I was wrong

I'm gay now

[sixteenplagues-deactivated20230]

windows 8 can suck my dick

[dild0]

I can’t believe how far technology has come

[i-cant-think-of-anything-to-say]

hunting down tumblr posts i see on pinterest part 1196

[i-give-you-a-fish]

You get a Northern Hogsucker

Hypentelium nigricans

[i-give-you-a-fish]

May I please get a fish, specifically of the jawless variety.

You get a Pacific Lamprey

Entosphenus tridentatus

[kaylmao]

shh don’t worry catholics aren’t real

thank god. i mean thank something else

[femmchantress]

I don’t care if Monday’s yuck

Tuesday, Wednesday tread through muck

Thursday maybe eat a duck

It’s Friday, Flat as Fuck

[ladyofthebookcase]

aw mannnn

[larkandkatydid]

New local scandal is an old woman who will walk down to her mailbox in her robe, then, when no cars are driving by, lay down next to her mailbox as if she’s fallen or been hit by a car. Tourists will stop, help her up, and walk her to her house. Then, after they leave, she’ll repeat this until she’s bored with it.

Her neighbors have called the cops a bunch but have been told that it’s not illegal to fake being an old lady in peril so soft-hearted tourists or newcomers are nice to you. One of the neighbors sometimes yells “oh, get up, Lois!” at her. But overall local sentiment is that this is at least somewhat enviable levels of not giving a fuck.

[gin-juice-tonic]

that anon calling Soos “nonbinary with left bro” is still stuck in my mind

[greelin]

“when i was little” brother you are 5’3. so you must mean yesterday. or five minutes ago.

[segamascott]

“i'll be there shortly” yeah. we know.

[fried-berries]

it will get cold again. one day soon it will be cold again. my beautiful cold weather where I am not constantly a soggy sweaty overheating piece of raw fish

[gardensnakie]

eueueu

[spellinwaiting]

not many people know this but when talking about your multiple pronoun-using friend you build up a combo meter for every subsequent unique pronoun you use

[girlnotthis]

An accidental Magritte painting in Bundoora

[neenarchive]

maidens if you are going to flee dramatically from my castle in the middle of the night once i reveal my true nature to you please leave your candelabra on the little ledge by the portcullis we are running out of them

[neenarchive]

starting to think these maidens are stumbling in soaked through from the rain just to steal my beautiful gowns and homewear are any of you actually lost

[elektrashocktherapy]

At the checkout in Home Goods loading the belt with nothing but candelabras in all shapes & sizes while the cashier watches sympathetically and asks if it’s the maidens again

[victimizationvictim]

[were--ralph]

the problem with tumblr spells is all of you lil sluts are casting and not giving it time to charge so you're all casting cantrips and not 9th level death spells. everyone wants to be the one to take them down no one wants to be the one who assists

[were--ralph]

we're going to try again witha little but minimal casting

IT will happen in August of 2026. like to charge and reblog to cast but cast sparingly

[were--ralph]

Wait stop. everyone +like now and spread it a little but cast on the same day in August. lets try August 6th or something.

[were--ralph]

CAST NOW

[kushblazer666]

[dumbpuppyfag]

smitten is such a great word :) omg he's so cute it feels like i'm being killed by god