunmer especially might know to use, but it simplifies to "she/her".
Felda-ryn and Gosan both started as "binary genders" and discovered they did not identify with those gender roles at different rates. They're Ashlanders from (initially) different clans who were raised in a way that fit the cultural gender expectations of their given clan: Felda-ryn being "spitfire female warrior" and Gosan being "male warrior who is devout". Felda-ryn also had additional gender complication from being raised as a potential Nerevarine-- obviously "Nerevarine" did not subsume male or female, but "Hero-gender" is very much a thing that potential Incarnates would have had applied to them. When they both had their revelations about how they truly identified-- Felda-ryn as not a female & an adventurer not warrior, and Gosan as not a male and not devout in the culturally expected way-- they strayed from those pre-set definitions and fell off the "binary". Their pronouns (she/her & he/him -> they/them) were a crucial part of this change of identity.
Puraneri is also an Ashlander but despite going by he/him for a long while, their gender identity was both traditonal among their clan and one that we would consider "nonbinary". Puraneri was the brewer and as such they ended up being the one that the whole social network of the clan revolved around; their identity was being the producer & maintainer of the clan's cohesion. Unlike gendered positions such as Wise Woman, "hearth-keeper/community pillar" is its own gender identity because it is irrevocable from how they present, while their specific choice of pronoun is really just a footnote that doesn't change much of anything.
Dalas, my Dunmer Dragonborn, is "mixed" in almost every way you can be. They were born in the Velothi mountains on the Morrowind side but they were born in a refugee group that migrated into Skyrim when they were little, so they culturally adapted to Skyrim and the Nordic lifestyle. They were raised partially & significantly by Gosan and Puraneri, but the refugee group was comprised of mostly non-Ashlanders and was never established as an Ashlander clan/not raised with many consciously Ashlander traditions, so Dalas doesn't really have that cultural identity either. They've also got a lot of soul/incarnation shenanigans going on, but either way in terms of gender they're the most literal nonbinary character I have. They've never even been on the binary because there wasn't one for them to be a part of-- they don't fit into any perspective, be it Mer or Nord or Ashlander or Imperial. They don't have any biney. Once the events of Living History start getting underway they pretty much become Hero-gender whether they want to be or not, but that's still not on a "binary".
Gadro is non-binary in both an elf way and a Daedra way, because they're a Demiprince. Their gender is as incomprehensible to the mortal mind as it is to their own. They figured it out pretty easily, they just can't explain it to you. It's vibes-based, y'know?
Ysara is the only non-elf & binary character that I've got. She's a lesbian woman. She used to be a Breton and now she's a vampire but neither of those has had any significant impact on her gender or sexuality whatsoever. That girl likes girls and she's messyyyyy about it.
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