Make what you can't not make.

Same name on Livejournal and AO3, if you're into that kind of thing.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Shoutout to the people who grew up in a house where being gay or trans was just never talked about.

Shoutout to the people whose parents support lgbt rights but never told their kids until they were in their teens or twenties because they said it was “difficult to explain to children”.

Shoutout to the people whose religious communities came out in support just a little too late.

Shoutout to everyone afraid to come out just because they know they’ll be safe physically but they don’t know how everything will change socially.

Shoutout to everyone whose internalized homophobia that they’re trying to overcome came from subtle cues and not explicit statements.

Shoutout to the in betweeners. The pain you felt is real.

[transfemme-shelterdog]

As a trans woman, I really, really, don't appreciate people acting like they know what it was like for me growing up. Like yeah, I realize that your childhood was like that and I'm sorry that you were treated that way. But don't act like that's how it is for everyone.

I was very much seen as one of the guys growing up. I went to "boys nights" with the guys, which typically consisted of very masculine activities, I had gay cis dudes hit on me, I never once was seen as anything other than a dude.

Guys never once mistreated me, or saw me as anything other than a man. Even through University, I was seen as a man to the point where my University friends were shocked when I came out to them as a trans woman.

I was even treated as "one of the safe ones" all through high school by the girls I hung out with. I had an all female friend group that I hung out with and gossiped with, and was allowed to hang out with them in and out of school, because friendship with me never came with the possibility that I was gonna make things weird and try to fuck them. I showed no interest in dating them and treated them like any other person.

They literally called me a "Girl's guy".

So, your experience isn't universal, and I really wish people would stop acting like their trauma is standard. Because it's not.

[transfemme-shelterdog]

And then there's my husband, who hated being a girl, hated femininity, was bullied by girls growing up, never had any friends aside from a few guys in high school, and was never accepted as a girl by girls.

Trans experiences aren't universal.

[gh0st-note]

They truly aren’t, because I for one actually grieve the boy I used to be, even though that isn’t who I am anymore. I mourn what could have been and yet I’m excited for what is going to be. I felt fine being a boy, and was very much seen as one of the “bros” once I finally found a friend group (even if they still treat me as one of the bros but that’s a separate matter) I personally had very little trauma surrounding my identity growing up as a young lad, even if I constantly felt out of place. Just like being trans is a spectrum, so is trauma. No one’s trauma is the same and you CANNOT presume what other people have gone through.

[vaspider]

I have such complicated feelings about my body and gender and growing up, like... I wouldn't be who I am if I hadn't been an Oldest Daughter and an Oldest Of Three Sisters in a very conservative rural home*. I loved being successfully pregnant! I hated everything else about having a uterus. Once we were done working together, I wanted it gone.

There is not one true way to be Trans any more than there is one true way to be a man, a woman, or non-binary.

*my brother and I had a loooong conversation about that once we both came out, bc like... having been that thing was important to both of us, but so was no longer being that thing. And it felt shitty to me to deny our sister's life experience too by saying "sorry, that didn't actually happen. We were never sisters."

[hachama]

I said "when I was a little girl" to TH recently, and bless him, he tried to correct me.

"NO, Imi. You aren't a girl."

Sweetheart, back then I thought i was.

"NO"

Which is to say, gender can't be flattened without losing something. It's a social construct. It's a set of traits linked to secondary sex characteristics. It's a spectrum. It's a Potato Head of expression and performance and identity. It's all of those things and none of them and I'm going to shake it shake it shake it shake it until all the weird stereotypes fall out and then I'm going to EAT IT with GLITTER and KETCHUP.

And if there's one universal way to experience any of that^, I'll eat that too.

[catboybiologist]

I hate to be all "cis good" on main, but if it weren't for the cis queer women that welcomed me into womanhood idk where I would be

[catboybiologist]

Shout-out to cis queer women that welcome trans women because that was genuinely a foundational part of developing confidence in my femininity

[catboybiologist]

There's this huge media storm that, even when it's supposed to be "trans positive" still paints this atmosphere of separation between trans and cis women. This has been the opposite of my experience. I'm grateful for the solidarity between all women <3

[bee-dazzle]

There are gonna be young cis women who are gonna delight in helping you find out what sort of clothes you wanna wear, how to look after your skin and hair, helping you on the path to learning the difference between like, what you feel you *should* present like vs what is actually comfortable and authentically you.

There are going to be menopausal cis mums who are on the same brand of estrogen patch as you who are gonna join you in griping about getting them to stick and swapping tips for when you get dispensed the big patches but your dose is half that.

There are going to be infertile cis women who share your pain and anger at the concept that 'able to bear children' is seen as the only 'real' way to be a woman.

There are gonna be intersex cis women who understand what it's like to have your body's default state not line up with societal expectations.

There are gonna be queer cis women who will stand with you at Pride, who will welcome you to our family, our community.

[catboybiologist]

I want to reblog this a thousand times. I've seen all of this, and it is so beautiful and pure and we all need it for survival. I love women, I love the solidarity we all have, and I love what we can all do for each other <3

[catboybiologist]

The notes on this post are a set of the most beautiful stories I've heard about welcoming and solidarity between all women, cis and trans.

Please keep sharing these. They truly are a joy, and are giving me a lot of hope <3

[lottielunalady]

reblogged this earlier but actually have something to add. the barely 20 year old cis girl who came up to me in the train station to ask me if she could stand with me. who told me all her friends left and she felt nervous waiting alone. who waited with me and told me to get home safe as we got on the train together. the fact that you felt like I was a safe and kind woman you could lean on a little?

Probably the single most affirming social experience I've had with a stranger. The fact you chose me of everyone in the train station means you saw me in a crowd and picked me out and said "That's a girl's girl."

[takostacos]

Shout out to the group of middle aged cis moms I met at the liquor store when I was looking for wine. The one that said "oh honey, you just wiped off your makeup." And gestured at her upper lip after I wiped the sweat off my face with a handkerchief from my purse.

I was having a lot of dysphoria about my upper lip hair suddenly having color to it (medicine side effect it seems). So I was internally wondering if they'd ostracize me since they'd clocked me.

One of the women goes "oh it's okay, I have PCOS too. Don't let it bother you." And suddenly I've got 3 women chatting with me and lamenting how they have to "shave almost every day at this point" and just cackling. The store worker joined in, saying she plucks constantly, and her "transgender friend has to shave 2 or more times a day!". They all had these genuine reactions and "oh no, poor girl" and other comments.

I felt included. I never mentioned that I was transgender.. I just carried on, they helped me pick out wines, gave me some tips on undertones for makeup to cover facial hair stubble, and I got the shop worker to pull out some elderflower liqueur to add to a small sample of a Pinot Grigio (and got more people to try it and add it to their rotation. Seriously, try it sometime. It's incredible).

The random solidarity and genuine reactions I've received from other women has been very validating and honestly so welcome.

[makeitwrite]

I actually have one for this. I work in food service, and I was working in that industry for... Almost a decade before I came out. And I came out at age 27, didn't start HRT until I was 28. Despite the sheer size of the city I live in, a not insignificant portion of the industry knows who I am. And so when I get a new job, I usually have to come out a few times.

I had had this job for a couple of months, and while I was working I was told we had a stage coming in later to see how they fit in. I say great and go on my break. When I come back, the potential hire is there... And she's a coworker from a couple jobs ago (like two or three years previous). We both slowly point at each other and go "Aren't you... ?" Before laughing and reintroducing ourselves. I go "Sooo I'm a girl now," and she laughs and tells me "Yeah I can tell." We spend some time catching up, and we work great together, and she gets hired.

A few days later I tell her I'm jealous of her bandana — you need something to cover your hair at work, and I'd been using a baseball cap, but I felt it made me look really masculine, even after several years of HRT — and she immediately pulls out a spare and shows me how to wear it. I still love the selfie I took that day, I was beaming. And from there it was very clear she just... accepted me as one of the girls. She'd tell me about men being shitty to her, and about the consistent misogyny we face, and even helped me at a sapphic night at a bar. It was just... Instant solidarity. It was amazing. We're still friends today.

[queerasaurus-rexx]

when my close friend came out, my mother (who had a hysterectomy years ago and had been in estrogen) gave her some general advice about it.

she also gave her a list of things that would help with the bodily transition while on estrogen, from good bras, general breast health tips (not even just lump checks - how to deal with friction or rashes underneath the breasts, how to get properly fitted for a bra, etc.) and just - general stuff a mother would do for a daughter going through puberty.

it is general human nature to help and take care of each other. cruelty isn't.

[pinkmadnessing]

Reading all this after a weekend of shopping for girl clothes with a cis friend of mine who was so excited to help that i literally didnt have to leave the dressing room because she kept bringing me dresses and stuff that looked great on me. This shit is so true, let the people in your life help you, they want to so much.

[queerbeverage]

When i was 17 and still in school, i came out some time at the start of my last year. I couldn't handle all the misgendering anymore, now that i knew who i was. I was very lucky in general with my realisation & transition, in this case especially so bc everyone in my year accepted me. Fast forward to sports classes, and i was still changing in the men's - even if it felt really awkward & wrong. Then, some of the cis girls in my sports class talked to me about it, and immediately told me to come change in the women's next time, like it was so obvious to them that's what it should be like. I was really really moved, because they were all so enthusiastic & nice about supporting me.

A few weeks after that, one of them gave me a coupon & a few tips about nail polish so i could get some more variety than the 2€ black one i was using. I was so moved by that, we didn't even know each other that well.

[stormsbourne]

part of what terfs are trying to do is to paint cis women as inherently threatened by and unwelcoming to trans women in an effort to get trans women to self-censor and self-seclude. but the truth is that most cis women (including most lesbians!) are welcoming and loving of trans women. most cis women are happy to help their new sisters find their way. I'm not going to preach the whole "all girls protect each other" thing (untrue), but I am going to say that by a pretty large majority, most cis women want trans women to feel welcomed, included, and safe. don't let terfs convince you that every cis woman will hate you or wants you dead. the same way rapists assume everyone else commits rape, terfs assume everyone else has the same fear and hatred in their hearts, and it's just not true. live authentically and most people will respect and love you for it. and fuck the people who try and throw a shitfit.

[voltaspistol]

[estrogenesis-eeveeangelion]

How do you get the courage to transition/come out? Right now I'm studying at a small college and I just feel a crippling lack of anonymity. The idea of coming out to my teachers or classmates, or even being recognized by people who knew me as a guy, feels so extraordinarily terrifying and shameful. I'm so terrified of attention in that regard, especially if it's negative. I know that it's a bad idea to wait for a better situation, but I just never got over caring about how people perceive me and the idea of transitioning is legitimately paralyzingly scary. I feel like I just need someone to force me to.

anon, i love you. this shit is hard and i know the feelings you are talking about. i wish i had better news for you, but nobody is going to force you. in fact pretty much every institution and cultural norm on earth as well as the existing biases of probably a majority of people everywhere are all inclined toward discouraging you from doing this.

but estrogenesis, i hear you cry, that's not encouraging at all. it isn't. but i have good news too. you wouldn't be asking me this if you weren't already sure that this is something that you want and need. the hardest part -- not knowing -- is over. i understand the impulse to look around you and wish that it looked less like an uphill battle, and to fixate on the pushback you will probably get from outside. but the solution isn't going to come from reducing that pushback, it's going to come from overcoming it.

you are, understandably, intimidated. but the thing is, you're only looking outward. my advice to you is to look inside. do you want this? i think you do. do you love yourself enough to decide that you deserve it? do you love yourself enough to say that it's yours, that everything that comes with it is yours? you will never move forward if you are waiting for anybody to give you permission because on this bitch earth? they never, ever will. you have to love yourself so much that you can decide that you have a right to this and you'll be god damned if anybody's going to stop you. you're not seeking their permission, you are doing your fucking thing and anybody who doesn't understand can get the fuck out the way.

i wish i had a better answer to "how do i get over caring about how people perceive me" than "you just have to love yourself so incandescently that they can't even cast a shadow in your direction" but that's basically it. take some time, mourn the idea that everybody's gonna like you, and then put on some 2024 kendrick lamar & make up your mind that anyone who isn't on board is dead to you. that's the best advice ive got. i love you.

[estrogenesis-eeveeangelion]

les girlies are showing UP in the notes with good advice, anon

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

feels important to keep this post alive

[tiktoks-i-enjoyed]

Clip of Lucy Dacus on the Las Culturistas podcast.

[milkymosaic]

Characters who choose death but are forced to live, my beloveds.

Characters who have to come to terms with a second chance at life they never asked for, my darlings.

Characters who move forward on the trembling legs of a newborn fawn through the overwhelming, blinding crush of an existence they fully forsook but which was thrust back upon their unwilling beings, my obsessions.

[inthefallofasparrow]

Hot Shit | Tom Cardy

[explicitnoir]

[reynard61]

Let's ambush mama! 😼

[dvandom]

"Why do Pallas cats always look grumpy?"

"Pallas kittens."

[waywardmartian]

The sheer roundness of this kitten must be admired.

[elegantpersoncreation-2]

Carneddau pony foal..

[spankerella]

@ goodgoodgoodco

[barkingbarghest]

One Wisconsin City Beat Back a Data Center. Now Residents Are Helping Others Do the Same.

When a secretive $1.6 billion data center proposal landed in Menomonie with almost no warning, residents had weeks to fight back. They won —

Residents had serious concerns about the project. While companies often win major tax breaks by promising jobs and economic stimulation, data centers bring few permanent jobs and can drain municipal water resources, drive up electric bills, rob cities of tax revenues, and cause damaging noise, light, and air pollution. Already, Wisconsin residents have seen some of these impacts at data center sites in Port Washington and Beaver Dam. Residents in Port Washington have complained about the disruption caused by around-the-clock construction at the new data center. Families near the construction in Beaver Dam have reported that their wells have run dry.

Although the Menomonie City Council voted to annex and rezone the land for the data center in early September [2025], pressure from local campaigners was so great that Mayor Randy Knaack announced at a Sept. 22 city council meeting that he had notified Balloonist that the city would not be moving forward with a development agreement. More good news came in January when the Menomonie City Council voted unanimously to place additional regulations on data center projects.

Menomonie City Council passes new definition for data center projects

This comes after the city experienced major push back from a proposed data center last year.

This new ordinance will reclassify data centers and other similar large businesses. Menomonie mayor Randy Knaack says it will allow the city to institute strict guidelines. He says it puts the city on an even playing field with big businesses. “The new zoning will have some perspective on certain issues. It might be water use, it could be height of the building, noise, electricity usage. Those kinds of parameters with the new zoning. So, the city of Menomonie will actually have a better opportunity to bargain, or make things better if things move forward,” said Knaack.

[corvidcall]

to anyone in the areas impacted by the wildfire smoke, my #1 biggest piece of advice as someone whos been dealing with wildfire smoke in the NW united states for years, is build yourself a Corsi-Rosenthal Cube

they perform as well as expensive HEPA air cleaners, and are comparatively VERY inexpensive. all you need is a box fan, 4 air filters, a piece of cardboard, and some duct tape!!!!

i think it took us maybe a half hour to put ours together, if that, and we replace the filters every 3 months. it's really made a HUGE difference, both when the air quality is bad, but also with our allergies

[o0fyuu0o]

Saw these easy to read instructions on Twitter. Stay safe 💚

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

Great time to start pricing this out by the way, fire season starts… on the summer solstice this year, that’s fun. Signs point to it being a doozy.

[makingqueerhistory]

World’s First Chinese LGBTQ Museum Opens in San Francisco’s Chinatown | Hotspots Magazine

Hundreds gathered in San Francisco’s Chinatown as city leaders and community members celebrated the opening of the world’s first Chinese LGB

Hundreds gathered in San Francisco’s Chinatown as city leaders and community members celebrated the opening of the world’s first Chinese LGBTQ museum. Mayor Daniel Lurie joined supporters for the ribbon-cutting ceremony at the OUT Museum, a space dedicated to preserving and sharing Chinese queer history and culture. The museum was founded by Chinese artist and LGBTQ advocate Xiangqi Chen, who spent more than 20 years promoting queer visibility in China before moving to the United States in 2023.

June 5, 2026

[talkingharrystyles]

Absolutely amazing 🏳️‍🌈🫶🌈

[lolsomeone-actually]

HERE ARE THE PICS causw I wanted to see and saw no one posted (link to profile: https://instagram.com/henryjimenz?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= )

So beautiful!!!

[slothful-rabbit]

I laughed so fucking hard at this

[potatochipship]

[the-semicolonoscopy]

“What the fuck do you think freedom means, Earl?” is right up there with “Harold, they’re lesbians.”

[the-semicolonoscopy]

Reblogging for pride month.

[the-semicolonoscopy]

Bringing this one back again for pride month.

[ultrareginarules]

“Harold, they’re lesbians” is the EXACT thing I thought of when I listened to this. Same energy. Love it.

[dracofidus-deactivated20200523]

If you EVER think Anthony Head is anything less than an angel then you’d best remember that I have always been a huge fan of his and we’ve always had a little contact over the years and he heard I’d come out as Trans and was having a hard time and that I was kind of sad that the photos I had from conventions with him were of me with long hair and no binder and they were all signed to “Sarah” and so he invited me to spend the day with him at his farm and he picked me up from the station and we just hung out and had lunch and he insisted on paying and took loads of photos and had them printed on photo paper the same day so he could sign them to Jay, along with other photos of him as Giles and Uther and he literally spent five hours chatting with me and got all of the pronoun stuff right every time and then he dropped me off at the station, gave me a final massive hug, waved me through the ticket barrier and insisted I message him when I got home so he knew I got back safe. (More HERE)

[politelymenacing]

Feel like now is a good time to remind people of this.