Child Of Hades

Aubrey_ 27_Leo_Queer_Constantly exhausted

[fullofbugs84uy894ujui9]

reminder that this blog, while not politically focused, supports BLM. bootlickers and racists aren’t welcome here, and never will be.

[clueless1995]

[icedteadrinker]

Limmy deleted best tweet of all time I'm so mad

[stricatul]

no one talks about how draining it is when your mood is constantly switching between "its okay, i don't care. l'll be okay" and "I don't know how much more I can take"

[autistic-evil-xisuma]

people always talk about evil clones like oooh a dark mirror oohh what if you saw what are cruel person you were/are capable of becoming. and well yes but what if you were the evil clone. what if you looked in the mirror and what you saw was so bright it blinded you. what if you had to know exactly how good you could have been.

[boringsl0th]

[saul-tortellini]

[moldavite]

even a forehead kiss would have a maladjusted freak like me bricked the fuck up. to be honest

[homunculus-argument]

"ohh my god you can't just-"

Am I yours to command? Does the collar 'round my neck have your name on it? I kneel to no king nor god, and I see no crown on you.

[penisgeorge]

you wear a collar

[homunculus-argument]

I may choose to kneel recreationally.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

the soft animal of my body wants to fucking bite someone

[annabelle--cane]

the first law of tragedies: the end is already written and inevitable. the second law of tragedies: your actions are all your own and you can choose to get off this ride whenever you want. the third law of tragedies: we both know that you are never going to do that.

[sweatermuppet]

[sitting completely still in my own bed] this world is gutting me like a fish

[mad-arcana]

Eventually I will remember large tattoos are really painful

[anxietyproblem]

[mad-arcana]

“The universe is telling you to change your path.”

Okay. Well. It could’ve done that in a way that didn’t involve getting into a car accident one night and then the next morning having somebody tell me I might not have a job come November. That would’ve been nice

[sweatermuppet]

yeah sorry they gave me an open wound instead of a heart that's why im like this

[stuckinapril]

are u ever sick w longing. and i don't just mean romantic longing. i mean longing for a place you barely get to see, longing for friends you no longer have, longing for feelings you might have left behind in your childhood, longing for creativity, longing for a rich and more expansive life, longing for less inhibition. longing for more passion. longing for ur life to be so incandescent w something it thaws all the frost in ur bones. are u ever so consumed w it it rends ur heart in two. do u understand me

[stuckinapril]

this is not just "look out the window and sigh" longing. i'm talking you're at the grocery store and you're suddenly hit w a wave of grief bc you don't have it. you don't have whatever it is you ache so badly to have. you go about your everyday life and yet it throbs under your skin moment by moment, almost as though it has a life of its own. that's the kind of longing i mean.

[syzygy-yzygy]

So sick of dog motif what about cat motif.

I love you but we don't love the same. I can't be near you when you want me to be. Your love is smothering and your need to keep me safe is trapping me. I'm my own person but I don't know how to show you that. I lash out and hurt you even though I don't mean to. I need you to move slowly around me or I'll bolt. I love you, even though I don't say it. If you stay still I'll sit next to you, and even though we don't understand each other we can be together like that.

[syzygy-yzygy]

@aspengrown this is the rawest possible addition to this post thank you

[mylordshesacactus]

and also:

cat love as in I am small and scared and all of my instincts and my experience and your vast power say you're a threat but I am choosing to trust in your kindness despite my fear. you could kill me with one hand but I know you won't.

cat love as in I can tell you are upset and I don't understand why so I will sit stiffly beside you and awkwardly provide the only reassurance I know how to give. I am uncomfortable with every single moment of this but it is what you would do for me.

cat love as in I am small and powerless but I will curl up back to back with you and stand guard while you sleep and I will mean it with every fiber of my being.

my cat Nepenthe was a former stray behavior case at risk of euthanasia because she kept mauling potential adopters. on her second week in my apartment--having already attacked me multiple times without provocation, I will add, I wasn't special, she needed genuine help--she slinked out of the bedroom yowling at me. when I went to check on her she kept walking back and forth until I followed her, where she insistently paced between my feet and her hidey-hole in the back of my dresser, increasingly distressed. about three seconds after she gave up and hid, an absolutely torrential rain front hit. she didn't understand yet that we couldn't get wet inside. she'd been trying to warn me.

she didn't know me yet, but she knew I hadn't yelled at her when she hurt me. she knew I hadn't tried to hurt her back. she didn't understand why she was attacking me; those episodes probably scared her more than me. she knew I "shared" food with her, and that I asked before touching her. and she went out of her way to bring me into her safe space, to protect her friend.

cat love as stiff hesitant uncertain acts of service that are devastating in their sincerity, as well.

[naamahdarling]

I'm sorry, I had a response to add on, but now I'm crying over your cat. Oh my god.

[glorioustidalwavedefendor]

cat love as stiff hesitant uncertain acts of service that are devastating in their sincerity, as well.

He had the awkward tenderness of someone who has never been loved and is forced to improvise.

Isabel Allende, from The House of The Spirits

[mad-arcana]

Alright skydiving didn’t give me the rush or feeling of autonomy I was looking for time to start planning a new tattoo